Flotsam
by thedeadflag
Summary: A pre-ME1 backstory of A.Shepard's life as a young emaciated orphan, navigating the streets of an Earth metropolis. Rated M because it gets pretty violent. I'm also kind of bad at summaries.
1. Chapter 1

_Alright, so, first off, this is a prequel/backstory for my Shep, Amber Shepard. There are some original characters, but no self inserts. _

_It all takes place within Bioware's Mass Effect Universe, their creative property. I do not own any of Bioware's stories or characters or locations._

_Though it'll probably take a while for the story to get off the planet Earth and into spaaaaaace  
_

_Secondly, this is the first time in a long while that I've written an actual story, so please help me shake off the rust and give me feedback about where to improve. I've taken these first few chapters as a trial run to get my descriptive writing back to where I want it. I would greatly appreciate any helpful comments :)_  
_ No harm done if you don't though; this is for the enjoyment of Mass Effect fans as much as it is for me._

_So yeah, enjoy? I hope? Let me know :)_

* * *

_March, 2167  
_

* * *

Even before the shuttle door opened, she knew what awaited her. She had been through this same scenario far too many times in her twelve years. The quarters would be cold, hard and dry; saturated with deteriorating mattresses and worn out cots. The hope was always that the volume of bodies would warm each other enough to make do. There wouldn't be enough first aid supplies for the injuries, illnesses and infections that would take place in the next year. There would be food enough for half the mouths that were being delivered, and that wasn't including the children already living in the new orphanage, or who were on route. There would be enough to keep them malnourished, but alive.

At least, some of them. For a time.

And finally, when the money ran out, there would be another shuttle waiting for her, if she survived. The longest she had remained in one place was St. Paul's Orphanage on Montreal road. It was nice; the headmistress had been really kind, and every third Sunday they would have ham.

_But then it burned down_, she recalled, her brow furrowing at the memory of the friends she had lost. The home she'd lost. She'd been lucky enough to sleep near a window, and escaped with only minor cuts from the broken glass. _Good things never last_.

The local gangs often used orphanages as recruitment zones, and when met with resistance, they would take matters into their own hands. More orphanages would pop up in one's place…there were always kind-hearted people ready to give a temporary home for unwanted children, especially when the government and private investors had so much interest in keeping them alive; secluded, away from sight, but alive. People probably felt better about themselves when they weren't seeing dozens of starving children on their morning commute.

_Would probably spoil their appetites_, she thought. _Not that it would mean more food in my mouth_. Any kid with their wits about them knew dumpster diving meant taking a gamble on a slow death. For as long as she knew, the city dumpsters had used some chemicals to break down the junk tossed into them, or so the older kids said. It wasn't without some basis; too many others she'd known had died in similar ways after making similar attempts. If you were fast, you could salvage freshly tossed food. Being orphans, who could generally sneak out only at night, it was a chance only a fool would take.

Her thoughts were interrupted as the doors opened, letting the warm daylight wash across her face. She had hated how dark the insides of the shuttles were, how windowless they were. It would take her a week before she knew where in Ottawa she'd been moved to. Perhaps longer if the place was on the outskirts of the city, but that was unlikely. The trip hadn't been long, and her last orphanage was near the city's core.

Nevertheless, she'd always wanted to see the chaos of city life during daylight hours. The sight of the city flying past her was one she'd always wanted to experience, and was denied it each time she'd been transported. _Maybe when I'm older_, she wondered.  
The stout, balding man who'd packed them into the shuttle started calling the children out in alphabetical order. It was over an hour before her name was finally called.

"Amber Shepard", the man announced wearily, placing incorrect emphasis on the '–pard', reminding her that getting someone who can't read well to record your identity isn't the best idea. Of course, it wasn't her idea, but somebody made that choice.

"It's pronounced like Shepherd." She reminded him, reminiscing. A young nun had used to read her an old story about a Shepherd when she was a young girl and had trouble sleeping. When her records were lost, she decided to use that instead of her old one, Karahalios, which was much harder for her and others to spell and pronounce. In the end, it made no difference. Most people used her first name anyway.

"Right, whatever." He waved her off, dismissively. "You're to head inside now."

* * *

The building was large and simple; built long ago and showing its age, but the staff obviously maintained it well. Maybe repurposed it. It was made mostly of concrete, and the windows were high up, making it likely a refurbished textile factory or something similar. Looking at the yard, she found she was surrounded. This orphanage, unlike others, was not likely funded by gangs at all; the tall barbed fencing would see to it that there would be no easy entry or exit. _Troublesome._  
Despite the charm of the security fence, the bushes along the property and building were healthy looking and well trimmed. The yard was mostly tiled with cheap stone slabs, but patterns of grassy squares filled the area; as she moved forward toward the door, she let her feet stray to one of them. The grass held an emerald green tint in the sunlight, and the earth cushioned her step as she strode across. It reminded her of the talk she'd heard about colonies that the Alliance was settling in. There were fresh planets, fields with tall grass…

"…_trees with fruit growing on 'em! Not in stores, but on trees! I swear, we should hitch onto a ship and run off to one of them colonies, we'd live like…like rich people!"_ her friend Forrest had claimed, enthusiastically, to her a few years ago. She didn't quite believe him, but she didn't mind letting the possibility remain in the recesses of her mind.

_Living on a colony isn't such a bad idea. Maybe I could be a farmer..._  
She bonked her head on the door, distracted by her daydreaming.  
_Well, at least I'd have more food than I'll ever get here. And fresh food too!... And less walls to walk into._

The door opened into a spacious chamber, vacant of any other children, though she could see a group of children being escorted down a hallway ahead and to the left of her. On the far end of the room along the wall, a tall woman stood still as a statue; her visibly sharp features were made harsh by how gaunt she was, and the pitch black dress she wore only made her seem like a specter. Her eyes remained fixed on Amber as the small, thin brunette cautiously approached the desk. The girl stopped a foot in front of the desk, not raising her eyes to the ghostly figure in front of her. For longer than she would have liked, the reception room remained silent.

"Amber Shepard." The woman's in front of her stated, matter-of-factly. Even her voice was raspy, as if there were some force attempting to prevent her speech.  
"Twelve years of age." Her words were drawn out. _Great, a creepy slow-talker_.

"Brown of hair." Shepard felt a slight chill run up her spine. There were signs of hope outside; those small patches of grass, the dazzling sunlight in the evening sky. Now, that was all but forgotten before this woman. Something about the woman simply unnerved Amber.

"Here." Shepard waited for a few moments after the woman had paused, and her eyes slowly drifted upward until they caught sight of a hand holding a small book, with a long grey utensil on top of it. She hadn't seen a book, a physical book, for a few years, and was confused. "Paper and pencil. For writing. "

Shepard couldn't help but allow the confusion to spill across her face. "Why? Paper's more expensive than datapads."

"More secure. Only one copy of writings." The woman said, taking a momentary, visible pause. "More personal." She stated, with a relaxed smile. She wasn't the best looking woman by any stretch, and she was still incredibly frightening to Shepard, but the smile was sincere and eased Shepard a little. Enough to, after a short pause, hastily grab the package from her hands.

"Please wait over to the right. The next child will be entering." Shepard's eyes were glued to the book, but she drifted off to the side of the room, nestling her shoulders on the wall. There weren't many pages in it, perhaps around a hundred, but it looked sturdy enough. The pencil had a pointed tip, which would do well enough; she preferred pens because they didn't smear or get dull, though preferred typing on datapads over both. Truth be told, she wasn't the best at writing. She could read, sure, but her writing was hardly legible to anyone; her letters would often form similarly to others, needlessly swirly and tightly packed to the point of illegibility.

_Maybe a little privacy could be nice, I guess._

* * *

The sleeping quarters were, as predicted, cramped. The beds were stacked three high, with barely a few feet between them, though there was a long distance from the top bunk to the roof. There were only a few lights in the room, and the windows were high up, though small, meaning the room would be dark more often than not. Amber was assigned the top bunk of a set near the window, allowing her a decent view at the yard and the buildings outside of it. The neighbourhood seemed fairly tame; most buildings were in decent shape, although the trash littering the streets and the obvious vandalism made it clear that it wasn't the nicest area of town either. She stashed her book under her pillowcase until she could find a more permanent solution.

The day had been uneventful and consistent with the other homes she'd been to. She and her group had visited the dining hall first. It was small-ish like others she'd been to, meaning feeding hours were staggered; it was only a matter of time before she'd learn if they had money or not. Most didn't, and fed children once a day, or once every other day…small portions at that. It was strange that most orphanages tended to show this room off first. There was a clear dissonance between what they thought they presented to the kids, and what they took in. Kids knew they'd be fed at some point, and whether there were tables didn't matter.

Only the quantity of food did. That was never discussed in the tours, ever.

The warden showed the group around the yard briefly. The other half of the yard was more fortunate, home to a spattering of small trees, none of which offered much in the way of shade. The larger squares of grass around them were appealing though, and during the daytime hours, she figured she'd put them to good use.

_This place might be good for a while.  
Until it comes down to survival.  
It ALWAYS comes down to that._

The last orphanage she was at, she had lost four of her roommates to starvation and disease, and one to the dumpsters. She remembered Greg, a scrawny boy two years younger than her, had wanted a way out. "I hear it only takes three days." He had confided in her, the night he snuck out. At that point, she was certain the orphanage would close soon and they'd be moved. He hadn't eaten in six days, neither had the others. He'd survived two weeks at the previous one, and wasn't interested in reliving that.

_He broke. Most do._

She had tried to stop him before, she had tried to stop many others. It never worked. Once, she gave up her food so her friend Gabby could eat, but she didn't get more food for another week. Amber was sick for a month. _Too close._

There wasn't much to the place aside from the yard, the dining hall, the reception room, the washrooms, and the sleeping quarters. The building wasn't set up as a school, and that almost pleased her; those ones always went under quickly. She was still young, there was much she didn't understand, but she did have her wits, and she did know that it takes credits to run places like this. It's not free. The nicer the place is, the shorter her time would be there.

It wasn't that she didn't want to leave the orphanages, but they really were all she knew. Outside of the walls and gates, life was unpredictable. Inside, they were almost always the same as they ever were, life was simple. Not enjoyable, or easy, but simple. Eat your food, learn and study, sleep. That was what life was, and she was fine with that. Even sitting atop her bed, she could hear other children prattle on about this being their last stop before they strike out on their own. Some had forgone their future by deciding to run with gangs; however, some talked about how they'll be miners, soldiers, galactic heroes, and farmers when they leave. For a moment, she left that line of thought pass through her, but she quickly shook it off.  
_I'm twelve. No point wishing for something I won't know for at least six years. That's six winters, probably five orphanages, and at least four times I'd have to survive starvation,_ she mused, so long as the pattern she had lived continued. It would. Of that, she was certain.  
_Life is simple_.

* * *

_November 8th 2167_

* * *

Several months passed. They must have, though she couldn't actually recall much about them aside from small changes to her body. Not that big of a deal, and it would have been worse for her not to have undergone them. She'd grown slightly taller, though was still a gaunt runt of a girl. More than that, it was an official declaration that she'd never be adopted.

Not that it was a surprise, really. She'd only known a few dozen to have been adopted before, and they were nearly all under the age of four. Infants. Children. Dependent. Most kids went through orphanages and either ran with gangs or joined the alliance. It was a decent enough gamble for the government. The kids knew how to live in cramped, poor conditions, they knew how valuable food and shelter was, and knew how to survive.

She had turned thirteen, but felt long divorced from the title of child.  
_Children are cared for. They have families. Mothers, fathers. They probably don't starve to death._  
She felt a tinge of bitterness seep into her, colouring her thoughts, but as soon as it was there, it was gone.  
_ I hope they don't, at least. I like to think there's something better than this out there_

Her feeding schedules really weren't all that bad. Vanier House for Orphaned Children towed a line between generosity and restriction; she'd eat once two days in a row, and the day after that she wouldn't eat. That cycle continued, and despite it being odd, she enjoyed it. She had rarely eaten two days in a row before, not without stealing the other meal. It was nice, and she appreciated it more during the long day without food, especially considering the meals were always thick and somewhat filling despite the small portions.

On the other hand, despite the food, they weren't given many freedoms. Five hours a day outside was all they were given, and the staff seemed to break up any physical activities and anything remotely fun. She guessed they didn't have much in the way of first aid supplies, by how they were cracking down on everything. With more colonies popping up and all that craziness in space that the staff would gossip over, it was probably too expensive. At least they were smart about it though. A lot of the kids were annoyed, but the food in their stomachs helped ease that somewhat.

"Hey, Birdy!" a voice from underneath her shook Amber from her thoughts. _Melody. Cute little redhead. Always coming up to bug me_. The girl had huge emerald eyes that contrasted fiercely with her hair and her face full of freckles. When Amber had first seen her, she was amazed the girl had not been adopted; she was exorbitantly cute, animated, but very put-together and polite. The redhead was about Amber's age, though looked much younger due to her shortness and her face. One morning, Amber had noticed the small girl peering wide-eyed up at her from her bedside ladder; Amber had always been somewhat restless and had poor posture, and would often perch on the balls of her feet instead of sitting normally. That quirk had quickly earned her the pet name "Birdy" from Melody. They talked here and there, ate together every once in a while, but those names were usually meant for people like close friends. She wasn't opposed to the nickname, she just didn't really get it, or why the girl was insistent on calling her it.

_Birds can fly wherever they want. They could fly right into the blue sky if they wanted. _

"Uhhhh, Earth to Birdy, are you with me? What'cha writin' about?" the redhead tilted her head as far as she could to get a glimpse at Amber's open journal, but nearly lost her balance on the ladder. Amber quickly threw out a hand and helped her up. Her bed wasn't big by any means, but two people could comfortably sit on each end. It had become her favourite spot in her new home; the grassy spots outside were nice, and she enjoyed welcoming the mid-autumn winds cooling her skin, but it would soon be too cold for her to enjoy the outdoors. Canada was cold, and the winters were made more uncomfortable when you didn't have cold weather clothing. It was winter when people got sick, and everyone was packed together, and people started dying. Not many, perhaps a dozen or two each year from illness, infection, starvation. She felt safe in her nest, above the others.

"Not much, just stuff." She responded casually, showing her visitor the page of notes she'd been writing. Melody squinted and moved her face nearly against the page, trying to figure out what scribbles were which letters.  
"Has anyone told you you're the worst at spelling? Jeez." She noted, more than a little confused, still trying to decipher the mess in front of her.

Amber laughed and prodded Melody's head away from her journal. "I'm fine at it. Not my fault you can't read." She noticed Melody's face drop a bit at that, and her eyes shifted to the side. "Oh, hey, look…I didn't mean…"

Melody immediately shot an impish grin at her. "You know, you always fall for that!" she giggled, rolling over onto her side. "Anyway, I came up wondering if you wanted to go out tonight. Jake and Selma are gonna go try to find more food and stuff." The redhead asked, excitedly.

Amber wasn't so excited at the prospect. "We get enough food here, and that fence is huge. We're in a part of town that I don't know well, and I don't know Jake and Selma enough to trust they know what they're doing. No thanks, Mel. Thanks for asking, but it's probably a bad idea, Mel."

"Awright, Birdy. You stay caged up like this, but one day you're gonna have to figure out why the early bird gets the worm." Melody joked, sliding down the ladder to her bunk.

Amber closed her journal and shoved it in the hollow she made in her mattress. _That doesn't make any sense. Sometimes that girl is a little too weird for her own good.  
_She peered out the window and knew it wouldn't be long until the kids tried to escape for the night. They'd fail, most likely. Jake was only twelve, and Selma was a dim-witted thirteen year old.

_Nothing to worry about_.

* * *

She awoke to a sudden wind and gusts of snow; a winter storm was upon her. She scrambled out of her sheet reluctantly, packing it and her journal into her now-overstuffed pillowcase. These blizzards would come unexpectedly, dragging an unwelcome change of season with them. Trees would freeze, green life would die, and animals would starve or die by their prey. She looked overhead as the winds forced leaves to evacuate wholesale, throwing themselves to the dirt to help herald in the new growths of spring. Eventually. That would be their legacy. Without the canopy, nothing would help shelter her from the snow and hail, and it was too late to migrate. The air itself was chilling quickly, she could feel its embrace across her back as the branches thrashed overhead. For a moment, the shrieking of the Northern wind was all she could hear. It filled her ears, her lungs, her heart; she felt it reverberate within her core, slow her pulse, and she shivered in kind.

And then there was warmth. Despite the fury around her, she felt a warm song swirl around her neck. It was faint, and she strained her ears to hear it. It came in three short, muted bursts, and for a moment she forgot all about the storm around her, the snow caked upon her body, the frost blackening her fingers and toes. Three frail choking sobs.

Amber's eyes opened and met the darkness of pre-dawn. Sunrise was still a ways off yet, as she didn't see the eastern sky getting any brighter. She was always a restless sleeper, and it wasn't a surprise that her sheet wasn't covering her. As she felt for it, her hand touched something hard. Amber held her breath and could still hear the soft, muted sobs behind her; she wasn't used to this…whatever this was. Her bed was her sanctuary, and someone had probably come up and not noticed her there, disrupting her solitude.

She slowly turned her body over, trying not to let the mattress creak out in dismay. It took her eyes a few moments to focus on the figure nestled at the edge of her bed, wrapped in her sheet. Her breath caught sharply in her throat.

_Melody?_  
She reached out for the shaking, sleeping figure a few inches away and cautiously pulled her up against her. She wasn't sure what to do, what would help, but she figured a hug might help. _Those always seemed to help others_,_ I think_. Amber could feel her tunic get increasingly damp as the redhead sobbed into her sheet and chest. She just held onto her, and closed her eyes. It was cold tonight, and they could both use a little relief from the encroaching winter.

* * *

Amber woke, bleary-eyed, at just after sunrise._ It'll be a clear, beautiful day_, she thought with a smile, lifting her head to get a good look out the window before lowering her vision to the girl curled up against her. _Well, maybe a troublesome beautiful day, but can anyone complain too much when the sun's rays are as warm as they are today? At least fall is giving us one last sigh of heat_.

She rested her head back on the pillow and decided not to rush Melody awake. As uncomfortable as her wet shirt was, a shower and change of clothes could wait. She wanted to give her… friend… a decent sleep before she found out what caused her to come crying to her bed last night. She didn't think she had been that personable with the redhead, not that she was complaining. She smirked, thinking it was kind of nice, if unexpected, that someone would come to her for comfort. Amber had been solitary for the last few years, and it had probably helped keep her alive, but she had envied the closeness some others had with each other. You don't grow up as quickly when you can goof off with others. While she liked Melody enough, she wasn't sure it was the best idea to get all buddy-buddy with her.

_For now, though, I won't second-guess her_. She mused to herself in a soft whisper, closing her eyes and gathering her thoughts. _Another nap might be a good idea_.

* * *

Melody had woken up a few hours afterward, grasping onto Amber tightly. Her sobs came on like a storm, filling the whole room with her emotional maelstrom. Most of the kids were awake and outside, or hanging around the dining hall, which had become something of a meeting area, even when food wasn't being served; they wouldn't get many vocal protests this morning, especially on such a warm day. Amber, for her part, was silent.

The girl's words and sobs melded into each other to form a cohesive, unintelligible whole. One day, she'd have to return the favor and mock Melody for her poor speaking skills, but it certainly wasn't the time for that. She had kept the redhead up against her, stroking her hair to try and calm her down. _This isn't working_. Her thoughts drifted, trying to figure out how to put Melody more at ease.

Amber took the girl's head in her hands and put a bit of space between them, raising Melody's chin to get a better look at her face. With a thumb, she wiped away some of her tears, but they just kept coming.

"Mel, honey, you're safe here." She whispered, her right hand cupping the side of the girl's face. "And if you need to let it all out, then I'll be here. I'm not going anywhere. But I can't help you if I don't know what happened. Can I ask you something? Just…"  
Amber placed a hand between Melody's. "…squeeze my hand tight if it's a yes. Can you do that?"

Melody answered with a squeeze, still sobbing. _Jeez, what the heck happened last night? This girl is normally as bright as the morning._  
"Did you get past the fence?" Her hand immediately felt crushed in a vice. _This will leave a mark,_ she thought, grimacing_._

"Did you three make it back?" Melody's grip lightened, but still clasped around her hand.

"Did one of you get lost?" No squeeze. Amber hesitated a little until the lump in her throat passed.

"Were you three attacked?" Again, Melody crushed Amber's hand, forcing a gasp from her.

"Did Jake make it back?" Her grip lightened. _Shit_.

"Did Selma make it back?" No squeeze. _Oh no_.

"Did the attacker see you?" she braced herself for the grip that Melody unleashed on her. Her hand was aching, but she was getting answers. She leaned in close to Melody and looked her in those swollen, bloodshot emerald eyes.

"Honey, you're safe now. No one is going to come past that fence after you. If you want…" _Oh what the hell am I doing? I can't promise her safety…but I guess I can promise her I'll help her_. "…you can stay up here with me if it makes you feel better. As long as you need."

The girl's sobs had lightened by then, but she was still crying up a minor flood. It had been a long time since Amber had a friend, or someone who trusted her, and she hated seeing Melody scared like this. That noted, she enjoyed feeling wanted and being somewhat of a protector, so it wasn't an entirely selfless endeavour. Her brow furrowed, _this is going to be a lot more work, though. Still not likely a good idea_.

She gently wiped the slowing tears from Melody, allowing a smile to spread across her lips when the redhead looked up, hopeful at Amber.

_Eh, she's worth it. She needs someone. May as well be me._

"Now, just let me know when you're up for getting some food. There's no rush."

For the first time all day, Melody's eyes lit up.

* * *

As the ragged looking pair waded through the crowd in the dining hall, it was clear they were being watched closely. Melody wasn't as aware; she'd taken a while to cheer up enough to embark, and was pretty single-minded on getting food around dinnertime. Amber noticed some of the older kids at one of the larger tables had their eyes glued on them as they went to get their fill. Looking around for some of the staff, she recognized one or two orderlies and the cooking crew. _Not enough help to get us out of this. I'll have to think on my feet. At least Hal is there, he could be of use_.

She'd hoped they could eat without an incident, but she knew it probably wouldn't have been that easy. It had been a few months, and the gangs likely had more than a few orphans in their pockets. The two of them took their bowls of stew and Amber led the way to a table near an orderly. _Gives me some time and space, at least. _

The stew was unremarkable; bits of fake-beef, mostly vegetables like potatoes, carrots and celery. It tasted mediocre, but it was filling. It would keep them going for another day or two easily. She slowed her pace eating to give them more time once she noticed Melody scarfing hers back. Amber felt inside her pants pocket and found her sharpened pencil. _God, I hope I won't need this_. She took her last spoonful and couldn't help but give a tired laugh at how relieved Melody looked.

"Hey Mel, can you do me a favor?" the girl looked attentively at her, but unconcerned. _Good_. "Can you ask Hal to bring you to storage to get me a new pencil and journal? I ran out last night it won't take long. I promise. Just have him bring you back here too."

"Sure, Birdy!" Melody nodded, and went over to Hal. He was a pudgy, strange looking man with a huge set of wooly gray sideburns, but he had always been sweet to the kids. He was also huge, making him as good of a temporary bodyguard as any in the orphanage. As Melody and Hal left, she got up and walked over to the group of orphans who had been watching them for the past half hour. Most of them were guys, and looked to all be at least sixteen.

"You guys got nothing better to do than eye up some little girls?" she spoke with an edge to her voice, while moving across the floor; her eyes never halting her glare toward the group. Most of the guys laughed, muttered barely audible insults, or just shook their heads. One stared back, a tall, thickly built man-child with a sour look on his face.

"Your girlfriend saw something last night, we just want some time with her so she can fill us in." he said, monotonously.

"She killed Jake, bro, she has to…"one of the guys in the back yelled, but their alpha male shut him up with a glare before turning back to the thin thirteen year old in front of him.

"Like I said. She saw something, and we need to know what happened. She's gonna tell us." He repeated. Amber sighed. _Boys. Why is it that all the orphans in gangs think that being vague makes them cool? _

"Jake and Selma died last night; if your gang killed them, they'll want to kill Melody. If they didn't kill them, they have better things to do than 'talk' to my friend. So you're going to leave her alone." She was never one to mince words, and more often than not in past incidents she'd use her fists as diplomatic tools than words. She didn't want to take that risk here though, it was practically suicide.

Again, the group broke out in laughter, but the rest of the room had grown silent; small crowds had gathered to see what was going on. It was only a few minutes before the staff would force them all back to their living quarters. For once, she was grateful that everyone was segregated by age, with different rooms for different age groups. _Come on, just a little bit longer _she thought, as the group's presumed leader looked her over, shaking his head.

"Listen you little shit," he laughed, lowering his head. _Well here goes nothing._ "I don't…"

A heavy crack shot through the hall as Amber's steel bowl slammed into the boy's face, knocking him back, onto his friends who sat still in shock. She stood still in front of them, still grasping the bowl; blood dripped slowly into a growing pool beneath it. _If I run now, they'll tear me apart, they'll smell fear. I really wished I held off on hitting him for a bit…where the heck are the staff?_

The boy took a few moments to recover, but sat forward and stood up, wiping the blood off his face. He was probably a good half foot taller than her, and probably was another half of her weight. His first punch was fast, but she had already been ducking midswing, and her bowl collided with momentum to his groin. Grimacing, his second punch landed flush across Amber's face, sending her sprawled across the grimy floor. She had managed to get to her knees by the time the older boy made it over to her. Reaching into her pocket as he lifted her up by her shirt, she slammed the pencil into his forearm with both her hands, at least an inch deep. He howled and recoiled in pain, collapsing backward and falling onto the floor. Amber just fell and slumped against a table. Everything was blurry, and she could hear a lot of loud noises start to fade out as her vision went.


	2. Chapter 2

Amber woke up suddenly, startled. Had someone touched her?  
But there was nobody there, nothing. It was completely dark; no light, no stars. Had the clouds rolled in? She couldn't smell rain in the still air. She shook her head in an attempt to clear her vision but her head only responded with a sharp protest near the rear of her skull.

She turned over, shivering; her body wasn't dreadfully cold, but she felt exposed. She traced her arm around her, searching for a sheet, but came into contact with a hard surface. She paused for a moment, allowing her memory to kick in. _The fight_.

She spun hard to her right and fell off the couch she'd been resting on, crashing onto her elbow.

_Ow_. She thought; wincing at the pain that rippled up her arm, leaving a tingling sensation in tow. _Looks like I'm the only danger to myself right now. Wise up, Amber._

She looked around the room as her eyes adjusted. It was a small waiting room she'd never been in before. The furnishing was minimal. The smooth dark couch she'd been fast asleep on was one of a pair in the room, along with a small corner table between them. The rest of the room was strangely open. No pictures on the walls, no plants, nothing. Two doors were found at opposite corners of the room, the couches set between them.

_One of these ways is an exit. Maybe I can leave without anyone noticing. Mel…_

_Melody_. She'd gotten in a fight and Melody was alone. She'd made a promise to stay with her.  
_If the gang…if no one knew… it's my fault, I need to get back to her! _

Her mind was on fire, wondering how she could slip up and let her new friend down like that. _Not even a day, and I already left her to die! You're brilliant, Amber Shepard, just brilliant!_

She shifted her eyes from one door to another. _Left!_

Slowly but steadily, she tiptoed to the door and slowly edged it open; a quiet but stern voice reached her ears from the other side of the door.

"Yes. Higher ineligible to candidate ratio is imperative. Concern is building over our small population, empty beds. Safer with more bodies…No. Second exposure not needed. Do not pursue this. No. Goodnight, Doctor."  
_This isn't the way out.  
_She slowly started pulling the door closed, trying not to draw attention to the fact that she'd slightly opened it.

"Amber Shepard" she heard from the other side of the door. The voice was familiar, calm. _Definitely the headmisstress' office. This is why you never go left_. She paused, then continued to sneak off, hoping the woman on the other side would forget she was ever there

"Amber Shepard." The words were drawn out, yawning through the air. "Come in."  
Amber sighed, feeling defeated, and walked in. The room was small; the desk that the Headmistress sat at took up most of the width of the room, but there was a chair placed in front of it, and bookshelves along the wall. As she stepped into the room further, she noticed a potted plant to her right with jagged looking bark and long, wide leaves. Looking to her left she noticed a small couch nestled up against the wall, and a familiar redheaded girl was curled up, sleeping soundly.

The frustration and guilt immediately were flushed from her face, and she allowed herself a brief sigh of relief, before sitting in the chair before the Headmistress.

The woman looked exactly the same as she had before, except the lighting was much poorer now; only a small lamp behind the desk managed to give the office a reasonably dim ambient light. _Dim_, she wondered, _dim are my odds of staying in this orphanage after what I did_.

"Amber Shepard. Thirteen years of age." The woman stated matter-of-factly, staring down at her datapad, before raising her head to gaze at the hazel-eyed young girl in front of her. "Perhaps too brave for her own good."  
The woman let those words hang in the air before continuing.  
"Attacked a boy her senior. Broke his nose. Stabbed his left forearm. Currently taken to the hospital. Will be costly." The woman spoke as if reading off a point-form list. _Can't she just talk normally? It's getting annoying.  
_"Yet, perhaps not. Will likely leave hospital and go to gang. Eventually. Less food for us to give out. Less gang members to house. Safer orphanage. Only loose end is you."

The woman peered at Amber intently. After long painful seconds passed, she realized the headmistress was waiting for an explanation. The truth.

"The boys were going to hurt Mel…Melody, ma'am. She trusts me, I…I promised to…"she stammered. The woman's gaze was stifling, and she was scared of being tossed out onto the streets. They seemed unfathomable, dangerous, unaccommodating. There'd be no food to find out there, no warm shelter. Winter was coming, and she'd freeze to death. She could feel the chill run through her bones as she sat there frozen in front of the Headmistress.

"A girl left at night with two others. A girl returned alone. A girl was inconsolable." Amber tried to read the older woman's face, but there was nothing revealing if there was malice or mirth behind it, if anything at all. She just seemed so…_detached_.

"H..how did you know?" Amber asked, unsure of where she was going with this. She shifted around in the chair to get comfortable, as a bead of sweat found a path down her face.

"I listen."

"Headmistress…I think the gangs want to kill her. I know…I know I deserve to be kicked out for what I did but…"  
"A bird need not migrate." The woman noted, a small grin forming on her face. Amber glanced down and noticed he was perching on the chair. _Oh come on, enough with the bird jokes, it's just more comfortable!_

"So, I can stay?" she asked, hesitantly.  
"You may stay, Amber Shepard. However…" the woman paused, taking a sip of tea from her cup as Amber looked on expectantly. "A woman cannot protect you at all times. You must learn your limits. Use words, not fists. Songs, not talons, little bird. Otherwise, reconsideration is likely."

The tall, pale woman fixed her gaze on a small window that popped up.  
"Hal. Please escort the girls. Thank you."

Amber knew she needed to be more diplomatic. Not that she knew that word exactly, but she knew the concept of not always needing to charge in fist first to solve problems. There were some rustled feathers earlier with the fight, and it was likely she had made some enemies simply by making herself a target. _Maybe I made some friends too, though, or gained some respect. If that counts for anything. I'm sure if Mel were awake she'd tell me that birds of a feather flock together or some crap._ Amber looked over at the redhead as Hal carried her down the hall. _Well, at least I kept my promise. She's safe, for now_.

* * *

Amber slept for much of the rest of the day, much to the chagrin of Melody; they wouldn't be eating that day anyway, so there was no real reason to leave the bed. Her head pounded with a gentle, but insistent ache, a physical reminder that she needed to be a lot more careful. Her dreamless sleeps had helped lessen the soreness she felt from the fight, but more than anything she just wanted to avoid how awkward she felt with another person being in her bed. Amber had always cherished her personal space, and didn't know how to adapt to not having it. Ignoring it by sleeping had seemed like as good a plan as any, but she'd wake each time one of her limbs rubbed up against the redhead.

She had been as inconspicuous as she could muster after her hand brushed against Melody's knee, but she promptly found herself being jabbed lightly in the chest by something sharp. Her eyes fluttered open reluctantly, witnessing a determined looking Melody gazing intently at the spot she was poking with a pencil.

"Mel…" Amber groaned, frustrated at the intrusion on her sleep. "What are you doing?"  
The girl's focus quickly shifted to Amber's face as she stopped poking, but her gaze narrowed.  
"Giving you your pencil, you jerkface."  
Amber couldn't help but give a light chuckle at Melody's anger; she was as intimidating as a baby kitten.  
"Not what I had in mind, to be honest." she laughed, unable to suppress it, which only made Melody's face scrunch up even more.  
"I didn't expect to find out you got in a fight either! A journal and pencil. REALLY." The redhead nearly yelled, crossing her arms as a sliver of worry slid across her face.  
"Mel, I had to…"  
"No, you didn't! You could have been kicked out; you could have gotten hurt a lot worse, because you picked a fight with a bunch of older boys! You, a girl! What kind of girl picks fights with boys?" Melody ranted, growing more animated by the moment.

Amber sat up slowly, wiping the sleep from her eyes with one hand, and cupped Melody's shoulder with her other, just resting it there for a few moments. She tried to meet her friend's gaze, but she couldn't will herself to raise her eyes to those green pools.  
"Me, I guess." She replied, reluctantly. _She has every right to be mad at me. I was pretty dumb_. Amber winced, bracing for an onslaught of frustrated anger pitched in her direction. Instead, she got silence.

She could feel the tension hang in the air; it wasn't building, but it was persistently steady. She could feel it in Melody's shoulder, and see it in how she held her body.

Amber opened her mouth to speak, but couldn't will any words out. _What do I tell her? Even if everything turned out, I still broke my promise I guess. I did leave her alone for a bit…_

"Promise me." The words echoed in the air around her, waking her from her thoughts. She felt a hand clasp her arm, as Melody leaned forward to look her in the eyes. The girl's face wasn't scrunched up and angry, nor was it jubilant and wide eyed as normal; it was simply void of emotion. Her emerald eyes were seemingly even paler than usual, lacking their trademark glimmer.

"Promise me," her voice, reduced to a whisper "promise that you won't fight again. I don't want to lose my last friend." Amber's gut churned, hearing the request, but mostly from the last remark.  
"Mel, you make friends easy. I mean, you made me your friend, and I'm about the least friendly person here." Amber noted with some amusement, as a slow grin formed on her face.  
"Jake and Selma were the only ones except you who'd play or talk with me. A lot of people don't like me." Melody spoke, barely audible; each breath more ragged than the last, and Melody's grip getting tighter. "Now Jake and Selma are … and I thought…and I th-thought you…"

_I'm really not good at this stuff_, she thought, not wanting a repeat of the other day's crying session.

"I'm…sorry, Mel. I am." Her words were soft, escaping the nervous grin she couldn't help but hold. "But what did you think I was going to do, fly away on you?" Amber tried to read the fire-haired girl's face, as the girl blinked out a few tears. She saw those green eyes narrow, and the girl threw out an arm, pushing Amber onto her back.

"You're such a jerk, Birdy!" the girl laughed, a few tears still making their way down her cheeks. "God, you're such an idiot. I tell you I'm worried and you make bird jokes."

"Well, you weren't for once in your life." She noted, resting her arms behind her head as she laid back. "Besides, I'm supposed to be the serious one here. Can't have you taking my job." Her eyes caught a smile on the red-head's face, as the girl went back to lightly jabbing Amber with the pencil.

"So how'd you and your little wings take out a sixteen year old boy, anyway?" curiosity filled the girl's voice as she nonchalantly started poking Amber's arms.

"Well, I tried to…Hey! Quit it!" she grunted out, trying to wrest the pencil from Melody's hand to no avail. After a small break, the prodding returned on her legs, but the girl's eager gaze prompted her to continue the story. _Eh, whatever_. "Like I was saying, I went over to them with my bowl and pencil and…"

* * *

Amber hadn't remembered autumn being so magnificent. Upon waking the next morning, she had eagerly resisted Melody's attempts to poke and prod her out of sleep, almost relishing in the redhead's frustration. It wasn't until the late morning sun overwhelmed her with the warmth of its rays that she doggedly left the comfort of her bed, and made her way outside.

It was as if she had stepped into a dream, as if the world outside her window had taken its leave and been replaced with a more fantastic existence. She could hardly see the stone slabs that once laid claim to the yard; they peeked their faces through their new-found blankets playfully as the other children ran around. Where the ground once was, laid a sea of red and yellow leaves; each wave shifting and blowing in the crisp, cool wind. The trees bowed farewell to their companions as the autumn gusts coerced each leaf tumultuously into the last acts of their ballet; the children an eager audience, the sun its spotlight.  
The dance continued all afternoon as the children played gleefully in its presence, fully aware of autumn's last encore before the winter winds would roll in; for a few hours there was no hunger, no fear, no hesitation. The yard had become the year's last stand of exuberance, and for one day, curfew was a lost concept.

"Come on Mel, tell me more!" Amber swatted at the girl, missing from lack of reach as she lay propped up against an old maple. The redhead had been teasing her about spaceships, and some tales which seemed too crazy to believe. She didn't really pay much attention to vids, or news; perhaps if the stories were as exciting as Melody has acted out, she'd have to ask around for gossip or get a staff to fill her in. Either way, it had been a more interesting topic than what food they may be having that week; Amber also enjoyed hearing her usual enthusiasm again. It was plain as day that Melody was in love with the notion of exploring in space, and her eyes would light up when talking about what it might be like.

"Nope!" the redhead giggled, skipping away from her hazel-eyed friend's reach. "If you want to know about space so bad, you should be nicer to me." she noted, with a toothy grin.

"Oh come on, you really expect me not to laugh when you start talking about nose-less space elephants?" Amber sighed. "Or blue squid-headed Medusa people?" The idea seemed preposterous. She has heard there were other species on planets outside Earth, but she expected something more strange. The only tale she had believed was of the Turians, because they sounded nothing like anything on Earth, from the descriptions.

"It's not my fault you don't have an imagination." Melody scoffed, rolling her eyes.  
"Oh yeah? Then what are the space elephants called?" she called out; party inquisitively, but mostly to get a rise from her friend.  
"They're called…El…El…" Melody strained to remember what Hal had called them, but paused upon seeing the girl laying in front of her trying to restrain her laughter, hazel eyes wide in amusement.

"…Elephants?" the girl chortled out, tossing a handful of leaves in the direction of a frustrated Melody. To her surprise, the redhead ignored the leaves and sat down aside her with an audible thump.

"I promise you, Birdy, one day you'll see them yourself." Amber wasn't so sure. She'd never known anything but Earth, and Ottawa wasn't exactly a port town with plenty of ships or alien tourists. _Unless there's some space orphanage…_

"We'll grab a shuttle to a colony instead of another orphanage." She continued wistfully. "Maybe one of the colonies will have purple grass or a green sky, or a new fruit, or something amazing. I can't imagine what it's like, but I want to see it. I'll prove to you there are things like the El…El…Elcor! Things like the Elcor out there." The girls just sat with her back to the tree and their eyes up at the late afternoon sky.

Were this another day, she would have tempered her instinct to hope, but the sky was too cerulean and clear to deny herself. The extravagant show nature had put on before her eyes reminded her that sometimes it was worth the heartache to dream, to plan beyond your means. Her friend's bewitching enthusiasm whispered a secret she hadn't planned on listening to; that survival with nothing waiting in the future was an empty existence. _Maybe one day we'll have the chance to fly away, put this all behind us._

Amber's thoughts raced around the ships she'd been told about; Melody had tried to describe them, but she'd only ever seen shuttles before, and they didn't seem all that common aside from public transport and bringing orphans to new orphanages. _How big are they? How do they fly? How many people are inside? Where do they go? What do they look like? How fast are they? How many different kinds are there? Do other aliens have different kinds? What would they look like? What would those space elephants be like? How would they fly ships with stumps for…_

Her thoughts were interrupted by a shower of leaves over her face and Melody's airy laughter filling her ears. _Thoughts for another day, maybe…for now, payback!_

* * *

Payback was something Amber had expected after the fight, and in a way, it seemed to be waiting in the wings. No matter where she and her bunkmate were, someone had eyes on them. Across the following week she'd taken some time to gauge the public opinion, and while she'd gained a fair bit of support, some of the older crowd were none too pleased. While Mitch, the boy she'd sent to the hospital, wasn't overly popular, he had some friends pledged to the Reds, and some who had planned on pledging.

However, Mitch hadn't returned from the hospital, and Amber had remained; a fact that likely kept their hostilities on the periphery.

Which meant as the week passed, tensions began to fade. That was evident from just taking a glance around the dining hall Amber and Melody sat in, eating their stew. More and more, those piercing stares had turned into curious or passing glances. _At least all this drama's finally dying down. Maybe I'll be able to get my bed to myself for once_. _Or write in my…_

A prodding spoon found Amber's forehead, halting her thoughts where they were. Her eyes traced the journey across the spoon, down the length of the arm, and over to a slightly freckled face whose lips had curled into a devious grin.  
"You're such a birdbrained girl, you know that, right? Finish your food, stupid. I'll meet you back at the bunk."

Melody had been feeling more comfortable being by herself in the past few days, which eased Amber's mind. She'd left the redhead alone for a few minutes each day nonchalantly, to show that nothing bad was going to happen, and it seemed to be rubbing off. They still spent the vast majority of their time together, but both were comfortable being alone in spurts.

Amber reached up, wiping the residue from her forehead, and went about finishing her meal. She had always enjoyed taking her time with her food, savoring its taste in case she didn't have a meal the next day. _This place probably won't be running out of food anytime soon, too. Not with so many empty beds. When are the rest of the kids being shipped in?_ Her thoughts wandered back to her eavesdropping on the headmistress a week or so before. _I just don't get it. There should be more kids here. And what the heck are candidates?_

A loud thump in front of her shook the table and woke her from her thoughts again. Amber looked up and recognized the angry looking boy in front of her. He had been the boy who had basically called for Melody's head in that group of guys, insisting she killed Jake. She warily looked him over; he was sweating a little, his hands were balled into fists on the table, but empty, and while his body language screamed aggression, his gaze hinted at a tiny bit of trepidation.

"Something I can help you with while I finish eating, or are you just going to stare wild-eyed at me?" she knew her choice of words weren't ideal as soon as they spilled out of her mouth. _I really need to be diplomatic here. No fighting, remember? I promised._

"You might think you're tough shit because the staff are protectin' you, but we could see what happens when you're the one sent to the hospital." The boy grunted out, his jaw clenched in anger.

"Staff only protect us kids who aren't in gangs. That's why Mitch isn't back, but I'm still here." She placed her spoon down beside her empty bowl and rested her chin on one of her palms. "Now, you're here for something. I don't think you came here to beat my face in because you'd have done it already. Not that you probably don't want to, it's just we both know it's a bad idea. So tell me, what do you want?"

"That girl of yours killed Jake. She needs to go." The words came quickly and ragged from his mouth. Amber expected as much, but she hadn't really thought how to talk around that. Melody wouldn't hurt a fly, or a mosquito for that matter. She wouldn't kill anyone. _But how do I convince him of that?_

"Why'd she kill him? How? I'll listen, and if you convince me we'll see what happens." She wanted to see his hand, see what cards he had up his sleeve. _Talking's like fighting; you just need to find weaknesses to attack._

The boy's demeanor shifted slightly, a look of confusion washing over his face before he regained composure. "She went with Jake and Selma to find food. She was the only one small enough to fit through the gate and let the others out. They came back and she left them out there, and kept the food. Gangs must have found them and killed them in the night before they could find a way in."

"So gangs killed them?"

"They wouldn't starve to death overnight, and they weren't at the fence in the morning." His face had begun to flush red, slightly.  
"But you weren't there that night. And you didn't talk to Mel. You must have been friends with Jake, but it sounds to me you're just looking for someone to take the blame here." His hand quickly snapped out and grabbed a fistful of her curls_. I figured he'd punch me for that, but I guess I'm lucky._

"She left them to die." His voice shook as the words lurched out his throat. "She killed them. It makes sense!" his grip on her hair tightened, pulling her slightly closer and causing her to lean forward.

"Look, uh…what's your name?" _I may as well give this a shot._  
"Jason." The boy noted, monotonously.  
"Jason, I wasn't good friends with Melody. In fact, I wasn't really friends with her at all. She'd peek her head up at me and we'd say a few words, but we never hung out, really. She'd spend most of her time with Selma and Jake, and they'd go out on searches like that every once in a while." She said softly, raising her eyes to meet the boy's steely gaze. "I wasn't one of her good friends. But when she lost them that night, I was what was left."

Amber paused for a moment to gather her thoughts. _I still don't know all the details, but I can't just let this guy keep thinking Mel's the enemy._

"She cried for almost a full day before I could get any answers out of her. Her, Selma and Jake made it out and they found some food, but it was…already owned by the Reds. They ran, and tried to escape. She saw them kill Jake and Selma." her words hovered for a moment, remembering back a few months to when both were alive. "Jake was always clumsy, he'd always trip over his own feet, you think he had a chance?" Amber asked, filling her voice with her best attempt at remorse. The boy's eyes dropped to the table. "Mel tried to get Selma to hide, but Selma was never that smart. Mel snuck by them when they were…killing the poor girl. You're right, Mel's small, she made it back easily. She came to me and she cried for a full day. Cried from fear, cried from what she saw, and cried over lost friends."

Amber clasped her hands lightly onto the forearm stretched out to her as the grip on her hair opened. _Almost there. If I can just sell this last bit…_

"I don't know if there was more that she could have done that night, but I know that single question fills her head during every waking hour. Hell, when she's sleeping I can hear her going through that nightmare all over again. She's hurting, Jason, just like you. Please don't take your anger out on her. The Reds did this. Not her."

She waited for what seemed like hours before the boy shifted in his seat a bit, returning his arm back to his side while is other hand wiped across his eyes.

"He was like a little brother to me. We've been in three of the same orphanages, and I always looked out for him. And then…God, I know she was his friend, but I just…FUCK!" he yelled, startling Amber as his fist slammed onto the table, a few tears trailing down his face. "Maybe…maybe Mitch got what he deserved. He got me angry. He…I swear when I get out of here I'll kill them all." He vowed, wiping his face with the back of his hand. I'm sorry…I'll leave her alone. Let her know I'm sorry."

Amber gave him a small smile and a nod, standing from the table with bowl and spoon in hand. "I will. And thanks for listening." She said, turning away slightly. "Just take care, eh?"

The boy nodded, still slightly slumped over at the table as she put her bowl and spoon on the stack of dirty dishes. _That went better than expected. That's one less person that hates my guts, now. At least, I hope so._ Amber gazed up at the clock on the wall and flinched. _Ugh, Mel's gonna be pissed at me for taking so long. _She quickened her jog, veering off down the hall toward her quarters, knowing full well the wrath she'd be in for. Still, a smile crept across her face.

* * *

**So the second chapter is officially over! Whoo! I got serious writer's block trying to think up how to do the convo between Shepard and Jason. Took a full three days just to figure out how I wanted to do it.**

**And I'm sorry for not really tossing in the name "Shepard" at all. At this point in her life, she's Amber, her last name means little to her. "Shepard" will come into play at a later time closer to when she decides to join the Alliance, but for now, she's like most civilians…first name basis.**

**I'm going to try to pump chapters out more often, but I'm going to do weekly updates at the worst. That could mean chapters will be shorter at times, but meh. I always aimed for 3500-4500 as a nice average.**

**And thank you thank you thank you everyone who read the story and/or gave feedback You all make me more motivated to continue this than I already was. If you have any feedback, constructive criticism, please , my body can take it :P But if you don't, that's fine. I just hope others are enjoying reading this as much as I am writing it.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry all for the late update. A family member stopped by for a visit so I'm a bit late updating. I also plan on patching up chapter 2's errors where I forgot to italicize. Sorry if those spots caused any confusion.  
We're starting to get into the more hectic stuff now, so I'm not sure how long chapters will be from here on out. I'm still aiming pretty high, but I want to ensure there's decent pacing, something I know I kind of struggle with a bit.**

**This chapter is kind of short, maybe, because I want to leave it at a natural cliffhanger of sorts. I struggled with not keeping this longer, but I felt it sacrificed the flow if I left more in, so… **

**Anywho, enjoy I guess. Thanks to those who've been reviewing my writing, it means a lot to know I have people interested in my story)**

**Also, as usual, some minor swearing here. Nothing big or fancy. Just a warning I guess.  
**

* * *

For the first time in slightly over a week, Amber slept alone in her bunk. They both decided it would be good for Melody to be on her own, even if just one night, though her frustration at Amber for being so late was probably the catalyst for the decision. For about an hour, Amber had been pleased at the girl's decision; she had shown some courage, and was building off Amber's attempts at making her more comfortable alone. For about an hour, she drifted off to sleep in her top bunk, wrapped in her sheet, her head nestled upon her pillow.

Sleep would be fleeting, however. The numbing chills drafting in from the window near her bunk hunted relentlessly for her bare feet as her sleeping form weaved itself out of its cotton shell. Instinctively, she'd reach out her arms to latch onto whatever warmth she could find, but her search was fruitless that night. In her solitude, she could only do her best to sleep until the cool air tickled her toes awake. After having woken up for the fourth time that night, only to see the moon still ascending toward its peak, she began to regret her earlier decision a little.

_Coldest night of the year so far and you decide tonight's the best time for Mel to go it alone,_ she pondered, sighing. _And why is my breath so warm when I'm so freaking cold?_  
Amber pulled at her sheet, untangling it from her left leg and cocooning herself back in it. _Would be nicer with two sheets and a warm body beside me. This building's cold, no shame for wanting to be warmer at night, right?_

"Fuck." She muttered, conflicted at the thoughts running through her head. _ My bed used to be my home, my one place I could be alone and comfortable. I've had colder nights than this before and it didn't faze me. Nine days and suddenly I can't take a little chill? How the shit am I supposed to survive until the end of winter when I can't even take one night in November? God, I hope Mel isn't freezing her toes off like I am._ _Fuck, maybe it's not the cold that's keeping me awake..._

Amber reluctantly pulled her pillow out from under her head and held it close to her chest. "Was giving me a crick in my neck anyway." She grumbled, explaining her decision to no one in particular. Clutching the cool, stiff pillow, she knew she was alone. A few months ago, that would have comforted her, but it felt different now. Each faint breath of air resonated with a dull ache in her core, each moment of silence felt full of creeping malice seeping into her pores_. Is this what loneliness feels like? Am I really this pathetic, so desperate that I need someone by my side at all times?_

Try as she might, Amber couldn't give herself an honest answer. She couldn't explain what was behind her sudden intimacy with Melody, and she couldn't get a handle on what her own motivations were in their friendship. Her arms pulled the pillow tighter against her chest as she lowered her head. _It was nice protecting someone other than myself for a change, and Mel likes being around others and needs someone to amuse herself with, and she was in trouble that night, but…I mean, Mel's nice. She helps me pass time. She has…hope. She's an idiot for it, but it's nice to think we might have a better future ahead. She smiles a lot. Hell, she makes me smile, sometimes, when she's lucky. Is it wrong for a part of me to want this? To want to have a friend? Does that make me desperate? Ugh._

Even in her cocooned state, the frigid air had her body shivering for warmth. _This blows, I'm going to be so tired tomorrow…_her mind trailed off at the thought of the next day_. It would be a good stepping stone for Mel to feel secure on her own. She needs more nights on her own. Hell, she'll probably want more nights on her own, and I'd be proud of her for that. She only came to me because I was the only person she knew that was left. She'll probably go out making new, better friends than me tomorrow. Probably for the best really. I shouldn't really be…_

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of shifting sheets underneath her. Slowly, she sat up, ears perked for any noise, but nothing followed it. _What am I doing, getting all antsy over people rolling around asleep. I do it all the time, no one gives a crap. I just need to…_

"Amber?" the whisper was faint, but the source unmistakable. Amber peeked over to her ladder and found the upper half of Melody's head peering sleepy-eyed at her. The brunette unraveled herself and gently patted an empty space beside her.

"Too cold to sleep?" she asked, as her friend crawled over to her, holding a pillow and trailing her sheet behind her. Amber flipped her pillow back behind her head as the two of them nestled against each other.

"I missed you." The girl in front of her whispered softly, words trailing off as she started to doze off, pulling the sheets up to cover them both. Amber ran her hand through the red-head's hair and held her close with the other, surprised at how warm the girl was. _Tell her you missed her too, you idiot._

"I..." the words caught in the back of her throat, and agonizingly vanished as her face flushed hot with shame. "I'll keep you warm." She mumbled. _Pathetic_

* * *

_April 10th 2168_

* * *

Between the frosty end of autumn and the thawing of spring, life was rather ordinary. Each day would dawn without incident and end as it had begun; aside from the short duration of sunlight and their staggered meal days, there was hardly anything to distinguish one day from the next. It had been a snowy winter, which was a pleasant surprise for most of the children. Often, winters were colder and windier with bursts of snowfall, but mostly just colder and drier. More than anything, for most of the orphans at least, it was nice to see snow on the ground.

It was somewhat bittersweet for Amber, though. _Be a lot longer till it all melts, but at least it'll help more food grow. I just want to go outside again and see leaves on trees_. She hadn't been exposed to a lot of schooling through her childhood. She had learned to read and write quite well at a young age, and had some basic education as to what shapes are what, what objects are what, basic math, but much of her knowledge came from her observations and what she was told, not officially taught. When she was younger, she'd talked at length with a bored staff-member about weather when the orphanage's food stores ran out. A lot of it went over her head, but she absorbed a lot of the easy stuff that ultimately was the most important.

Spring had been fast approaching, with the temperature closing in on the freezing mark. For certain, the official first day of spring had recently passed, but spring usually came late in Ottawa. Though the winds would still pound on the glass at night, the drafts weren't nearly as frigid as February's, and the days had quietly passed into April.

_April…I was born in April. The eleventh, I think. Not that it matters much, aside from letting me know how far I am away from my eighteenth birthday. Soon, just four more years. Four more years until…_

"What'cha scribbling, Birdy?" the redhead was peering over her shoulder curiously. Even after a few months of being around each other, the girl still found it tremendously difficult to read Amber's writing.

"Oh, uh, well…nothing?" she said nervously, stumbling over her words. Amber was never really shy or anything, but enjoyed having her personal time to write down her thoughts. She didn't fill the journals quickly, but she enjoyed reflecting on what little she'd written weeks or months back. It served as a sort of reminder of what she'd learned, and what was important.

Amber scanned Melody's face and noticed the girl's gaze was fixed on one part of her recent entry. Shutting the journal closed, she sat up and motioned to the ladder. Melody looked a little dejected, as if she'd been on the cusp of solving a grand mystery.

"You know, one day I'll figure out how to read all that, and I'm sure you'll be in trouble." Melody said, offering her friend a light punch to the shoulder.  
"Well, until then, there are lots of things we can do." Amber said, setting herself on the ladder. "I thought I heard some thunder a few minutes ago. Wanna head to the lobby and get a good look? Could be the first thunderstorm of 2168!"

* * *

The girls excitedly ran down the hallways, sliding past the traffic from the dining hall until they reached the main lobby. The room, as usual, was large and primarily empty. Amber once assumed this room would be bustling with activity and a major hangout for the kids, but most decided the dining hall was a better spot. _Food's great and all, but I like rooms with a view_. _Lobby is the only place with large, low windows, even if there are only two._

The view outside was one of transition. The light rainfall declared winter had overstayed its welcome, and was working to wash the thick blanket of snow away. _It'll probably ice over tonight, but it's nice to hope it'll melt most of it today. The trees would be bare for another month at least before budding, but it was only a matter of time before they'd be full of leaves again_. She'd always hated winter for being so cold, and for making what little nature she was exposed to so dull. The world would recede into something akin to a colourless form, with everything repainting itself in shades of gray. The sky wasn't as blue as it was during late spring, the grass was dead, and the leaves were a grayish mixture of their old colour, staining the slabs of stone scattered across the yard. The wind was always drier, harsher, and the sun offered no relief. There was never enough food in winter; even in such a lowly populated orphanage, there were some days where they had to skip meal time, and their meals were always half as generous as meals during summer and autumn. Mostly, though, she missed the full trees and the long, clear days.

She wouldn't get that today, but she'd get some progress. The sky was turbulent and menacing, clouds some of the darker grays she'd witnessed during the mid-day. The winds were picking up and she was sure if she'd been outside, the air would feel electric. The low, powerful growl of thunder filled the sky, announcing the approach of spring.

_Winter's pretty shitty. Glad to see nature's finally had enough of it._

As they both enjoyed the proceeding thunderstorm, accompanied by the odd bout of lightning flashing across the expanse of clouds, Amber noticed one of the staff over at the far edge of the yard talking with some people on the other side of the fence. It was difficult to make out, but some wore black and red uniforms of some sort, though the other few seemed ordinary. The conversation wasn't animated, but the staff member's body language spoke volumes. Whatever the discussion was about, he wasn't happy. It ended quickly; the group across the fence got into their vehicle and drove off, while the man slowly lumbered his way to the doors. His shoulders slouched forward and his head faced the ground, bobbing lightly witch each crunching step on the freezing snow.

_Hal? _

Amber nudged Melody and discreetly pointed to the friendly orderly making his way across the yard.  
"What's up with him, do you think?" Amber asked, raising an eyebrow in curiosity. Melody scrunched her face, squinting to see if it was Hal. Her eyesight had never been the best, but it was fine enough to do what she needed, usually.

"I don't know. He shouldn't be out there in the rain, though, I'm sure it's cold as anything out there."  
"Yeah, I'd be running indoors as fast as I could if I were him. He looks like he could use some cheering up." She said, grinning at her companion, whose green eyes lit up at the prospect.  
"Oh, I know! Hal always likes telling us about ships and stuff!"  
"No, I'm pretty sure you're the one who lures him into those talks." Amber noted, laughing at how her friend's smiling face turned into a glare in a matter of seconds.  
"Still, I'm sure he…" Melody started to say before Hal trudged into the lobby. She quickly jogged over to him, trying to get his attention. _Well, I'll try to keep her off his back, I guess_, Amber thought, pacing after her friend.

Melody had a grip on Hal's hand, and was firing off questions about space excitedly, but the more she questioned him, the more pained the expression became on his face. _He really doesn't seem in the mood. Though he normally does like telling us those wild stories about aliens. And space elephants. _

Amber lightly pulled on Melody's free hand, hoping to momentarily distract her. "Mel, I think he probably has work to do. I'm sure…he'll be up for talking later, maybe." She said, trying her best to get her friend to let the large man go.  
She shrugged her shoulders playfully and let go of his hand. "Sorry, Hal. I hope you feel better."

The man just stared at them, his eyes boring holes through them. His breathing was labored, and his thick brows furrowed above his bloodshot eyes; his face was a mask of anguish that the two girls hadn't seen on him before.

_Hal's always a happy guy. What the heck's got him this down in the dumps?_

"I'm sorry…" he said, his voice straining with each syllable. "Girls, I'm so sorry."

Hal walked off like a defeated man, staggering to the Headmistress' office and promptly shutting the door behind him.

_What the heck does he have to be sorry for? He's only ever been nice to us. I don't care if he doesn't tell us stories or anything, that's his choice. Why apologize for it, it's not like we're clingy six year olds or anything, and…_

"Amber, can you let go of my hand? You're squeezing it pretty hard." Shocked at the revelation, Amber quickly loosened her grip, as if she'd been holding something dangerous. Looking down at her hand, she noticed it shaking, lightly. _Why the hell do I feel so on edge right now?_

"Are you ok, Birdy?"

Amber clenched her fist in an attempt to stop the shaking, but she could still feel it, like it was in the air all around her. Like Hal had brought the storm inside with him.  
"Yeah, Mel, I'm fine. Let's go back to watching the storm, okay?" She tried to give a light smile to her friend, but she was much too nervous for it to seem sincere. The glint in Melody's eyes showed a hint of worry, but she went along with it and led her back to the window.

* * *

The evening was dull; the storm only lasted a few hours, and then it was steady rain afterward. Melody had gone off to visit some of the new friends she'd been acquainting herself with lately, giving Amber enough time to go to the dining hall. Normally, at that time of night, the room was empty, so it wasn't a surprise that only a few others were sitting at the tables.

What was a surprise was that no staff were in sight. They had always done cycles, someone always relieved another when they had dinner breaks or they finished their shifts. There were always at least two 'guards' in the dining hall due to its popularity. That night, there were none.

Amber scanned over to the kitchen to see if anyone was behind there. Normally they'd shut down by seven at night, and would be gone shortly afterward; it made sense that they were gone, but it didn't put her any more at ease. The other orphans didn't seem to notice or care.

Quickly, she scribbled down some notes, her confusion on what was going on. It wouldn't help her feel much better, but it would give her some release for her frustration. _I need to know what's going on. First Hal acting strangely, then the staff are missing? She thought back to her walk to the dining hall and couldn't recall any staff near the other living quarters. Where are they? Who…who were those people outside today? _She scribbled her thoughts down furiously before deciding a little exploration was due.

It wouldn't be long before the lights would be shut off for curfew, so she had to hurry. Luckily, the halls were mostly empty; each corner she weaved around she expected to see a staffmember somewhere. As she traversed the orphanage, that expectation turned to hope. Finishing her circuit in the lobby, her hope was fading. Amber decided to take a risk and check the headmistress' office.

Creaking open the door to her personal lobby, she noticed it was very much as she remembered from months before; unlit, two couches nestled in the corner, and a large void everywhere else. A dim light emanated from the Headmistress' door; she knew that orphans weren't allowed to approach her, not without invitation, but Amber had grown worried. The woman had always been nice to her, in her own robotic way. She feared silence more than being berated for intruding on her. Amber slowly crept to the door, each step more tentative than the last. She raised her hand and stared at it for a moment.

_Please._

Her knuckle met with the wooden slab twice in quick succession. The air seemed to simply hang, devoid of answers for long, agonizing moments. Only when a single sharp word sliced through the tension that she realized she'd been holding her breath.

"Leave."

Her lungs yearned for oxygen as she attempted to make sense of her conflicting expectations. She'd wanted to know someone was still left, but she wanted answers. _Something's going on and I'm going to be ready, even if I have to break the rules.  
_She thought of asking the Headmistress a question, but the words died before they could be spoken. _No, that would be one hell of a punishment. Maybe later_.

Amber made her way quickly out of the lobbies and jogged lightly to the storage room. It was always kept under guard, but it never seemed locked. _It's a room full of journals, pencils, and snow shovels. Nothing dangerous, anyway._

As she veered around the corner, the lights shut off. _Curfew, crap. Well, no one's enforcing it, are they? Not my fault._ She knew the way to the storage room and found it unguarded as expected. Fiddling with the rusty doorknob, she was semi-surprised when it popped open. Amber took a few glances around to make sure no one was watching, and snuck inside.

The room wasn't large by any stretch. It only had staff supplies and some pads for students, really, but she decided to have a look around. After her eyes adjusted enough for her to see what she was doing, she began scanning the shelves for anything important. _Something…anything useful…_ Her eyes focused on a small metallic strip hanging on a peg; it was incredibly light and it seemed to be about the size of an adult's forearm. _I think I've seen one of these on Hal before._ She slipped it loosely over her arm and pulled on its end to adjust it. It didn't fit too snug, but it wasn't about to fall off easily. _So dark, I can't see what the hell I'm…_ a stray touch of her hand to the device caused a holo-interface to erupt from it. The shock of the bright light stumbled Amber backward into another shelf of journals.

Regaining her composure, she studied the interface. It was fairly bare, with the time shown and a small array of buttons to choose from. _Never used anything like this…menu seems like a good idea…_ she prodded the air where the button floated, opening a small selection of options. _Hrm, should I try 'Light', 'Scanner', 'Extranet', or 'Comm'? Maybe I'll start from the top._

With the press of the first option, the interface shot out a bright light from where her hand would be. _Okay, that's pretty awesome. I can see in the dark now_. Pressing the scanner function, a small grid came up above her forearm and showed a small red blob on it. As she moved her arm around, the blob moved on and off the grid. D_on't really know the point of that. I guess I should turn the light and scanner off._ Pressing the third option, a small holographic screen popped up above her forearm and had a long empty box, and beside it was a button saying 'Search'. _I don't know what this is so I'm just not gonna deal with it right now._ Closing that, she opened 'Comm', which asked for a 'Channel number' _What the heck is a channel number? I think I'm gonna pass on this too. At least I can light up the night a bit._

Scouring the room with the light function from the interface, she didn't find anything else that was inconspicuous to bring back to her bunk. _I guess it'll just be this for now. Mel's probably waiting._

* * *

Ascending the last rungs of the ladder to her bed, she noticed her red-headed bunkmate moving around frantically before sitting up suspiciously still near their pillows. From the dim lighting, she couldn't really get a good view of the girl's expression, but she didn't seem upset.

"Sorry I was late making it back Mel. Just felt like going for a walk." She said, scratching the back of her head nervously. She knew Mel probably didn't mind, but the girl worried like it was her day job sometimes. "I noticed the staff weren't around and decided to try and find them."

"Yeah, I think they left early today." Melody said, dismissively.  
"But they're supposed to be here all the time, at least a few."  
"Maybe you just missed them?"  
"Well, I did…" her voice trailed off, thinking about the Headmistress_. I don't think I should tell Mel about that. She doesn't need to worry._ "I probably missed them, yeah."  
"Well, now that you're here, I had something planned for earlier, but you weren't here and it's really dark now, but I don't want to wait for tomorrow so..." Amber reached out and steadied her friend.  
"Easy. What's up?" Amber leaned in to get a better look at her friend and noticed the girl practically had 'nervous wreck' written all over her. "Mel, what did you have planned?"

The girl paused for a moment before reaching under the mattress and pulling out some pieces of paper.  
"I…uh…see, I kind of…" she said, stumbling over each word. "I kind of read your journal."

Amber recoiled slightly. _What? But, no one can read my horrible writing_. "Mel, I'm pretty sure that's impossible. Sometimes, even I can't read my writing."

"You're turning fourteen tomorrow." She blurted out, and Amber was sure the readhead's face was flushed. "I still can't read most of it but I made out enough to read tomorrows date and birthday. It's your birthday tomorrow, right?"

"Uh, yeah, I guess so. It's not a big deal or anything, just another day. By this weather, I'd guess it'll be a rainy one. Mel, you could have just asked or something. I don't know. You don't need to try and figure out my writing or anything. Hell, I'll read some of it to you if you want, and…" She was going to continue but Melody had lowered her head enough where her red hair concealed her face and she could hear the distinct sound of Mel holding back sobs. _Oh Mel, you ridiculous goof._

Amber reached out for her friend but Melody squirmed away from the touch.  
"Mel, I'm not mad at you. Surprised you can read my writing, but I'm not mad at all." Amber rolled onto her back and rested her head on Melody's lap, looking up at her upside down face. She could feel her friend shake a little, holding back tears.  
"You promise, Birdy?" she asked, each word shuddering out.

"I promise. You tell me stories of aliens and ships and stuff, I may as well share my journal with you. I don't mind." She reached up and wiped a stray tear away. "You know, has anyone ever told you that you cry a lot?"

Melody choked out a laugh. "You're such a jerk sometimes you know?"  
Amber shrugged her shoulders. "Eh, I can live with that." She said, reaching up to poke Melody in the cheek. "So, you mentioned plans, before collapsing into a babbling mess?"

The only answer Amber received was a hand covering her eyes poorly. "Close your eyes, please!" she heard above her, before using her own hands to cover her face. Soon after, she felt a few pieces of paper dropped onto her lap. "Ready?"  
"Yeah? I guess so?"  
"Okay, now you can look."

Amber unblocked her eyes and let Melody take her hand back. In front of her were a few pieces of paper, but it was hard to make out what was on them. Taking the one on top and bringing it up to her face, she was startled at the detailed drawing in front of her. _I'm no fancy art person, but this is…really good. I think._ "What is it?"

"It's an Elcor! I saw a picture of it on one of Hal's holos and decided to draw it. Do you like it?" she asked excitedly. Amber nodded her head.

"This is really cool. So these are space elephants?"  
"ELCOR."  
"Alright. Well, it's pretty amazing looking. I didn't know you could draw like this, Mel." She said, still surprised at the form of the Elcor and the fact that her friend had kept a talent like this hidden.  
"Well, everyone has their talents. The other pictures are a Turian, a Hanar, and the SSV Hastings, an Alliance ship." Amber scanned over the rest of the pictures, admiring the details and how strange everything looked. She glanced up and saw Melody smiling ear to ear in pride.

"This…must have taken some time. Thanks for letting me look at them." Amber said, passing the pages back to Melody as the girl cocked her head in return.

"They're a gift, dummy. I drew them to give to you. They're yours. It's…a birthday gift."

Amber's head throbbed slightly. _A gift? What the heck am I supposed to do now? When was the last time I was given a birthday gift? Have I ever had one? This is just…complicated. I guess I should thank her, but…now I feel bad. Did her birthday pass? I've never really been given a gift before. This is…_She paused for a moment before embracing Melody in a tight hug.

"Thank you Mel." She said, before slowly unwrapping herself from Melody. "I've never been given a gift before." Melody looked a little shell-shocked, but recovered quickly with a smile.

"It's the least I can do Birdy." She said playfully, sliding herself underneath the covers.  
"Well, you can at least let me know when your birthday is, so I can return the favor." Amber worked her way under the sheets and took her side of the bed. She waited a few moments for an answer to her question, but the redhead beside her had seemingly fallen asleep. _That girl. Sometimes, I swear she does this on purpose._

Amber shifted herself around, resting her arm under her pillow as usual, and let her thoughts drift to dreams of colony life. _What would it be like to live with Elcor, or Turians? What food do they eat? Do their planets have blue skies and green grass? Do…_

Amber's thoughts were stifled by a massive explosion ripping through the orphanage, toppling over her bunk-bed and numerous others onto their sides. Amber and Melody's bodies crashed to the floor violently; the force propelling them into the concrete wall with an audible crack.

Amber struggled to get to her feet, but tumbled over onto her side after her failed attempt. Everything was blurry and muffled and dark.

Everything but the screaming. And the flames.


	4. Chapter 4

The room was immediately strange, yet familiar. Smoke and dust relentlessly infected the air as the room was washed in a thin orange haze. Embers billowed in the dead air in sync with each wafting flame, each anguished cry. Orphans clutched each other as they lay broken on the floor; some bodies too bruised and damaged to move, others too mentally frail to lift themselves up and apart from whatever shared comfort they could find. Perhaps the warmth of the fire played a part in the paralysis. The quarters were beautiful on fire; the bedframes shattered and twisting upward, having tumbled in on themselves from the impact. Parts of the ceiling had broken off and collapsed, smothering much of the southern portion of the room. Wild flames and dark smoke flooded in from the third floor where the damage had seemingly originated from.

As Amber's eyes adjusted, she knew she had seen this once before. She had seen the faces of condemned children trapped beneath what were their homes, their sanctuaries. She had heard their terrified screams before, arms outstretched toward their friends in a last gasp of courage or selfishness before the flames or suffocation took them. Amber never had time before to discern which it was; lying collapsed against the wall, she pondered whether or not she'd be given the opportunity tonight.

_Window's too high up to reach and my entire body aches. It's…why is it so hard to breathe?_ Amber let out an audible moan, coughing as she found herself short of breath. _This was a nice orphanage. Fed us stews and soups instead of nutrient paste. Always hated the paste. Liked the journals too, they helped keep my mind straight. And Mel…_

Amber slowly urged her body to angle her head to the side, wincing as the stiff, stressed muscles complained. She caught sight of a dark, scraped kneecap; raising her head, she found Melody using the wall to steady herself in her attempt to stand. _It'd be so easy to just lay here. My whole body is sore and tingly. There's no one to put the fire out. Why…_

Amber drifted out of her thoughts, noticing Melody trying to pull her up with little success. _Why is she making this harder than it needs to be?_

"Come on Birdy, we need to go." Melody's voice was hoarse from the smoke, and would be worse by the end of the night. She leaned down toward Amber and locked eyes with her. "You promised to keep me with you. Well, I'm leaving." Melody locked her hand onto Amber's forearm, coughing. "I don't know about you, but I plan to keep my promise too."

_Space. Colonies. Ships. The Space Eleph…Elcor._ Amber glanced at her surroundings. The impact had knocked much of the beds to one section of the room, and the collapsed ceiling had blocked off much of the rest, but there was a path she could make out toward the door. The storage room wasn't far from there, and there would be some first aid and other supplies. _Can we do this? Is it worth the risk?_ She thought, looking up at Melody's soft green eyes. _There's still time. There's still hope._

As if reading her mind, the redhead spoke quietly, her eyes smiling down at her. "There's always hope, Amber."

She grasped Melody's arm with both her hands and, using the wall and her friend as leverage, pulled herself to her feet. "I was kind of wishing I could just fly out, you know?" Amber said before choking out a strained cough, a small grin forming on her face. Melody let out a giggle, but it was clear the smoke was getting to her, as it led into a coughing fit.

Amber took small steps forward, leading Melody toward the exit. Each step was lighter than the last, each lashing flame duller and cooler than those before, as they brushed past the carnage. Amber didn't allow her gaze to fall across the dead and dying; she knew she had no answer for them, and knew that survival was a brutal game. Her mind shuddered at the reality of their situation as they neared the doorway. _Even if more than just us escape, this is their last day as children. No one's waiting to save us, to help us._

The hallway wasn't in much better shape, with debris piled across the width in both directions from collapsed walls and ceilings. Amber led Melody down the corridor to the stairwell, silently praying that the storage room wasn't as much of a mess. The ceiling groaned in agony, dust and small pebbles raining on their heads as the pair limped their way down each step. Her body's ache had lessened, but the tingling she'd felt before was nearly overwhelming; each step felt as if she were made of pins and needles. _At least it doesn't hurt, it's just really uncomfortable._

Amber breathed as much of a sigh of relief that she could, given the amount of soot she'd inhaled; the main floor, while somewhat damaged, appeared to be in good shape. The girls made their way through the halls, cautiously glancing upward every few steps in expectation that the ceiling would break on them, but their journey to the storage room was unmolested. The main floor was ghostly with the dust swirling through the air, and with no other bodies in sight. The living quarters had all been on the second and third floors, so it made sense that there would be less children escaping, but they hadn't seen or heard anyone since departing their room.

Amber nudged the storage room door open, finding the room mostly in the same shape it had been in nearly an hour before. _It's still really dark in here. I…Wait…_ She grazed her hand across the strip on her arm and activated the 'light' function, illuminating the room for the most part. _Glad I picked this up, I needed a little good luck tonight. _

Amber and Melody split up and scanned over the room; one shelf had been knocked over, but it was fairly bare, carrying pencils and a few small tools. The redhead called Amber over to a corner of the room, revealing a small first aid kit.

"I won't lie, Mel. I don't know how to sew or anything, so…" Amber turned away, letting out a cough. "…if you need stitches for your knee, I probably won't be able to help."

Melody opened the case and found a small book, needle and thread, three small bottles, and a few packets of a clear substance. "I think we should take this with us, Birdy." Amber simply stared at her friend. _Glad she came to the same conclusion. I really didn't want to have to talk her into going out on our own._

"I think we'll need it out there. Put it near the door, and keep looking for anything useful." Amber noted, returning to looking around. The room, as before, was fairly standard. The circumstances had changed, so more of the equipment had come to her attention. She limped over to the coat rack and pulled two large winter coats from it. _They're way too big for us, but they'll form a nice enough cocoon if we can haul them out of here._ As Amber brought them to where the first aid kit laid, she nearly bumped into Melody, who was carrying small cloth bundles. Amber shot her a confused look.

"We're going to need extra clothes, you know. We can't carry much, but an extra pair or two will really help, I think." Melody's voice sounded like gravel, she needed something to drink badly. They both did.

"Good thinking, Mel. I'll try to track down some water before we get out of here. I…"

The sound of a loud crash above them shattered their conversation and visibly shifted the ceiling. _Whatever crashed into the 3__rd__ floor probably just fell to the second. We need to go. _

"We've got meds, we have coats, clothes, this light thingy, what else do we need?" Amber asked, hurriedly. Melody pondered over that question for a few moments, visibly thinking of how to say what she wanted in as little words.

"Food? Boots? Gloves?" she said, succinctly. Amber moved quickly near the rack and scanned the shelf. _There must be other winter clothes here, there has to be!_ _Maybe inside this box…no. Well, maybe in here…_ Amber spent a few minutes flipping boxes off a nearby shelf, knocking tubes of strange substances onto the floor, before finally coming across a small stash of well-worn gloves. They fit loosely on Amber's hand, but would be warmer than nothing. She snagged two pairs. _No boots in storage I guess. Probably aren't shared, the guards probably had their own pairs. Food will be a problem too, they don't store any here. It used to come in daily, with the cooking staff. _

Amber made her way over to Melody, who was packing as much as she could into the pockets of the coats and the small first aid kit. After quickly scanning the room, she tugged on her friend's sleeve.  
"Come on Mel, let's get you something to drink."

* * *

The main floor was in visibly worse shape upon exiting the storage room. The crash had been worse than expected, and had caused a lot of debris to collapse onto the first floor, as the flames continued their occupation of the building. Amber led Melody slowly around much of the more jagged debris and the flames, toward the water fountain in the main lobby. Despite the damage to the building as a whole, the pipes underground were unharmed, and the fountain still functioned. Melody eagerly gulped down the cool water, drying her chin with her sleeve as she finished. Amber took a few quick gulps and froze. The room was crackling, both from the flames and under the strain of whatever had done away with the upper levels, but she swore she could hear something outside. The crunching of snow. _Voices_. She signaled to Melody and pointed to the front of the room.

The girls quietly snuck behind a fallen lump of debris near the main entrance, peering out from behind it. Two men wearing red and black jackets were cautiously moving around the yard, appearing to survey the damage. Some curse words were audible, and the voices sounded a little panicked. _They're not really walking toward the entrance… If they're here now, more will come later, for sure. Maybe we can sneak out when they aren't looking…_ There were no vehicles parked near the gate, or shuttles in the yard, so the men had likely came on foot, alone. Both girls peered outside to gauge their plan of escape. The gate was open, but was far away. While it had stopped raining, the chill of the night had begun to freeze the wet snow into ice. _Hard to run on, and it's a long run, with nothing to hide behind. At least it's not freezing rain, though. Those men will be faster than Mel and I…._ _If we can get out of the yard to the alleyways, Mel can probably find us a place to hide. Maybe. We just need a distraction…_

Amber waited a few moments for the men to disappear from sight, having walked off to their right. _Risky, but as good a chance as any_. She thought to herself, scanning the supplies they decided on. _We need all of this. God, we're going to need to be lucky._

"Mel," she whispered, while slowly rising. "When I say run, we need to rush to the gate. Do you know any decent hiding spots nearby?"  
Melody slowly cocked her head to the side, before nodding quickly. "Yeah. I think... It's been a while. I didn't go out all winter."

"Well let's hope it's as good as you remembered." Amber snuck over to the main doors. _This is it. Wish this tingling would go away._

"Run!"

* * *

The two girls burst open the main doors, dashing across the frozen, half melted snow beneath them. The air was colder than expected, the usual nightly winds blowing them around slightly as they made for the gate. For a few moments, Amber felt untouchable. Despite her body feeling like it was home to thousands of tiny pins and needles, her senses felt heightened; each patch of ice was obvious to her, each gust of wind fully expected, each muffled crunch of snow beneath their feet amplified. But then she could hear another pair far behind them, followed by an angry shout which the wind muffled as the girls ran on.

"Don't look back Mel, just keep running!" Amber was surprised that the redhead could sprint so quickly, saddled with a coat and the first aid kit; Melody had kept up in a dead heat with Amber from the start and wasn't looking the least bit winded. _Maybe I underestimated her a bit. _

The gate was just ahead, but their pursuer was gaining ground quickly, each step crushing the icy foundation beneath him. As they rounded past the gate and into the street, a shout rang out behind them.

"You wanna live, you'll stop running you little shits! Maybe I won't beat some goddamn sense into you!" The voice was livid and deep. More importantly, it was close behind. Melody led Amber down a small alleyway, jumping some spilled garbage as she slipped into it. The alley was short, mostly dry, and branched off in a few directions. The redhead sprinted forward and made a left into the second nearest alleyway, Amber and the older man following hastily behind her.

Amber felt herself slip mid-step, stumbling on a patch of ice as she rounded the corner; she regained her balance quickly but Melody was far ahead of her, unaware. Just as she was stepping back into a sprint, a force from behind bowled her into a nearby wall, her right shoulder taking the most of the impact with a nauseating crunch. Suddenly, that full body ache from the crash returned; her legs were wobbly and uncertain, forcing her to stumble forward as she tried to regain her footing. Amber looked down the alley. Melody had stopped and was staring at her, but Amber's vision was a little blurry from the impact. _She needs to get out of here._

"Run, Mel! You…" Amber's hoarse yell was interrupted by a sharp impact to her midsection, sending her tumbling across the cold, rough pavement. Her body strained for breath, forcing bloody coughs out in hope that she could get a little air. She felt a foot press onto her back firmly, keeping her flat against the ground, spitting out blood. Her breath caught as she lazily opened her eyes.

_Mel's closer now._

"That's it. I'll kill your friend here if you don't get the fuck over to me right now, you ginger piece of shit!" The man above her said, menacingly. It was clear he was a little out of breath. _She can absolutely outrun him. Why isn't she running?_

Amber gathered what little air as she could and gasped out "Go now!" The pressure on her back was eased for a moment before the man dealt another sharp kick to her ribs. Amber's body collapsed as she slid across the alley, her face scraping along one side and bloody saliva oozing from her mouth. She lay on the pavement helplessly watching Mel slowly step closer to the thug, who had drawn his pistol and was casually looking it over. Despite the pain coursing through her body, she knew the thug would only do the same to her friend, if not worse. Amber wanted to feel the pain of her failure. She wanted to feel sorrow for what she'd gotten her friend into. She wanted to feel pity for herself over her injuries. She tried, but she couldn't.

She only felt anger; it built with each labored breath, each spatter of blood she coughed out, each aching limb as she forced herself upright. Each pained memory of her past fueled her; each pleasant thought of her friend cleared her head. Each vague, naïve hope for the future turned those pins and needles into electricity. _I made a promise._

The thug hadn't noticed the frail, bloody brunette rise; his focus was too sharply on the redhead in front of him, just slightly out of reach. "Lay that junk on the ground, now." He said sternly to the young girl, who knelt and began unloading the pockets. Smiling, he raised his arm, readying a pistol whip to the gullible girl, but halted the motion midway as a glimmer of blue caught his eye. The man turned his head slowly, the look of confusion never leaving his face as the blue-engulfed form in front of him tensed, and disappeared.

Melody startled at the explosion, scrambling backwards as fast as she could muster. There were bricks scattered across the impact zone, a thick cloud of dust and clay obscuring the damage in front of her. It was only when she felt a drop of liquid hanging off her nose that she looked down at herself and her surroundings. Her hand cupped her mouth as she screamed; the alleyway was slick with blood.

She steadied herself for a moment before slowly creeping forward into the hazy aftermath. The bricks lining the wall had crumbled at the impact, exposing the cement foundation through an oval imprint where they once were. Her eyes peered across the carnage and found the thug looking back at her, confused and soaked in blood. Her eyes slowly shifted downward and quickly she turned away, gagging at the sight of the mutilated corpse beneath. His ribs and collarbone were smashed and decorated the bloody debris. She looked over to where Amber had collapsed and noticed she was missing; only the coat remained.

"Oh god. Oh no, no, not Birdy…" she pleaded, choking away her sobs. She reluctantly glanced back at the rubble, noticing the dust had mostly cleared. Her breath caught as she spotted a small foot buried beneath a brick. "No, no, not again, please!" she cried, crawling toward the debris. Kneeling down she carefully removed a portion of brick at a time from atop her friend. Each brick revealed more of Amber's gaunt frame; intact, but bloody and likely broken.

Melody stripped off her coat and as gently as she could, lifted Amber onto it; not knowing how severe her friend's wounds were, she dragged her from the wreckage. Quickly gathering Amber's coat and her other supplies, she continued gently hauling the damaged body out to the nearest street. Amber had a pulse; weak, but it was there, and her breaths were laboured. Melody's mind momentarily trailed back to the storage room, remembering the device Amber had on her forearm.

"Hal had one of these!" She said, frantically opening up its interface, selecting the 'Comms' option. Melody entered 9-1-1 and quickly shut off the call, not knowing what to do next. She hoped ambulances still tracked Omni-tools during emergencies. Wiping the tears from her eyes, she gingerly laid down beside Amber, careful not to touch her, and covered the both of them with the extra coat.

"This is going to be the worst birthday celebration ever." Melody whispered to Amber's unconscious form. "I'll have to hold off on the fourteen birthday beats I owe you. I hope you don't mind, Birdy."

As the sirens drew closer, she laid back, closed her eyes, and imagined they were on Eden Prime, stargazing. For a moment, she could almost believe it.

* * *

**Ughhhhhhhh This chapter took forever to write, despite how short it is. Well, it didn't help I cut out some material for the next chapter, but that "fight" scene... That was hard to write. It wasn't even that brutal, but those poor girls :(**

**That's more or less why this took as long as it did. I learned I freeze up when I subject my characters to terrible pain. Sorry about that. Anywho, the next chapter is about 2000 words in, so I'm hoping, if I can get through my schedule quickly tomorrow, that I can work away on it. Maybe get the next one out by the weekend. I'm hoping.**

**As usual, thanks to Helljumper 1337, Exar Kun IV, PMC65, Theodur, gearseffect and Salser, who have humbled me with their feedback :)**

**I hope you enjoy! As usual, feedback is deeply appreciated, and any constructive criticism will brighten my day tenfold. Have a good Wednesday!**


	5. Chapter 5

Springtime had always surprised Amber with how refreshingly comfortable it was. The sun would infuse the cool winds with warmth enough to hint at what was to come, so everyone could savor the wait as the world slowly grew more vibrant. The rain would grace the world with the inevitability of life; each drop feeding into the earth, each organism savouring its meal. It seemed as if all of nature would wait patiently with bated breath for all that green to present itself above ground, heralding the true emergence of Spring as Amber saw it.

Amber sat up from the soft, grassy spot she'd been laying on, her legs slick with dew. _I must have napped, I guess._ Gazing around, she found herself in what she knew to be a meadow from the books she'd read and vids she'd watched as a child. The field of green stretched far to the horizons around her, with tall pines and spruce far off in the distance; it was beautiful in its simplicity. The cheerful call of songbirds flit through the calm breeze, and the light rustling of leaves filled the remaining silence. _That's odd, I can't see any trees or birds nearby. _

Amber twisted her body to the side in an attempt to look behind her, but a ripple of pain shot up her side, her body tensing as it fell back to the ground. _What the crap?_ Breathing slightly heavier now, she pushed herself backward slowly using her legs; each push making minor progress as her midsection began to strain from sitting up. Dropping her body flat to the ground, her gaze met the periphery of a tree's canopy. It wasn't full by any stretch, likely a very young red oak, but it was spectacular against the clear, cerulean sky. She couldn't see the birds, but their gleeful chirps seemed just out of eyesight.

_This is nice, just laying here. I need to bring Mel here sometime…_Amber thought, letting her body relax as she watched the leaves above her wave in the wind. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed something out of place. _Is that leaf…a lot lighter than the others? It almost looks yellow…_

The wind picked up, cooling slightly in its gusts, the one suspect leaf now rustling out of view. Amber could hear something off in the distance, nearly inaudible, as her body started to ache. It was different than the birds who were still singing away, its low hum vibrated though the air.

Amber once again tried to shift herself into an upright position, but white-hot pain ripped through her torso instead. Her eyes clenched shut instinctively, and her body forced out an unintelligible groan from the agony. Momentarily, it felt as if she was being ripped apart, but a soft hand on hers dulled the sensation, calming her enough to drop back onto the moist grass.

As her back made contact, she noticed the ground was firmer than before, the wind and birdsongs were gone, and the vibrating hum was overbearing.

"Nurse!"

The voice was familiar, and close. As steps rang out toward her, she opened her eyes and found herself gazing into eyes as green as the meadow had been, glistening as the grass had in the morning's dew.

_Mel?_ She heard some activity off to her left, and soon afterward felt a cool substance enter her arm, sending a painful chill through her body. As her eyes focused, and she gained her bearings a little, she couldn't help but make her thoughts audible.

"Where am I?" she asked, confusion knit across her face. _I was just in a…a dream, you idiot. You've never been to a freaking meadow, ever._ She let her gaze stray across the room. It was small, but was whiter than any room she'd been in. There was an open window behind Melody to her right, birds faintly singing away. The female nurse to her left typed away on her datapad, briefly meeting Amber's gaze.

"You're in a hospital, sweetie." The nurse noted softly, placing the pad on a counter nearby before returning to the bedside. "You got yourself pretty banged up, so you're going to have to rest here until you get better, alright?" The woman seemed nice enough_. This is the last place I expected to be. How did I even get here? Last thing I recall is…_

Her mind strained at the thought, and the throbbing pain throughout her body wasn't making it easier. _I was running away from the orphanage with Mel and I slipped a bit…Then… _Amber froze for a moment, remembering being on her stomach, pleading at Melody to run away from the man who'd chased them down. She touched her ribs and regretted it immediately, wincing in pain. _But he beat me up. How are we both here?_

Amber shifted her gaze back to Mel as the nurse left the room. She opened her mouth, starting to ask what happened, but her words died in her mouth. Melody was still leaning over the bed rails; her eyes silently streaming tears down her freckled cheeks, looking at Amber as if she were going to vanish at any moment.

"Mel, what's wrong?" Amber asked, trying to hide the pain in her voice as much as possible. _We escaped last night with our lives, she should be thrilled!_ Melody sniffled, wiping her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater.

"Th..the nurse told m..me that..that…" Melody struggled to speak but her sobs overcame her, burying her eyes in her sleeve. Amber wanted to reach out to her, but her right shoulder wasn't in any condition to do so from the deep ache emanating from it. Amber patted the left side of her bed with her good arm, trying to get her distraught friend's attention.

"I'm going to be here for a while Mel, so…just…let it all out. Take your time." The medication had started to sink in, Amber noticed, and it was working quickly. The pain was beginning to dissipate. Melody unperched herself from the railing and trudged over to the other side of the bed, trying to control herself with each step. Amber nearly laughed when she saw Melody's face scrunched together, trying not to tear up. Melody caught the nervous grin on the brunette's face and lowered her chin. She knew Amber got uncomfortable when she cried, and had tried to rein herself in during the past months.

Amber reached out her hand as much as she could, and Melody quickly clutched it, giving a labored sigh.  
"I thought you were dead." Melody's words were barely a whisper. Her red locks hung over her face, hiding her eyes as she started to move away.

Amber quickly grabbed her friend's wrist, preventing her from leaving her side. _She's probably still scared stiff, especially after last November… And I've been lying here half-dead for days, for all I know. I still don't even know how we got here, I mean… We get chased by some maniac, running for our lives, and…I can't remember how we even got here. Mel was on her knees and… _Amber's face dropped, and she again patted the small empty crook beside her. "Mel, I'm fine." Amber did her best to sound soothing, but she knew the worry was audible in her voice. "I don't know how we got here, but…that man…please tell me you…"

Melody quickly cut her off with a confused look. "I called an ambulance, Birdy." Relief spilled across Amber's face, each word more comforting than the last. _Oh thank god! I would have…I…wait, how did she call an ambulance? What happened to that thug? _

"Come on up here, Mel. A request from the birthday girl." She said, offering a smile instead of a pat on the bed, as her arm was starting to feel a little too numb. Her friend's face fell, her brow furrowing as tears once again started to form. _Mother of Christ…_

"Did I say something wrong?" Amber asked, confused. _I can get being upset at thinking I was dead, but a bed shouldn't scare her, even if it's as hard as a rock._

Melody did her best to quell the tears, "The n..nurse told me… that I…I can't hug you."

Between the sight of Melody trying not to openly weep, and the seemingly absurd statement, Amber couldn't restrain her laughter."Did she actually specifically say you couldn't hug me?" she said, doing her best to tame herself so her friend wouldn't feel bad. She knew Melody was sensitive about it.

Melody simply nodded.

"You know, Mel, you cry a lot. I don't really get it, but…that's you. And I really don't help by making you worry so much, so …maybe I'll try to get better at running or something. Anyway, you're emotional and that's fine by me. It's kind of strange, but awesome at the same time. I don't want to see you all serious-faced when we get to whatever colony we'll live on, I want to see you and your big goofy smile." Amber noticed Melody's lips twist into a smirk. "And Mel, I can barely feel anything, so if you want to hug me, now's the time, before I fall asleep."

Melody hesitated for a moment. Amber had expected her to bounce into the bed as usual, but she gingerly slid onto the bed, wrapping her arms gently around Amber's neck. "I'm sorry your birthday sucked, Birdy." Melody nuzzled her head against Amber's good shoulder.

"It's not so bad. I'm alive," Amber said, leaning into Melody's hug as she yawned. "And you're here to celebrate it with me." Amber felt the hug tighten slightly, but she could barely feel anything now. "Mel, I gotta take a nap, but…last night…can you tell me what happened when I wake up?"

Mel nodded her head, sniffling. "You're coming back, though…right?"  
Amber laid there, confused and in the process of drifting off to sleep. _Where can I even go, in this shape?_ She did her best to wrap her left arm around the redhead beside her, doing a distinctly poor job. Her struggle to keep her eyes open swiftly ended.

"I'll always come back, Mel." She said, groggily, as she drifted into slumber.

* * *

"How'd you get your injuries…uh… Jane?"

The balding heavy-set man pacing at the end of her bed was an unexpected intrusion, waking her up long before the sedatives had worn out. The pain was only a dull ache, but Amber swore the full edge of the pain was preferable to the police officer asking her the same set of questions over and over.

"For the third time, I don't know. I just woke up here. And my name isn't Jane." Amber said, frustrated particularly at the man's insistence at calling her Jane. _If he's trying to win me over, he's doing a terrible job. At least Mel didn't tell him anything either._ Amber shifted her head over to her friend, who was sitting in a vacant chair near the window, looking tremendously bored. _Glad she knows not to trust this idiot._

"There was a man found in the alleyway nearest to where the paramedics found you. He was…uh…severely injured…" the man's face was contorted slightly, trying to find the right words. _He probably doesn't talk to a lot of kids. Why can't he go away and leave me alone?_ Amber knew her temper was starting to flare, but she couldn't help herself. She was stuck in a bed unable to walk away while the man reworded his questions for the fourth time.

"You used dead last time. Just say dead. I've seen dead bodies before, so I'm not some clueless child." Amber said, anger slowly seeping into her words. The man shifted, slightly taken aback, before he cleared his throat and started over again.

"So, there was a dead man found in the alley where you were found near. Did you see what happened to him? Were you involved with him in any way?" Amber rolled her eyes, her body tensing up.

"No. I didn't see what happened to him, and I wasn't involved with him. Can you please stop asking me these questions? This is, like, the fourth time you've asked that, and you're just wasting your time. I don't remember what I was doing last night, I don't remember how I got here, and I didn't come across a dead man last night."

The man huffed, his face flushing. "Look, Jane," he noted, putting extra emphasis in the name. "I'm trying to be nice, but I need answers. You're not in our records, neither is your friend, and you two won't tell me or the hospital staff either of your names. Something happened last night that injured you, and very likely killed that man in the alleyway. We have a team going over the scene and I'm sure they'll find something linking the three of you, so why don't you tell me right now before things take a turn for the worse?"

The man tilted his head toward Melody. "You two seem pretty attached. The little redhead's bill of health is clean, so she's free to go. Technically she shouldn't even be allowed in here, but we made a special exception. I don't want to have to call Child Protection Services and have her taken away just yet…"

Amber's eyes widened. _What the hell is 'child protection services'? Is this guy actually threatening us? If he touches Melody, I'll…_

"That won't be necessary, Officer." A deep voice rang out from the back of the room, its host partially hidden behind the stout man blocking her vision. Amber noticed Melody jump off her chair and approach the man. _What's going on?_

The man turned to face the new guest, his words stumbling out of his mouth. "Look Lieutenant, I'm in the middle of a…talk…with the young lady…"

"I didn't know it was standard operating procedure to interrogate and threaten little girls, officer. I believe she's made it clear that she's answered your questions." The new guest stepped closer to the bed. He was a tall man, and looked strong from his posture and build; his skin was much darker than hers, and it complimented the navy blue uniform he wore. His face wore a light smile as he looked in her direction. _Looks can be deceiving, Amber. Just because Mel trusts him doesn't mean he's good for it. Treat him like any other cop for now._

The officer shuffled away his datapad into his coat, giving a sour look to the other man. "You know, Lieutenant, you don't have jurisdiction here."

"No." the tall man responded quickly. "However, given my rapport with the Ottawa chief of police's son, and my standing in the Alliance, you'll find I may have a bit of pull. Good luck on the case, officer."

Once the officer passed into the hallway, Melody let out a sigh of relief and gave the man her trademark smile. He returned it with an amused grin, before moving over to Amber's bedside.

"Can someone tell me what's going on? I mean, thanks for getting the jerk out of here, but I don't know who the heck you are." Amber asked, trying to appear calm. The whole situation had her a bit flustered. The officer had woken her before Melody could give a recap on the previous night, so it had been nearly an hour of confusion and frustration. _I've never been big on surprises, and this sounds like it's gonna be a big juicy one._

"My name is David Anderson, I'm a Lieutenant from the Alliance. I was here last night visiting a friend of mine when…well, she can probably tell it a little better than I can, I'm sure I'd bore you." He said, adding a bit of laughter as Melody scrambled excitedly up onto the bed rail.

"I called the ambulance and it was a shuttle like the one that…uh…" Melody paused, giving an unsure look to Anderson and then to Amber. She'd seen that face before. _She's probably the worst liar in history. Not a smooth start, Mel._

"I've seen shuttles before. We see them all the time in the streets." Amber said monotonously, trying to bail Melody out.

"Yeah, anyway, they grabbed us and our stuff, and whooshed us away and it only took a few minutes to get here because they had the sirens on and we were going really fast! The shuttle had windows, and the city looks so cool at night from that high up! You should have seen it! Anyway, they brought us in on stretchers, but I didn't really need one because I only scraped my knee a bit, but they told me it was for safety, but they started taking you down this other hallway, so…"Melody paused, drawing in another deep breath. Sometimes Amber wondered how the two of them were ever friends. She'd been a solitary, quiet, serious girl just trying to scrape through the system, and Melody was a social, motor-mouthed, red-headed ball of exuberance. Amber shook her head slightly in amusement; she couldn't help but find her friend's mile a minute pace slightly endearing.

"…so I got off the stretcher and ran after you of course, but the hospital people yelled after me, but they were slow and I caught up. They kept saying you needed emergency care, and I knew it was an emergency, but I couldn't just leave you alone or anything, so I yelled at them to let me stay with you, but they still said no."

"Did you turn on the waterworks?" Amber asked, her hazel eyes betraying how oddly funny she found the story so far. The man was right, it was better that Melody told it. The redhead shot a glare at Amber in response.

"It wasn't funny! Why are you even asking?" Melody's face flushed at the admission. "Anyway, I decided they're not going to put you in some stupid old bird-cage, but these nurses came out of nowhere and surrounded me, and kept trying to tell me you'd be fine, but I…they didn't see what I saw, and I thought you were dying, so I screamed and punched and I think I hit a nurse's elbow. It hurt my hand."

Amber gave out a chuckle. "My brave warrior princess!" she said as sweetly as she could bear, offering Melody her kindest smile. Melody knew Amber had a tendency to laugh and joke when she was uncomfortable, so she knew she wasn't truly being mocked._ It'd be nice for her to say thanks, though, every once in a while_. Melody thought to herself.

"So there I was, surrounded, and this guy," she pointed at Anderson behind her with her thumb. "Charged over and argued with one of the nurses for a bit. I tried to sneak off, but he brought me to a chair and had a nurse fix my knee up. It didn't take long, and I squirmed a little, because the gel was really cold. Anderson started telling me stories, because he's in the Alliance, and I kinda lost track of time. I wanted to leave but I couldn't see where you'd gone, so I figured I'd…well…" Melody paused, and started wringing her hands, her gaze averting from Amber.

Anderson wasn't sure whether he should jump in and finish the story, as the girl in front of him seemed to have gotten slightly more worked up as she'd gone on. As he started to open his mouth, the bed-ridden girl reached up and gently cupped the redhead's right cheek, whispering something inaudible which seemed to lift the girl's spirits. Still weak from the sedation, Amber allowed her arm to fall back to her side, as her friend continued after a moment of pause.

"I, uh, was worried, and he told me he'd make sure I'd see you…I knew he was an Alliance officer so I figured I could count on him. He went away for a minute or two and came back with the nurse he'd argued with before, and when the doctors were done with you I was allowed to go see you. Some of the doctors made a fuss about it, but I don't know why. It's not like I was going to go beat you up or anything."

Amber thought back to when she'd broken her arm when she was 7, and had to go to the hospital. _That was so boring, just lying there with a cast on my arm. But…other hurt kids like me…their company had to leave when it got dark or something. Maybe…_

"I think it has something to do with visiting hours or something." Amber muttered out, uncertain if she was correct or not.

"That played a part, but there was a little more to it. Normally, patients…you, in this case," the Alliance officer said, looking at Amber. "Are only allowed visitors within a certain time of day. Any later than that, and it usually has to be a family member, and children usually need to be accompanied by an adult as well."

Amber dipped her head away from her visitors. _Family. Why does it always come down to family? I wasn't orphaned by choice. Even more proof the world doesn't give two shits about me, if it's putting these rules around all over the place. I mean…I've been alone for years and now…I have Mel. It shouldn't matter if we're related by blood! Isn't this enough? Can't it just be enough, for once?_ Her eyes burned at the thoughts infesting her mind, a feeling she fought with each fiber of her body._ I'm not going to cry in front of a stranger, especially over something so damn selfish. Get over yourself, Amber! You're better than this._

She shifted herself slightly, ignoring the dull pain shuddering through her torso. "Makes sense." It was all she could think of that she wouldn't stumble over. She heard a deep grunt from the side of her bed.

"I didn't think it did. Anyway, it's been nice meeting you…" Anderson's words trailed off, but his eyes were still focused on Amber. Quickly, that focus shifted to Melody as she hopped off the railing and extended her hand.

"I'm Melody. She's Amber." Amber's jaw dropped at the admission. _What the heck is she doing? He could…he could be tricking her! The Alliance funds a lot of orphanages, they could have been behind what happened last night! How can we know if we're safe here, anymore! UGH, that girl… I swear she does this on purpose, sometimes._

Anderson accepted the comical handshake and thanked her, before looking back at the bedridden girl. Her eyes gazed in his direction, but it was clear she was too busy thinking to focus; her face giving just a hint of the worry storming inside of her. _It's going to take a lot to calm this one down,_ he thought to himself, wondering how to put her at ease. _Soldiers are easy. Kids…_

"I'm finishing my shore leave soon, but I can stop by later tonight to check in. I don't want that policeman harassing you two." He said, making sure both were somewhat paying attention. The redhead in front of him nodded eagerly while the bed-ridden brunette slowly nodded.

As he left the room, he opened up his omni-tool and fired off a message. He hoped the favours he'd done for the Alliance training facilities had earned him some in return. _I need answers. Those kids should be in the system somewhere. All kids are identified in some form when they enter the school system, or when they get their immunization shots, or a hundred of different other events. They have to be somewhere! Unless… someone's hiding them… _The thought compelled him to send a second message, requesting urgent action. _I still have some time left, at least._

* * *

The afternoon had been a dull affair; Amber yearned of sleep or instantaneous recovery. Both would give her a reprieve of the lack of mobility and pain she was experiencing. In her dreams, she'd run around that meadow, tumbling through the overgrown grass field and admiring the beauty of the expanse before her. Her dreams tended to be similar from dream to dream, often reflecting the current season; eventually, as time passed, they would segue into some other area, or event, but it would usually be a slow transition. _Like a little part of me, telling me to be patient. Of course, that part doesn't have to lay here like a sack of potatoes._

Melody had been sitting near the bed, scrawling away determinedly on a pad of paper a nurse had given her in an attempt to recreate the drawings she'd given Amber the previous night. It was a gesture that didn't go unnoticed by Amber, but it all felt so dull to her, so artificial. Shifting her gaze back at the ceiling, she gave a light sigh, thinking about the previous night.

_I yelled at her to leave. I begged her to, but she…stayed. I wanted to protect her, but I couldn't. The only protection I could offer was her leaving me behind, and I knew that wouldn't happen. I'm such an idiot. I need to be better than that._ Amber's brow knotted in frustration at the thoughts racing through her head, but she couldn't help herself. There was nothing else to distract her. _In the end, she tried to protect you. I would have gotten her killed. But I'm alive, and so is she, and I should be happier. I should feel better around her. Why don't I?_

Her mind paused at that. Why was an awful lot of question, in that context. The more she thought, the more she tried to shrink away into herself. The answer was on her lips but she didn't want to give it room to breathe. Emotions were already raging inside her like a freshly thawed river in Spring. _I don't need this right now, I just…_Her head shifted to the side so she could see Melody, who was in the midst of drawing the Elcor again, but something new was being added that she couldn't make out from that angle. _I make fun of her crying, I make fun of her being clingy, but it's because she cares. I…_

_Goddamnit_! Amber winced, crushing her eyelids together. She was desperately trying to hold back the torrents of guilt; each stream hot against her cheek as they cascaded along the sides of her face, dripping onto the bedsheet. _Did Mel ever cry for herself? Why the hell am I throwing a pity party? I don't deserve it. She would never leave me behind. I…if I were in her position…oh God I might have._

_I think I'd have left her._

Her gaze returned to the ceiling, selfishly hoping that gravity would quell the tears. _Pathetic. This is who I am. All things said and done, I'm the same as before. Everything I hoped would change in me, everything that cut me off from all the other kids…it stayed. I wanted to help her. I wanted to have a friend...an actual friendship. I wanted someone to smile at me genuinely, and to be able to smile back the same way. I wanted to care for someone, and them to care for me, but…I mean, that part of me is there. I know it is, but…I feel that I'd just as soon throw Mel on the fire to save my own ass. No matter what I do, will I always focus on my own survival? At any cost? Damnit. I don't want to know what I'd do if I was forced into that situation…two parts of me…God only knows which of them I'll become. _

Wiping her eyes with her free hand, she glanced back over at Melody, who was just finishing up her artwork, that goofy smile filling her face as she checked over the details.

The redhead bounced off her chair and hopped over to Amber's side, proudly displaying her drawing.

_I don't deserve her._

"Happy birthday, Birdy!"

_Yet._

Amber gave her a kind smile, lightly grasping the drawing and bringing it into a better light. The Elcor was finely detailed like the one she'd been given before, and unlike in the dark of their orphanage, she could make out what seemed to be their noses this time. It had an odd looking speech bubble above it, stating "With outraged frustration: we are not space elephants." which had Amber breaking out in laughter. _Of course she would pick on me. I'm sorry, they look like elephants! _

"Amber, are you okay? Your face is all wet." Mel asked, genuinely confused. Amber wiped her face with her free hand after giving the drawing back to Melody for safe-keeping. Try as she might, she couldn't break the smile from her face.

"I'm just happy, I guess."

* * *

The two girls inside chattered away jovially, unaware of the orderly who'd been at the doorframe watching them. The man flicked on his omni-tool and opened up the voice comm..

"Finch. I think I found the two that escaped last night. They're here in the Royal Ottawa. … Look, visiting hours close soon, so if you wanna see them today, it's gotta be soon. … Yeah, I can get you in, you know I bleed red, man. … Thanks, boss."

Closing it, he wondered what the two girls had done to piss off the Tenth Street Reds so much that they'd put out an APB on them across the city. "Not my problem anymore." He muttered, walking down the hall. "Just hope they know what's coming after them."

* * *

**A/N: I decided to slice this hospital stay into two chapters, because while I'm still a bit ahead of schedule, I don't want to release a 9000+ word chapter, and I felt this was an alright spot to leave the chapter on.**

**It's a pretty basic chapter, lots of dialogue that I'm not sure is all that effective at what I wanted to portray, but I'm trying, at least. This chapter's got more angst per capital than there will be for a while, so if you're not so into that, the next few chapters should be better for that. They'll still have some, obviously.  
I had always believed Anderson was familiar with Shepard either early in her military career at some point, but I had an idea rumbling around in my mind that I feel is…maybe effective enough to propel the plot forward to where I wanted it to go. I decided to have him run into the two of them earlier on while visiting a friend he'd done N5 training with. He won't play too big of a role, he IS in the tail end of his shore leave, afterall.**

**Anywho, I hope you enjoyed it. I should have another out relatively soon. It's starting to get into the parts that have been festering in my mind for a while. Have a great weekend!**


	6. Chapter 6

Shore leave had been a minor victory, once, for David Anderson. Each bout of rest would have been earned through grueling training, strenuous battles, and long drawn-out assignments. It was a small oasis in the eye of a hurricane, affording him time enough to gather his bearings, recover from the stress and injuries placed on his body. The disaster on Camala had changed that.

Saren Arterius had changed that.

He had achieved accolades within the Alliance, he had worked himself into a position of great respect, even to the degree where the council had begun to prepare him as a Spectre candidate. The Alliance had hoped he would succeed, it would boost humanity's profile in the galaxy as more respectable and trustworthy. The pressure was enormous, and had Anderson crumpled under that pressure, it would have been easier to bear. Instead, he thrived, he rescued the scientist Kahlee Sanders, and the mission had seemed like as much of a victory as one could hope for. _But Saren blew up the refinery and cast the blame on me. And now I'm on shore leave again. I'm not sure the Alliance knows what to do with me. _

Since the 'failure', Anderson had bounced around from minor mission to minor mission, being assigned weeks and months of shore leave in between. _I've spent almost a quarter of the last year away from duty._ Anderson thought, _There's only so many friends I can visit before I get antsy again, before I need to get out there. But I'll probably just get to supervise another shakedown run, before I'm given another month of leave. _

Anderson gazed out the window at the city before him. Even with the spattering of rain on the glass, it was clear the city was a dull affair. _No chance in hell I'm coming back here when I hit shore leave. At least London looks as though it's living at night._

Anderson shifted away from the window, closer to where he'd spent much of the previous day. The hotel room had been fairly basic, but a nook in the main room had drawn his interest. From the exceedingly comfortable black leather chair, he could still see outside, and the end table beside it had a cherry finish that helped warm the room up just enough so that it felt worthwhile to relax there. The forty of Crown Royal Black had been the final step of seduction, but looking at the mostly empty bottle a day later only left Anderson with a sense of shame.

_I won't let myself fall that far._

A call from an old friend who was in his troop during N5 training had brought him to this city, had brought him to the hospital. Gosselin hadn't been the easiest soldier to get along with, but he was a good man who bled blue for the Alliance. Anderson had found him at the Royal Ottawa, gunshot wounds across his arms and chest. He thought back to their conversation from the previous day.

* * *

"Anderson, I heard what happened. Fuck, you need to…you need to just get out there man. Pressure them. Thirty-something's too young to retire, David."

Anderson had studied the man's face, trying to see if the man in front of him was joking. "I don't think they plan on doing that, Goose. It's just them trying to figure out what to do with me while things settle over." Goose shook his head quickly, anger flooding across his face.

"Anderson, do you know why I'm here? Because four years ago, some dipshit politician and his military connections decided to go against council law and pushed some illegal crap to the Volus against trade sanctions. I was told it would be an easy assignment and that I could make commander if all went well, so I took it. Only thing I was told to do was to protect the shipment, and not to break the seals. I had no fucking clue what was in the cargo bay. They were all labeled as if they were produce and shit…hell, some were, probably. Apparently, most weren't. We spent eight months shipping this stuff across, doing our patrols, and some council fucks find out what we're storing. I had no idea, of course, I was only the XO, but the fallout was shitty. I did nothing wrong, I did everything by the book…just some politician took advantage of us and then they have the gall to pressure the military…PRESSURE THE MILITARY…fucks sakes…"

Anderson had stood by the bed, his head slowly moving subtly from side to side in shock. "Goose, I hadn't heard…"

"And most probably didn't hear about you either. They decided to put me on shit assignments. A few weeks on, a month off. A few weeks on, two months off. My latest shore leave was 9 months, David. They're trying to forget about me, forget anything ever happened. I was the fall guy. Tell me, any of this sound familiar?" Goose's face darkened as he spat out those last words. "I need to do something. The Alliance was all I had, all I was…I got a job in security to keep myself busy because they're not giving me shit for assignments. Got shot up and now the Alliance has me on 'indefinite leave', the fuckers."

The thought of being sidelined had struck a sense of fear through him. He joined to make a difference, to help humanity, and he wanted to repair the damage Saren had caused, that Dr Qian had caused to the Alliance. _They wouldn't hide me just to appease some politicians or councilors, would they? _He had thought at the time.

"Don't let them get you, Anderson. They could afford to lose me. They can't afford to lose you, even if they don't know it yet. Don't end up like me."

* * *

Even after helping the young redhead at the hospital, his mind had kept drifting toward that conversation, toward the nagging thoughts telling him he wouldn't take on any meaningful missions going on, that he'd be dishonored, that Saren would get away with it all. He had recalled marching over to that bottle of Crown Royal. _At least I wised up the next morning. Maybe that was my plan to begin with. _

Anderson stirred from his reverie at the chime of his omni-tool. _Finally, I've been waiting all day. Visitor hours are nearly over_. He quickly opened his comm tab and ran the vid call.

"Anderson! Sorry I'm as late as I am." The man in the holo was visibly hustling down a street as he spoke into his omni-tool.

"Don't worry yourself about that, Clarke. Did you find anything out?" In truth, Anderson hadn't been given much to work from. Two first names, hair colours, a general location, and being held off the record. A call from another friend had informed him of the Alliance's habit of separating their funded orphans from regular records while in charge of them, but it had been the only information he'd been able to relay at that point. _I didn't have much, but hopefully it was enough. _

The man quickly looked over his shoulder before returning to nod at Anderson. "Yes, but we need to talk in person. Things are a little more complicated than they should be. Pub Italia, three blocks from where you're at right now. I don't have much time before I need to clear my tracks, so you need to get here fast. See you in a minute, Anderson."

_What the hell is going on?_ Anderson thought to himself, while throwing on his coat and boots. _How could two girls be worth this trouble?_

* * *

When Amber saw them enter, she was surprised. Their red and black leather vests had unnerved her, prompting memories of the thug that had chased her, of the men hassling Hal in the yard, of Melody curled up against her after her unfortunate night out. She felt fear trickle into her as more men walked though the doorway into her room_…three, four, five, six…_Amber was aware that Mel and herself were at their mercy. From that, she felt a shred of helplessness from her injuries.

Mostly, though, she felt her body start to tingle as anger replaced the dull ache throughout her body. From the guns being pointed at herself and Melody, it was clear that the intruders were in control. _At least, for now. I'll wait, they'd have shot us by now if they wanted to kill us. What do they want?_

Melody had taken the initiative to hide behind the wooden bedside chair, providing little to no cover. Amber gave her a brave smile and looked back toward the only man not pointing a gun at her. He simply stood at the end of the bed, smoking a cigarette and looking toward the open window. He didn't look too much older than a teenager, but he carried an air of authority. _Please don't be as much of an idiot as that kid in the orphanage. Last thing I need is some vague conversation and not being able to hit him in the face._ She thought to herself, audibly grumbling.

"I'll assume you're a smart little shit and know who we are already?" the man said before taking a drag of his cigarette.

Amber's nose wrinkled at the insult, but she decided not to antagonize the group. "Your clothes look familiar. Don't know a name. You're part of a gang, I assume?"

"Interesting. And here I thought everyone knew about the Tenth Street Reds." The man put out his smoke on the counter, grinding it into the steel, before moving over to the side of her bed. "Let me illuminate something for you…we own this city. We own these streets. The second you left that damn orphanage, we owned you. Am I clear?"

_At least he's straight up with me. A jerk, but he's not pretending like he's hot shit._ "Clear enough, yeah." She said, looking him in the eye with a nonchalant shrug of her left shoulder. _I wish I could tear him apart but the best I can do is just sit here and listen._

"I'm going to make this clear enough for even a fucking cockroach like you to understand. When you heal up, we're gonna take you and your little ginger shit, and we're going to do what we want with you. If you cooperate, you'll find we might be forgiving of your little outburst the other night; you might get off with light punishment. You run or try to fuck around with us, and we'll sell you to a slave ring, where you can be one of their drooling, mindless fuck-dolls. You look old enough to understand the implications. Either way, it's our decision, because you're our property. Is that clear enough for you?" he spoke, a vile looking sneer forming on his face. "If it isn't, we can give you a demonstration with that little shit behind the chair."

Amber had been trying to keep calm, but the threat against Melody had begun to push her over the edge. The tingling had burst into a burning sensation all over her body, and her fists clenched from both the anger fueling her and the tension from her skin feeling on fire. "You made yourself clear." Each word struggled out of her mouth, as she attempted to calm herself. _This ass thinks…knows he can threaten Mel, threaten us. I don't give a crap what he thinks he owns! We won't be there when he comes to claim us, and we won't be slaves for any assholes! _

"Good. You'll stay here. Your friend will be fine here too. One of our members says you're a bit protective of her. So do yourself a favour…" The man leaned in close to Amber, his stale breath filling her personal space. "…protect her. Don't give us a reason to hunt you down like the filth you are. We enjoy our hunts, as your little friend here can testify to."

The man straightened himself and motioned toward the door with his hand. As the men piled out, the man followed, but stopped at the doorway. Looking over his shoulder, he offered an icy grin. "Get well soon, sweets."

Minutes after the gang had gone, Amber was still vibrating in her hospital bed; her temper still flaring, her skin still incredibly sensitive and burning.

"We won't let them take us, will we?" The words broke through the silence, delivered monotonously. Amber turned her head over to look at the source. Melody's face was pale and void of emotion, staring at the doorway intently.

"No. No we won't." Amber spoke, barely containing the fury inside her. Melody turned to face Amber and for a moment, both perfectly understood that happiness would need to be taken. Life would be earned.

* * *

The pub was a tiny establishment littered with festive memorabilia, much of it from Italian sporting achievements; the most notable being an ancient looking photograph celebrating Italy's World Cup victory from over a hundred and sixty years ago. The hour was still early for drinking, allowing Anderson to find Clarke in a booth near the back quite easily. Sitting down across from him, he noticed his friend sweating bullets, wringing his hands intensely.

"Clarke, what's got you so worked up?" Anderson thought back to his previous meetings with Clarke. He'd been a coordinator for both ICT and the N program, managing candidacy recommendations and coordinating with all of the Alliance to ensure the efficacy of training regiments. He had friends in high places, he had access to nearly anyone, so Anderson had figured him a perfect candidate for a favour. _Perhaps I was wrong?_

"Look, we have to be quick, I don't know if we're being watched or not." Clarke replied, nervously.

"I'm pretty sure the Alliance won't court marshal us over two little girls, my friend." A member of the waiting staff approached, causing Clarke to tense up. Anderson shook his head slightly. "I'll have a scotch on the rocks, thanks."

Once the waiter was out of hearing range, Clarke leaned in toward Anderson. "Not the Alliance. I'm not sure, but something went dirty. I scanned for those names you gave me. Luckily, they're not common, so I was able to narrow them down pretty quickly by the features you gave me. Well, not exactly, see they weren't even in the current database. I had to skim back a year or so to an archived list of Alliance-funded orphanages, and their orphans. In the span of a year, they disappeared along with a lot of others. Just vanished."

Clarke paused as the scotch was delivered. Anderson took a swig and motioned for his friend to continue.

"But that's not all. See, I did some analysis and noticed a few patterns surrounding the ones that went missing. In truth, it didn't take long to narrow them down once I found the one thing they had in common. Anderson, do you remember that explosion in Singapore back in '51?" Anderson felt a knot form in his stomach as his memory shifted to the Singapore disaster. _I was just a kid, but… the amount of deaths, the horrendous tumors those children would have…_

"Lots of people got exposed to Eezo. Well, between then and '58, the Alliance found out that the disaster in Singapore…it produced kids with biotic abilities. Not many…most died of cancer or weren't affected, but still, like, ten percent. So in '58, these kids went from the public records and public orphanages to confidential Alliance records and strictly Alliance funded orphanages, run jointly by us and Conatix. I mean, that's a lot of kids that just so happen to be orphans. Coincidence?"

Anderson took another drink of his scotch. "You're saying all these kids that went missing…they were exposed to Eezo, and taken…or hid away by the Alliance. But you mentioned the Alliance isn't…listening to us?"

Clarke shook his head animatedly. "That's the thing. These kids were kept together for the most part, from their entry into the system until a year ago, when they went missing. Now, this isn't a big project…I know those when I see them…but it was substantial enough to have enough red tape to strangle a horse. It took some hacking, but the guy in charge of the program, on the Alliance side, vacated his position about six months ago, and it's empty. The Conatix rep has been removed from the record. I had traces trying to track me down, they're probably close now. Something's wrong here, those kids were hidden."

_But Conatix is working with the Alliance. They helped establish Jump Zero, we have biotic training programs now. I don't get it…_ Anderson sat and pondered a response for a moment. "So the question to ask is why this went dark, and why it's so important that it stay that way…"

"I have an idea. Those kids…they were found a few blocks away from a building fire. No solid eye-witnesses, but it wasn't tended to by firefighters for a number of hours. The reports written about the blaze are really minimal and don't list enough details for me to think it's valid. I know mission reports, I've scanned reports of disasters like this, and this was different. Some people saw a lot of Reds scouring the area before the cops showed up. I think that something went wrong, those kids escaped that building…and the Reds were brought in to clean up. Now, there are pictures of police wearing gas masks in the area…why would that be? Why was that not mentioned?"

Clarke leaned back, checking his omni-tool nervously, then giving a small sigh of relief.

"You're saying those kids were exposed to Eezo again? But, what's the point in that?" Anderson shook his head as if he could dislodge the growing sense of dread he was feeling. "Are they even allowed to do that?"

Clarke shook his head. "The official Alliance position is that there's no reason to, but Conatix has pushed for the 'study of accidental second exposure' for years. Recently they've gained a reputation for being able to track Eezo exposure victims incredibly quickly, if you catch my drift. Often within a day. And the exposures just happened to increase around '58. With that much leeway…If a program has gone dark, and doesn't have Alliance oversight anymore, could they not feel they have the ability to chance it?"

"God damnit. They should spend more time fixing those damned L2 implants than putting children at risk." Anderson slammed back the rest of the drink. "Anything else, Clarke?"

"Just one thing. Look, the Alliance gives Conatix some money, but really, it's pretty much all accounted for unless they've been planning this for a decade. Chances are, when the Alliance lead dropped off, someone else stepped in to fund it, and are now trying to clean this mess up. Still might be Alliance, but given the trace attempts on me, I'm guessing it's a group unfamiliar with Alliance encryption."

"It's not a damn local gang, that's for certain." Anderson knew the Reds' reputation. They'd grown in power in recent years, expanding from Montreal through much of the United North American States; the gang was known for their viciousness and their information brokering, which they likely used to get politicians under their thumbs. _Still, they're a gang, not a huge organization with a lot of funds to spare, a goal other than to expand. Who could be in on this?_

"Exactly. Which is why I really have to go get back. I've sent my info to your omni-tool." Clarke hurriedly stood up and shuffled his way out of the booth. "Good luck Anderson, with whatever you're going to do. But please...don't ask me for help again. I pulled a lot of strings for you…you owe ME now, Lieutenant." Clarke said with a grin, before he quickly made his way out of the pub, leaving Anderson to his thoughts.

_So those girls might have biotic potential. Makes sense that Conatix would want to test them, but they've never been vicious outside of those all-too-coincidental exposures. They normally sit back and watch progress happen naturally. So who needs them so badly that they hired a gang? That maybe an alliance officer was threatened out of his position? Hell, the Conatix rep was redacted, so it might not even be Conatix anymore…Damn. This is the only time I'll ever wish I had more shore leave to get to the bottom of this._ Anderson glanced at his watch. _Only nine hours until I leave for the Arc._

Anderson hailed the waiter and paid both tabs hastily with his credit chit, before throwing his coat back on. _I can figure out what to do with the kids on the way to the hospital._

* * *

It took most of the evening for Amber to cool down and focus on the problems waiting her and Melody when they left. Dinner certainly didn't help aid her efforts, what with the nurse offering her second meal of nutrient paste that day. An empty tube laid on the counter beside her bed, taunting her with memories of how gross it had been; Amber's skin crawled just thinking about the horrific texture of it. _Oh boy, curry chicken flavoured nutrient paste! How I love the grainy, mushy texture…how it only remotely tastes like chicken, and mostly tastes like yellow anger… What a feast I look forward to in the coming days! Why, maybe I'll have a whole tube of banana flavoured nutrient paste tomorrow, or maybe one tasting like burnt toast! Oh the joys of nutrient paste, how I had missed thee…_

Worse than the thought of eating the paste was the thought of how long she would have to remain hospitalized. _Two and a half weeks_. The nurse's words were a revelation to her; her list of injuries even more damning. _Four fractured ribs, a type three separation of her right shoulder, whatever that means, and bruising from my abdomen up to my neck, basically. No wonder why I hurt all over…god. Not even one day in and I feel I've had enough of this to last a lifetime. Now I need to stick through another two or three weeks? Ugh…_

Melody had gone down to the gift shop with the nurse, who Mel had seemingly won the heart of a mere few seconds into her visit, so Amber just sat and looked at the open window and took in the sound of the rain. _It'd be nice to see what the city looks like, all shiny and lit up._ _It's weird, I've lived here for so long and all I've seen are grimey side streets, alleyways, orphanages, and maybe one or two 'parks', if they even counted as that. It's like I'm being taunted._

Her thoughts were interrupted by the tall Alliance Lieutenant from earlier striding into her room. Anderson quickly scanned the room, his body betraying the worry he felt.

"She went down to the gift shop." Amber said nonchalantly, still staring at the window. _I wonder what it'll be like, living out there. Seeing all those people, those lights, those…_

"You let her leave?" The lieutenant's voice was etched with concern. _Why did he even come back? Why does he even pretend to care?_

"It's not like I'm in any condition to stop her." Amber snapped back at him, eyes still facing the window. "Besides, she was really excited and she's with a nurse, so she'll be fine. We're not going anywhere."

Anderson tossed his drenched coat onto the wooden chair near the bed and moved to the railing, leaning over it in an attempt to get her attention.

"I don't want to worry you, but there are people trying to find you. For what purposes I don't…"

"Shut up."

Anderson looked confusedly at the brunette laid out before him. She was immobile for certain, but her body looked tense enough to spring out at a moment's notice. Her hazel eyes' golden rings around her pupil blazed like the winter sun; brilliantly, but cold and bone-chillingly uncomfortable. "Child, I'm just trying to help you…"

"CHILD?" Amber erupted, struggling to sit up more than she already was, ignoring the violent arcs of pain tearing through her body. "I'm not a fucking child! Children don't watch a hundred of the kids they've known for months crushed to death, burned to ashes, suffocating from the smoke! Children don't watch their friends brutally murdered in front of them! Children don't go dumpster diving because goddamnit they can't do another five week stretch without food!"

Amber's ribs hurt from sitting up and from her heavy breathing, her eyes clouded with tears. _Calm down, Amber. Don't keep yourself here any longer than you need._ After a momentary pause, she continued her rant against the shocked looking soldier. "I might not be an adult, but I'm not a child, and the slavers they sell us to won't see us as children either, unless we're really unlucky. Don't pretend you don't know what 'purposes' these people are after us for. They came here a few hours ago, they were pretty clear! And I'm here, worse than helpless, and you're trying to tell me I'M the bad guy for letting Mel out of my sight? Fuck you! The Alliance has messed with us enough!"

The girl's glare was fiercely upon Anderson, and for a moment, he'd almost wished he had waited until the redhead had returned. "Look Amber…Amber Shepard, is it?"

"Oh great, you're spying on me now. I love how you made the honourable choice to take instead of nicely asking. You're welcome." Amber turned her gaze back to the window, angry at herself for taking her frustration out on him, and angry at him for insulting her.

"Amber, I won't bore you with the details, but there are people after you and they aren't the Reds. They want you for…your potential." He gauged her body language as he finished the sentence, trying to see how she would react. Her eyes quickly darted to Anderson and were back at the window within a second. Silence hung in the air for what seemed like a minute before the girl spoke again.

"The details are all I have left in my life. Everything else is gone. You don't have to dance around the fact, sir." Her voice dripped with disdain at the given title. She thought back to a news story she'd watched with Hal about slave and prostitution rings. "I'm fourteen. I haven't heard a lot about it, but I know what happens to girls on the street. They won't win that from me, or Mel. I don't care who's after us…we're two orphans that nobody gives a crap about, so it can't …"

"You might be a biotic." This time, Anderson had interrupted the girl, who first looked at him with annoyance, but quickly afterward with confusion.

"A biotic? I don't know what that is. "

Anderson paused, unsure of how much detail to offer. _A simple extranet search and she'll find out most of the really bad stuff…The mortality rate of the children, the parents…Damnit how am I supposed to tell a child that her mother…How can I…_

"Sir? You need to tell me what that means." Amber's voice was much calmer than before, but her body was still rigid, her hands clenched. Anderson shook the cobwebs from his head.

"Biotics have…certain abilities. They can, with help, learn to move objects with their mind, among other similar abilities. Now, you might not be one…but there's the potential."

"How does someone be a biotic, anyway? How do they know they're a biotic? I'm fourteen, I think I'd know by now." Amber narrowed her eyes at Anderson, skeptical of his claim. Anderson sighed heavily before continuing.

"It's not a natural ability. There needs to be an…exposure to a certain chemical. Ten percent of….eligible exposed individuals generally gain biotic potential. According to what I dug up, you were exposed before, as was Melody. It doesn't manifest…show up…usually until between the ages of twelve and sixteen." Anderson tried to sound convincing, but the girl's eyes bore into him. _I hate lying to children, I wish I wasn't such a softie._

"Who are 'eligible'? What about the other ninety percent? Don't lie to me, sir. Just be straight with me."

"The eligible ones are…unborn children. This chemical has only been proven effective on unborn children. Ten percent of them gain biotic ability. Most of the others wind up unaffected. Some…some…" Anderson struggled over the decision to tell the girl the truth. _She's already hurt, already worried. I don't need to add to that_. "Some get sick… The flu, mono, things like that. It can be harmful for newborns, but like I said, most wind up healthy."

Amber was quick with her next inquiry; she felt he'd probably lied, but she would look into it later. She knew enough. "And everyone who was already born? What happened to them?"

Anderson lowered his head slightly. "Like the others, most were unaffected. Some contracted various forms of cancer, which is potentially deadly, but generally curable so long as it's caught early enough." Anderson cleared his throat and continued. "Look, you and Melody were put in Alliance orphanages since you were young. Except, this last one, you were dropped from our program. I just want to help you two out. Living on the street isn't safe, and if you've been threatened, then we can protect you. We have an Alliance boarding school…not an orphanage…and when you turn eighteen you can…"

"You want me to trust you? Your Alliance orphanages had a death count of nearly fifty each year from starvation. That's not helping, that's just letting us die and building a new prison for us when too many die in one building. You want to help?" Amber looked up at Anderson inquisitively.

"I've spent all day trying to help you."

"I don't care. If you want to help, you'll get me and Mel a shuttle to some random colony, and forget we ever existed." Amber sunk back into her bed, her body exhausted for the moment.

"Maybe I should ask Melody about the offer. It seems she's a bit more reasonable…"Anderson's focus was interrupted by the redhead bursting through the doorway and over to the left side of Amber's bed, opposite Anderson. "Speaking of which."

"Birdy! Look what the nurse got me! It's so awesome!" Melody, grinning from ear to ear, held up a tiny acorn attached to a simple metal chain. "It's an acorn necklace! Do you like it?" Melody cocked her head, still smiling, and started spinning the acorn around on the chain. Amber recognized the acorn's profile, the semi-fuzzy exterior and the stout shape of it, but couldn't put a name to it. The girl's smile and childish mannerisms set Amber more at ease, but she knew there was still unfinished business with the Lieutenant.

"Yeah, Mel, that's actually pretty cool. It really suits you, you friggin' goof." Amber said, poking Melody lightly in the stomach, interrupting her concentration on the spinning acorn. "Did you have fun?"

Melody nodded her head casually. "It had a lot of stuff I haven't seen before. It was kind of weird, but fun, I guess." She hesitated and turned to Anderson, her smile vanishing. "I heard you two arguing on the way in. Did you tell him about the gang, Birdy?"

Amber bristled at the pet-name being used around Anderson, but nodded. "Yeah, we went over it. He thinks sending us to school will fix it." Her eyes were glued on Anderson. Melody kept her eyes on the man as well.

"We would have some protection for you until you got better, then we'd bring you to a boarding school where you'd be safe and could finish your education. I think it's fair to say school is preferable to the streets." Anderson spoke, trying to be as diplomatic as possible.

Before Melody could speak, Amber interjected. "Just think, Mel. Does that sound all that different than what the gang told us?" _I don't trust him. He's hiding something._

"He can help us, Amber!" Melody grasped Amber's arm suddenly, drawing her attention away from Anderson for a moment. "I trust him!"

"Just because he's been to space, doesn't mean he's trustworthy, Mel. They let us rot in those crappy orphanages, they let kids like us die from starvation, they forgot about us. Now he's telling us he can make it better. I'm sorry, I don't think he can." Amber's voice was soft, and with each word, she felt herself nearly pleading for her friend to understand her. Instead, Melody shook her head slowly.

"Please, Amber. You don't need to be the only one to keep me safe."

Amber's face froze as those words sunk in. _Is that what I've been doing? Is that why I…no…they've hurt us…but…I know I'm not enough. Fuck, I know she deserves more than me. _Amber's face felt strange as a thumb against her cheek. Her vision was cloudy but she could recognize the red-head's smile anywhere.

Amber did her best to blink away the tears that had pooled in her eyes. "I just want you to be safe." She said, lowering her head. "And you're right. I want to protect you." _And that's how you got here Amber, you idiot. How can you protect her on your own? Last time, you nearly died, and you expect her to want you to trust you over a soldier? You're so pathetic_. Amber's thoughts skittered through her mind like bugs as she started cracking her knuckles nervously.

"You do. You will." Melody pulled Amber's dazed focus back to her, smiling. "But we need help, Amber. We're too young to do this on our own. Please."

Amber took a few moments to gather her thoughts. _Mel's right. I won't rely on the soldier, but I'll trust him for now, and see where that leads. _Amber turned to face Anderson, who looked as resolute as ever.

"Fine. Don't let us down, Lieutenant Anderson."

Anderson nodded firmly at the girls in front of him before retrieving his coat.  
"I promise you'll find safety."

After Anderson left, Amber's gaze once again returned to the window. She could hear the rain outside, the shuttles fly by, the rustle of leaves; she could hear so much and held onto the promise that it truly existed. She had seen those things before, in different places, in different times. _Nature always proves itself. It always keeps its promise_.

It was Anderson's that she wasn't so sure about.

* * *

**A/N: Wow, this wound up being a juggernaut of a chapter. Still a little bit of hospital stay left, but it's a formality. Next chapter will bring a bit more adventure :)**

**Again, like last chapter, I'm not exactly sure I accomplished what I wanted. Not sure if I gave too much information at once, whether that flashback of Anderson's was a good idea, and in some spots I felt like I stumbled around the dialogue...among a few other things. But mostly, I'm pretty happy with it. **

**Not sure how long the next chapter will be. I haven't started writing much of it yet. Might be up to a week, I've got some busy days ahead of me. My initial plan was ten chapters on Earth, but it will probably have to stretch much further than that. Well, maybe not by a lot. Maybe 12-14 chapters on Earth.**

**As always, any feedback on what I'm doing wrong, or doing right is deeply appreciated, and again, I have to thank the growing cast of followers and reviewers, you're all really great for giving me the time to share my story with you :) I won't update before Friday, so have yourselves a great weekend!**


	7. Chapter 7

_May 2nd 2168_

* * *

The floor was cool against her feet as she lowered herself off the bed. After the first week and a half of being confined to the uncomfortable slab, the feel of walking around was freeing for Amber. The view by the window was a wonderful one, a view that drew her breath upon her first glimpse of it. The rains of April had melted the thick layers of snow away, leaving the surface of the city bare, allowing the small patches of green to bring a sense of life to the streets. The buildings were shimmering spires, stretching upward to the heavens, shining illustriously in the sun. There were trees scattered across the sides of the streets, providing ample shade for passers-by. Shuttles and skycars stormed through the sky, but they only accented the tranquility of the city itself, allowing a glimpse of the activity and hectic lives people lived. At night, when Amber had snuck out into the city before, life only trickled past her, if at all. In the light of day, it astounded her to see how many people lived in the city. The mere thought of what those people did with their lives was staggering, but comforting.

_There are so many people out there living just basic, regular lives. I think that finally, the odds are with me this time_. She thought, returning to the window for another view. The clouds had begun to blanket the sky as twilight crept westward.

"Hey Mel, ever give a thought to what you want to do when you get older?" Amber asked. She knew her friend wanted to get out to a colony, but nothing too specific was shared.

"Hrm." Melody sat up at the end of the bed, tilting her head sideways. "I dunno. Maybe a farmer. Then I could have all the food I wanted! Or maybe…" Her voice trailed off as she lost herself in her thoughts.

Amber turned from the window to look at her puzzled friend, who recoiled a bit one realizing she was being stared at. _Weird. Mel's usually pretty up front with me_. "Or maybe…what? Come on, I'll tell you if you tell me."

"It's nothing." The red-haired girl said, shrinking into herself a bit. "Besides, I already know you want to be a farmer or a cook, so you won't tell me anything I don't know." Melody stuck her tongue out mockingly at Amber, but the brunette knew her friend was hiding something.

"First you won't tell me your birthday, and now you won't tell me what you want to do for a living? I'm not gonna make fun of you or anything." Amber said as she crossed the room and laid herself beside Melody. "I promise."

The girl looked down at Amber with a serious look on her face. "You better not."

"Cross my heart." Amber said, offering a kind smile as her friend sighed loudly.

"I kind of…I sorta…" Melody gazed nervously at her friend as she collected her thoughts. "I was thinking I might wanna be a writer or something. Hal would sometimes bring these datapads filled with books from the library, and I liked reading them sometimes. But it's a stupid idea."

Amber gave Melody a light jab in the side. "Mel, don't be so down on yourself. You've got a great imagination, unlike me. If you can write as well as you can draw, you'd be great at it. If you want to write when you're older, then you'd better start now, though. All you need is a little practice."

Melody fell onto her back with a loud thump, and a grin half formed on her face. "Yeah, I guess I should. I was thinking stories for kids, but I didn't know where to start."

"I hope you're not asking me for a bed time story, I think you're a little old for that." Amber said, her light laughter filling the air.

"Nah. I did like hearing them when I was younger though. One of the older girls would read to me and some others every once in a while. It was nice…she'd borrow one of the teacher's books and tell us about these amazing adventures, or these funny little stories. I always liked the one about the mouse and the lion…reminds me that no matter who you are, if you're nice, good things will happen." Melody turned her head, looking at Amber inquisitively. "What was your favourite as a kid, Birdy?"

Amber knew the answer before the question was even asked. "There was this one…"

* * *

The small brunette scampered aimlessly down the hall, clutching her pillow in both hands. The building was new to her, unfamiliar, and even less so tonight. Her mind was still caught in the last gasps of her nightmare; the crackling of embers echoed around her, an invisible heat rushed through her body as the shadowy rooms and halls emanated a faint orange glow. Tears burned in her eyes as she stumbled around the corner and through the door, into the chapel.

The room was not comforting; the stained glass windows were dark and high, out of reach. The cross at the front of the stage held itself halfway up the wall, its dark golden shape ablaze in the child's frightened eyes. Despite that, she found some solace there; the screams were muffled, more distant, and the room was cooler.

The brunette ran down the aisle before dropping to her knees and crawling beneath one of the pews, her pillow dragging across the old, wooden floor. It was dark under there, and all she could hear was her own labored breathing as she hugged her pillow to her chest tightly, trying to forget the screams of her friends. Trying to forget the flames and the scorching heat amongst the wintery cold. Trying to ignore the guilt. Every night had been the same since the transfer, and more often than not she would cry and wait for the sun to rise before she slept. Everything had seemed more real, more pronounced tonight, and that had sent her into a panic.

She almost didn't hear the footsteps progressing slowly down the aisle toward her hiding place, but a loose board in the floor signaled the approach of another individual. The person broke off from the aisle and slowly made their way to the pew behind where the girl lay, quietly sitting down. The room was silent for what seemed like minutes before the brunette's curiosity had her peeking her head out from underneath her hiding spot.

A young looking woman met her gaze with a warm smile. From the girl's point of view, she was incredibly tall like most of the nuns that worked the orphanage, but her shortly cropped black hair set her apart from the others. The woman also wasn't wearing the traditional black and white, but rather wore a soft grey and white ensemble that was more rarely seen around the building. The girl paused for a moment before crawling out from under the pew, nervously gripping the pillow in one hand. The woman lightly patted the area beside her, and the girl cautiously obliged.

"I think you've visited a few hours too early, child. The chapel looks finest in the morning light." The woman said, lowering her gaze to the girl's possession. "I hope I wasn't disturbing your sleep. I heard you running down the halls and thought it was strange that someone would break curfew alone at such an hour."

The girl remained still on the pew, looking down at the floor in front of her.

"Am I in trouble?" she squeaked out, her jaw digging into the pillow resting against her.

"Far from it. Of course, we prefer you all get a good night's rest, but we will not punish anyone for seeking solace in a more comfortable place." The girl's brow furrowed a bit, wondering how someone could find a hard wooden pew more comfortable than a soft bed.

"Is something troubling you, honey?" the woman asked, her voice smooth as silk. The small child beside her was persistently silent. "Sometimes, when I'm scared or worried, I find a friend to talk to. It usually helps me feel better."

The young girl turned her head sideways slightly. "I don't have any friends left." She mumbled into her pillow, her eyebrows peaking upward.

"You must be a recent transfer. I'm sure in time that you'll find new ones. There are plenty around your age, and they're all quite nice." The woman rested a hand on the girl's shoulder, noticing the girl was quaking slightly. "I can be your friend, if you'd like. My name is Emily."

The girl slid slightly further away from the nun, but kept her eyes locked on the woman's face. "Can talking make it go away?" The words were pleading as tears brimmed in the young girl's eyes.

"Make what go away?" Emily asked inquisitively.

"The screaming." The girl spoke softly, her words barely a whisper as she fought the tears. "The heat and the fire scares me too, but I don't want them to scream at me. I know what I did was bad, and I'm really sorry, but they won't listen." The girl choked back a sob. "I'm so sorry. I didn't want them to die."

The nun sat on the pew, taking in the view beside her detail by detail. Her face fell slightly as she realized the situation. "You're the girl from St. Paul's." The words came breathlessly from her mouth, as she tried to think up a solution to the child's plight. The small girl nodded slowly, drying her eyes with her pillow.

Emily watched the young girl shake as the sobs erupted from her tiny, frail body. Hher heart ached at the sight in front of her, wanting to ease the young girl's mind. "It's not your fault. No one would blame you, I'm certain."

"Yeah, it is!" Amber huffed indignantly, her face transforming from a state of woe to unbridled frustration. "I didn't help them! I wish I did, but I didn't. I was a bad friend…" With that last word, she pulled the pillow up to cover her face, squeezing it tight against her.

Emily recoiled from the overwhelming sense of guilt that emanated from the young girl, and felt herself awash with pity. The woman shifted herself slightly closer to the child. "Well, from what I can tell, you're a good friend. I'm sure your friends would forgive you."

"Then why do they scream at me?" The voice was muffled and quiet, but firm.

"Honey, they don't, they're in heaven now. I'm sure they forgive you. You probably hear them because you feel guilty, because you think it's your fault. You're still scared about what happened and you're blaming yourself. It's not your fault. No child has that responsibility."

Amber slowly lowered her pillow, her eyes visibly red and puffy from crying. She peered nervously at the raven-haired woman from behind her cushion; her hazel eyes held the gaze for a moment before shame darted them away.

"What if you're wrong?" she whispered. "I'm nearly ten, I should have helped them. They would have helped me."

Emily reached over, wiping the tears from the child's face with her thumb. The girl looked curiously at her, but didn't slide away from the touch.

"May I tell you a story?" Amber kept her eyes on Emily's face, and gave a nod, shrugging her shoulders slightly.

"There was once a Shepherd who watched over many flocks of sheep. He was a good shepherd…he knew each of his sheep by name, and they knew him as well. He helped feed them when they were hungry, and sheltered them when the weather turned poor. So long as he was their shepherd, they would have all they needed."

"There were other Shepherds in the land, though," she continued. "Yet they did not truly care for their sheep. They watched over the sheep because it was their job as hired hands, not because they loved the sheep. When wolves and thieves would attack and scatter the flock, these men would run away."

Amber winced, withdrawing herself slightly from the older woman, but her hand gently graced the smaller girl's wrist. Emily smiled apologetically. "Please, I am not blaming you. Child, you are no hired hand. You cared for your friends, did you not?"

Amber's mouth twisted to the side as she nodded slowly. "I knew their names. All of them."

Emily offered a smile at the girl's certainty, and clasped a hand over one of Amber's. "Now, the good shepherd was not fond of these happenings, and many sheep from all over would ask whether or not he was like the rest. He would reply 'I am the good shepherd. Just as I know my sheep, and my sheep know me, so too do my Father and I know each other. Sheep not of this pen, I too, will watch over; there shall be one flock and one shepherd. Although my Father has bestowed upon me free will, I will lay down my life for my sheep. This, I give of my own accord; no man may snare it from me. After I lay down my life, so shall I have the power to take it back, as my Father has granted me. Listen to my voice and I shall not lead you astray.' And the good shepherd would continue to increase his flock and watch over them. He would know their names and love each and every sheep who heard his voice."

Amber sat silently, her face slowly showing a pained expression. "I don't have a father, so I can't be a good shepherd, can I?"

Emily raised her hand to gently stroke Amber's cheek, hoping she could will the girl's self-defeating attitude away. "God is everyone's father. He loves you more than any other in this world."

Amber twisted away slightly, sighing. "I'm not a man either, so it doesn't matter."

"Perhaps when you're older and have more responsibility, you may follow in his footsteps as many men and women have." Emily said, hoping to soothe the mind of the young girl. "Come here." The raven haired woman reached out for a hug, but Amber quickly slid away.

"I'm eight years old; I don't need to be carried back to my bed. I can walk." Amber said, her face twisting in slight disbelief at the arms outstretched in front of her.

Emily laughed lightly, tilting her head to the side. "Don't tell me you've never been hugged before...and I thought you said you were nearly ten!"

"Close enough." Amber grumbled, crossing her arms as she slid herself closer to Emily. "I guess…if I'm supposed to know what it is…I guess you can show me or something. I don't like not knowing."

Emily couldn't help the grin that slid across her face. The brunette was rigid, her face showing her uncertainty and fear, while her eyes darted around nervously.

"Honey, you're safe here." Emily whispered, gently pulling the thin brunette into an embrace. The two of them rested there, unmoving for a short time. Emily felt the girl's tension ease with each passing second. Amber thought back to the story the nun had told her and made a promise to herself.

"Thank you." Amber whispered back sleepily, nuzzling her head into the crook of Emily's shoulder. "I'm kinda tired though. I should go to bed."

Emily paused a moment, expecting the girl to remove herself from her arms, but Amber remained there. "Do you want to walk? Or…" she asked quietly, hoping the girl was in better spirits. The sound of a light snore was all the response she needed.

* * *

Amber crawled over to her side of the bed and propped herself up against a pillow. Melody smiled back at her from the foot of the bed.

"You never told me you were religious, Birdy." Melody said, her face rife with curiosity.

"I'm not sure I am. I mean, I know now that she was talking about Jesus, but…I kinda just want to be good enough to help people. I mean, yeah, farming and cooking seem fun, but something in the back of my mind just wants to do something…bigger. I'm not sure what." She said, glancing over at the window. _I'm not sure if I can, either._

Melody made her way up the bed enough to start repeatedly poking Amber's leg. "But…why were you never around anyone else at the orphanage? Why didn't you have friends? If that's what you want…"

Amber felt sweat form on her brow at her friend's rambling. _It's dark outside. Maybe if I close my eyes and pretend to sleep she'll … no, she'd see right through that, and she'd poke me until I talk to her. Maybe If I push myself out of bed and pretend to fall, maybe then she'd…no, she's just make fun of me. Maybe…_

"Are you religious Mel?" It was a simple question, one which Amber hoped would sidetrack her redheaded friend.

Mel cast her eyes upward in thought and scrunched her face a bit, trying to put words to her ideas. "I don't really know. I always liked those stories where a person would come back to life as an animal or whatever after they died. Not sure that's a religion, but that's about the only thing I'd like to believe about any of that. I dunno, I'm not even fourteen. Got lots of time left to think about that. Besides, you're just avoiding my question."

Amber smirked and twitched her leg around, failing miserably to avoid Melody's poking. "When is your birthday, anyway?" Amber asked.

"I'll tell you some other time." She said, curtly. Melody knew Amber was hiding something, and she decided she was going to poke it out of her. "Can you answer my question now, or do I have to keep poking you?"

Amber's leg twitched at the poking, but she let her friend continue. "I guess…" she started unsure of how to answer. _Should I tell her the truth? Can I really justify hiding away from my issues? She's my friend, right? So… _Amber lowered her head a bit, staring off into the corner of the room. "I guess I was scared I wouldn't be strong enough to help them, like last time. That I couldn't keep them safe." She was surprised at her own words, and how candid they were. It made her feel uneasy, but slightly lighter.

Melody immediately scooted herself up to what she had claimed as her side of the bed and poked Amber on the forehead. "All you need is a little practice." She said, flashing her trademark toothy smile. "Lucky for you, I'm here to help!"

"That's kind of why I worry, you know." Amber gave a strained smile, remembering what she could of the beatdown that had hospitalized her.

Melody knew when Amber drifted off into her own thoughts, and knew that her mind wasn't likely in a good place. She playfully grabbed both of Amber's cheeks, which quickly brought the brunette back into the present, and also rewarded Melody with a look of great disdain.

"Mehw, wet go ow mah cheewks." Amber attempted, before Mel's grip released.

"We're gonna leave this place tomorrow and we'll be in a school, learning…stuff, I guess. You don't need to be such a worrywart. I've told you a million times before, you saved me that night. I don't know how, but that man just…I dunno. He just wasn't. And you were there in the pile of bricks, but you weren't messed up like him." Melody yawned, noting Amber's story had kept them up later than usual. She threw an arm over Amber's stomach and nestled against her friend.

"So we'll be fine. Don't worry. Besides…" the redhead said sleepily, as another yawn crept out of her. "I know you'll always be there for me. So just close your eyes and sleep, you goof."

Amber didn't need to be told twice, as she'd been barely able to keep her eyes open. She pulled the sheets up and over the two of them, and wondered about what the next day would bring.

_I'm holding you to that promise Anderson._

* * *

_The shuttle has windows!_ The thought bounced around Amber's head excitedly as two Alliance soldiers escorted herself, Melody and their belongings out of the hospital to the platform where the shuttle awaited. It rested among numerous other shuttles, but Amber was immediately taken by its traditional Alliance blue and white paint job. _It looks like a blue jay_, she thought, allowing a giddy smile to erupt on her face. As much as she scoffed at the bird jokes Melody would pepper her with, she admired the creatures. _I wonder how high we'll fly up… I can't believe I'm finally going to see the city from above!_

The shuttle wasn't particularly large; she had been in larger ones when moving to other orphanages. It looked more like some of the skycars, in shape, but was much larger. The soldiers ushered the two girls into the seating area in the back, where Amber and Melody immediately grabbed window seats across from each other, waiting eagerly for the shuttle to ascend. One soldier sat in the front with the pilot, and the other grabbed a seat in the back, making sure the girls had their safety harnesses on before liftoff.

The sun had just begun to rise by the time their escort had arrived at their room that morning, and after a short dispute over taking their bag of belongings with them, they had been in the clear. As she sat in the shuttle, Amber realized that she hadn't felt so free in a long time. That feeling was only accented by the slow ascent of the vessel, the platform slowly shrinking off into the distance as it soared higher.

The view was magnificent as they flew amongst the upper levels of the city. Amber had known Ottawa was large, but it seemed to stretch on for tens of kilometers, across two rivers that she'd never known existed. With the shuttle heading toward the sun, the girls were able to get a clear look at the city they had lived in all their lives. _From here, you can't even tell there's a speck of dirt on the ground! This is so thrilling! Everything's so shiny and green…I wonder what this looks like from space…I wonder what the wind would feel like all the way up here…_

Amber glanced over at Melody and noticed the girl had been staring at her. The redhead was smiling ear to ear, her face rife with amusement. "You enjoying your first flight, Birdy?"

She gave a soft laugh and smiled back at her friend. _Am I that obvious?_ "You know, I really am. This is more amazing than I thought it could have been."

The soldier behind Amber leaned forward. "This isn't your first time in a shuttle, is it?"

"No, but it's the first time I've been in one with a view. The city's so amazing…" she spoke, her voice trailing as a plethora of questions filled her head. _The soldiers were nice enough to escort us, should I really bug them with questions? _"Um, excuse me, but…have you ever been to space?" The words escaped Amber nervously. The soldier just chuckled.

"Yeah, most of us have been out there at least a few times. Why do you ask?"

Amber rubbed her neck, feeling awkward and intrusive. "Is it…is it as amazing as people say?"

The soldier's hand reached over the seat and patted her on the shoulder. "Yeah, it is. Don't worry, though, I'm sure one day you'll see it for yourself."

Just as the words left his mouth, the shuttle dipped unexpectedly, knocking the passengers a bit off balance in their seats as the vehicle attempted to stabilize itself. The soldier unstrapped himself from his harness and made his way over to the cockpit entrance. Both girls looked at each other, worry etched on both their faces. _Nothing's ever easy_, Amber thought to herself as she reached across the aisle to grab Melody's outstretched hand.

"Nothing's going to hurt us, I promise. We've come too far." Amber whispered, hoping she had enough conviction in her voice to reassure her friend. Melody nodded solemnly and squeezed a little harder.

"How in the bloody hell did we lose a power core and our comms? How in the hell does that even happen, Chief?" the soldier they'd been sitting with ranted. The other voices were muffled, the girls unable to hear the other half of the conversation.

"Drop to a lower traffic level and keep en route at sixty klicks. We'll crawl there, but at least we won't cause any accidents closer to the surface. Just try and make sure this piece of crap doesn't fail on us any harder."

The descent was fairly exaggerated as they made their way to the much less populated lower traffic lanes. The buildings went by quickly at this elevation, seeming much more familiar, and much less interesting to Amber. _Well, there goes the view. I'm sure I'll see it again._

As the shuttle leveled off, it quickly sideslipped hard to the right, toppling the standing soldier over and pushing the girls hard against their harnesses. Before they could recover, the shuttle made a hard left and descended quickly toward the surface. This time, a voice came loudly from the front of the shuttle.

"Sir! There's a few skycars dropping EMP charges at us! They've got shit aim, but I'm not sure how long I can dodge them in this brick!"

The fallen soldier scrambled over to the back of the shuttle quickly, where his assault rifle hung snug against the wall. "Find a place to land ASAP, Chief." He said, pausing as he checked over his rifle. "This is fucking ridiculous."

The shuttle ducked low and to the right, but it was obvious from the immediate darkening of the shuttle that the pilot hadn't been elusive enough. The soldier in the back pulled himself to his harness and scrambled to secure himself. "Brace for impact!"

Suddenly unable to defy gravity, the construct of metals and ceramics lazily rotated, accelerating its descent toward the quiet street below. The right front tip of the shuttle hit the ground first, gouging open the old asphalt and buckling the pilot's compartment as the spinning vehicle tumbled past scrambling pedestrians, eventually pancaking against an aging building.

Amber's vision was blurry; the impact had shaken her around, and had it not been for the harness, she knew she would likely have been broken against the wall of the shuttle. Her body ached, though she'd grown familiar with it from her stay in the hospital. _Not the best way to recover from an injury_, she thought to herself, groggily working her harness off. She slid off her seat and started on Melody's. The redhead was equally dazed, but seemingly unharmed. The harness came off with a mechanical snap, letting the two girls dizzily move about the grounded vessel. Sparks were shooting from panels in the wall, and only one of the soldiers in the front was moving. Amber grabbed the bag of their belongings and turned toward the young soldier coming from the front of the shuttle.

"Lieutenant Gosselin, Reynolds is out cold in the front. I patched up his head wound with what medigel we had, but he's not responsive. What's our next move?"

"We keep these kids safe is what we do. Anderson trusted us with this, so that's what we'll do. You go with them to find an evac route, I'll scope out any hostiles." The soldier in the back said, his tone more upbeat than Amber had expected. "Keep silent on comms unless you get cornered and need support. I'll try and give you as much time as possible."

"Sir," the younger soldier stammered. "I'm sure there's a terminal nearby for us to call for assistance."

"They used damn EMP charges, Flores. Our Omni-tools are browned out for who knows how long. They've got expensive shit. There's a good chance that any major terminal will be watched or guarded, so just get them hidden away and safe. Now go, they'll be on us quickly." The older soldier remarked, pulling on his helmet and kicking open the door. "You girls will be fine, you hear?" He stepped away from the shuttle, out of sight. The younger soldier grabbed his own rifle and ushered the two kids out of the vessel.

The shuttle had crashed into what seemed to be an old retail store. It was abandoned, nothing on the toppled shelves, and dust billowing in the air. The soldier grabbed Melody's hand and sprinted through the aisles toward an old exit sign, leading them both out a door and into an alley. Gunfire rang out nearby, but the soldier was unfazed, rushing them down alley by alley.

Skycars could be heard overhead, swarming the area, masking the sound of the gang members who rounded the corner in front of the trio. The soldier shoved the girls lightly behind a dumpster and dove into a small descending stairwell as he rolled a small object along the ground. The approaching gang members were caught flat-footed as the grenade erupted mere inches from them, the carnage turning their bodies into unrecognizable masses.

The soldier quickly emerged and pulled them from cover, again sprinting down the alley. Amber's footing held this time, even as she struggled to keep pace with the two others. Her lungs would have screamed were they able to, and were they not being chased by the same thugs that had incapacitated them before. Luckily, the soldier slowed to a halt and knelt beside a nearby building, quickly assessing the state of its window grating. He knocked a few stray shards of broken glass from the window behind the grate onto the floor inside, and bent the grate open further, providing enough room for the girls to squeeze through.

"You two, crawl in here. I'll close it up after you." He urged, motioning them to move in through the window. Amber tossed her bag in and helped guide Melody in quickly afterward. Shouts rang out from somewhere nearby down the alley, and the soldier held Amber firm against the wall, trying to obscure the both of them as best as possible behind some debris. Two gang members were visible, but it wasn't difficult to imagine more were nearby.

"Look, if I shoot them here, they'll know you were near here. I'm going to sneak backward and make some noise down that side alley and draw them away. I want you to crawl in there as soon as I move." He whispered, before pressing a pistol into the brunette's hands. "In case they find you. Some protection." Amber nodded, grimly. _He's going to die, just like the other one. Why are people always dying around me? I…_ She felt a light slap on her face as the soldier quietly pointed to the window and counted down with his fingers. As his hand became a fist, she slowly eked her way into the window, and the soldier gently guided the grate against the wall before escaping from view. Moments later, the gang members rushed past, yelling, gunfire ringing out soon after.

And then there was silence.

* * *

**A/N: So I'm sorry for the long wait…a deadly combination of writer's block and working extra shifts kind of did me in for a bit. I'm still not happy with the whole shuttle/escape segment, but that probably comes with the fact that I had to rewrite it twice, and I kind of forced it out this morning. It's not my best writing, but I've been sitting on this chapter for nearly a week now. That segment was the only thing holding me back, so I just needed it out of the way so I could move on. I apologize for how poorly written it is, I just kind of stopped caring enough to keep fixing it. **

**So thanks for your patience :) I hope some of your interest in further Amber backstory was sated a bit. **

**Again, I must thank everyone who's been awesome enough to read my story and provide feedback. Despite that last scene, I feel I'm getting a better handle on writing this story, and that I'm improving, albeit slightly. Couldn't do it without you, so thanks to Ankamius and Shadowblazer for your in depth critiques, which have helped me get a better grasp on writing effectively, even if I may not have showed it consistently throughout this chapter. Thanks again to Salser, Helljumper 1337, Theodosius, Exar Kun IV, Theodur, dpmeggers, ObsG, gearseffect and PMC65 for your feedback and inspiration! You all keep me motivated, and I can't properly put into words how much I appreciate your support and the fact that you take time out of your day to read my crazy little story.**

**So yeah, thanks! I hope to have another chapter up fairly soon. Should be a slow week. Who knows, though. *shrug***

**Also, thanks to Salser and ObsG again for pointing out some minor issues, which I've since amended a little :)  
**


	8. Chapter 8

_Late May 2168_

* * *

The following weeks hadn't been easy; the city was largely a slum on the ground level, the only areas spared from squalor were the downtown core, the odd gated community, and the larger parks. Many businesses had crept up toward the sky, in the glimmering spires that populated the core of the city, leaving the centuries old infrastructure of Ottawa behind to fester for the most part. The more Amber and Melody had gone out to explore, the further they ventured, the more they realized the magnitude of control the Reds had over the area. Their spray tags were on most buildings, their members filling the remaining local businesses, and the police were certainly not the primary form of local protection. The Reds were a gang, but they were an entrenched community as well. _Had they not tried to, you know, kill us, I'd probably try to get their help too. _

It had taken a week of scrounging off dropped scraps and narrowly avoiding the Reds before the girls had discovered the edge of the city's core. The contrast was unsettling for Amber; one side had sparsely traveled streets trod on by the impoverished and homeless, while the other was heavily populated by vast amounts of well-fed and busy individuals. _How could a span of five hundred meters bring such a difference?_ The morning would find droves of the homeless flocking toward the core, attempting to find sustenance in whatever form came their way. Pure money was difficult to come by; many people only transferred funds electronically, and while the UNAS still used Dollars as their regional currency, it was not common in physical form. Amber and Melody had braved the crowds for the soup kitchen twice before realizing it was more often than not a waste of time, considering they often ran out of food quickly, long before they would get any.

The downtown core was also, like the parks, something of a controlled area; the police would not so kindly usher the homeless out of the more populated areas when spotted. In the parks, the girls could pass as playful kids who may have rolled in the mud a bit too much, but in major retail centres, their social standing was rather obvious. It made stealing and begging rather difficult. Melody had been certain that, being children, they would be noticed and more readily given help, but their size only made them easier to ignore. Eyes would glance around them, ears would feign deafness, bodies would numbly and obliviously brush past them. Their time in the orphanage held an undercurrent asserting they weren't wanted, but having been exposed to the outside world, it was an ugly fact of life that they would have to swallow.

Amber perched herself on the edge of the sidewalk, watching the crowds while Melody traded in the scrap metal they had collected. _Should earn us some nutrient paste. Horrible stuff, but it's cheap and healthy._ Her thoughts were interrupted as a small family walked past her on the opposite side of the road, heading toward the nearby park. _They probably don't sit down every day and eat nutrient paste. They probably don't even have stew or soup…they probably have ham, or something amazing._

Amber sighed as they slowly walked out of sight, past a large hedge. _They seemed happy…I mean, I'm happy enough, and I'm not starving all the time…we're making our way, I guess, but I wish…I wish I could make it easier for her. There's only so much scrap metal we can find just laying around…and it's only going to get hotter outside. We're going to have to find some other way of getting food. _

There were other ways, Amber knew. The girls had come across a number of homeless who weren't under the thumb of the Reds, notably an older bearded man who had offered to teach them how to catch and cook squirrels and cats. Melody had refused it on the grounds that those animals were too adorable to be eaten; Amber was certain Melody's views on reincarnation also added to her fervent disapproval. He had also given them the tip on trading in scrap metal, but it was a temporary thing. _Every day, we find less and less, soon enough we won't have enough to afford a single meal._

Amber sensed Melody's form slump onto the curb beside her, and felt a head rest against her shoulder; the redhead's locks tickling the side of Amber's neck. Amber reached around the girl's waist and hugged her lightly. _Looks like we'll be finding a new way to make money sooner than I hoped._

"How much?" Amber asked softly, leaning her head against her friend's. Melody didn't speak. Her right hand slowly opened, revealing a few coins. Amber instinctively sighed, and immediately regretted it. _She deserves better. Two dollars and twenty cents won't even get two tubes of paste. I should've seen this coming. I need to be better for her. _Amber hugged Melody a little tighter, hoping to ease her concerns.

"We'll get you a tube on the way home, alright? I'll think of…"

"Can we go to the library?" Mel's voice revealed her exhaustion. They had spent nearly seven hours scouring the city for metal, and the sun was oppressively hot all afternoon. It had been a tiring day, even more so for the smaller redhead. Amber had done her best to keep the both of them in the shade as much as possible, trying to prevent heat stroke, but the lifting and carrying itself took a tool on their bodies.

The brunette nodded, helping pull Melody to a standing position. The library wasn't too far of a walk, and with the sun setting on the horizon, it would be a cooler one. "Are you going to be able to stay awake enough to walk home with me? I mean, that's my only worry."

Melody nodded slightly, smirking. "You worry too much." Her words implied a joking confidence, but Amber knew her friend wouldn't likely make it back that night. She could barely stand without help; it would be a miracle if she didn't fall asleep while walking to the library. Amber raised her left eyebrow and offered her a skeptical grin. _Eh, I guess I'll have to improvise. What's the worst that can happen?_

"You're gonna have to stay awake long enough to show me the way, though." Amber noted, laughing as she helped her green-eyed friend down the walkway.

* * *

The library was a fairly large building; its concrete build and stocky, angular construction standing in contrast with the tall, modern skyscrapers beside it. It offered a wealth of information that the girls had not known existed prior to their first visit; even with the shift to electronic record-keeping taken place long ago, the library was still seemingly overflowing with a mixture of datapads and books. More importantly, at least on this day, the library was cool from the temperature regulators throughout the facility.

The girls quickly entered and located the nearest seating area they could find, practically collapsing onto it in sheer giddiness of the cool air around them and the exhaustion they both were feeling. Their limbs ached and it was all they could do to put themselves in a normal seated position while their bodies recuperated. Their reprieve was fairly quickly interrupted by a young, determined looking blonde woman wearing a form of ID around her neck, who had marched over to them upon their arrival.

"If you are to make a mess, ladies, I would ask that you do it outside. This is a library, not a park." The woman said curtly, her steely gaze passing from one disheveled girl to another. Amber tensed at the unexpected confrontation. Their last visit wasn't nearly as hostile.

"We just walked a few kilometers in blazing heat, miss. I'm sure you can give us a break. We're not just here to cool off, we're here to learn too." Amber said, trying to be diplomatic, but the woman before them did not seem swayed.

"You should have learned to at least take a shower before coming here. I will ask again that you please leave the building. Your filth is getting all over the upholstery."

Melody slowly started to rise, but Amber gently guided her back onto the padded bench. Amber's jaw stiffened as she spoke. "I…apologize…for being a little dirty and sweaty, but I didn't see any sign saying we couldn't come in. Sorry to disappoint you, but we came here to study, and we will."

The woman gave an exasperated sigh. "If you don't leave now, I'll have to inform the guards. You're not wanted here."

Amber flinched and, feeling a new burst of energy, quickly rose from her seat, meeting the woman's eyes with a fierce glare. She felt the familiar pins and needles sensation course across her body as her mind raced over what to do.

"On the contrary, Laura, they are exactly the kind of people we want here." A voice cut through the tension as an elderly man slowly made his way over to the group. "Children need knowledge in order to grow and reach their potential. You were a child not long ago, lest you forget." The gentle chidings sent the younger librarian rigidly marching back to her post at the desk, where some patrons were waiting to take out some old looking books. Amber felt the tingling sensation slowly subside as she sat back down beside Melody.

The old man turned his gaze to the tired young girls and gave a reassuring smile. "You're welcome here. If any of the other workers give you trouble, just come directly to me. Don't worry about the bench, perhaps the cleaning staff will actually have to earn their wages tonight." He said with a mischievous wink. "Now, is there anything old Joel can help you girls find to start off with, or will you be exploring our archives on your own?"

Amber looked at her redheaded friend for an answer, but Melody's eyes were glued on the floor. "I…uh…was wondering if you could help me find…information about writing." Melody stammered, her nervousness shaking her voice slightly.

"Ah, a budding novelist perhaps?" the man asked. Melody just sat there, silent.

_It's been a bad day, that damn woman must have upset her_. Amber thought to herself, casting a harsh glance in the direction of the younger librarian, before softening it and turning it to the older man. "Mel's got a great imagination, she's just…it's been a hard day." Amber said, finding her friend's hand and holding it in hers. The older man nodded his head and motioned them to follow him.

"I've got a few old books in mind that you might enjoy, young lady. Please, if you would allow me to guide you."

Amber stuck around until Melody had felt better and was deep in discussions over style of prose with the aging librarian. Realizing she was clearly out of her depth, and that her friend was fine, she left to wander the expanse of the library. Her initial goal had been to brush up on her basic education, but her brain was too fried to do too much of that. Instead, she found herself wading through the aisles, eventually ending up in a section about the history of music. Amber found a comfortable chair to sit on and casually skimmed through a tome detailing the origins of music as a performance art. Amber didn't understand much of it; her notion of music was often restricted to the sounds of nature outside and the odd dull tune coming from an orphanage worker's headset. She was less interested in the information than how comfortable the chair was, and the fact that the words were slowly lulling her to sleep.

A dull knock on the desk beside her roused her from her nap, the sudden interruption causing her to drop the large book that had already been threatening to fall off her lap. Bleary-eyed, she looked up and noticed Joel, the elderly librarian, was standing in front of her.

"My apologies, child, but we'll be closing down for the night soon. Is there anyone I can call to pick you and your friend up?" he asked politely. Amber rubbed the sleep from her eyes and slowly shook her head.

"We…we should be fine, sir." Amber stated, groggily. The man looked confusedly as her and checked his chrono.

"It's nearly midnight, young one. You two are in no state to walk home, let alone be out in the city in the wee hours of the night. Certainly, your parents must be worried sick. It would make me feel better to see you taken home." He noted with audible concern.

Amber was too tired to think straight, and couldn't find a way around the question, so she just shrugged and tried again. "We'll be fine, thanks though. Just…give us a minute and we'll be on our way."

Amber started to lift herself off the chair, but the older man placed a hand on her shoulder, keeping her in place. "A number, please. It's not safe this time of night." His voice was firm with conviction. _No way around this, I guess. I feel like crap and there's no way I'm pushing my way out of this, even considering how old this guy is. _

"I don't have a number to give you. I don't think you'll need me to fill in the blanks." She said as nonchalantly as she could. "So you don't need to worry. I know it's not safe, but we'll be fine. We know the way home."

The old man stood silent for a few moments before shaking his head. "There are few areas that the cleaning staff don't get around to each night…one of those is the stairwell leading to the roof. You two children can sleep there for the night. I will try to find a blanket for you to sleep on… I can't imagine concrete is comfortable."

Amber looked skeptically at him, and shifted in her seat. "Thanks for the offer, but we can't afford to get caught. Like I said, we'll…"

"You two girls are dead tired, that much is plain, so forgive me when I say I do not believe you. I will not take no for an answer. I will ensure the top of the stairwell is not cleaned tonight. You will be safe. In the morning, you may go where you wish, but tonight, you will rest here. Am I clear?"

Amber took note of how feeble her body felt, and how her head was still swimming in drowsiness. It would be a challenge to get home like this, and just as much of a risk as staying in the library. _Maybe just one night… _She looked up at the librarian and frowned slightly.

"Fine. We'll stay the night." She said, begrudgingly. The old man simply nodded and walked off.

* * *

The night was rather uneventful; the whirring of the power washers had been dull enough for them to sleep soundly, and by the time they woke, it was already mid morning. The girls both decided to get some food and take the day off, hoping to figure out what to do next; Melody had confessed she wasn't up for another round of metal salvaging after the previous day's failure, so Amber decided a few hours at the nearby Major's Hill Park would help them recuperate.

While Melody journeyed amongst the many forms of lilies nearby, Amber sat against a tall oak, admiring the sight in front of her_. I don't know how she does it. We've only been on the streets for about a month, and we're already low on ways to get food. We're tired, hungry, and it's a struggle not getting kicked from downtown. Yet, there she is, dancing around and smelling the flowers._ Amber shook her head, unable to contain an infectious grin as Melody skipped animatedly over to her. _What keeps her going?_

"I didn't know there were so many kinds of flowers! There's like, twelve of them here, and that's just lilies! That's not even roses or daisies or anything!" she said excitedly, as she gently flopped onto her belly in front of her hazel-eyed friend. "This park is so much better than any of the orphanage yards I've been to. It's just so alive here."

Amber looked around at the park, taking in all the details she could. It was fairly busy, due to the wonderful weather, with couples and families prominently spread around the grassy area. There were vendors in the distance selling food and drink to parched individuals, and the odd photographer on the railing taking pictures of the river and the historic Parliament buildings. Songbirds and ravens flew through the warm afternoon air, while squirrels scoured the ground and tulip beds for food. _She's kinda right, I guess. This place is…really nice. But… _Amber's mind returned to her previous train of thought.

"Mel, are you happy?" Amber asked, her voice soft with uncertainty. Melody planted her elbows in the ground, propping her head up with her hands.

"What do you mean?" she responded, concern lining her face. She had a feeling Amber was going to unintentionally spoil the moment a little. Amber turned her head to the side slightly, looking out toward the river.

"I mean…We're living alone on the street, barely eating, and we're basically surrounded by the Reds. Are you happy, living like this? Yesterday…"

"Was just one day, Birdy. We have a lot more to go, and I'm sure we'll make it. Besides, the orphanages would feed us maybe once a day, once every other day. We might have a bunch of gang members around, but they haven't noticed us. We've been doing that for a month. And most importantly…" Melody crawled on her stomach toward Amber and paused at her feet before quickly pulling off her loosely-tied, worn-out sneakers.

"…I've got your shoes!" she said before scrambling away, laughing giddily. Amber quickly took off after her, jokingly promising revenge.

* * *

The girls spent the rest of the afternoon enjoying themselves in the park before heading home. The walk home was always long, especially with the detours they took in attempt to avoid detection by the Reds; they would often return home three hours after they had departed. It was an unpleasant journey, as both enjoyed each other's company, but it was more often than not a tense one.

They exited from the old transitway tunnel and ascended up the ridge; this path led them past some of the local homeless who weren't aligned with the Reds. Amber's logic dictated that if they spotted that the group was missing or depleted, the way wasn't safe, and the two would have to take an alternate route. Tonight, the group was there in force, huddling around their makeshift fire pit. As the girls went to walk cautiously by, a low gravelly voice called them over to the group. Amber turned her head and noticed an older bearded man was waving them over; as her eyes adjusted to the light, she realized it was the same man who had told them to pick up scrap for money, and who had tried to convince the girls of hunting.

The two cautiously approached the group, remaining a few meters apart from the crouched and sitting forms in front of them.

"You ladies have much luck today? That scrap business workin' out fer ya?" he asked, his words genuine and hopeful. Amber lightly ground her boot in the ground and lowered her head slightly.

"Not really. Kind of dried up in the last few days. Can't really live off that right now, and it's a bit tiring." She confessed. I don't like admitting I'm weak, so this guy had better give us something new or let us go quickly.

"Aye, it does that sometimes. Yer gonna need to find something else, then, I s'pose." He said, giving a casual shrug. A woman beside him gave him a light prod, seeming to be annoyed at him.

"Dale, why don't you tell'em. There's enough to spare to feed two twigs like them, and you know it." She turned her head to the young girls and gave them a reassuring smile. "They need it, just look at'em."

The older man gave the woman a stern look, but the woman didn't flinch. Amber stepped forward a little, gaining a little nerve. "Tell us what?" It was a simple question, but the man didn't seem to be pleased about it.

"Yer in no place to make demands, kitten. I've tried to help you girls in what ways I could, already." He said, taking a bit of some tube shaped food Amber had never seen.

"I'm not demanding, I'm just asking. If I want to leave, I will. If I want to stay, I will." Amber knew she had no way of back up what she said any more than a mouse could threaten a lion, but she stood her ground.

The man finished what he was eating and began to make his way over to them before the woman by his side intercepted him, pulled him aside, and whispered in his ear. Soon, his tense form relaxed, and the fire in his eyes cooled. He nodded and the woman approached the two girls.

"There's a diner that just went twenty four hours two dozen or so blocks from here. They haven't been able to get any new dumpsters, so a lot of his leftovers have spilled into his old, safer waste bins. We've been harvesting it nightly for nearly a week now. He goes outside every hour or two to toss some food out, so it's mostly fresh. It's…probably not going to stay like this for long, but you two look hungry, and there's plenty of food. It doesn't seem well known yet." She informed the girls, offering directions to the diner before returning back to the fire pit with her companions. The girls thanked her and quickly made their way toward the diner.

* * *

About halfway to their destination, Amber stopped Melody, pulling her into a narrow alley. Melody gave Amber a confused look; she'd been the better scout of the two since they had left the hospital, often noticing any Reds long before Amber would have. She mouthed 'What?', her face growing more uncertain by the second. 'Did you see someone?'

Amber shook her head lightly. "That's my worry. We haven't seen anyone. This is Reds territory, and we haven't seen anyone around, only the odd person walking by. Not a single pack of them. I haven't seen a single vest tonight, have you?" she asked quietly, keeping her eyes on the entrance of the alleyway.

Melody stood silent for a moment and nodded. "No, I haven't seen any Reds at all. Maybe they're out somewhere?"

"What if this diner doesn't exist? What if we wind up walking into one of their main blocks? Those other homeless had a lot of food, Mel. You think they got it by safely dumpster diving?" Amber said, hoping she was wrong. _It's a big risk straying this far from our home_. Amber's gut wanted her and Mel to turn and run back as quickly as possible, but they were more than halfway to the diner, and if it was a trap, they were likely already in the spider's web.

"A trap? Amber, if it's a trap, we're already caught. We would have been followed since the fire pit. So let's go to the diner and trust that the food will be there." Melody's tone was a sombre, her face emotionless, bringing a slight frown to Amber's face. _She's a smart girl, I should have known she'd come to the same conclusion._ Amber tilted her head toward the street and led the redhead out, continuing on. _I don't like seeing her so serious, though. If we make it out of here, I should ask her how she's able to just flick her emotions off like that. It's like she's a different person for a few seconds._

"The only thing I trust is that you'll stick with me, Mel." Melody's head spun toward Amber at hearing those words.

"Did you trust Anderson? Do you think he set us up? That there was never a school?" Melody's words were sincere, but Amber could hear a tinge of frustration behind each syllable.

"I…I don't think he set us up. I'd like to think there was a school and he wanted to help us. I don't think he helped enough, is all. I feel bad for the men that died protecting us. So yeah, that counts for something. Would I trust him again? Only a little. He meant well, but he didn't get the job done. You make a promise, you keep it. It's simple." The words erupted from Amber as they made their way down their previously planned path. _Promises are important. If I can't earn the trust of anyone, if no one can count on me, I'd be worse than alone. I'd be a failure, and I won't be that. Not again._

Amber noticed Melody's features soften and she spoke. "Everyone tries, Amber. It's what they try to do that's important. You try to protect me and…" The redhead reached for and grabbed her friend's hand. "…and that why I trust you. Even if you're weird about it sometimes, I know you mean well."

Amber slowed her pace and lightly squeezed her friend's hand, looking into a set of shimmering emeralds as they made their way down a side street. "Mel…" Amber was at a loss for words. She wanted to thank her friend, she wanted to praise her in return, she wanted to play down her own importance, but she had always had a hard time finding words when it came to Melody and their relationship. A vast array of words spun in her head aimlessly, leaving her with nothing waiting on her tongue.

Mel waited a moment for Amber to respond further, but decided to continue spilling her thoughts. "That night when I came to you, crying my eyes out and stealing your blanket…you helped me. I worried that I was a nuisance to you like so many others, that you'd turn me away, kick me off your bed. When you took me in, I didn't know what to think. You usually tried to brush me off and you never actually came up to me and spent time with me before, so I was really confused. You were all I had left, but I wasn't sure I was anything to you." Melody said, her words wistful and delicately filling the air around them, as she pulled Amber to a stop.

"But you tried to make me feel better. You tried to make me safer. You tried to get me to leave you behind, let you die, so that I could stay alive. You tried to sacrifice yourself to save me. You never let me be alone for too long… You asked about my birthday…I don't know it." Mel noted calmly, pulling the taller brunette into a hug. Amber wrapped her arms around Melody in turn, from shock as much as pleasant surprise.

"But I do know that I got the only thing I wanted, growing up." She continued, whispering into Amber's ear, her words soft against the brunette's cheek. "I got a big sister. I got you."

Amber stood still in the embrace, the only movement being the blood flushing her cheeks. The words were unexpected, and her brain was reluctant to process them. _Big sister? That…She… _Amber remained silent for a few moments, trying to figure out what it meant to her._ I…a family…I always wanted one…to be part of one…Big sister? I…Is this a dream? _

Melody knew it would take a while for her confession to be taken in, but each passing second left her more uncertain and shaken. She wanted reciprocation; she knew it rested within Amber. As she began to release her hold on her sister, Amber immediately pulled her in tightly, forcing a gasp from her lungs as they strained a little from the vice-like grip. She could feel the brunette shaking slightly, and could feel tears drip lightly onto her shoulder.

They stood like that for what seemed like hours. Amber's mind still raced, but was quickly calming under the presence she was wrapped up in. _She's my little sister now…_ She thought, a relieved smile eagerly spreading across her face. _This feels right. God, I adore her._

"Mel…"Amber choked out, immediately realizing she'd been crying and that her words were stumbling out of her. "Mel, you don't know h-how much this means t-to me. To have a little sister…I couldn't care for you any more than I already do, but I swear… I've never been so happy!" She gently guided Melody to arm's length and laughed, her smile lighting up the night. "You're amazing, you know that?"

Mel shrugged playfully, showing off her own toothy smile. "Well, like I said a while ago, I have my talents." She joked, offering her hand to Amber. "Come on, sis, let's get some food."

Amber took her hand and caught Melody's pace but couldn't help but feel an immense weight on her chest. "Look, whatever happens at the diner, I…"

"Do you trust me, Amber?" Melody interrupted, smiling up at her.

Amber nodded, her response certain and sincere. "Always."

"I promised I'd get you to a colony someday. We'll pass through this night. We'll be fine."

The two sisters continued onward toward their destination, hand in hand. Neither knew what awaited them, but they knew that they now had something that could never be taken away from them.

* * *

The diner was a wretched old relic, its structure made of mostly rusted chrome siding that made it seem ancient. Yet, the homeless at the fire-pit had been correct; its lights were on, it was filled with customers, and there were mounds of food in bins that weren't composting dumpsters. Amber and Melody both snuck over to one of the nearby bins and quietly skimmed through the top layer, hoping to find something relatively uneaten.

As Melody grabbed for what seemed to be an undamaged orange, they both heard a door on the restaurant violently swing open, slamming against the wall. The girls quickly lifted their heads and noticed a number of people flooding out from the diner, donning their red and black leather vests, as more blocked their exit, arriving in skycars behind them.

_Well, fuck._ Amber thought, noticing the leading Red from the hospital breaking from the pack that had quickly encircled them, slowly stepping toward the girls. _No cigarette this time,_ she noticed.

"Oh hey, look what we have here!" he yelled dryly to his companions. "It's those girls I told to stay put. The very same who were told they would suffer consequences if they didn't." The man pulled out a retractable baton and admired it, having stopped moving toward Amber, who had positioned herself in front of Melody.

"See, I like this thing. It's simple, and it's fitting. You were given a single task…wait. You would have gone a while without food, but you would have found that being in good relations to us was beneficial to you. A simple task. A simple punishment. I admit, we were slow in catching you…I don't even know why you came over here, but I'm not going to complain. You didn't exactly hide, but that doesn't matter. We were slow to catch you, so it'll be a damn slow night for you two. Lucky for you two, some people still want to get a hold of you, so you won't die…yet." He said grimly, slowly stalking toward the girls. "But you might wish you had by morning."

He was fast, whipping the baton toward Amber and easily crashing down upon her shoulder, buckling the young girl. Her skin immediately felt a little painful as the familiar pins and needles sensation flooded her, and it only increased as another blow rained down on her back. Hearing Melody's screams, she felt electric; the pain was still there but it seemed less important than the sound of her blood pumping through her skull. Instinctively, she rolled to her left, dodging another powerful attack, and sprung at him. The man, who was mid-swing, fell off balance as the girl collided with him, knocking them both down. He quickly retaliated, landing a kick to Amber's face as she rose, swiftly knocking her back.

He was on her in an instant, his weight too much for the girl to shrug off, no matter her efforts. A knife pulled harshly against her face, carving a large wound from the middle of her left cheek diagonally down to the joint of her jaw. The pain was blinding, her lungs aching from her anguished cries. For a moment, the air around her body burned and pulsated against her skin, and for a moment she willed herself one last attempt to fight back against the man.

Melody, herself restrained by a number of Reds, watched in horror as the man from the hospital stuck his dagger into her sister's face. She watched Amber writhe in pain, attempting to escape, but it was futile. _I can't watch anymore of this!_ As her eyes closed, she saw a blue hue take over the familiar orange and black. Opening her eyes, she witnessed Amber wreathed in blue; still on the ground, but the man was a good five meters away, slumped against a wall. The Reds had responded cautiously; some moving to their leader, some to the other hostage, and the rest moving towards the fallen girl, who was struggling to stand.

Amber felt pure unadulterated rage and pain coursing through her body as her mind swam. She shook her head in an attempt to clear her vision, and saw a group of Reds quickly approaching. Her body moved instinctively, running toward the offenders before she felt her legs give an extra push. She recoiled as she found herself crashing forward into the group at an immense speed, knocking them away violently onto the ground. The burning sensation quickly fizzled away from her shock, and before she could comprehend what she'd just done, she felt something come crashing down again onto her injured shoulder, forcing her back to the ground.

"Fuck, they're going to pay nicely for you." She heard from above her as she squirmed beneath his boot. She tried to get a better look around her, trying to spot her sister to no avail.

"You seem to have forgotten, Finch. We have already paid you." The voice was fairly distant, but firm, with an air of arrogance. "And if you insist on holding our subjects hostage…why, it would be a shame for your organization's UNAS leadership to learn you have betrayed the trust of your primary investors. I'm sure you're capable of handling the fallout, if you've decided this is your best course of action."

A tall caramel skinned woman approached the bedlam with a troupe of guards and playfully shooed Finch off the wounded and exhausted brunette. "Smart decision, Finch. The next time you decide to catastrophically bungle up one of our contracts, please remind yourself that you are not entitled to the spoils of your failure." She motioned for a few of her guards to collect the small redhead. "Though I'll admit, it HAS been entertaining, watching your attempts at trying to catch two orphaned little girls. Strange that your organization is capable of infiltrating governments, but you can't catch two children on your own. I doubt you would have noticed them stealing from the dumpsters had I not tipped you off beforehand."

The woman flipped Amber over onto her back and pulled out some Medigel, applying it onto the bleeding facial wound. "Hold still, child." She softly requested, pulling her own black hair out of her face so she could see her application better. The wound was large, and Finch has cut a thin chunk from her face rather than a mere slit. He was audible off to the side, attempting to rationalize his arguments, but she didn't quite care to hear his excuses. _His group had botched a simple eezo exposure, instead crashing the vessel into the orphanage and killing most of our subjects in the process. It was inexcusable, and such failure will be punished,_ she thought to herself as she checked the girl for any other wounds, and injected her with a moderate painkiller_. It took a lot of planning to split that sample group from the rest of the population, it had taken a nice bit of blackmail, but the results would have been worth it… had the Reds not monumentally failed at their simple task. The gang wrote their own punishment, publically attacking Alliance vessels. That would cause a full out war, for certain. _

Feeling that she had done all she could, the woman gingerly lifted Amber to her feet and motioned for her guards to let the redhead join them. "You two look like you're starving. How about we get you some food?"

The girls looked at the woman, shellshocked about the entire event. She motioned the two to follow her and a few guards into the diner. In their confused state, they could barely hear the rain of gunshots behind them.

"They won't bother you anymore. Of that, I am certain." The woman spoke confidently, guiding them into a booth. "Now, what would you like to eat?"

* * *

**A/N: Wow, I did not expect this chapter to be so huge. I'd planned on a shorter 3500 word one, but I didn't feel right leaving it off before heading to the diner. So I just kept going. I've been awake for about thirty five consecutive hours now, so I maybe have struggled with sentence structure late in the game, especially with it being a slight action scene. I hope the fairly forced exposition didn't seem unnecessary. I figured it best to lay some groundwork for the character, and thought it would be fine to fill in some blanks while I was at it.**

**So, uh, yeah. Long chapter. A doozy, I guess. The earth saga of my fic will be ending within a few chapters, and I've been considering spending much less time on the military arc. I kind of want to get to the Mass Effect timeline before mid August when I go on a bit of vacation, and I'm unsure I can do that now. So, weigh in on that, if you have any strong opinions. I'm all ears :)**

**As always, thanks to everyone who's been giving feedback, and who have favourited/alerted my story :) It motivates me more when I know there are others enjoying my story, so I probably wouldn't be this far in had you all not helped me out :)**

**Also, lots of credit to the Fanfic Writer's Support thread over on BSN. Pop on by if you feel like talking about writing in general, issues you're having with your fic, fun things you're enjoying with your fic, what fics you're enjoying, bits about lore, or just plain discussion :) It's fun times, and I'm Fluffywalrus over there (hrm...yet I haven't written anything remotely fluffy as of yet!)**

**Unsure when the next one will be up. Big week coming up, with Canada Day and all, so I'll see what I can do :)**

**Thanks again for taking the time to read my story, and as always, feedback gives me the warm fuzzies and is greatly appreciated :D**


	9. Chapter 9

Amber stared in awe at the plate in front of her; she could feel its warmth caressing her face, and the smell was intoxicating. All the years she had spent in orphanages had kept her knowledge of food to a minimum, and the aroma nearly overwhelmed her senses. _Two months of nutrient paste can make anything seem tasty, but this…I don't know what it is, but it looks and smells really good._ Amber hadn't known what to order; the menu she was handed had names and pictures that meant nothing to her. She recognized that there were some soups, but she wanted to know what all the food on the menu was. She chose a strange circular food named 'pizza', mostly because it had a number of other foods in it. _I know I like ham, but…that pepperoni stuff looks weird, and apparently those yellow things are pineapple. I don't know what that white stuff covering it is, but I think it's all just a bunch of food tossed on some bread, really. Seems easy enough. _She'd been advised to let it cool slightly before eating it, so she glanced over to Melody.

In front of her sat a strawberry milkshake and plate with a hamburger and fries. The woman had recommended the combination after the redhead nervously confessed she didn't know what foods would be good. Both girls looked warily at the drink, thinking it resembled the texture of nutrient paste a little too closely. That it had a straw, which Amber had used in her first week at the hospital to ingest the paste, only made Melody more cautious. Also curious were the various bottles of liquids at the end of the table, which also reminded them of the paste. _I swear, whoever invented nutrient paste deserves a future eating nothing but the curry chicken tubes. Ugh, it's like I see it everywhere…it's haunting me._

Amber watched Melody clamp her hands on the hamburger and slowly raise it to her mouth, sweat beading on her forehead. The redhead closed her eyes tightly and took a small bite; almost immediately her eyes sprung open, smirking a little as she chewed. She swallowed and turned to Amber, satisfaction seeming to radiate from her.

"This is REALLY good, Bir…um, Amber. You wanna try?" she asked, offering out the burger. Amber shrugged, taking it into her hands and prying a small chunk off with her teeth. The taste was relatively foreign, the texture was much different than the ham she'd had, and there had been an odd crunch as she had bit through the ingredients. Still, she felt she'd had a stew with a similar ingredient to the main patty before. _Wow, this is pretty incredible!_ Amber nodded enthusiastically at Melody, who'd been trying to gauge her sister's reaction. "This is really good, Mel!"

Melody had been chomping on a fry and offered some of those to Amber, but the brunette waved them away politely. "If I keep eating your food, then you'll have to dip into this…" she said, motioning to the pizza in front of her. "Which I'm not really sure will taste good."

"It should be cool enough to eat by now. It probably won't burn you or anything." The woman across from them had been silent for most of the duration they'd spent in the diner, usually fiddling away on her omni-tool, but she was staring indifferently at the young brunette. "But I'd try not to chew too much. Your cheek's not in the best shape. I'll take a better look at it when you're done eating."

Amber used her tongue to probe the inside of her cheek where the gash had been. There was a dull ache as it rubbed over the hardened gel that had closed the narrow opening. Everything felt kind of numb, so she assumed she was on some form of medication like she was at the hospital. Looking to her pizza, she pondered over how to eat it. _It's a circle, I guess, and there's a bunch of weird lines. Do I pull pieces off? Do I need a fork? Why don't I have a fork? I think I could probably grab the edge of the bread…_

She slowly pulled a slice away from the whole, and looked confusedly over the tendrils of cheese, stretching in attempt to remain connected to the main portion. Eventually, the cheese gave way, and Amber looked it over; the slice was still quite warm, and it smelled even better the closer it was to her face. Reveling in the scent, she brought the slice to her mouth and gave a generous bite. For a few moments, she sat in silence; wide-eyed and mouth closed.

_This is what heaven tastes like. This must be what rich people eat every day. When I get older, I'm going to eat pizza every day._

Amber gently chewed and swallowed the portion and looked over at Melody, who was dipping her fries into a puddle that looked like a mixture of nutrient paste and blood.

"Mel, you need to try this, it's the best thing ever."

The food was devoured by the young girls, even the milkshake, which Melody happily milled away at once she realized its sweet flavour. The table fell silent as the dishes were taken away by some guards. Once she was pleased with her patchwork first aid on the girl's cheek, the woman shut down her omni-tool interface and leant back, resting her hands behind her head.

"So…" Amber said, breaking the silence, "I guess, thanks for the…uh…food. And for fixing my face up." She nervously rubbed the back of her neck, unsure what the woman wanted from them.

"I think you missed the part where I rescued you from the Reds, my dear." The woman noted humourously, as she closed her eyes.

Amber straightened her posture, feeling more than slightly annoyed. "I heard you say you told them we were coming, so I'm not gonna thank you for that."

The woman gave a hearty laugh and stared at Amber intently. "Here I thought you weren't paying attention! Oh I suppose my mouth does get me in trouble sometimes. Yes, yes, that was certainly my fault, I've no use fishing for compliments now. Anyway, this food was the least I could do considering you've been living in abject poverty the past month."

"So you did this just to be…nice?" Melody asked quizzically. The woman shook her head slowly and sat forward, leaning her elbows on the table.

"No, no. The Tenth Street Reds needed a little reality check. Finch over there, the man who attacked you, just lost a lot of men under his watch for his insolence. I'm certain he'll be dealt with. " the woman said, seemingly taking pleasure in recalling the night's events.

Amber took a quick moment to look over the woman and her guards. They look more like military than a gang. _Maybe Anderson was right…_

"So you were the other group chasing after us since the orphanage…and the Reds worked for you?" Amber asked warily. The woman gave no visible reaction as she snapped her fingers at a guard. Moments later he returned with a cup of coffee, which sat untouched in front of her.

"I don't make a habit of discussing business with children." She said, gazing at the cup in front of her.

"But you did. You told us about the Reds, so…whatever. It's because of my…" Amber's voice trailed for a moment as she tried to recall the word Anderson had used. "…my Biotics. Right? You're trying to bribe me with food." Amber retorted, her voice slightly hardening._ I'm not going to be bought and have a bunch of needles stuck in me or anything, even if the food is amazing. _

"To my credit, it was enjoyable food." The woman joked, raising the cup to her mouth and sipping from it, before returning it to its saucer. "But yes. That is the main reason why we're here. We've been trying to keep biotic children safe, but it's often difficult to tell biotic individuals from non-biotics. We had a feeling, after your escape and the…rather mangled corpse of one of the distinguished Reds…that one of you had biotic abilities. Tonight merely proved our theory."

Amber shook her head slightly. "No, that doesn't make sense. There were people from the Alliance worried because…well, some group apparently abducted us and other orphans, and would probably run tests on us or something. That doesn't sound too good to me, and if you're part of that group, then I don't get how you'd be keeping us safe."

The woman merely nodded slightly and paused for a moment before continuing. "Are you girls aware of how biotics are treated by the rest of the world?" Both girls shook their heads, interested in where she was going with the discussion. "They are treated like dirt. What you have experienced on the street…even if you were rich, you would still be hated, feared, distrusted. People would avoid you and blame you for their bad fortune, they would call you thieves and liars and demons. Biotics are not loved, and outside of trained service, are generally forced to the edges of society. We bring biotics into a more welcoming environment, where they can be themselves and prosper with their new abilities."

The woman paused, staring carefully at both girls, who didn't seem too impressed.

"And yes, there will be some hard times. We don't test biotics so much as we train them. The military recruits have to go through the rigors of their training program…we merely have our own. It's rather similar. You will be given living quarters, food, and protection, all while learning how to harness your abilities. " she explained, as the girls shifted in their seats slightly. Melody sent Amber a look of uncertainty, her hair hiding her face from the woman. Amber, in turn, gently grasped her sister's hand and gave it a light, knowing squeeze._ I need to hear her side, Mel. You taught me to give people chances to trust them._

"And Mel? She would have to come too." Amber said, simply. The woman nodded expectantly.

"Of course. Even if she didn't have biotic potential, if she's important to you, then we can protect her until you're able to on your own."

Amber recoiled slightly at the words. _I know I can be pretty obvious at times, but she either reads me really well, or something's up…_ Amber thought, recalling all the journal entries she did involving her guilt, her uncertainty, how powerless she had felt at times. _This group knows me. They've watched over me for long enough to check up on me, I guess. Did they read my journals? I never really paid attention to the ones I'd filled. Did they ask previous orphanage workers? Emily from St. Paul's? Or…is she just taking a guess?_

Amber brought her hand to her chin, thinking her options over. _Melody doesn't seem real comfortable with these people. They are a little…weird. And trigger happy._

"And if I say we'd rather live on the streets without your help?" Amber asked candidly, clutching Melody's hand as a tiny gasp erupted beside her. She noticed the woman's features harden for a split second before vanishing back to the indifferent mask she'd worn all conversation.

"Then you go free. We're not slavers. We're merely providing an option for you, a way out. Something the other forces in your lives seem to have forgotten. But if that's what you want, we'll respect that. We'll keep an eye on you to ensure you aren't in terrible danger, and that the Reds don't retaliate, but other than that, you can go free right now if you like. The door would always be open, of course."

Amber nodded and sat still in the booth for a few moments before sliding out, Melody cautiously following. "We'll be fine for now, but… we'll think about it. How can I contact you?"

The woman pulled up her omni-tool and began tapping quickly on the holo interface. Soon after, the omni-tool on Melody's arm lit up with an alert.

"I just transferred my comm number to you. Call at any time of the day, and within a few hours I'll message you back. And girls…" she noted, catching the girls' full attention. She passed a small bag to Melody, who cautiously took hold of it. "Good luck out there."

The girls nodded and slowly made their way out of the diner, watching for threats as they made their way back to their basement home.

* * *

Viola Guzman left the diner considering the possibilities left to her; the girls had rejected her offer, but that wasn't the end of it. The biotic would be a quality candidate for years, so there was no need to rush. Still, she had hoped they would accept. Viola stepped into her skycar and keyed in the location for her office_. Well, I can't say I didn't see this coming. She has displayed efforts in solely protecting her little friend…with the failure of the Alliance and our convenient entrance, it's no wonder she's as cautious as she is. Still, I think she expected a lot worse from me, so I think I left an alright impression. _

She quickly checked the new messages she had on her omni-tool, noticing a few from her Cerberus contact. It wasn't a partnership she particularly enjoyed, but it had gained her the ability to operate how she saw fit. They had helped blackmail the former Alliance representative in her project, allowing her free reign over operations, free from the Alliance's protocols.

_It had to be done. They were too sloppy…though I suppose I was too by agreeing to the Reds handling the second exposure. That was a mistake that won't be repeated. I compiled as many of the remaining potential candidates, hoping for some results. Stupid stubborn Alliance, forcing my hand…all of their theories were fruitless, absolutely no results! Who in their right mind proposes starving the children to stress their systems into a response? Absurd! No rational logic behind that assertion! Biotics NEED food to perform! These children, if they were to be biotics, they needed an extra push. They needed a healthier environment. Second exposure was an unknown, but with what we know of adult exposures now, and with the resources of the government, it would have been a formality to scan and treat the children. We would have been prepared…I WAS prepared! We needed advancement! Too many children were starving before…at least my failure hopefully provided a quicker death, if anything… and we have at least one candidate left in the program. With Cerberus, we can get humanity a more respectable position in the galaxy, we might even rival the asari biotics eventually! We just need more time and subjects…even if the cost is there. God I wish it was easier but I believe we're fighting for a better future, where biotics can be respected._

She quickly sent out a mission report, hoping it would sate Cerberus' appetite and let her get back to planning the necessary safeguards to ensure the safety of her investment. _This Amber Shepard has shown unexpected potential already. Sure, she doesn't seem capable of wielding it consciously, but she seems to, despite her condition, be able to use it freely where many would tire after a single burst. Her running attack was eerily similar to a biotic charge…amateurish and clumsy, but certainly was effective enough. I would imagine now that she did this to kill the Reds member back in April. It's worth investigating, if I can manage a way to force that ability from her in the near future. Her rudimentary push on Finch was basic, but again showed she had an innate sense of what to do. I cannot let this potential go to waste. _

She felt her skycar come to a halt as she reached her destination. She slipped out of the vessel and opened up her omni-tool to start a new message. _Luckily, contacts are easy to find, and buy. It will be a busy night…I suppose I'll sleep come morning._

* * *

Melody raised her arms up at the open window, attempting to guide Amber down into the room as gently as she could. She swore under her breath as the brunette slipped slightly, disrupting Melody's balance, and bringing both girls tumbling to the floor. Amber landed with a loud thud, her uninjured shoulder breaking the brunt of her fall. Both girls knelt and glanced at each other, making sure the other was fine. Melody slowly made her way over to Amber, noticing she was in discomfort. She gingerly eased her sister into a standing position and brought her over to their makeshift bed; a monstrosity made of coats, rocks to keep them in place, and stolen sheets from a retail store. Using Melody as a prop, she lowered herself onto her favourite side of the bed, grimacing as the minor impact of sitting on the bed sent jolts of pain through her hurt shoulder. Melody, in turn, knelt to face Amber and lightly grabbed her sister's tunic.

"I want to see your shoulder. Is that alright?" the redhead asked, concerned for the health of the girl in front of her. _She's always putting herself in harm's way for me. I hope she won't need a trip to the hospital; it's the same shoulder as before._ Amber slowly nodded, her body tensing in preparation.

Melody slowly but surely helped Amber out of the top; it had fortunately been fairly loose, but getting the injured arm out of it had been a particularly expletive-laden few moments. Melody's face knit in concern over the dark blotches spreading all over Amber's right shoulder. _That looks…like it really hurts. Oh, Amber…_Feeling tears brimming in her eyes, and noticing Amber's mood slowly darkening, she decided to try and ease the tension, lightly raising her sister's chin.

"My brave warrior princess!" Melody choked out the words as cheerfully as she could manage, tears trailing down her cheeks. Amber looked stunned for a moment before breaking out in laughter, occasionally wincing from the pain as her body shook.

"I'm pretty sure this was a lot easier than your attack on the nurse's ferocious elbow, Mel." Amber joked, raising her left eyebrow in amusement. "I…I can move it fine. It just hurts, so I probably only bruised it. I'm fine. It'll just hurt for a few days." She used her left hand to wipe her sister's tears away, hoping to ease her worries.

Melody's thoughts wandered through the day's events, each moments flickering past her, inciting a storm of emotions. _I should be terrified after the attack, I should be scared at how we'll survive now what we don't have any real way to make money…I should be scared over whether that woman will come snatch Amber away, or that people will hate Amber for her blue powers…and I kind of am terrified of it all but…but I just feel…lucky. We're alive, we have each other to get through this._

"Amber…" she whispered, leaning forward and gently wrapping her arms around her sister's waist, avoiding putting pressure on her shoulders. "Thank you."

"Mel, you don't…" Amber started, but she was quickly interrupted.

"Thank you, really. You've always been here for me. You fought to keep that man away from me, and you knew I didn't really like that woman, and you let us walk away…even knowing what she told you…what you are, I guess, and how people like you are treated…so thank you. I don't know what the future's gonna be like, and those blue powers of yours kind of worry me because I only see them when you're hurt and I don't want to see you hurt, but I know we'll be alright because you're my sister."

The brunette leaned forward into the hug embracing her sister. "Mel, for the longest time, I've…I really wanted to think of you as a little sister, but I was scared to let myself. I'm not now. You don't need to thank me for anything. And I don't know any more than you do about my biotics…they scare the crap out of me because I just kind of do them without thinking and I always feel really tired after, but I don't care about that. I don't want to be trained or anything. I won't need that where I'm going, where we're going." Releasing Melody, she slowly laid herself out on the bed, feeling a little too tired to keep sitting. "And tomorrow, we'll start on making enough money to get a shuttle off this rock. I'm tired of putting you in danger, and I just want to get us someplace where we don't have to worry about that."

Melody scoffed as she lay down directly beside Amber. She knew better than to refute her sister's claims of being put in danger. _It's just part of who she is, but it still makes me sad…I really hope one day I can get her to realize that she shouldn't blame herself for so much…for those deaths…or especially for what we've been through. I just want her to be happy and not feel she needs to prove herself. That she needs to get me to a colony world because I want to see space. _"I think food is a little more important right now than going to Eden Prime, or Mindoir, or Ferris Fields."

Amber shifted slightly in the makeshift bed, resting her forehead against her sister's; her chocolate brown curls intermingling with Melody's fiery red waves. "I dunno. I mean, we're here now, so why not look ahead? You know, every night when we come home, I look up at the sky…and I see our future in the stars. I like having that reminder, and I want to feel like we're getting closer to it, that we're one day closer to traveling past them on the way to our new home."

Melody closed her eyes and nuzzled up against her big sister. It wasn't too cold in their basement, but she wanted to be close to Amber after all that had happened that night. She mumbled in agreement to Amber's words, tiredness overcoming her. Melody was aware of her promises of colonies, aliens, space and finding a place to live out in that glorious frontier. She appreciated the sentiment, but with the warmth of her sister lulling her to sleep, she knew she'd found the only home she'd ever need.

* * *

**A/N: Short chapter today. Wanted to push it out because there will be a small time skip and it would make no sense to have one at the end of a chapter. Doesn't work. Anywho, I decided to get into a bit of detail regarding the good ol' biotic orphan program that Anderson dug up a few chapters ago. Felt like giving a bit of insight while letting you learn about a new character. Hope I pulled this chapter off, it was a lot of…I don't know. Peripheral stuff. **

**So yeah, next chapter will be….I'm not sure. I keep saying it's a busy week, but I keep writing as plans fall through. Another could come this week. I'm getting closer to the end of the Earth arc, and that means all the plot strings I've had going on will be tied up to a degree, as I've planned out in some detail. The more I think about avoiding much of the military career, the more I think it's doable, and that I'll skim over it across a chapter or two, letting some of those experiences filter in throughout the Mass effect timeline.**

**Anywho, thanks for taking the time to read! Super appreciation going out to everyone that favourites, alerts, reads or reviews this, because you all honestly motivate me to write faster and avoid writer's block. :) To all you Americans out there, I wish you an early happy Independence Day! And likely happy long weekend too :)**


	10. Chapter 10

_August 28__th__ 2168  
_

* * *

Amber slowly shifted herself from aisle to aisle, gauging the products and assessing her situation constantly. She had been to this store three times in the past months, and she hoped they would fail to recognize her for a fourth time. Her goal was always simple; find a mark, pickpocket their currency chit, and use it to pay for food, pocketing whatever remained for their future. Melody had given Amber numerous tips and lessons near the start of the summer, and the brunette almost had it down perfectly; she had been caught twice, but was able to make a quick escape on both occasions. Her mark this time was similar to most of the others she had chosen; moderate sized woman who looked well off, wearing a low hanging bag on her shoulder. Amber was fortunate that she had washed herself and her clothes in the river that day, due to how close she knew she would have to get to the lady.

She quickly sidled up to the woman as she was distracted by the contents of a sale product and inconspicuously peered into the bag, looking for a chit. _Buncha small boxes and containers, some datapads…ah! There one is!_ Amber gauged the position and depth of it before circling around the aisle and deftly pick-pocketing the chit once the woman was distracted again. She grinned as she handled her prize a few aisles away from her victim. _This is too easy sometimes, makes me wonder why people just leave these things lying around… _Amber pondered, as she made her way to pick up some cheap paste. Her grin turned into a frown as the thrill faded. _God, I can't wait until I don't have to do this…well, I guess I don't have to. _She reached and collected some orange flavoured tubes from a bin._ I mean, I really don't have to do this. I…this chit isn't mine, I wasn't given it, and I don't need it, but…I want it. I want to get out of this place, and I want to live a normal life, not…steal from people who don't deserve to be stolen from. God…I'll stop once this is over, right?_

The checkout was expedient as usual; she swiped the chit across the terminal after scanning the items, and promptly left, hoping her luck and resolve would carry over another day.

The girls met in their usual spot by the Rideau River, on a bench by the water. It wasn't a very populated spot, and if they followed the paths running through the park, they could usually get close to the edge of downtown without any harassment from the authorities. Most importantly, though, it offered a nice view. If one didn't look closely, they would simply see a wonderful, if small, green expanse, with a narrow river splitting it in half peacefully. There was the odd light pole scattered about, and a vibrant city hidden behind it, but it was nature that drew the most attention. It was a welcome reprieve after a long day of doing less than honest and inspirational activities; a small escape from the harshness of reality.

Melody, as usual had been waiting on the bench for Amber to arrive; the brunette often wondered how the tiny redhead could be so efficient, but she wouldn't complain. She often pressured the girl, trying to get Melody to take a few hours or a day off sometimes, as she wanted to make sure her sister wasn't working too hard. Such requests were never honoured, of course. Melody was as stubborn as she was in building toward their goal, their future.

Amber plopped herself down onto the bench beside her sister, handing the redhead a tube of paste. The evening light caught hold of all the edges on Melody's face, drawing a concerned frown from the brunette beside her. _She needs more food than this, _Amber thought, moving her gaze to the tube in her hand._ I mean, it's healthy, but it leaves something to be desired in how much of it there is. She needs more_. Amber felt her own face absently, her fingers cascading across her cheeks and jaw. _Heck, the stew at the orphanage filled us up more than this. I think I've lost some weight too, maybe. But Mel…_

"Hey, how about we stop off at a vending machine and grab some more food on the way back?" Amber asked, the unsaid apology quickly grabbing her sister's attention.

"This is fine, really." Melody said, reaching over and resting her hand on Amber's. "You worry too much, you know. And we're getting closer to that shuttle right? I managed to get forty-five dollars worth of chits today. If we keep this up, we'll be spending Christmas on a colony, so cheer up Birdy."

Amber gave a weak smile and nodded as she stood up. "We should probably get going, unless you want to sit here for a while longer." Melody winced slightly as she pushed herself onto her feet, providing her answer.

They walked and talked, occasionally slurping some paste as they made their way home. Since the night at the diner, their passage had been generally unhindered by the Reds; occasionally some would get in their way purposely, or call out insults at them. That said, none would actually stop them, or physically harass them, just annoy them.

"So what colony world do you think we should head to?" Amber asked as they strolled down one of the larger, half-deserted boulevards.

Melody cocked her head, scrunching her face up slightly; a sign she was deep in thought. Moments later, she glanced over to Amber. "I read in the library about Tiptree. I hear it's small, but it's supposed to be really green and pretty, and it's new. A lot of farming, and they're looking for new people to move there. It's just way out on the opposite end of the galaxy or something, so a lot of people don't really want to go there."

Amber nodded, having pegged that planet out as a possible option before. _Not my first choice, but a good one to think about. More water there than Earth, not much land, and it would be harder to move there as kids._

"Tiptree seems pretty good, but it would be tough getting in. I mean, we're just kids, right? To them, I mean." Amber said, watching the street in front of her as a small speckled orange cat darted across in front of them. "I did some looking into Drasta. It seems to have weather and seasons like here, and there's a lot of land that needs to be settled. It's really new, and like Tiptree, it's out in the ass end of nowhere. It's not as much of a draw as Terra Nova, Demeter, Eden Prime or Elysium, or even that new Watson place. It's not perfect, there's apparently some dangerous wildlife, but it's got a lot of farming like Tiptree, and they're so desperate for people to go there that they even have foster families. That could be our way in."

Melody nodded slowly. "I should read up on it tomorrow, then. I've just been doing writing worshops and looking up on Tiptree and Amaterasu, basically. That place might be good too. I think it has a foster family thing there, and it's small and it's apparently near an Alliance space station they're building, or something, so that would make it safer than most colonies, I think. At least, safer than Tiptree or probably Drasta."

Amber smiled at her sister's mention of the Alliance. _I'm sure she'd probably love a job in the Alliance, just traveling around space and seeing it all. Hell, it sounds kind of nice, really, but…I'm not sure that's the right path for me. It'd be nice to see some space elephants and medusa heads and Turians and stuff. _

"I think the only thing I don't like about Amaterasu is the weather. Apparently it's a bit hotter there than here on Earth. Not sure I'm a fan of the heat…" Amber noted, her head turning to look at her sister. _She looks pretty exhausted_. "…and from what I can see today, you wouldn't be either." Amber gave her sister a playful smile, which Melody promptly returned.

"You'd be sweating and tired too if you spent the whole day running from the police and the actual owners of these chits, with the hot sun burning you up. You can do your thing in stores," Melody said with mock scorn, "I'm the one doing all the hard work!" she finished, sticking her tongue out at her sister. Amber laughed a bit, then hugged Melody closer to her.

"Haha, yeah, well…even still, you're the one bringing in most of the money for the shuttle. Take a day off sometime, will you?" Amber asked, leaning her head against the redhead's wavy hair. Melody shrugged and took a small slurp of her tube. "And eat your paste…jeez, you've barely touched it and I'm already done. Don't tell me you like the taste…"

Melody hesitated for a moment before looking down at her tube. It was still two-thirds full, and they'd been walking for nearly an hour. "Well, at least you chose a fruity one this time. I still won't forgive you for picking up those egg salad tubes." She said, before playfully shoving Amber away, in front of her. "I'm just having too much fun talking with you. Haven't had time to eat."

"Now you're making me sound like I'm a pig or something. I mean, it's there to be eaten. May as well." Amber said, matter-of-factly. "Anyway, if we get enough money, we could delay the move to later, when we would have more money to get food and maybe some kind of shelter or whatever. Better than moving somewhere new and being dirt poor starting off. Not the best fresh…"

Amber was interrupted by the sound of clattering debris behind her. She glanced back and to the side and saw Melody with a mouth full of paste; beside her, a small pile of junk rolled and spread beside a knocked over garbage canister. Amber slowly moved her gaze from the empty tube to her sister and cocked an eyebrow at her. Melody willed herself to swallow the rest, and placed her hands on her hips.

"You told me to finish it, didn't you?" she said, her eyes glimmering with annoyance. "I just wasn't watching where I was going….I didn't mean to interrupt or anything. And I guess I can agree…we'll need some money to start off with."

"I just can't believe you finished the paste so quickly. That must be a record, or something." Amber said, giving a light laugh.

Melody smirked, righting the bin and tossing her tube in it. "Well, mark that down as just another way I'm faster than you." She said, catching up to her sister. "And those blue superpowers of yours don't count, missy!"

Amber just laughed and started going over plans for what shuttle provider they could use to get to the nearest space-port, when they were done. As they entered their abode, she looked up at the stars, knowing they were indeed one day closer. _Soon_.

* * *

Amber's eyes fluttered open, blearily attempting to reconcile the fact that she was awake and that it was still very much pitch black outside. She had always been something of a restless sleeper, constantly moving around in her sleep, her body sprawled out in every direction. Throughout her childhood, she'd often wake up numerous times a night; Melody's presence often extinguished that struggle. Amber spread her arms blindly around the bed, feeling for her sister but finding only wrinkled sheet and winter coat. _What?_

"Mel?" Amber mumbled groggily, wiping the sleep from her eyes. Theirs wasn't a large room, and a quick scan of it revealed she was the only one there. _Mel should be sleeping right now, though…I mean, she ALWAYS sleeps in, I'm always having to wake her up…where is she?_ The brunette quickly untangled herself from the sheets and tossed on her shoes, scrambling up and out of their sanctuary.

As she crawled out onto the paved alley, it was clear to her that dawn was nearly an hour away, the sky just barely lighter in the east than the west. _What the heck is she doing up this early? Maybe she went for a walk…but, no…no, she doesn't casually stroll the streets, she only does that in parks, and there aren't any near here…and the Reds are supposed to be off our backs…and that woman and her people said they'd let us be…but maybe one of them changed their mind? Fuck, where IS she? _She quickly jogged around the vicinity, hoping to catch a glimpse of her sister; hoping she was just nearby, enjoying the cool morning air.

"Mel?" Amber called out, her fear and desperation dripping from her voice. It was met with the silence of the early morning streets. She returned to her home's entrance and leaned up against the loose grate. _Maybe she left early?_ Amber pondered, trying not to panic. _Maybe she's just downtown! It's…a longshot, but maybe…I'll wait here until dawn and then…well…I'll go looking._

Amber had waited nervously, watching the sun begin its ascent into the sky until she couldn't stay still any longer. She swiftly crossed through the derelict underbelly, and blazed a trail through the downtown streets, investigating each and every one of Melody's usual hunting grounds to no avail. Her morning was further troubled by how insistent the local police had been on keeping her out of the city core, and how they continually evacuated her from the premises in a not so gentle manner. Between the unrelenting heat, the cuts and scrapes across her body, and the mounting stress over Melody's disappearance, she felt spent by late afternoon. _Welp, may as well check out the Library. At least it's an easy route, and I know the patrols_.

Carefully, she snuck back into the core, hoping her luck would change for the better, hoping her sister was safe, wherever she was.

* * *

The library was refreshingly empty; only a few visible students and a few adults were going about their business in the facility. _Should be easy to find Joel…and Melody, if she's here. Heck, even if she isn't, maybe he's seen her. That would at least make me feel better..._, she thought as she swiftly made her way to the second level, finding the writer's workshop within minutes. Normally, the aging librarian would be there helping her sister and some others, or he'd be sitting in his brown leather chair nearby, which sat vacant. Amber's brow furrowed in frustration as she made her way through the aisles, hoping for a glimpse of either of her targets. Her ears perked at a slight tinkling sound a few rows over; curious, she allowed the sound to guide her way until she came to a stop at an old wooden door_. I can barely make it out, but it sounds kind of nice, almost like birds, but deeper…different. _

Cautiously, she rapped at the door, hoping she wasn't intruding on a stranger. The sound ceased, and soon after the door slowly opened, revealing Joel. He had a puzzled look on his face, his eyes searching the space around the hazel-eyed girl in front of him.

"Not often you're the one to knock on my door. Normally, it's that young girl Melody who lugs you around with her." He said, scratching his mostly bald head. "Anyway, how can I help you, lass?"

Amber's face turned downcast, realizing the man hadn't likely seen her sister. "It's, uh, nothing I guess. Sorry I interrupted…whatever you were doing. I should go." Her words stumbled out as she turned away. The librarian stepped out of the doorway and after the young girl.

"You look rather roughed up, miss. More-so than normal, so why don't I get you looked at, and you can tell me what's troublin' you." His words slowed Ambers pace enough for him to catch up. "If it's about your friend…"

"My sister." Amber interrupted, gently, the words erupting from her mouth instinctively. The old man rested a hand on her shoulder and guided her back to his office.

"Wouldn't have thought that the case, honestly. You two look nothing alike, but I'd be a fool not to notice how much she adores you, and how you're always hovering over her." He offered her a smile as he shut the door. The office was a comfortable size, much larger than the one from the orphanage. Joel moved behind his desk and sat down, his hand outstretched and motioning Amber to sit down across from him. She slowly moved toward the open seat, taking in the details of the room. There wasn't much in there; the large window behind the desk was the most alluring part. The wallpaper was old and faded, the floor was an oddly textured carpet, there was a single large bookshelf on the adjacent wall, and a large black object filled the rest of the excess space.

Joel searched his desk, eventually pulling out a moderate sized tube of gel similar to the one Amber had seen in their first aid kit. He squeezed a bit onto his fingers and gently rubbed the cool substance over the large area of scraped skin on her left cheek. It didn't take long for him to address the minor cuts and raw skin on her arms and elbows.

"If I may inquire, how did you come about these injuries?" he asked, as he spread a small amount over her right thumb.

"I…uh…a cop pushed me out of his sky-car. It's not that bad, I just didn't land right." Amber said, flustered at knowing she was too reckless earlier and that she knew better than to be caught.

"This looks like more than just one fall, my dear." The elderly man noted, offering the rest of the tube to the girl. "You can do your knees and legs… I'm sure you've got cuts or scrapes there too."

Amber took the tube and nervously applied the gel to her right knee, which had taken a beating from a flight of old concrete steps. "I might have gotten caught a few times." She said, lowering her head, her cheeks flushing with shame. _I'm no good to Mel if I'm hurt all the time. She'd be worried… and she would hold this over my head forever, of course._

"So, when did she go missing?" Joel asked softly, his eyes broadcasting his sympathy for Amber. She turned her head away and focused on the large black object instead. _I don't want his pity or his sympathy. I messed up. She's gone and I'm not there to help her._

"This morning before dawn. She normally sleeps in, but she wasn't there when I woke up. I searched the neighbourhood and downtown… I haven't seen her anywhere. She could be lost out there and I…I can't do anything." Amber's voice was low, each word hollower than the last.

"Perhaps that's a lesson to learn, child." He said. Amber's gaze spun toward him in confusion. "Is there a chance she left on her own, that she felt she had somewhere to be, something to do? You can't always be attached at the hip, lass. She'll do her own thing sometimes."

Amber shook her head. "I'm her big sister. If she's in danger…"

"Do you trust her?" he interrupted, easing one of his hands over Amber's. She looked down and realized she'd been gripping the desk in front of her tightly, and released.

"Of course I trust her! It's everyone else that I have a hard time trusting." She muttered in frustration_. I try, Mel. I really, really try, but it's hard when so many people look at us like we're dirt, calling us street rats..._

"She's a smart kid. Resourceful. I'm sure she's out there, doing fine, and she probably knows you're worried sick about her. I don't think she takes that lightly, from what I know of her. It's fine to be worried, lass. It is…but don't take that worry out on yourself. Don't go getting yourself bruised and battered because you think you've failed her. You haven't. Just trust her, that she'll be fine." Amber let his words sink in as she just sat there. _How can I really say I trust her if I can't let her just…be? She spends most afternoons and mornings away from me anyway, so it's not THAT big of a change…can't she have one day to herself and just enjoy the solitude like I did before? I just…I worry so much and…that's fine. It makes sense that she left on her own…she's probably fine. Joel's right, I shouldn't beat myself up over something I have no say in._

She nodded and rose, offering a small smile in thanks to the wise librarian in front of her. He stood and slowly moved over to the black object, again sitting down on a small bench. "Now, you go home and get some rest. Your wounds will heal quickly, but I'd rather you not run into any more trouble this evening. Stay safe, lass."

Amber slowly made her way out of the room, stopping for a moment upon hearing magnificent noises from behind her, but she decided her questions about that could wait. She had a lot of thinking to do.

* * *

Amber exited out onto the city's bustling street; the sights and sounds were merely noise to the girl as she ventured her way home quickly. A sense of guilt had formed within her, but for new reasons; she had been selfish and overbearing. Worst of all, she had lacked proper trust, and whether her sister was aware of that, she felt Melody deserved an apology. Her feet found their way to their regular meeting place, but instead of Melody, a taller dark-haired woman sat on the bench. Amber nearly ignored it, she knew that bench wasn't solely reserved by herself and Melody, but as she passed by, she caught a glimpse of the woman's face.

_Her._

The woman from the diner sat in the redhead's usual place, and patted the spot beside her, beckoning Amber to sit. She reluctantly followed the gesture, lowering herself onto the bench and resting against its armrest.

"Viola, if you've forgotten." She said, offering her hand out. When it was clear Amber wasn't about to reciprocate, she brought her hand back and sighed. "You two girls really should be more careful during your treks downtown. It's like you actually enjoy all the attention from the authorities and…worse." The woman said, sarcastically.

Amber rubbed a hand over some of her scraped skin, noticing it had nearly healed. "I've only ever been caught today, really. Besides, I didn't get too roughed up, it's nothing."

"Yes, yes, but that nothing is costing me a fortune. You two ARE aware that when I said the Reds wouldn't bother you anymore, that you were generally safe to keep a low profile. Instead, you're blowing through downtown practically telling the police that you want to be caught and impounded. That…that would not be beneficial for either of us, Amber." The woman said, her voice expressing her weariness of the day's events. Viola recounted all the forgeries she had to commission to keep the girl from entering the police's records in any form. _It would be unwise of me to allow mention of the girls to reach more inquiring channels. I do have an illusion to upkeep, afterall, _the woman thought, _Last thing I need is for word to get out to the Alliance that the girls aren't at their precious academy. The both of them have been too much trouble today._

Amber repressed her urges to ask if she'd seen her sister, feeling it would probably only worsen the situation and further betray Melody's trust_. I won't do that. Especially not with this woman._

"Are you just going to complain to me? Because I'll leave. I thought you wanted to talk about something more serious." The brunette said sardonically. The woman merely glanced at her omni-tool.

"I merely wanted to find out how you two are doing. Oh, are you aware that there's a current notice displayed in a fair number of retail stores, detailing a young female thief? Certainly, not all are aware there's anything amiss, but you can be certain that most will follow suit, if only to appease the paying customers. Perhaps you should be looking for a new source of income?" Amber glared at the woman, understanding that she was trapped to a degree. _I don't think I've been too sloppy…not sloppy enough to have a notice in place…I wouldn't put it past her to set me up._

"I'm not going to your school, or whatever. I don't care how much you try and force me, I'm not going. I'm fine the way I am." Amber retorted, her hands clenching.

"I wouldn't dream of forcing you into the training program. Certainly, it must be your decision, and I will respect your wishes. However, I do not see much future for the two of you as is. You have been stealing much more than you're spending, so perhaps you have some sort of goal. I will politely remind you that you were a subject in our study, so we will make certain to keep tabs on you. However, that need not be a bad thing…I can help you achieve your goals."

"I don't want your help. I made that clear." Amber noted, frustrated at Viola's attempts to play nice.

"You don't even need to tell me what you want to do with the money. I just don't want you two starving or wounded." Viola said softly. "You may not believe me, but I do not want harm to come to you. I was incredibly upset when I learned the Reds had demolished the orphanage. Those deaths still weigh heavy on my heart, I know it is my mistake to own, my burden. I fear I have lost your trust due to that. Even if that is not the case, I do not mind you wanting whatever future you have envisioned, that is not something I will obstruct. I only showed myself today to present you an offer…" Viola paused, waiting for a reaction from Amber, but the girl simply continued glaring at her. "I have some new projects, and correspondence over messaging or vidmail is too insecure. The jobs would be intermittent, but would pay well, and you would only need to carry a datapad or so from one area in town to another. There are no hostile relationships to worry about, and you would be not be harassed whenever you found yourself downtown on one of these jobs. It is merely an offer. The pay would be approximately one hundred dollars, at minimum. I would likely have a few each month. Whatever you're saving up for would sooner become a reality. You are free to decline, however."

Amber considered the woman's offer_. It could have us at a colony, with some savings, by Christmas. Maybe. That's…a lot of money. Like, sometimes a week's worth of extra money. And if it's safe…and they won't stop us from leaving…not that I trust them or anything, but if I have a notice out on me, what choice do I have? Hrm…_

"Make it a hundred and twenty dollars minimum and we have a deal." Amber stated bluntly. "If not, I'm sure we can keep up doing what we're doing. You know, with no harm coming to us and all."

Viola suppressed a smile, nodding. "Very well, young one. When we have a job for you, an agent of mine will leave directions for you to pick up the items, and where to deliver them to. It will be simple and swift." The woman stood from the bench and tapped away at her omni-tool. "I will see you again. Until then, be safe."

Amber watched Viola walk casually down the path, her bodyguards slowly converging on her position as they headed to a nearby sky-car. She glanced back down at the recently vacated bench seat and noticed she'd left a tube of paste. _Well, this day just keeps getting crazier. I really should be going, though. Hopefully Mel gets home soon, it's getting late._

* * *

The room was dark when she returned. The sheets were still partially balled up and tossed to the side from the morning, and in the dim evening light, it was as if she were experiencing it all again. Her home usually felt safe, but she couldn't help but feel a little trepidation upon entering; her emotions from the morning seemed on her mind's periphery, waiting to be called upon. Those emotions dissipated upon noticing a tired looking redhead off in the far corner, writing on a datapad. _Thank god_. Amber noticed her sister's exhaustion as she crossed the room warily, unsure what to even say, or do.

Melody rubbed at her bloodshot eyes and lazily lifted her gaze from the datapad, noticing Amber's approach. Her green emeralds scanned over her big sister's body, often momentarily stopping and squinting at certain parts, before returning them to meet Amber's hazel orbs.

"You're hurt." There was no surprise in her voice, no immediacy; just weariness and resigned concern. "It…must have been pretty serious if you went and bought some medi-gel." Melody slumped forward slightly, before bringing herself slowly to her feet and closing the distance to examine the healing wounds.

Amber stood still and watched her sister slowly fuss over her cuts. _She looks drained…whatever she did, it must not have gone well._

"Joel actually gave it to me, so I didn't pay for it. I'm fine though. Just some cuts and scrapes, no big deal, Mel…" Amber gently caught Melody's hand as it was reaching to touch the gash on her elbow. She looked imploringly at the redhead, noticing her puffy, bloodshot eyes, her slightly flushed face; Amber had seen that face before on a number of occasions. _Oh Mel, what happened?_ Her little sister noticed Amber's concern and gave a pained smile.

"That's good. I…I'm glad he helped you. You were probably really worried." She said, holding Amber's gaze. The brunette carefully let go of her sister's hand and lowered her head.

"Yeah. I kind of scoured downtown for you. Got…noticed along the way a few times." She said with a slight grin, pointing to some cuts. _I'll never live this down, ever, knowing her_. "Mel, I'm sorry. I overreacted today and I forgot all about what trusting you really means. You deserve better than me thinking you're in some kind of danger when you're not around me. I'll be better."

Melody let out a small sigh and covered her face partially with her hand. "I probably should have left you a note, so you wouldn't worry so much. Don't worry about it, I know you're trying, and that's what's important to me. I'm just…I'm just glad you aren't mad at me."

"I really don't think that's possible, Mel." Amber quickly noted, "You're the one who gets to decide where you go and what you do, not me. You don't need to apologize to me…I know whatever you did today was important to you and…if it's important to you, it's important to me."

Melody stood there in front of Amber and sluggishly rubbed her eyes, her fiery waves obscuring much of her face. She moved a few steps away and pulled four credit chits from a small bag and handed them to Amber. The brunette looked them over and checked their balances, nearly stumbling over at the total.

"How…whoa. How did you get your hands on this kind of money?" she asked, absolutely shocked that her sister had brought in over two hundred dollars. _Wait…this doesn't make any sense…she should be thrilled, or at least pleased… _Amber's brow furrowed as her mind raced to consider how she could have come across that amount.

"Just the usual ways. Got lucky, I guess." She replied, with a shrug. "Took up your offer of getting some rest. Left early in the morning, got the money, and spent part of the afternoon in a really nice park."

Amber stood, dumbfounded. _What's she not telling me? She has to know I'd help her with anything, I would never get mad at her._ "I…believe you, but…shouldn't that make you happy? I mean, I'm sorry, Mel, but you look exhausted and like you've been having a really bad day. You know you can tell me anything, right? We're sisters."

Melody flinched slightly at her sister's words and moved to the bed, gently guiding herself onto it and spreading the sheets over her body. Amber cautiously followed suit, occasionally casting worried glances as they lay there in bed beside each other.

"Mel…"Amber started, after an excruciating period of silence. "Mel, did I do something wrong?"

The girl beside her shifted slightly before rotating herself to face Amber. "No. But…I think, if you need to get used to me doing my own thing…that we should meet up here every evening instead of by the river."

Amber paled at the thought of not having that walk home together. It had been her favourite part of the day since they had found their routine. "I…alright. Can we still meet up sometimes during the day? At the library, or the park?"

"Sure. Actually, can we spend tomorrow at the park? I think we both earned a little rest." Melody yawned and snuggled up to Amber.

"The park you went to today?" Amber asked, curious about the location. The two of them had been to nearly every park near or in the downtown core, and the thought of a new one intrigued her.

Melody shook her head slightly and buried it against her sister's shoulder, the brunette's curls providing a soft shelter for her head. "No. I'll bring you there on my birthday." Amber cocked an eyebrow, confused. _But she doesn't know her birthday…_

"That anytime soon?" Amber whispered, leaning her head to rest against her sister's. A soft snore answered her a few moments later. "You know, one day, I'm gonna shake you awake. I swear, you need to teach me to sleep on a dime like that."

She carefully slipped her arms around Melody and held her close, a seed of worry planted in her gut. _Well, if I can't make her comfortable enough to tell me about what's going on, I can at least make her comfortable while she dreams. Maybe that's enough._

Sleep soon overtook Amber, her mind replaying that warm November afternoon in the orphanage's yard; the leaves dancing in the sky and Melody's laughter sweetly lingering in the air.

* * *

**A/N: Hey all! Sorry if some of the writing here seems a bit stiff. Been fighting my way through a writer's block of sorts. That, and keeping all the plot threads visible and written down in case I forget. I'm still kind of paranoid that I messed up a detail or two.**

**Next chapter will be up...I don't exactly know when. I don't have the busiest week ahead, but I'm unsure about the content I'm putting into the next two chapters...wondering if I should keep them split, or merge them together. So it could be a fair wait. I'll try to make it as soon as I can, though, I promise :D**

**Anywho, despite some issues IRL, I've been feeling pretty good considering the amount of traffic on my fic. So thanks again to all you readers who are giving my story the time of day! Thanks to the usual suspects who provideth me with wonderful, cherished feedback, and those who favourite/alert my story :) To thee, I bestow upon you many thanks.**

**Hope your July has been well, and I hope your weekends are enjoyable!**


	11. Chapter 11

_October 21__st__ 2168  
_

* * *

"Please, stay with me."

Those four words echoed relentlessly through Amber's head as she sprinted up a flight of stairs on the city's upper level. Melody's offer had been persistent in the past weeks; sometimes she felt a short reprieve from their daily stress would be nice, but it was too short-sighted, however alluring it may be. _We need out of this life, out of this god-forsaken city. A shuttle off this dying rock is what we both need, and I can't lose focus..._ Amber thought as she burst into a shopping center, hoping to lose her tail in the crowd. _Maybe I should have taken Mel's offer today though. 'No hostiles' she said. 'Just a messenger job' she said. Screw Viola, I'm going to show her what it's like to be in someone else's sights one day..._

She scrambled down a hall, weaving between shoppers and passers-by, making a beeline for another exit on that floor, a hundred or so metres away and closing. As she pushed through the doors, she noticed one of the women chasing her out of the corner of her eye. It wasn't difficult to notice; they wore a bright white, orange and black ensemble. Amber somersaulted to avoid the taller woman's reach, pushing off from a nearby barrier to spring herself forward back onto her feet and away from her pursuers. Her jaunts downtown and previous jobs had helped her conditioning, but she'd begun to tire; her target drop-off had been close for nearly a half an hour, but she hadn't a clue how to lose her tail without putting herself in a dangerous position. _They have guns...if I go somewhere that's absolutely empty, they'll have all the time in the world to shoot me. What the hell should I do? Do I take that risk? Do I risk giving away the drop off?_

Amber's decision was quickly made for her as a group of adults similar to her pursuers came running around the corner in front of her, forcing her into the building the drop was to be made in. _Coincidence that they just happen to show up there? Hrm..._ , she thought as she sprinted exhaustedly up the stairwell. _No time to wait for elevators_. She could hear them fast behind her, barrelling up the stairs after her. _At least four chasing me up here in this stairwell. I need to get to the eighth floor_. Level by level, her pursuers began to lag after her. She could hear their tromping feet fall further behind as she blew through the eighth floor entrance. The apartment complex was fairly high end; she noticed paintings hung along the hall as she passed them. _It's absolutely dead in here. What's going on?_ As she rounded the corner, she caught the drop-off location; Room 817's door was slightly ajar, allowing her to easily slip the datapad through the narrow slit. As soon as she slid it through, the door closed silently, leaving Amber unprotected in the hallway as the sounds of footsteps came closer. Amber reached into her pocket and grabbed her backup datapad as she ran quickly down the hall, continuing to the opposite stairwell.

Two bodies entering from the stairwell interrupted Amber's thoughts, and she slowed to a stop, watching as they cautiously walked forward. Behind her, she could hear a few sets of footsteps slowly approaching as well. She looked over her shoulder briefly. _Three...so five in total. Well, shit_. Amber held up the datapad. She'd decided if anything went awry, it would be best to have a form of seemingly legitimate information to barter her way out of trouble. Using some old communication data from the first mission, and editing some of the content, it was a legitimate looking piece of equipment aside from not being encrypted. _Hope this decoy works...I didn't exactly plan to be chased by a bunch of adults or anything, so it'll have to do for now._

"I take it you're looking for this?" she asked, steadying her voice as much as she could. "You can have it. Not worth all this hassle."

A woman in front of her took a step forward, aiming a sort of gun at her. "I'm afraid it won't go over that easy." Amber kept herself from cringing. _No harm will come to me, eh Viola? You're doing an awesome job of that._

"Oh come on, guys. I gave you a little morning exercise! Just helping you out so you stay in shape, and can catch your own kids when they're playing, or whatever you people do when you're not threatening fourteen year old homeless girls. It's not like you can exactly kill me here." Amber said, noticing her pursuers had stopped moving entirely and were aiming weapons at her. "Too messy, you don't look like the Reds, so I'm pretty sure you're not idiots. Why don't you just take..."

A bolt of electricity coursing through her body halted her attempt to talk her pursuers down, the pain from the taser forcing Amber to her knees. She knelt still for a moment as the feeling subsided, and tried standing, only to be met with another shock; this one slightly more powerful, locking up her body and forcing a pained grunt from her as she collapsed to the ground. _Okay, no getting up...fuck that hurts_.

Amber took a few deep breaths as she lay on the ground, trying to regain composure. She slid the datapad to the woman who had stepped forward initially. "There, you have the info." She coughed out. "At least I'll know now that if you hurt me again, you're just sick fucks." The woman slowly picked up the datapad and casually shot Amber with another bolt of electricity.

_Ow! Just my luck..._ she thought, as the convulsions stopped. _What the hell are they doing? They have the info, and if they know it's fake, they should just kill me or something_. Amber looked up at the two individuals in front of her; her vision was blurred slightly, but she noticed a distinct shaking of the head before the larger male of the two approached her. _Maybe they've decided enough is..._

She felt the air burst out of her as a boot crashed against her chest, sending her rolling a foot or two down the hall. Her skin tingled as she gripped the floor for stability; her choking and coughing was keeping her off-balance, and she knew these people weren't likely to leave her alone. _Best go out swinging. I'm sorry, Mel._ As she started to rise, a hand clutched her by the neck and hurled her into a nearby wall, plaster breaking all around her as she dropped to the ground. The pain throbbed through her entire frame, but the pins and needles feeling allowed her to ignore it for the most part. She rose quickly this time and threw out a punch that landed against the man's torso, seemingly ineffective. Amber dodged a right hook aimed at her head but took a knee to the midsection for her efforts, sending her crumpling to the ground yet again.

_Fuck this déjà vu crap_. She thought, coughing out blood onto the hardwood floor_. I'm going home early, I'm getting that money, and I'm going to see Mel. I feel like I'm on fire, but I'm not sure if the pain's from that or the fact that I've had the crap beaten out of me_. She saw a boot swinging toward her body and rolled to the side, sending out a punch, but with it came a ripple of blue that violently threw the man back against the woman who she'd given the datapad to. Turning her head, she noticed the three others behind her had gone or left. _Maybe they weren't all sick fucks_.

Amber rose slowly, pain becoming more prominent as the tingling sensation faded. She limped her way over to the two fallen adults. The man lay unconscious on top of the woman, who was squirming underneath him, trying to get free. Amber raided his body, pulling out a credit chit, an omni-tool, and a large pistol. She stared at the handgun, feeling the weight of it. _Well...I probably shouldn't let them chase me. I'm sure he'll be awake soon_. Unlatching the safety, she carefully aimed and shot the man in the kneecap; both waking him up and sending him rolling off of the woman, howling in pain. Amber quickly shifted her aim to the woman sprawled out on the floor.

"I'm going to leave now. If you get up I'm going to shoot you. If you chase me I'm going to shoot you, probably. I'd just stay there for a bit. You got what you came for, just let it go." Amber said, as she backed up toward the exit into the stairwell. "And if I see any of you people around...well, you'd be better off staying away from me. Just a gut feeling, you know?" She reached behind her for the handle and pushed herself into the stairwell and stumbled down the stairs away from the scene. For a few moments, she feared the woman would chase after her, but there were no footsteps above her or beneath her.

When she reached the lobby, it had the odd normal person walking around or waiting for the elevator, but none in that specific get-up. Limping out to the skycar terminal, she received a few strange looks from passersby as she waited for her arranged ride, but she ignored them. She knew how bad she looked, and was too sore and hungry to care.

_I just want to go home. I just want this to stop._

* * *

Melody stood on a crate, head arched up toward the open entrance, hungrily sucking in the chilly autumn breeze. It had been an uncharacteristically cold autumn, temperatures often dropping beneath the freezing mark at night. Melody generally enjoyed the warmer temperatures of summer and spring, but considered herself fortunate for the cooler weather. The air felt fresh in her lungs, clearing out the taste of her body's digestive fluids and her last attempted meal. She looked down at the floor to where the mess laid; normally she'd been good enough to at least get a bin, or even get outside, but today was a particularly bad one. _I'm going to have to clean that up before Amber gets home...I hope she won't be able to smell it. How the heck..._

Her focus was broken as her breathing seized, sending her into a coughing fit. She quickly reached up and gripped the sill of the window for balance as she choked and hacked violently, tiny droplets of blood spattering out onto the cement wall. Feeling the bile in her throat rise, she staggered off the crate and clumsily made her way to a nearby bucket, heaving out the rest of her food and drink; each pained cough expelling more of her attempt to stay nourished. _Fudge..._ she thought, as her body slowly stopped struggling, as her wheezing calmed into the slightly laboured breathing that had become normal for her in recent days.

Melody slowly limped her way across the room to her hidden nook and retrieved the bag Viola had given her that night in the diner. _There's not much left_. She'd kept it secret, as bonus savings in case they fell on some bad luck. The initial credit chit the woman had gifted them was not a small deposit, but it wasn't long before she realized she'd need it to help pad her daily hauls. Melody had broken it down into a number of smaller ones weeks back, but only a few chits remained. She took two smaller ones, shoving them into her pocket, and hid the bag away_. I'm gonna have to tell her soon, but...jeez, I don't know how. _She made her way back toward the crate, wanting a place to rest her aching feet and to breathe fresh air again._ I just really wanted a day in the park with her, but ..._

Melody immediately became aware of the body descending onto the crate, and then onto the floor in front of her. The brunette wiped sweaty curls out of her eyes and looked Melody over, her eyes glimmering slightly in concern.

"Mel?"

* * *

"Are you alright?" The words found their way out of Amber's mouth, even though she knew the answer. She scanned the room and quickly saw evidence to confirm that whatever Melody was dealing with had escalated. _Does she have the flu? I had it once...vomited a few times, felt awful and tired..._

"It...I'm fine." Melody said, though her appearance told a different story. Small remains of vomit had found their way onto her sweater, she looked paler than usual, and sweat was forming around her hairline. _Not to mention she's been losing weight lately. How much, I can't really tell...damn sweater._ "The...paste was , uh, disgusting. A new flavour."

Amber knew it was a bit more than that, but decided to go along with it. _She probably just doesn't want to burden me. _"Yeah, can't blame your body for having good taste, I guess." She took a step forward and Melody's eyes darted away. "So, uh, you home early?"

"Yeah. I...took a day off." The nervous tension in the air was palpable; the redhead's body language only made it visible. They remained silent for a few moments, both not feeling too comfortable with where they knew the conversation would go.

"That's good. You...you looked like you needed it." Amber mumbled, scratching the back of her head. "I wish I could have been here." She'd been trying to get her sister to take a day off for weeks, hoping her sister could rest up and kick whatever bug she had. The only response she'd get were those four words that had been haunting her. _'Please, Stay with me'...Jeez, Mel, I really should have, today. I've never seen you like this._

Melody shot a dejected look at Amber and sighed. "You could have. I wanted to see the parks with you now that the leaves have changed colour." Amber recalled that evening from last autumn again. Her mind would often drift back to that day, yearning for that feeling of blind hope again_. I want that again. But I haven't been able to give us a day like that. _She felt a twinge of guilt as she thought about the sacrifices they had made and hardships they'd been through the past year. That guilt had words spilling out of her mouth before she could react.

"If you wanted to spend more time together, you wouldn't have taken away our time downtown." She felt the guilt build inside her as she finished the last syllable. _She looks like hell, she doesn't deserve to be talked to like this. Especially not from me...I'm a pathetic big sister sometimes_. Turning her gaze away from Melody's stunned face, she responded quickly, hoping to soothe her sister. "I'm sorry Mel. God, I'm sorry, I didn't like doing that, but I've been holding it against you for stupid reasons for too long. I...I just really missed our time together. I miss you."

"I'm sorry too. I've been bugging you a lot and I know you're the most stubborn bird in the world...I knew that asking you to take a day off would probably just egg you on, but I...I was desperate." Melody confessed, rubbing her left eye gently. "I'm your little sister, I've always been clingy. I just...I needed you to have some space sometimes...but I still needed you. I know it's my fault too though." Melody's voice was shaking, her eyes uncertain as tears trickled down her pallid cheeks.

Amber started toward her sister, wincing from the pain in her midsection. One of Viola's men had taken a look at her on the drive back and tested her for any breaks, fractures or sprains; her bill of health had been limited to bruising, but it didn't keep her body from feeling like it had been hit by a skycar. Melody noticed her sister's pain and curiously stepped back toward the wall.

"You're hurt?" she asked, her green eyes glimmering with anger and regret. "That lady...we shouldn't have...we shouldn't have taken her help! I..." Melody's anger was interrupted by a violent bout of coughs, sending her reeling against the wall, leaning onto another crate for balance.

Amber took a step forward, reaching out. "Mel...if you're sick..." Her sister animatedly waved her off, stopping her in her tracks. They both waited for the coughing fit to subside. Melody looked back to Amber, and the brunette stifled a gasp. It was clear her sister was exhausted, sweat dripping down her forehead, and a grimace of pain etched across her face. _Oh Mel..._

"It's... contagious. What I have. Don't come any closer." Her sentences were short, the words forming only after great effort. Amber took another step forward.

"I don't care, Mel." She said, trying to sound playful. "We can share the misery, at least we can spend time together, and..." Amber stopped talking, noticing her sister shambling towards her. Expecting a hug, she found herself knocked slightly off-balance by the open-handed slap across her face. _What the shit?_ Amber stood shocked and stared confusedly at her sister. _She's never actually hit me before. Not like this._

"You NEED to care, Amber! You need to, but you always do these things that put yourself in danger, like you're supposed to, like you think I need you to. I don't! I need you to stay away from doing things that might get you killed!" Melody's voice was hoarse from coughing, but she showed no signs of stopping. "I love you Amber, I love you, but sometimes you do things that make me feel like...like you don't care. You need to care about yourself! I can't be the only one!"

Amber rubbed her cheek and shook her head slightly, unsure what to say. "Mel, I care for you. I love you so, so much. I just...I care for you, you care for me...can't it be that simple? Isn't that enough?"

"No! I know how you are, Amber. You're always trying to prove you deserve what you have, that you're worthy of it, and you are...you are, and until you actually take a moment to care about yourself, actually care about yourself...you won't ever think you can do better." Melody's words were raw across Amber's ears. She knew her sister had a point. _Still, for years I only cared about myself, right?_

"Mel, I lived alone before I knew you. I'm pretty sure I cared about myself back then and I was kind of miserable." Melody shook her head vigorously and moved backward, her hand finding and gripping the wall.

"No, you just wanted to survive long enough to find someone to save. You don't need to save me, though. I'm not helpless. I don't want you killing yourself to give me some future that might not happen." Melody held up a hand, stalling Amber's response. "I don't want that if you're not there. You need to be there, Amber. And you'll need to be okay with having your own dreams and goals, and I'll need you to love yourself. If there's anything I want from you, it's that."

"I'll try, Mel. I promise. I just...I want you to see space and the colonies, and...I want to be there too, don't get me wrong, but I'm pretty simple. I can live on paste, I can sleep forever here. I just want you to be happy." Amber took a small step forward, hoping Melody wouldn't oppose it.

"I am happy! I'm happiest when we're together, and I don't need a colony to have that. The colonies can wait. Just...I want us both to be happy while we can! I know that's not possible with the whole colony thing floating around in your bird-brained head, but..."

Amber decided to interject, trying to get her perspective across. "Mel, the colonies were your idea at first, but I really want that too, and I'm happy when I think of the progress we're making. It's just that we'll have all the time in the world to do other stuff once we leave this place, and..."

"I'm not always going to be here!" The words were pained and desperate, stopping Amber's explanation in its tracks, her heart skipping a beat at the implication of the sentence. _What? I...what?_

Melody quickly covered her mouth with both hands and turned away from her sister, moving toward the other side of the room. Amber watched on, stunned as Melody's knees buckled after a few steps. _Mel!_ The redhead's legs failed beneath her, her gaunt frame crashing hard against the floor.

"Mel!" Amber cried out, rushing over to her fallen sister. She gently rolled Melody over onto her back and checked her pulse to make sure she was still alive; the girl's breathing was still steady, if laboured. Amber slowly lifted her from the ground over to their bed, resting her down among the blankets and pillows. _It's been a while since I've seen you this close up during the day, Mel,_ she thought to herself as she checked her sister for injuries. She cautiously began removing the redhead's sweater but reflexively dropped it as it rose just above the navel. _Christ! What the fuck...oh my god oh my god._ She took a moment to steel herself and gingerly began removing the sweater; it was a loose, bulky garment that had kept her sister warm, but it had also masked her form from the brunette.

Melody's body was pallid, thin and sickly, her ribs poking hard against her skin. What concerned Amber most were the small lumps were scattered all over her torso, and the slightly larger ones populating her arms. _This isn't the flu..._ she thought, tears spilling freely from her eyes. _Oh god Melody, what's happening? I..._ Amber hesitantly reached over and gently removed a single shoe, revealing even more of the painful looking lumps. _Oh Christ, this is bad..._

Amber heard the sheets shift slightly and soon felt a hand lightly grip her forearm. Melody offered Amber a warm, knowing smile, which helped soothe some of her anxiety.

"Can I have my sweater back? I'm cold." Melody asked, her voice a whisper. "Don't worry about the shoe. I...It doesn't make a difference." Amber quickly nodded and guided the sweater back over her sister.

"Mel..." Amber started, just finishing fitting Melody's left arm into its sleeve. "This is...you need to go to a hospital. You need a doctor." She tried to keep herself from sounding anxious, worried, or afraid, but she knew it was written all over her face.

"I did. I went there, and they...well, they told me what I had. I ran away as soon as I could and came back." Melody's voice was soft as she slowly sat up in bed and rested against her sister's shoulder.

Amber thought back to the past week. _When did she got to the hospital? I didn't..._Amber wondered for a moment before the answer became painfully clear. _Oh..._

"That day that you were gone..." Amber's voice trailed, thinking about how much she'd worried. Melody simply nodded as Amber combed a hand through her wavy red locks. "Why did you leave? They...what do you have? What can I do?"

"There was no point staying. What I have...it's bad. Not contagious though, I don't know why I said that, I... I just need you to stay with me." Melody clasped her hands over Amber's right. "I know you're upset, but please."

Amber felt a surge of guilt overwhelm her._ That...this is why she wanted...I ...oh no. I screwed up so bad, I'm so fucking stupid!_ Amber glanced down at Melody's exposed foot and sobbed out a sigh. _No way I get her to her favourite park like this...and...and..._

"How long?" Amber's words were barely more audible than her breaths. Melody kept her gaze locked with her sister's.

"Not long. Days. Long enough to spend time together." She squeezed Amber's hand and nuzzled gently against her, but felt her older sister's body moving away.

"There has to be something I can do. Are you hungry? No...no...you just vomited a little while ago...water! You have to be thirsty, can I get you some? I think I have a flask in one of my bags..." Amber anxiously searched Melody's face for approval, for a sign that she could help her sister in some other way. Melody gave a pained smile and shook her head. _Not even water?_

"A pillow to prop me up would be nice, but really, I'm just tired. I know it's early, but...can you lay here until I fall asleep?" Amber paused for a moment before offering both pillows to Melody so she could breathe a little easier while resting. Her mind raced with all the questions she wanted to ask, all the worries she wanted to vent, but she knew there would be a time for that sooner rather than later. She helped get Melody into position and nestled up against her. This...she's all I have in the world. She mused to herself, her brain struggling to comprehend what was happening. _I want more time..._

Amber wrapped her arms around Melody, feeling as if the redhead was going to disappear if she closed her eyes.

Time was passing, and so was she.

* * *

Hours and days lost their meaning as Amber took care of Melody; the redhead spent less and less time awake as time passed, each bout of consciousness mutely celebrated even as they became less active. She didn't mind helping her sister with anything; she'd paid attention to what the nurse did when her torso was on lock-down at the hospital, and just did her best to copy what care was necessary. Being able to sleep so often also helped rest her body from the damage it had taken during the last job from Viola. In a way, it was depressing; Amber knew she was healing, and knew Melody was deteriorating. Despite feeling better physically, every moment was mentally and emotionally draining.

Amber had woken in what seemed like the early afternoon, but she wasn't sure; she hadn't left their home outside of one time to stockpile supplies. _Not that I needed them, though._ Amber looked away from the window above her and back to her sleeping sister. _I've been watching her starve for days now. All she does is vomit everything back up. Even the water too, but I think her body absorbs some of it. I don't think she'd still be alive if she didn't._ _Maybe...maybe that would be easier on her._ She looked down at the tube in her hand, feeling guilty as her stomach rumbled with hunger. _Damnit...I want this to just be a bad dream...I want to wake up..._

The brunette moved across the room and sat on one of the crates, quickly slurping away at the paste. _I just don't get it...how could something like this happen? Why Melody? Why not me? I don't...I don't want to be alone again. I can't pretend I'd be happy like that, like I was before. And..._ Amber's thoughts ran wild in her as she stared at the half-empty tube of paste in her hand. She angrily chucked it aside and dropped her face to her hands. _...And she doesn't even seem all that upset about it. She's still smiling, and trying to cheer me up, and...I mean,...GOD, she's DYING!_

Hot tears streamed past her palms as her emotions raged, a maelstrom of remorse, grief, anger and fear overwhelmed her as her body was racked in sobs. _It's just not fair! I...God, if you exist at all...can you please hurry and find Melody? Can you help her...some way, any way, I can't... I can't... _

"Someone..." The whispered words broke Amber clear out of her mindset, pulling her focus to the newly awake redhead across the room. She scrambled off the crate to her sister's side and took her hand, worry reflected across her face.

"...someone told me once, 'if you need to let it all out, then I'll be here'." The withered looking girl spoke softly, her eyes only half open. "Can you believe it's only been a year since? Only a year and a half since we met?"

Amber tearfully shook her head, smiling at the memory. "It feels like a lifetime ago." She said, wiping her nose, sniffling. "I'm sorry for being so emotional, I...I just want you to be with me."

Melody opened her eyes fully, her viridian globes glistening with such joy that Amber's heart ached. "I AM with you. I'll always be with you, I promise." The words came quietly from the resting girl, her voice straining with each syllable. Her big sister took her pale, thin hand to her lips and held it there for a moment.

"Please, Mel...you know you can't promise that..." Amber whispered through her sister's hand and kissed it, cherishing the lingering warmth of her sister's life. "Just like I won't be able to keep mine...I didn't protect you, and I'm so sorry. I'm not gonna be able to get you out of here, Mel."

"Amber, trust me. I know it hurts, but trust me. You kept your promise. You couldn't have known about this, no one could have. You have nothing to be sorry for, Birdy. Just trust me. I promise to always be with you, like I promised that one day we'll get out to a colony and visit space." Melody squeezed Amber's hand lightly. Amber gave a restrained laugh and returned her sister's hand to the bedside. _How absurd is it that I feel I should believe her? Am I that desperate?_

"I'll hold you to that promise, Mel." Amber said, smiling nervously, trying to fill herself with the hope her sister seemed to be full of. _She's like that last breath of autumn before winter rolls in...God, it's going to be a long winter without her. Can I even stay here? I'd be a wreck...I'll be alone again, won't I?_ Amber shook her head slightly. "I don't know if I'll survive this winter, Mel. It's going to be long. I..."

"You do. You will." Melody spoke, her soft words emanating a warmth reminiscent of that fall afternoon a year ago. She gingerly placed her hand on Amber's knee, but remained silent.

Amber leaned down and peered into her sister's eyes. _They look just as alive as the first day I met her._ "Mel?"

"Tell me about that colony we're gonna live on...Drasta, I think. Tell me about space, what it's like." Her words were kind, but firm.

_She's serious?_ Amber thought, again, offering a nervous laugh. "Mel, you know I don't have an imagination." Her sister just nodded her head slowly and smiled up at her.

"That's why I'm asking, Amber." Melody radiated certainty, which unnerved and froze Amber. It took the curly haired brunette a few moments to realize the importance of the request, but also the purpose of it. _She's dying, and she wants me to tell her about the future I wanted for us. I don't know if I can..._

"Mel, please, don't..." she looked at her little sister, breathing slowly but erratically, gazing back at her with love. _I can't deny her anything...jeez..._ "Alright. Where do you want me to start?"

"The colony, please." Melody squeaked with as much excitement as she could muster. Amber smiled and shook her head.

"Hah, no, sorry. You need to get into space to get to Drasta, so I'm starting there." She said as playfully as she could, sticking out her tongue. "So we're on this amazing shuttle, huge windows...I've got a window seat because we rock-paper-scissors'ed for it, but you're leaning over me, looking out as we start to exit the Earth's atmosphere. We're blasting through clouds really fast and soon you can't even see Ottawa, just green and blue, and the sky around us. And then, even the sky disappears and it's like it's night-time, but it's so much better. You can see all the stars around us..." Amber was thinking the details up as fast as she could, trying to envision what it would be like.

"How bright are they? Can we see the big dipper?" her little sister asked, her eyes aglow with curiosity. Amber shook her head slightly.

"No, I can't, but you catch a glimpse of it. The stars are just so bright, and we can see them all, so much more than we can here. There are millions of them, and you want to visit them all, of course, but the shuttle finds its way into a small frigate. As we leave it and go into the big ship, Lieutenant Anderson is there to greet us and gives you a big hug. He brings us up to the cockpit and lets us watch as the ship starts to zoom through space, like...really quickly." Amber couldn't recall what kind of speed spaceships traveled at, and hoped she was doing a good job. Her sister noticed the uncertainty and squeezed her big sister's leg in support.

"And when it starts, space looks like an ocean, but made of stars. Waves of stars and planets fly by as we head to Drasta. All the people of the Alliance are happy and glad we're along for the ride, and they feed us a decent meal." She continued, taking some pleasure in knowing her sister was enjoying it.

"Like, corn on the cob and fish and ice cream?" Melody's words were a whisper, but the joy she emanated was invigorating.

"Of course, they only feed their people the best food." Amber said, grinning, allowing what she once hoped would be their future to pour out of her. "And we'd arrive on Drasta and meet our foster family. They'd be regular people and they're really nice. We still skip out on the farm-work a little to play around in the nearby stream or meadow, but they don't mind that much. And our neighbours are space elephants..."

"Elcor!" Melody exclaimed, wheezing slightly afterward from the effort.

"And they would be outraged and frustrated that I'd occasionally call them that, and you'd be fast friends with them and learn all about them. Heck, I'd even warm up to them, too. And there would be a hanar nearby that would help you with your writing, even though Joel would message us from time to time and give you help too, and you'd finish your first story. The first of many stories. I'd be so proud of you, Mel. And when we got to be eighteen, we'd get a place of our own and we'd have a place to call home. We'd...we'll be so happy." Amber wiped a stray tear from her cheek and smiled down at her sister.

"I am happy. I am home, with you." Melody said, offering the curly-haired brunette her trademark toothy smile; a rare sight recently that immediately burnt into Amber's memory. "But, what will you do when you grow up?"

"I...I'm not sure of that yet." Amber frowned, thinking hard about what she wanted from the future. _I guess I really haven't thought that much about it. Last time was at the hospital, and I still don't know what I want to do._

Melody reached into her pocket and took out a small acorn, offering it to her big sister. Amber cocked her head in confusion.

"I want to be there when you find out." The words came softly from her little sister, but she still remained confused as ever.

"I don't get it. What's that for?" she said, unsure what her sister was wanting from her.

"I told you a while ago that I kinda believe in reincarnation. A lot of people do, I think the frog-like people, the Salarians..." Amber anxiously interrupted her sister's seemingly out of the blue explanation.

"Mel, why are you telling me this?" Amber pleaded, closing her sister's hand around the acorn and holding it between hers.

"I've known about this for a while and...I read something a few weeks back by a poet Joel showed me. He wrote that 'The world was never made. It will change, but it will not fade. So let the wind rage, for even and morn ever will be, through eternity. Nothing was born, nothing will die, all things will change.' I..." Melody took a moment to collect herself, to find her words. "I know it won't be the same, but I promised to go with you. I'm keeping my promises."

Amber let go of Melody's hand and looked off to the side. "I don't get it." She said, shaking her head slightly as her eyes teared up.

"I want...I want you to plant this over me. It's a red oak acorn. Find a nice place, a park, and put this over me. I know it's hard, but...get that stupid woman to help you, or Anderson. I don't know. I just know that red oaks grow fast and that way, it'll probably have acorns of its own that you can take to Drasta relatively soon, and I read that it could grow there. I...I want to be around for a long time. I want to be somewhere you can visit me when you leave the nest. So you can fly back and see me when you want. I..." Melody's breaths were becoming ragged as she explained.

Amber knew her sister was completely exhausted. _This is the most she's talked in a long time, and I know she's tired and hurting. God, I just want more time. I want more time!_ Her vision was blurry as hot streams coursed over her cheeks, each droplet marking off their time left like a clock.

"Mel, please...stay with me. Just...stay." Amber dropped and laid herself beside Melody, stroking her sister's face. "Stay?"

Melody closed her eyes and gave a tired sigh, her tears streaking down her face, catching on her chin and nose. "I'm trying...I..."

Amber leaned forward and rested her forehead against Melody's, wiping her little sister's tears with her sleeve. "Please?" Amber couldn't will more than a single syllable out. She knew her sister was close.

"I love you."

_I love you too_, Amber desperately wanted to reply, but all she could manage were sobs as she held her sister. As her sister's breathing slowed, her body shook harder. As her sister's heartbeats became more spread out, she gripped her tighter.

When her sister was still, her emotions broke through her restraint. She wet her sister's neck with her tears, she filled their home with her screams, she filled the air with her anguish, and as hurt filled the emptiness that now resided in her, she knew she needed to hold onto it. She needed to find out who was responsible.

For now, though, she would mourn.

* * *

**A/N: Words cannot express how difficult it was to write this chapter. I will say I'm down a half box of Kleenex, if that counts for anything. I hope this chapter reads well. I know it's long, and that the gods of writing tend to prefer quicker death scenes, because drawn out anguish like this can lose its effect quickly, but this is how it's always been in my mind, and I honestly don't care too much about how it reads, outside of sentence structure and grammar, of course. I know it might be a bit cheesy, but I thought it fit Melody's character well. She sees the good in things, and tries to be as positive as possible. Her views on death reflect that with her belief in reincarnation. I took some influence from The Fountain, which actually came about subconsciously I guess, because it had been a while since I had seen the movie when I wrote the vague outline for all this, for Melody. Must have just struck a chord with how I envisioned Mel as a character. **

**Anywho, this chapter...it's something I've both been anticipating and dreading. I've wanted to get this over with for a month now, and I'm incredibly relieved that it won't be weighing me down anymore. It's sad, because I loved writing Melody. And it'll be strange not writing her in the following chapters, but I'll have to manage it. **

**So, uh, yeah! I hope you enjoyed the chapter, even if it was a real big downer. It hurt to write as much as it hurt to read, so I don't blame you if you chalk this up as disappointing or whatnot. Things will get better...eventually, I guess. **

**My eternal gratitude goes out to all the followers of my story and everyone who have left feedback :) You are all very helpful in both keeping me motivated and giving me insight as to what is/isn't working. And hopefully, you'll let me know what did/didn't work in this chapter. **

**Have a good weekend everyone! **


	12. Chapter 12

It took until the next morning for Amber to gather her resolve enough to leave her home. The first steps were slow and difficult, the pain in her chest resounding; yet, each step was easier as determination and anger fueled her to her downtown destination. Her mind was still a scattered mess of emotions and stray thoughts, but everything was slowly aligning. The extranet would have answers for what happened to her sister, and she would find them. She would know whose efforts destroyed her family.

The walk to the library was a swift one; her mind stuck in a haze as she recalled all that she knew of her sister's ailment, as she relived her last days with her. Wiping away her tears as she entered the building, Amber made a beeline for one of the terminals near the history wing; it would be quiet for a number of hours, and Joel wouldn't find her for a while. _It gives me some time to think about what to tell him. Hopefully I'll have found something by then._

She typed hastily at the terminal, scanning articles and info databases for whatever she could find regarding her sister's symptoms. It didn't take long to narrow it down to, at the very least, a form of cancer; further searches merely led her in a number of different directions that had frustrated her. She had only a few ideas of symptoms in her mind to work from, and so many forms of cancer shared a variety of them. Amber combed her fingers through her hair in exasperation over her troubles. _Why can't it just be easy and tell me? I need to find out and make a decision by the end of the day._ She'd gotten as much ice as she could get her hands on, and had done her best to cover her sister so that she wouldn't rot away as quickly, but she knew she was on borrowed time.

"Didn't expect to find you here all by your lonesome, child." Joel's voice rang out ahead of her; he was about twenty metres away, slowly strolling toward her. "Is your sister off ill? She was looking a bit under the weather last I saw her about a week and a half ago."

Amber kept her eyes glued to the screen, scanning the information that she'd just pulled up in hopes for some result. She felt the urge to bring her head up and tell him what happened, but she couldn't find the words in her mind to describe it._ It still barely seems real…and he was Mel's friend, so he should know but…God, what can I even say? I...would it even be right to tell him? To give him that burden, to let him hurt like I am?_ Her face stiffened as she placed all of her focus on the terminal in front of her, desperate to avoid the coming discussion. _Maybe he'll just go away?_

"Hah, don't mind an old man for prying, I know how it is when you're lost in something that interests you." Joel noted, casually stepping closer. His eyes glanced over some dusty hard-covers on a shelf nearby that appeared to have been placed back in the wrong order. "Just had some poets come to mind the other night and I felt your sister would enjoy some of their work."

The mere mention of her sister's writing brought her mind rushing back to the previous night's discussion, of words she'd wanted to tell her sister minutes and hours after she had passed. _Words she'll never hear…_

"Oh god, Mel." Her words were more breaths than anything, barely audible, but it caught the aging man's attention. He steadily made his way over to the tense-looking girl's side and peered at the terminal.

"Lass, it's a bit early to be reading such depressing topics, how about…" As he shifted his gaze to the girl, it was almost as if time stopped. Despite the girl's efforts at appearing calm, he knew she was anything but. Her jaw was clenched tightly, her face was flushed, and her body slightly shook as she stared resolutely at the screen; her hazel eyes betraying her façade as a layer of tears shimmered across them, illuminating the strange mixture of golden brown and sea green. Her body language told him all that was necessary. Joel had experienced much in his lifetime, though his mind seemed unwilling for a few moments to accept the possibility that one of his pupils had passed on. He placed a hand on Amber's shoulder, partially to offer silent support, and in part so that he could keep balance from the shock.

They stood there for a few minutes, both unsure what to say to each other. Joel was surprised when Amber broke the silence.

"I have to know why." Her words were soft, yet strained. For the first time that morning, she shifted her gaze from the screen to the librarian. Joel simply nodded.

"You will." He said, solemnly. The man had a difficult time coming to terms with the girl in front of him being alone. Before, the girls had each other. _They seemed content despite…everything. But now, this little lass just lost the only family she's likely got left. She's left putting the pieces together…it's just not right… _he thought, releasing his hand from the girl's shoulder. Her body slackened slightly at the loss of contact, a reaction that didn't go unnoticed by him. "Have you had any luck? Can I help at all?"

Amber slowly shook her head, appearing more disheartened by the moment. "Cancer, I think, but there's so many kinds, and it's really confusing. I don't know where to start." She dropped her head and rested her forehead on her palm.

Joel stood deep in thought for a few seconds before offering his hand to the girl. "I think you could probably use a break, child. Better to return to research with fresh eyes. In the meantime, I might have something to show you." Amber returned her gaze to the terminal momentarily before standing up and motioning for Joel to lead.

They soon found themselves stepping back into his office, the librarian once again offering her the seat in front of her desk. "Now, child, I might have a way to help you, but…well, you know your sister better than I do. However, I have a friend I meet for chess each Saturday morning…she's a doctor, and I'm sure she wouldn't have much issue offering some advice off the record." He noticed the brunette grow paler as she came to realize what he was asking. "It's nothing you need to do, lass. I can help in other ways… I simply feel that it might take longer. If you want, here's a datapad for you to type onto. I'll be tuning my piano in the meantime."

The old man rose from his seat and made his way over to the large black object resting along the wall. Amber watched as he lifted a panel of sorts on top of it, but soon found her gaze returning to the pad in front of her. _It's easier keeping it all up in my head. Makes it seem less real…but if it can help me get answers…what harm could there be in asking?_ She pondered, sniffling lightly as she started typing away. _I…I guess I'll just mention everything I know._ As she worked on the list, her focus would be occasionally be disturbed by the odd repeated sound behind her, slowly changing in tone as time passed. The sounds didn't last long, though, and when she lifted the pad in the air to signal she was done, Joel was soon beside her, copying the data and sending it off to his friend in a request for clarification. She sat still in the chair for about a minute before Joel motioned for her to join him at the large black object.

Sitting on the long bench beside him, she couldn't help but admire the elegant simplicity of it. _It's so shiny, and it's all black and white…I wonder what it's for?_ Her thoughts were quickly interrupted by the man gently touching a number of the small rectangular pieces nearest to them, which elicited a wondrous noise from the object. Amber's eyes grew wide in amazement. _This is what I heard the last time I was in here? This big black thing made those sounds?_

"I take it you haven't seen a real piano before, lass. Don't fault you for it, not many people see real ones these days. This was my family heirloom…should have passed to my older sister Catherine, but she didn't play, so she let me have it when my parents passed." He noted, his fingers resting on the sill. He looked over at Amber and pointed at the ornament hanging from her neck. "It's important to remember your loved ones in whatever ways you can. Each time I play this piano, I can hear my mother's laughter from when I fumbled at the keys…she was the one who taught me this beautiful instrument. Had the patience of a saint, she did. She'd teach me how each key…these rectangular bits… would work with the others. Now each time I play, I can remember all those hours with her. Sure I could remember them without the piano, but it's more vivid this way, for me."

Amber looked down and clutched at Melody's old necklace. She had felt guilty removing it from her sister, but she wanted something of Melody's with her. _It just feels wrong without her here…at least with this…with this I can actually feel she's with me in some way._ Amber's mind drifted to the day when her sister had gotten the necklace. _I swear, if Anderson wasn't there I would have been smiling and laughing with her…her laughter was always contagious, her smiles were always…hopeful. She always had hope. She…_

"I miss her." The words spilled out from her as she recalled the time she and her sister spent together.

Joel nodded slowly and repositioned his hands on the keys. "You know, my brother Warren died when he was only fifty three. He was a nice man, but he was a terror as a child. Always getting into trouble, he was. I play this whenever I find myself missing him." Joel proceeded to dance his fingers across the keys, performing an upbeat tune that brought a smile to both of their faces.

Amber sat still, studiously watching Joel's fingers, trying to figure out which made which noises_. It sounds so amazing…and he's really fast on his right hand but his left seems a little bit slower…I wonder how this thing makes those sounds?_ As Joel finished playing, Amber leaned forward toward the keys, staring at them intently.

"What was that called?" she asked, reaching out and lightly pressing down one of the narrow black keys; to her delight, it let out a rich, if simple, sound.

"That, lass, was a piece by Kabalevsky. I won't bore you with the details, though. It's…a rather fun thing to play." Joel said, wistfully. "The melody in it is simple, but playful. Easy enough for this old mind of mine to remember."

Amber's left eyebrow raised in confusion. "Melody?"

"Oh, uh, right. Well, it's a term in music. Basically represents a consistent succession of musical notes. Usually the ones at the front of the composition, I suppose. However, with more modern music, the rules have changed a bit. Especially with all the other species having their own interpretations of music, and music being much different than this. Still, it's usually the most memorable part of a composition or song" Joel said, scratching the top of his head lightly. "I could probably drone on more about it, but it'd be for naught. I'm not a professional musician. I just know how to play."

The brunette beside him sat quietly for a few moments before nodding. "Could…could you teach me? I mean, I have some extra money now, I can pay you, I think. If it's not too much trouble." She said, slightly flustered. "I…I really like how it sounds, and just hearing it kind of…calms me a little. I don't know. It's probably really hard and it will take a long time, but I can pay you…"

"Child, it's alright." Joel interrupted, placing a hand on her shoulder. "I can use the time I spent on writing workshops to teach you. Usually, Melody was the only one who would be there, so it's no trouble. Don't worry about payment either, lass. If it will help you, I'll try, but it takes a lot of practice, and it's boring at the start. Spend some of that money on a cheaper holo version of the instrument, so you can practice at home. When you're here, mine will be available to you. Nothing's better than the real thing, lass."

A beeping sound signaled from Joel's omni-tool, bringing him to pull up his comm. interface to view his message. His brow furrowed as he read the short message. "Child, if you can recall, how long was she showing these symptoms? The earliest possible moment you might have thought something could be wrong."

Amber's mind raced, skimming through recent memories for a clue to when it began._ I mean, I saw her vomit a few days ago for the first time, and collapse. But…she's been tired for a while. And she hadn't eaten as quickly as she normally would for a bit…That day she disappeared? Maybe add a week onto it? I kept telling her to rest because she seemed a bit more tired than normal…_

"Maybe…eight or nine weeks ago? Somewhere around that. I'm not sure when, because she was…she hid it pretty well. Or at least well enough to be able to make it seem like something less serious. So yeah, eight or nine weeks." She said, her words stumbling out. Joel nodded and quickly typed away a message on his omni-tool. Not a minute later, it was beeping again. This time, Joel's face darkened at the message.

"Lass, I'm not sure if you can answer this one but…is there a chance that something might have exposed you to element zero in the past year? My friend says it's…it's the only way those symptoms could present themselves so quickly." Joel said, frowning at the confused looking girl beside him.

"I don't even know what that stuff …what element zero is." Amber said, clearly frustrated. "What the heck is it?"

Joel stood up off the piano bench and moved over to his desk. "It's a chemical that helps spaceships travel, helps us to go from system to system through relays. However, it's fairly dangerous if the drive cores its part of are ruptured…cracked or broken…in some way. There haven't been many of those accidents, lass, but when they happen, it usually isn't safe to be around. Some are lucky and get those...what do they call them… 'biotic abilities'. The rest run the odds of getting sick. Not…not the easy kind of sick, child."

Amber had gotten up and began pacing around the room as he'd said the word 'biotic'. It all seemed familiar, but she was having a hard time remembering where she'd heard it before. _I haven't heard of element zero before, but…this sounds similar to something…God, when did I hear it first? Except it didn't seem that bad, if I…_

_Anderson._ Her memory returned to that discussion in the hospital, about her potential abilities. She clenched her fists as anger built within her. _He lied. Christ, he lied, and if we'd have known, we were…we were at a hospital! They could have checked, maybe…maybe they could give her treatment or stop whatever…oh my god. Oh my god! Why didn't he tell me? Why the fuck didn't he tell me?_

"There was a man from the Alliance. He told me once that people might want me for some potential or some crap. I didn't get it at the time, but he described a bunch of stuff to me. Didn't seem important, he played it all off as harmless accidents. Told me people got the flu at worst, or something. Fuck!" Amber exclaimed, her words laced with vitriol as she continued to pace angrily.

"Language, lass!" Joel shot out immediately as a warning. He knew she was angry, but he didn't appreciate curse words in his little sanctuary. "It seems to be the only answer for what ailed your dear sister. You don't need to go read up on it now. Best you don't dig up that dreadful stuff, anyway."

"No, now I have to read it. If Melody died from it, then I need to know about it because it could happen to me, or others in the future. I need to know, Joel. I need to know what the people who did this knew before they put me and Mel in danger… what they're willing to do to get kids like me." Amber said resolutely, as she moved toward the door.

Joel merely sat down and stared at the girl as she left the office. "Child, I hope this won't taint your soul. You've been through enough hurt." He whispered to himself, sending a quick thank you to his friend. "She won't be so thankful when she finds out what happens. Singapore…my lord."

* * *

Amber sat at her terminal, leaning toward the screen with intense focus as she scrolled through article after article. Initially, it seemed like a blur of improbable information; each account of side-effects seemingly exaggerated and overblown. It was when she dug up pictures of some affected by the Singapore incident that those accounts began seeming more truthful than the reports that made mention of lesser side-effects. The event in Singapore was a long time ago, but reading all of the updates on the event after the fact led to more and more grisly details, vids and pictures. The death toll was something she simply could not imagine, a number that seemed far too high to be reasonable. Her eyes kept catching one company's name in the headlines and articles, 'Conatix', and how they had begun studying the effects of exposure to element zero, or 'eezo' for short. Later articles reported that same company helped train and build equipment for children with biotic abilities alongside the Alliance. _Something to remember for later, maybe they have some hand in this?_

Amber could still hardly believe it was real. She scrolled through an article and focused on an embedded picture of a young boy covered in tumours. _He's so young, but…god, his wounds look just like Mel's…_ she thought to herself as she tore her eyes away from the picture and back to the text. She had a reasonable vocabulary, but much of the information went over her head, and searches on what a lot of it meant usually offered even more convoluted jargon_. I don't think I'm going to get much in terms of how this happened or whatever. I don't understand what…whatever 'peripheral neuropathy' is…or whatever the hell 'mitosis', 'metastasis' or 'apoptosis' or a bunch of this junk is…I'll keep reading, but jeez. I wish whoever wrote these things would be a little kinder to people who aren't probably doctors or geniuses. _

As she scrolled down, she noticed a link that seemed promising. _Hrm, either a facts page will give me a lot of easy info, or it'll be a waste and full of all these weird words. I wish I was a doctor, even just for today, so I would know what the hell I'm looking at._ Clicking the link, she found a page full of numbers and ratios. After a quick scan, most of it was what she'd been told by Anderson, just worse in the side-effects; however, some of the information was news to her. _Okay, so ten percent of unborn kids wind up as biotics, I got that…and…and about thirty percent aren't affected at all. The rest are born with birth defects or get cancer sometime a bit later in their childhood…or both if a kid's unlucky I guess. Jeez. That's a lot worse than the flu or mono, Anderson._

Amber looked away from the screen for a moment, collecting her thoughts. _So, let's say that Mel and I were exposed to this eezo stuff again. If that's the only way she could have died, then that means it must have been recent, so…hrm…maybe that's what Viola was talking about that night at the diner, how the reds screwed up when they wrecked the orphanage. Maybe they…huh._ Amber's world stopped spinning as parts of the puzzle slowly started to come together. _Viola wants to 'help' me, and she was the one who hired the reds anyway. She…she must have wanted us to get hit by the eezo stuff again. Apparently it's like dust or something? Maybe that's why we were coughing so much, on top of the building falling apart and all…so if she did want us to get hit by more eezo, then she must have had an idea about how it would affect us. Mel and I must have been in that forty percent bracket of kids that didn't die, so that's why they wanted us. Our 'potential' as Anderson said. It was never a sure thing, they were gambling. If we reacted like unborn kids did again, the odds were against us living, right? Fuck. But...what about people who had already been born and were exposed?_

Amber returned her focus to the terminal and shifted over to the statistics for adults and children, slowly reading down the list and gathering her thoughts. _Alright…Well, sixty-five percent are unaffected, but it seems most of the rest tend to develop 'cancerous tumours'…those welts I guess… lots of lung and …uh…throat cancer…wow, didn't even know that could happen. Maybe that's why Mel had a hard time eating and drinking? She'd…try to swallow and sometimes it just…_She wiped her eyes to stem her tears before they began. _I need to focus…I mean, there's no mention of adults having those tumours all over their bodies after exposure, just those affected before they were born…those ones got it. So maybe…maybe getting hit by eezo a second time combined the worst of both sides? Fuck, I need to…I need to not think the worst here. Maybe it was a fluke? What else is there…_

Again, she scrolled down the list and found herself looking at pregnancy statistics. Amber leaned back and scratched her head as she started reading the page. _Huh, I guess it would make sense for…oh. Oh god, that's…that's bad. Christ, that's bad._

Amber turned away from the terminal and wiped at her eyes again, unsuccessful in her attempt to stop hot tears from streaking down her cheeks. _Fifteen percent die before even being born? And..and…what the fuck are complications? What the hell does that even mean, and how do you die from it? Did…did my mom…is that why….did I kill my mom?_

Her mind raced frantically at the prospects before her; she wasn't aware she'd gotten up and began pacing wildly around the area_. Is my mom dead because of me? Did my dad hate me and orphan me because…oh god, is that…if it happened to me, what about all the other orphans? God, maybe we all deserve this shitty existence…_

Noticing she was a few metres away from her terminal, Amber stopped and clutched Melody's necklace, the contact soothing her fury. She closed her eyes and took a deep calming breath. _Okay, Amber, just relax a bit, just think. Only about twenty percent or so die. Maybe…maybe I didn't. Maybe she didn't….but…if she did, then this …this stole that life from me. From all of us. It's not my fault, it's whoever exposed us all to that eezo shit. Whether it's Conatix or whoever…sweet lord, I'll have my vengeance. If not for me, for Mel, for all those others who died without a good home, without a family_. Amber walked over to the terminal and logged off. _I'm sick of this. No one should suffer like that, like Mel did. I can't make that right, but I…I swear I'll do my best to make sure it happens less. That those sick fucks who do this, who cause this kind of pain..._

Amber relented her internal ranting, coming to the realization that she was in no state to do any of what she wanted. _I'm just a fourteen year old, skinny little homeless girl. I'm alone._ Her thoughts were clouded in uncertainty, but she refused to linger on her new state of living. _How the heck can I do what I need to? Hell, I still need to get Mel buried and…_

She stood, stunned at how simple it needed to be, how simple the solution was. Every fiber of her being ached in disgust at what she knew she'd need to do, but it was the only way to accomplish all of her goals.

_Viola._

* * *

**A/N: *Exasperated sigh* This chapter took longer than expected. I tried writing this in the days right after I posted chapter 11, but it was just a bit difficult for me. It felt too empty. Took me a while to understand that I was supposed to feel that way, that it'd help in writing this. I considered making this longer, adding a scene at the end with Viola, but I figured it would be unnecessary. This isn't exactly an action packed chapter or anything, just something setting up the rest of the earth arc, as well as laying some foundation for Amber's mindset going forward. It's hard to manage grief…everyone deals with it differently, and at this point in time my character's kind of messed up and not really talking straight with me. It'll be interesting to see where this all takes me, going forward. **

**Anywho, the response to the last chapter was heartwarming. Honestly, it's probably the only chapter where I've been 100% happy with my writing, and to know that more people than just myself felt sad over the loss of Melody…it means a lot. It's been wonderful having you all along for this wild ride, and I hope you enjoy this entry and those to come. **

**Once again, my eternal thanks go out to all who have read my story, all who have set it to alert, all who have provided feedback…you make this a much easier task than it otherwise would be. I'm grateful that you take time out of your day to read my little origin story, and I'll continue to try and earn that time from you :)**

**Have a wonderful week!**


	13. Chapter 13

Amber stood at the window of her new quarters, staring out at the growing snowstorm that threatened to blanket the city. It was a strange sensation, feeling warm when it was so cold outside. None of the orphanages she'd lived in had very good insulation, and her old home with Melody had been cool and damp at the best of times. She moved her hand over top of a nearby heating vent and marveled at the warmth. Her new living conditions would take some getting used to, but it was at least comfortable, if a bit jarring. The room was smallish and sparse; enough room for a bed, a small table hosting her new holo-piano, a small cabinet for clothes, and a small space to walk around. It wasn't much, but it was more than she had expected when negotiating with Viola.

All things considered, the meeting had gone well; Viola had arranged for a small tract of land just outside of the city to be used for Melody's burial, and they'd gotten her under the ground and the seed planted before the snow hit. _Surprising, really. Viola didn't even blink an eye or ask about it. Must be more desperate than I thought_. She'd been assured that the area would be well maintained, and that the tree would grow, but Amber still decided that she'd visit often once spring came around, to ensure their promise was kept. Outside of her sister's requests, Amber had asked that she be given two days of the week to visit the library and walk around downtown. The facility she'd been moved to was on the opposite edge of the city, so there wouldn't be any random park visits, or daily visits to see Joel anymore. Still, she'd get to see him, and she'd get some time to gather her thoughts and plan.

She'd hadn't even been at her new place for a week, and she was missing her home. She missed how clammy it got in the evening, the creak of the grate on windy nights, their home-made bed. Amber looked woefully at her new one, nestled in the corner of the room and shook her head slowly._ I'm not sure I'll be able to sleep on that anymore. At least not tonight. _She moved over to her cabinet and pulled out her old blankets and sheets, which Viola's people were kind enough to clean, even if it got rid of some of its character.

Amber delicately knelt on the ground and began to spread her blankets and sheets on the carpeted floor, her body aching from the day's activities. Viola's people had her mostly performing fitness tests like shuttle runs, running up and down stairs, swimming, and running around the facility; occasionally she'd be prompted to lift some light weights, but it seemed their focus was mostly cardio for the meantime. Though her muscles were sore all over, she took solace that she was getting fed far more than she ever had. _Three meals a day! I don't think I've ever seen so much real food... like, a big slab of chicken instead of tiny cubes, and potatoes that have flavour!_ She thought to herself, excitedly. For the first time in a long while, she'd be going to sleep with a full belly. Amber pulled the pillow from her mattress and rested it at the top of the improvised bed; she looked it over and couldn't help but think something was missing.

She stood up and moved to the wall, flicking the lights off, casting the room in darkness. Her composure wavered for a moment as she turned back to her bed; in the darkness it looked so similar to her old one made of coats and stolen sheets. Amber reached under her shirt and pulled Melody's necklace up to her lips, holding it there for a second before returning it to its place. Her hand grabbed an extra pillow as she passed by her old belongings and kept hold of it as she laid herself down on the makeshift bed, hugging it tight against her. _It's not Melody, but…it's enough._

* * *

Viola paced nervously in her condo's living room, her mind returning over and over to the last message from her Cerberus contact. In truth, she had expected a similar response, but not so soon after acquiring the girl. The young brunette was her last live test subject, and she wanted to make her count; several children were salvaged from the orphanage after the crash, but they had all died of complications. _Still, valuable data I felt would have bought me more time, especially with Cerberus having made the recommendation to select the Reds as a cover. The whole ordeal was hardly my fault, at least in full. _

The raven haired woman made her way into her room and sat down at the edge of her bed, mulling over her options going forward. _I was promised that this would be my study, that I would be provided the resources so long as I was successful in learning about the effects of second exposure. I've gotten results so far, from the other children, and from that one mission in the upper city. I'm building evidence, it's no time to jump in and interrupt my study of her!_ Viola checked the clock, noticing it was nearly midnight. _I'll at least get one good session in with her before my contact visits. Perhaps that will allow me some time to figure out what Cerberus is up to. _

She quickly changed and got into bed, pulling a datapad from her night table to check over her new subject's statistics from her training regimen. _The girl is relatively quick, but weak and wasn't often able to run for long distances. Still, her scores aren't terrible considering her health. She's still quite gaunt, and her legs are a thin as a bird's. It'll take some time for her to fill out and gain strength, but she's doing well so far. Hasn't complained yet, at least, though I'm certain she must be exhausted._

_Perhaps with a little luck, we'll get through this._

* * *

Amber knelt on the mat beneath her, remaining as still as she possibly could while staring intently at the screen in front of her. Biofeedback training was an entirely new thing to her; she understood running and swimming, but having sensors attached to you while staring at a bunch of weird shapes on a display was foreign to her. Viola ran this aspect of the training personally, which tended to distract her from her tasks at hand. _Focus, she says. Relax, she says. Telling me to focus on my heart beats or how warm or cold I am or whatever. As if I can relax with her here, with what I know…_ she thought, her eyes still locked on the display in front of her. _Still, if I want to be prepared for what I need to do in the future, I need to…I need to do this training and put this aside for now._

In truth, the training was fairly enjoyable; she knew that learning to calm her body and mind would provide a valuable tool in reaching her goal. It was also a nice reprieve after long hours of cardio workouts. It had been a risky decision to join Viola's training program, but it had been relatively easy-going thus far. _Just a bunch of running and relaxing. I kind of expected…well, I don't know, but a hell of a lot worse than this. _

Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Viola abruptly move across the room toward the door. The woman looked back at her and for a split second, Amber saw her face shift slightly. _Is that…is she worried? I wonder what she's up to? _She thought to herself as she saw Viola disappear through the doorway. Seconds later, her display prompted her with a message to head down to the pool for her regular program. _Well, alright then._

The walk to the pool wasn't a short one, and it gave her time to stretch herself and warm up beforehand. The pool was usually the bright spot of her day, ever since she'd learned how to swim when she was younger, she cherished the few times she'd have the opportunity; that it was a daily event for her now didn't remove any of the lustre. The smell of the pool alone was enough to get Amber giddy. The only annoyance was that the pool was slightly off the grounds of the facility, and the general public was free to swim alongside her. They would normally schedule her for mid-afternoon swims at the latest, to avoid congestion, but the pool hadn't seemed that popular even in the later hours. It hadn't been troublesome yet, but she was sure eventually that the patrons there would get on her nerves._ Back on the streets, they'd treat me like I didn't exist, or they'd insult me or push me around. Even if that doesn't happen here, it'll probably be because they don't know what I am, and that'll just piss me off even more._

She strolled through the doors and made a beeline for the changing room, finding it empty aside from a single older woman getting dressed. _Good. Perhaps I'll have it to myself today?_ She picked up her bodysuit from her dufflebag and gave it a look over. _This thing is probably the least enjoyable bit about swimming. I don't see why I can't swim in normal clothes, or even a tee and shorts, but whatever. Hell, I'd swim naked if people wouldn't make such a big deal about it. I just wish this thing didn't make me feel like my whole body's being strangled._

Her hopes for being the sole swimmer were dashed by the sounds of another in the water, as she made her way poolside. Her posture slouched a bit at the disappointing realization, but she shrugged it off and dove in, deciding it wouldn't ruin the joy of the moment. The familiar rush of water exploded around her as she impacted the surface; despite the childishness of the maneuver, she loved entering the pool with as big of a splash as she could muster. As she scanned the pool from underwater, she smiled noticing the other swimmer hadn't taken note of her, or simply didn't care. _Good. It'll be a lot easier knowing everyone here can do their own thing. _

The following hour or so went smoothly, the two of them swimming aside opposite walls; the other girl seemed keen on practicing her backstroke, where Amber worked on her front crawl. She wasn't the most technical swimmer, she had no idea how to do a proper breaststroke or butterfly, but she enjoyed the simplicity of her usual technique. It allowed her to work her cardio and easily focus on getting better lap times, while still having fun. Amber wasn't sure when, but the other swimmer vacated the pool somewhere in that time-span; the brunette remained unaware that anyone was left around the pool until she decided to grab a ledge at the end of the pool and catch a breather.

A noise off to her left caught her attention, her eyes catching the form of the swimmer she'd seen earlier; the newcomer sat along the edge of the pool, her feet lightly swaying in the water as she stared worriedly at the lithe brunette. She was an older looking dark haired girl, probably midway through her teens at least. Amber wiped at her ears and tilted her head, trying to get the water out of them.

"What?" she asked, hoping the message wasn't all that important. _Who is this person? And why is everyone looking at me like this today?_

"Do you need any help?" the new girl asked, tucking a strand of hair behind her own ear. Amber studied the girl, curious about why she was still there. _Well, I mean, I love the pool, so I wouldn't really be opposed to just hanging out by it, but at the same time, I'm not sure why she's offering help, or looking at me like that. I don't have as much muscle as she does, but whatever, I make due._

"I feel fine enough." She replied, her voice displaying her caution openly. "Thanks though."

Amber quickly went back to swimming, but as she made each return lap, she could see those two legs gently kicking in the water. Amber stole a glance at the girl, confused at why she was still hanging around, and saw her quickly avert her gaze. Eventually, Amber made her way over to the ladder, slightly annoyed at the attention she was getting from the onlooker. As she made her way up the ladder, the raven-haired girl stood and made her way over; Amber ignored the girl's presence and continued quickly toward the changing room. She could hear the soggy footsteps behind her keeping a short distance between the two of them.

"Why are you following me?" Amber asked, trying to keep calm. _I don't like this. There's no reason for her to be here anymore. I told her I was fine._

A short silence filled the air before she received an answer. "What makes you think I'm following you?"

"Because you've been sitting poolside for a long time when you could have gotten changed. Of course you're following me, or you stuck around and decided to watch me or something. Which is it?" Amber made her way into the changing room and over to her locker, plopping herself down on the bench. The older girl slowly made her way to a bench opposite her and sat down.

"I…I'm sorry. It's none of my business." The girl seemed sincere enough, lowering her head slightly and staring intently at one of the drains on the floor. Amber shook her head, slipping out of the composite bodysuit. _At least she understands she was being a bit of a jerk, but… _Amber thought, her focus broken as the girl's gaze shot toward the bodysuit Amber had dropped to the floor, and then up to her bare form. She knew that look well, and felt her cheeks flush in frustration. _Only one person was allowed to look at me like that._

"You're right it's none of your business, but you're the one who sat poolside staring at me like a creeper, then hounded after me when I left. Why?" Amber asked gruffly, pulling her dufflebag up onto the bench and grabbing a towel from it. She noticed the dark haired girl's eyes were wide-open, staring at her. _For fuck's sake._

"You…uh, look…I didn't mean to intrude but…you didn't look like you could do ten minutes of laps, let alone a full hour or so. I mean…again, it's not my business, and I don't know why I even did this, it's embarrassing, but if you're anorexic, I…" The girl was stumbling over her words in her pseudo-apology, appearing more downcast as she spoke, but Amber had heard enough.

"I don't know or care what anorexic means, and I'm sorry I don't look fit or active enough for you." Amber said, frustration dripping from each syllable.

"You're just really thin, and..." Amber nearly exploded at the girl's words, memories of her sister's frail body saturating her mind.

"Oh, fuck off! You've probably never even went a day without eating before. How about you stop assuming shit about people and just let everyone do their own thing?" She said, shaking her head angrily as she took out a fresh pair of clothes, laying them beside her. "I'm going to have a shower, and I really hope you've taken the hint by now that I don't want you in there with me. I hope that next time I see you, you leave me the hell alone."

Amber stormed toward the showers, dropping her towel at the entrance before walking in and finding an empty stall. The calm stream of warm water would have been welcome and relaxing on most other days, but she'd been worked into something of a frenzy. _I don't even know why I'm so mad at her, she obviously was just worried, but goddamnit, she should have just stayed away from me. I told her in the pool that I was fine… I'm fine. Mel would want me to be nicer, I know…but I don't want anyone's pity or anything. I saw how she looked at me, and …and…_

She found her legs failing, and allowed herself to slump down against the floor, the shower's streams and her sopping wet hair masking the tears flowing freely down her cheeks. _God, I miss her so much right now. _

* * *

"It's not a necessary measure at this point in her development, Fiske." Viola said, her icy glare focused on the man across her dining room table. "She is already developing ahead of schedule, there is zero need for your intrusion."

The Cerberus agent, Fiske, hadn't been pleased with her over the fact that the girl wasn't immediately available to him, but she knew the agent was a patient enough man. _Also a schemer, but I certainly wouldn't say it to his face. _

"Miss Guzman, Cerberus merely wants to ensure the success of the experiment. You, of all people, should be able to understand that much. That is why you came to us in the first place, is it not?" the man asked, leaning back as he took a drag of his cigarette. Viola hated when people smoked in her home, and her objections to his smoking had thus far gone ignored.

"I responded to your inquiry about transferring the project from the Alliance to your employers. I made that decision on the conditions provided to me, that I would be given the resources to proceed with my study, and the freedom to pursue my own findings rather than be restricted by bureaucrats and red tape. I also agreed on the condition that I would still be leading this experiment, and that is not a condition I'm about to negotiate after the fact." Viola stated firmly. Her opponent merely smirked.

"Miss Guzman, I'm merely presenting you with your new reality. The winds of change have swept through Conatix, have you heard?" he asked, his eyes boring into hers. Viola remained silent, indignantly raising an eyebrow. "As you may or may not know, one of your kids has jeopardized the program at Jump Zero."

Viola quickly interjected. "Not one of mine. Jump Zero was under different supervision. Still Conatix, but I have had no part in it since they brought in that turian."

"Well that turian was just killed, and the Alliance is panicking, pulling funding. They're classifying everything, and Conatix is getting left in the lurch. It's rather funny, really. Your beloved Conatix goes behind the council's backs to speed up the progression of biotic training by hiring turians, even after asserting you want to strengthen humans, not make them appear weak. Let it be a reminder for you next time you want progress without compromising your morals…Cerberus is always willing to help push humanity forward." He took another drag of his cigarette and put it out on Viola's table. The act incensed her, but she held her tongue until she calmed down. _It wouldn't be good to curse out a financier. I have to stay level headed, I know he's trying to disrupt me._

"And what is the point of this? I understand Conatix isn't in the greatest financial situation, but our engineering contracts are enough to keep us afloat, certainly, even if no more major programs open up. Certainly, our research programs would likely pull in good enough funding from interested third parties…" Her words trailed off as she began to process the implications of the Alliance pulling their funding. _Everything that's left are smaller contracts and our implant manufacturing. Investors won't be happy at that instability, unless…_

"I assume your silence means you've come to an understanding, Miss Guzman. Conatix, as it is, will be ending soon. It cannot function properly as a single public company, so it shall be fractured, and operated much in the same way. However, it will mean that there won't be any public investors. Of course, Cerberus has already made the offer to help Conatix operate more efficiently, while providing resources the Alliance were reluctant to invest. One that I have no doubt it will assuredly take. As I have been the primary director of operations with Conatix already, I am primed to take over such operations for Cerberus. Which leaves you in a peculiar situation, Miss Guzman." Viola wanted to believe he was bluffing, but it added up. _Still, I'm not about to let my project slip through my fingers. _

"This may very well be the case, Fiske, but it does not change the fact that my project has yielded results so far, and my current subject has acclimated to biofeedback training twenty-nine percent faster than Jump Zero's best graduates. Some of the former subjects also provided higher than average results prior to succumbing to their ailments. My methods are sound, there is no need for interference. Besides, she has been more than willing to exert herself to her boundaries in testing, where many are reluctant. She wants to be here." Viola stood from her chair and walked over to the window behind her. "Cerberus cares about results, and I'm getting them. If you're about to have so much power soon, certainly you can open up another separate study for whatever methods you feel are appropriate, Fiske. Do not interfere with mine."

She heard the man behind her get up from his chair and collect his coat from the nearby rack. "Miss Guzman, I came here to supervise. You have been getting results, I do not contest that. However, we both know there's a trend in how the girl's biotic abilities activate, a habitual restriction in how she comes to focus. I will trust you with our resources for as long as you get results. I am simply letting you know that if the time comes to make a difficult decision, you will have two options. One of those will result in the continuation of Cerberus' resources and support. The other option…would be less than optimal for you and what's left of your family. Have a good night, Miss Guzman."

She didn't even hear the door shut as he left, too wrapped up in her own thoughts to afford such a minor event any attention. She had heard a rumour that Cerberus had been a segment of the Alliance once, and thought they were similar, but without red tape_. Sure, I mean, we went and killed a bunch of gang members, but that was justified in a lot of ways. The blatant threat Fiske made was…I cannot believe they would go so far as to threaten me if I don't make a decision they prefer. Am I truly in control of this project, or am I merely here as a recognizable face for the child?_

Viola hazily made her way into the living room and sat down in her chair, instinctively picking up the holo of herself and her sister. _Everything was simpler then, wasn't it, Kate?_ She recalled the day the picture was taken; they had visited their uncle's cottage for the weekend. _It was such a wonderful day…the sun was blazing hot, but we had the lake to cool us off. I remember hoisting you on my shoulders and charging off the deck into it. You'd laugh and yell all the way, your arms reaching to the sky in excitement, and you'd swim back ashore before I would, you little tadpole…Dad caught us coming out of the water together and took the picture. I knew it wasn't necessary for me. I could never forget that day, but I'm glad he kept it. I miss seeing your face. If only you were here now, I…_

"Viola? Are you home?" A voice called out from the foyer, footsteps growing closer. Her niece peeked into the livingroom and slowly made her way over to her. Viola placed the holo back on the end table and smiled at the girl. _Well, at least she's the spitting image of you…_

"Oh, yes, I'm home. Sorry, I was…distracted." She replied, getting up and motioning for the girl to follow her to the kitchen. "How was your swim, Faridah?"

Her niece quickly made her way to her regular seat and slumped down onto it. "It was fine, I guess." Viola gave her a cursory glance as she opened the fridge.

"You were there for nearly thirty minutes longer than normal." Viola noted. _Thankfully, otherwise she would have been here when Fiske showed up. That would have been unpleasant, and would remind me never again to move so close to where I work._ "Certainly it was more than 'just fine'."

Faridah sighed loudly and shifted her gaze to her placemat."Leftovers tonight, I presume?"

Viola pulled out the remains of the previous night's roast dinner. _Leftovers are a perfectly acceptable meal…hrm. She's normally much subtler than this when she avoids my inquiries._ "Yes, but it seems you're avoiding my question."

"Swimming was fine. I just made a fool of myself, is all. It's nothing, really." Her niece said, still staring at the green and white checkered placemat as if it has all the answers in the world.

Viola placed the food in the oven to heat up, and then sat down adjacent to the girl. "Faridah, there are many words I could use to describe you, but fool is not among them. If something had you thinking yourself a fool, it's certainly not 'nothing'."

"Another girl was there when I was swimming and…I don't know, I just…she was skeletal. Like, ribs poking out of her chest. I kind of stuck around after I finished practicing. She looked like she wasn't capable of walking, let alone swimming, so I waited for her in case she needed help. I just didn't want her to drown, and there wasn't a lifeguard around, and…and she made me realize I was being a bit of a jerk." Faridah pouted. "I thought I was doing the right thing, staying even after she said she was fine, but she was pretty angry about it."

Viola reached over to her niece and pulled her gaze up to meet her own. "Don't doubt that you did the right thing. Your intentions were noble, and I'm proud of you for wanting to help. Some people are resistant to offers of help. That girl in particular is rather stubborn about it. Do not take her reaction to heart, I'm certain she would have made a similar decision were she in your shoes."

Faridah smiled uncertainly and nodded. "Is she one of the people you're helping? In your program?"

Viola realized she'd slipped unnecessary information, and tensed slightly. _The girl will hound me for all I'm worth if her curiosity isn't sated. Perhaps a small tidbit of information wouldn't hurt, to appease her_. "She's a recent volunteer, yes. Right now we're just trying to get her properly fed and in shape. As you seem to have found out, she is in fairly decent shape given her condition, though she could certainly use to gain a bit of weight. She is a rather determined young lady, though. Her reaction is…understandable enough."

Her niece just shook her head, her mouth twisted to the side. "I'm probably going to run into her again at the pool, too, aren't I?" she asked, looking over to her Aunt who gave a silent nod. "It's kind of weird. What did her parents feed her, anyway? Seriously, that's just…not right for someone to be that thin."

"Now, Faridah, that's insensitive. Not everyone can help how they look. Besides, I've seen worse than that girl, even recently. It's simply fortunate that she accepted the offer I proposed to her." Viola said, checking behind her to see if the food was ready. _Two more minutes._

"What's her name? I mean, not that I'm going to apologize or anything, because she doesn't want me within ten feet of her, but you know, just in case…I mean, we're going to be swimming around each other pretty often, so it'd be good to know, and…" Faridah was babbling, and Viola knew she would soon say something she'd likely find embarrassing._ I could let her keep going, but it's best that she not feel any worse about the incident. Still…_

"I'm afraid you are going to have to ask her that yourself. It's a personal question, and should be answered in person." She said, getting up and preparing plates and silverware as the timer finished its countdown.

"You're just saying that because of that stupid confidentiality stuff." The girl remarked with minor annoyance. "Oh well, it's not likely I'll ever talk to her again, anyway. Is dinner almost ready? The meat isn't totally dried out, is it?"

Viola smiled at the accusation and continued preparing dinner, while mentally preparing for the coming change to Conatix. _I went into Conatix for good reasons. I do what I do because I know it will help future generations. I just hope that Cerberus isn't the sort to lead Conatix's ideals…my ideals… to destruction. To scuttle them… to render them flotsam. I will not let them take that from me. Kate, please believe I can still do this._

The timer rang out, filling the kitchen obnoxiously. _For now, though…I still have this. I still have time. _

* * *

**A/N: Wow, alright. Not a very action packed chapter, but lots of dialogue. Took a while to write because there weren't many times for me to sit down and mill away at this uninterrupted. It took until this morning to finally finish the last 200 words. Which turned into the last 1400 words, actually. Strange how that happens.**

**Anywho, I'm off to celebrate my birthday by myself until my friends show up later. :) That pulled pork won't cook itself!**

**So many thanks to all who have been reading and the most wonderful of thumbs up to those who have kindly provided feedback/alerted the story/fav'ed the story/etc. All of you are incredible! I hope I'll have time Saturday to work on the next chapter, but…well, I'm not certain. Still, I'm trying to finish the Earth arc by the time I start school (early September). I think I can accomplish it!**

**So yeah, have an amazing day, I know I will!**


	14. Chapter 14

_December 23rd 2168_

* * *

"So, like this?" Amber asked, performing the practice exercises again for the sixth time. The sad smile on his face as she finished told her that once again, she hadn't done it properly. They had been sitting at the piano for going on two hours, and she felt as if she wasn't making any progress. _I don't get it, what am I doing wrong?_ She thought, sighing and resting her hands at her side. "I hit every note, Joel. Am I missing something?"

"Child, you're too stiff, and you're all hunched over. If you're going to play piano, you're going to need to approach it properly." He said, patting her on the shoulder.

"What does it matter, if I'm hitting all the notes? I mean, I did hit all the notes. That's what's important, right?" Amber scrunched her nose up a little in frustration. "And my fingers are getting faster. I can move them separately a bit easier."

"That's true. I'm not trying to take that away from you, but you need better posture when you're playing, or you won't be able to play for long. At worst, you could get hurt. I know it's a mite bit annoying, but it's important, lass." Amber looked up at him, confused. _How can a piano hurt me? What?_ Joel saw her confusion and continued.

"Consider this. You've been playing for about two hours today, does your back feel tight?" he asked, appearing slightly concerned. Amber nodded and shrugged her shoulders. "That's what happens with bad posture. It's not the proper way to treat your body, and it winds up putting too much energy toward hitting the keys. Here, stand up Amber." He said, bringing himself to his feet slowly. She quickly followed suit and stood in front of him.

Joel offered Amber a handshake, which she took nonchalantly. His firm squeeze took her by surprise and brought a slight yelp out of her, as he held the grip and shook her hand a few times before letting go.

"What was that for?" she asked, frustrated and cradling her sore hand.

"If I were at a social gathering and met everyone I knew with a similar handshake, my hand would be dead tired by the end of the night, and my friends would be as sore as you. If I instead offered a more efficient handshake, allowing the gravity and my limb to do most of the work for me, I would still be fresh by the end of the night, and my friends won't have felt uncomfortable. The same goes for playing the piano. You're going to be spending a lot of time with it, so you'd best treat it properly, and approach it properly."

Amber glanced back at the piano and frowned. "It's not living though. Does it really make a difference?"

"It's a good quality to learn, lass. Posture is body language, and body language is a universal part of everyone in the galaxy. The way you play… you look angry, less controlled, and amateurish. Yes, you're getting the job done, but you don't look stable. You don't look like you're respectful of the piano. The piano's going to lash back, and you're going to be aching afterward. Whereas with proper posture, you'd look in control yet relaxed, respectful…if you approach someone angrily, you should expect them to react in kind. If you learn how to use body language to your advantage, you can avoid outbursts and avoid unnecessary conflict. If you can learn to play a piano with respect toward it, you can learn to interact with people with respect. A little body language can go a long way to getting people to believe you, to believe in you. The…concept of posture is the same, though the methods are a bit different between the two. Still, you treat the piano with respect, and you won't be sore after playing. It will be effortless. It's important, child. It's just a way to prevent you from getting hurt, and will help you be a better player in the future."

Amber stood there and stared at him for a few moments, thinking. _I guess he's right. I mean, I remember when I was in the hospital and Anderson came in all tense and asked where Mel was. It made me tense, and that made me react the way I did. And the other day at the pool…_

"I guess I should learn it then. I mean, there's no harm, right? But…how?" she asked, moving back to the piano.

Joel moved to her side, but didn't sit. "Well, let's start with your feet…they're the key to being stable while playing, keeping your balance. They need to be flat on the ground, not too close to each other, but not too far. Position them where you would be comfortable standing. That distance is good." Joel waited for Amber to shift her feet into a proper place. "Good, now…"

It had taken the rest of the afternoon to get the basics of posture down, but Amber had immediately noticed that playing was a bit easier, if less accurate at the moment. She knew that would just come with time, trusting her body to be able to do what she wanted it to do.

As she waited for her ride to arrive, she scrawled out a note and approached Joel with it. She'd been relatively happy with how training at the facility had been going, but she wasn't about to let herself be blindsided without some backup in case something went wrong.

"What's this, lass?" Joel asked, confused, handling the small folded up piece of paper she had given him.

Amber shrugged and looked toward the entrance. "It's a note."

"You could just send it to my omni-tool. I know you have one. Easier that way, child." He noted, giving her a curious look. Amber shook her head.

"No, that's…that's not really secure enough. I need you to hold onto this for me. I…" She knew what she wanted to say, but the words were catching in her throat. She didn't want him to be worried, but it was necessary to have this plan in case the training went too far downhill.

"Is something wrong?" Joel's voice was rife with concern and he leaned down toward her. "Are you unsafe where you are?"

"I'm fine right now. I'm just…well, I don't trust the people who are helping me. If I miss a few straight visits…bring this to the address in person. I'm not sure if it will work, but…it's worth a try. I know this might sound scary, and I'm being a little paranoid, but…it's the only thing I can think of that could keep me safe. Please…you might not even need to use it, but if you could do me this one last favour, I'd be so thankful." She stood there shifting her weight back and forth from one leg to another. Joel took a long look at her before pocketing the slip of paper.

"Anything for you, child. If this can help you, I'll make sure to keep it safe. Just…promise me you'll stay as safe as you can." He stated sadly, his hand ruffling her curls. "You've been dealt a crap hand, you don't deserve any more trouble."

Amber nodded and smiled up at him. "Well, you get what you get. I'll just have to make the best of it." She said, looking back toward the entrance, noticing her ride. "Thank you, Joel. I'll be back in three days."

"Take care, lass, and have a merry Christmas." She heard behind her as she made her way out of the library into the snowy December weather. _With all this snow, I think I could use a swim._

* * *

The pool was unsurprisingly busy; it was much like the previous two Thursday nights, with families wading in the shallow end, and students from nearby schools enjoying a good evening swim. She had avoided swimming those past evenings, but felt particularly compelled to take part this time. _Well, no way I'm going to be able to swim end to end and practice tonight. Meh… at least I can get in some form of swimming. Might be nice to take it easy for once. _She hopped over to the change room and found an empty locker, cursing that it was so far away from the showers. After she'd changed and locked up her belongings, she made her way out of the changing room, only for a familiar face to walk in as she was leaving. _That girl…_

Amber wasn't sure what her own face looked like, reacting to her surprise presence, but it seemed to send the girl darting off toward the side lockers quickly. _Well that's odd…_ she thought, taking a moment at the doors. _Though, I guess I did kind of blow up at her. But…I didn't mean to scare her…_

Swimming, she found out quickly, just wasn't nearly as fun with other people around. _Or at least, when other people are constantly getting in my way. It's like they want to keep anyone from doing anything except floating in a single spot. I love the water, but this is…kind of annoying. _Amber looked around at the others nearby in the pool; parents lightly splashing their children or teaching them to swim, friends goofing off together and jumping in the pool. _Everyone here's having a good time…everyone's having fun with each other except me. I…this was a mistake. I just lost…and it's not these people's fault she's gone and that I feel like this. _

Amber slowly made her way to the nearest edge of the pool and perched herself upon it, shaking the water out of her hair. It had been a frustrating week; progress in biofeedback and biotics training had stalled, bringing the odd angry rant from Viola about her lack of focus. It didn't help that she couldn't cool off with regular cardio training, as the weather had taken a turn for the worse, and the facility's indoor track was still under construction. Without anything to work on, focus on, her mind was constantly adrift. _Adrift and floating towards my sister. It's almost been two months now…and I'm still having bad dreams. I still feel like shit. I can't focus right, I can't train right, I can't sleep right, and I apparently can't even relax right…I don't know what to do…_

Her focus shifted as she felt a towel drape over her shoulders. Broken out of her reverie, she glanced side to side eventually noticing the girl from before slinking away cautiously, freezing in her tracks as their eyes met. _Well, I can at least make this right, I guess. Damn it._

The girl was close enough that her blurted out whispers were audible, though Amber had to strain to fully hear her. "I'm sorry…you were shaking and…I'll go now." The girl's words were calm and apologetic, far from her nervous banter weeks ago. Amber glanced down at her arms and noticed the girl wasn't lying. She sighed to herself and shook her head_. I'm not sure if I'm shivering from the cool air, or shaking because I'm such a wreck._ She looked to where the girl was, and noticed she'd made her way halfway down the pool's length toward the change room. Amber quickly got to her feet and made after her.

They were near the entrance when she'd gotten close enough for the girl to notice. "So, I guess you're following me this time?" the girl said, stopping just shy of the doors, offering Amber a sidelong glance.

"Heh, yeah, I guess. Funny how that works out." Amber said, scratching the back of her head. "Look, I'm sorry about before. You had no way of knowing anything about me and I wasn't really in the mood for having anyone anywhere near me, so I'm sorry I blew up on you."

The girl spun around and fully faced her, a cheshire grin forming on her face. "Hmmm. Is this an official apology? Do I get to bask in the glory of it?"

Amber paused, momentarily stunned at the girl's sudden change in demeanor. "Uh, don't let it get to your head, you still came across as a jerk for not listening to me the first time." she retorted, but regretted it as the girl seemed to deflate from her words. "But…your heart was in the right place. You just wanted to help, I think. Like today. I'm not used to it. So yeah…sorry for being snappy. I'll be better about it if we ever bump into each other again."

The girl cupped her chin and thought for a moment, before extending a hand to Amber. "So…friends?" It took all of Amber's focus not to burst out in laughter at the absurdity of the question. _We've both annoyed each other…I don't think that makes us friends at all. Not that I feel kind of ready for that, anyway._

"Uh, not really sure about that, but I'm okay with you. I won't flip out on you anymore, and I hope you can forgive me for that." She said, rocking back and forth on her heels as the girl pulled back her hand confusedly.

"Only if you give me your name. I figure if we're going to be swimming near each other a lot, I may as well know yours. And I'll even give you mine, I guess. I'm Faridah!" the girl said with a smile, offering a little wave of her hand.

Amber merely shrugged. "I'm, uh… Amber." Her words elicited a restrained fist pump from Faridah, which only served to confuse Amber more_. I'm not sure what that means or why she did that but…  
_"Well, I've got to change and get home, I'm a bit tired." She said, moving past Faridah.

"Do you live nearby?" the older girl asked, following her into the changing room.

"I…" Amber started, before thinking about what she should say. _This girl's just a regular person. I don't know if I should tell her, if that would be safe. I mean, outside of my visits to the pool and library, I'm pretty much always supervised. If things go sour, I don't think it would be good to put her in harm's way…_

"You…" Faridah said, her voice trailing off in light mockery.

"I really shouldn't give that stuff away to just anyone, you know? Sorry." She said, moving to her locker and grabbing a fresh towel and change of clothes.

"Um…it's alright. Sometimes my small talk tends to turn into prying information from people." The older girl said from across the room, getting her own supplies.

Both girls approached the showers at the same time, Faridah comically gesturing for Amber to enter first. She didn't really understand the older girl's action, but due to the grin plastered on her face, figured it was made in jest. Amber started the shower and felt the warm water soothe her body. _I don't think I'll ever get used to warm water. It's pretty fantastic stuff. Only got lukewarm stuff at any of the orphanages I was at. This…this is just nice._

"Do you not use any shampoo or conditioner?" she heard called out from behind her, after having spent some time washing herself. Amber turned her head and gave Faridah a confused shrug_. Sounds familiar, but…I can't remember what that is_. The girl moved out of her stall and handed her two smallish bottles. "Here, you can use some of mine. You have more hair than me, you'll need it."

Amber took the bottles, but continued to stare at the older girl in front of her. We're _really different. I mean, at least, our bodies…_ she thought, before gazing down at her own body. _Am I supposed to look more like her? Is it bad that I don't? I mean, I've gotten some strange looks in the past, and even recently. Maybe…_

"Hey, how'd you get that…" Faridah started, rubbing her fingers along her cheek to her jaw. Amber raised her left eyebrow quizzically in response. "…you, know. The scar?"

_Oh._ Amber reached out and grazed it with her fingers. It had healed and left a scar, but the area was still very sensitive, especially where it met the jaw. Her thoughts started shifting to that night, hearing Melody's screams. She tried to shake the memory from her head as she spoke. "I got in a fight."

The last word piqued Faridah's interest, as her face lit up with curiosity. "Did you win?" Her gaze was piercing, the girl's incredibly dark brown eyes boring into her soul to extract an answer. Amber held the gaze, feeling a little like she'd get tackled if she looked away.

"It…depends on who you ask I guess. It wasn't a fun night…" she said, her voice trailing as she recalled the night clearly. _It wasn't fun, but it was wonderful. Painful. Scary. Relieving. And there was great food too. But mostly wonderful…_

"That smile on your face tells me otherwise, but I won't press." Faridah noted nervously, backing away toward her own stall. Amber's brow furrowed as she wondered what would send her inquisitive acquaintance away in such a manner. It clicked in a few seconds later as she was experimenting with the shampoo.

"I didn't kill anyone that night, if that's what you're thinking. I'm like, not even fifteen yet." Amber called out, letting the water rinse the substance from her hair. The older girl turned around are stared at her for a few moments.

"You know, if you wouldn't have mentioned 'that night' in what you just said, I probably would be more at ease. Just saying." The girl joked, though there were traces across her face showing her concern as her eyes wandered across her body, looking for other old wounds.

Amber finished a quick rinse of conditioner and stepped out of her stall. "Well, you're the one who asked about the scar. Anyway, it's not like I have a hit-list or anything. People tend to come and fight me instead of the other way around." _Though I can make an exception for one person in particular, perhaps. I mean, that IS why I'm doing this. Does that make me a bad person?_

"Well, I suppose I'll try not to sleepwalk into you or anything, then." Faridah said, giggling. Amber shrugged and began toweling herself off. "You know, you're a bit odd."

Amber turned to face the older girl and tilted her head to the side in confusion. _I'm odd? How?_ "Why do you think that?" she asked, feeling somewhat anxious for a reason she couldn't quite put her finger on.

"Most girls use the curtains in the stall when they shower, and have a towel to wear when they leave. Most girls cover up, but you…kind of just do whatever. Like you don't care. It's a little weird." Amber was slightly taken aback by the revelation, but it wasn't a huge surprise. _Kind of like when I went swimming naked in the Ottawa River that one time and people kept trying to cover me up with towels or blankets or whatever when I got out._

"Does it matter? Everyone has a body, it's not exactly a secret. Besides, you didn't cover up either." Amber retorted, feeling a little flustered.

Faridah gave a light laugh and lightly slapped Amber on the shoulder. "I kind of just mirrored you for a bit. Felt kind of strange, but I also kind of felt a little free, I guess. Still, if there were more than just the two of us in here I would have pulled the curtain for sure."

"Oh. I guess if I'm supposed to…" she started, before being interrupted by Faridah unfastening the towel around her, which unceremoniously dropped to the tiled floor. She gave the older girl an annoyed look before bending down to pick it up and put it back on again.

"Huh, see, if any other girl had that done to them, they'd probably scream and or try to cover themselves with their hands unsuccessfully, or they'd be really angry. Did you have nudist parents or something?" Farida asked, her amusement plain across her face. Amber quickly made a beeline away from the girl to her locker and changed, not feeling amused in the least.

Faridah had slowly floated over to her own locker, but kept glancing over at her as she changed. Amber briskly made her way toward the doors, stopping and turning towards her acquaintance briefly as she reached them. "'Night, Faridah."

Her walk home was quick, and she could barely concentrate on the snow gusting across her face. Faridah's words haunted her in a way she hadn't felt before. It was only when she slumped down into her bed that she realized she was home, but that offered little solace. _Where do I fit in? Can I even live in the same world as everyone else? What the hell am I supposed to do?_

She sat up and tossed her outerwear off, then quickly brushed the remains of snow from her sheets. They were still cold and wet when she laid back down, but that wouldn't be what would keep her awake most of the night.

* * *

_Preface: Some rather intense violence is alluded to here. Figured I wouldn't let you walk in blind._

* * *

Viola sat in her office above the training room, taking her dinner break and mulling over the week's training statistics. Amber's progress, or lack thereof, didn't paint a rosy picture, and in turn eliminated her appetite. Fiske had arrived hours earlier with a small entourage and some equipment containers, so she knew her time for patience was nearing its end. _In truth, I suppose I haven't been very patient with the girl, not since that night. She's trying to succeed, she's trying so hard…yet I keep lambasting her with assertions that she's holding back or forgetting my training. I haven't been helping lately…I hope I haven't truly failed her._

Her terminal flashed yet again, reminding her of the unread message in her inbox. Her finger hovered over the icon, but remained a safe distance away. _I know my hesitation is from my fear of losing control over this, and it's simply my need to be ignorant about what will follow…I don't know what they plan on doing. Perhaps it's better that way. Should I just leave for the rest of the night and see what I've wrought tomorrow? Allow myself one last peaceful sleep?_

Viola stood up and paced over to the window and looked down toward the main level, where her subject sat, appearing bored. _Or do I take responsibility and control of at least knowing what will happen next? Of owning this burden and preparing her for the trial ahead of her?_ Viola gazed back at the terminal. _If this had involved Faridah, would I have hesitated so long? Would I have protected her more thoroughly?_

In a way, Viola felt fortunate that her sister's child had been one of the few who had made it through life without any complications from the eezo exposure, and who wouldn't manifest biotic ability. _It's as much a gift as it is a curse right now. That child down there wouldn't be in this mess had she not been exposed initially, or exposed the second time. She would likely be off with whatever family would have adopted her, rather than being held in the custody of the Alliance's program. She would have had a more regular life…have I condemned her? _Viola shook her head, trying to dispel her negativity. _No, I must not think like that. I will see her thrive with my help, even…even if she hates me for it._

She slowly made her way to the terminal and opened the message. The message was short, concise, much like Fiske's others. However, he hadn't been so directly arrogant before, never had he actively undermined her operation before. _He wants me to go home after dinner while he takes care of business? No…no, no, no._

Viola stormed down to the main level and into the storage area, her glare prompting one of Fiske's men to point her toward a smaller admin room. Within seconds she'd burst into the office, slammed the door, and was mere millimeters from her instigator's face.

"You have the gall to try and take over my operation without discussing it with me personally? That is not acceptable, Fiske." She said sternly, her voice low and her eyes flashing with barely-concealed rage.

"And here I thought you would be pleased, Miss Guzman. For the time being we will take control of the girl's training until she can willingly access her biotics. Afterward, she would be handed back to you. The blood would be on our hands, Miss Guzman. All you need to do is make the decision to go home." Fiske's voice was quiet and calm as he stared off toward one of the steel chests across the room.

"There is nothing pleasing about you taking full control of my subject, even if temporary. This is not simply a decision to go home, Fiske, I am not so naïve as to think that. I am part of the decision, what happens to her under your care will be my responsibility." She said, leaning toward his face so he couldn't ignore her. He in turn waved her off.

"Whether you are naïve is certainly not impossible, Miss Guzman. Tell me, what do you believe we plan on doing in order to help your subject advance in her training? We provide you funding so that we can study the effects of second exposure on biotic abilities. That is our primary reason for being here, regardless of your own. We take our commitments seriously, Miss Guzman. So tell me, what are we willing to do?" Fiske asked, sauntering over to the chest he'd had his eyes on and opening the locking mechanism.

Viola stood and watched as the case opened up, but Fiske's form obscured any details. _What would they do? I fear I do not have a distinct answer yet. Certainly not utilizing electric shock, but… _"I would imagine that you would do what you feel is necessary, without putting her life in danger, or her health at risk."

Fiske turned around, holding a large black bag, weighed down slightly by its contents. "Such is the dilemma, Miss Guzman. We have but one subject, so we must take care not to squander our investment. She must continue to train, so the means must not be so drastic as to require a significant amount of healing. Broken bones, torn ligaments…these would delay our research, cost us resources and progress. We must adhere to what we know of how she accesses her abilities, keep the damage minimal, but ensure that it is efficient. Thus, our options are limited, Miss Guzman." He handed her the bag and clasped his hands behind his back. Viola opened it to get a look at what they'd be using; the sight of the tool at first confusing her before she dropped it in shock.

"This…this is barbaric!" she yelled, shaking her head in disbelief. "You expect me to approve of this medieval instrument?!"

"I expect you to advance humanity, Miss Guzman." Fiske fixed her with a stony gaze. "The methods I am using will not cause irreversible physical harm. It will not cause death. Do not forget your part in all of this. The girl is only here because you did not make efforts to help her friend. That was your plan, no? Have you not been barbaric yourself in the past, to help advance humanity? Do not accuse me as if I am the only one dealing pain and suffering Miss Guzman. You know that to be far from the truth."

"I do not make it my agenda to hurt children, Fiske." Viola snapped, retaliating at Fiske's assertions. _Well, he's correct…I have been a monster in the past. This girl does not deserve such treatment again._

"You had every opportunity to help the small redhead. Your implant in her provided you all the readings for you to know what was happening, what would happen. You did nothing, knowing that it would make the girl vulnerable, bring her to us. You allowed the child to get hurt by the Reds in order to gauge her reaction. You are as guilty as I am for having such an agenda." He said, moving over to pick the bag up. "I will not stray from this path, Miss Guzman. It is the only way to proceed. This is more important, and on a grander scale than a simple, unwanted orphan girl. You came to us wanting to advance humanity. I have no requirement that you comply, I merely feel the girl responds better with you around. Your research is also important in retaining subjects after continual exposure. You are not, however, irreplaceable. Do not say something you will regret, Miss Guzman."

Viola stood still for a few moments before lowering her head in defeat. "Just allow me a few moments with the girl before you begin. I will not take long." She did not wait for his reply, hastily exiting the room and moving to a nearby linen closet. She scanned through the contents and a small dish towel, and then made her way out to the training floor. The Cerberus workers were already setting up the steel frame they'd brought, Amber gazing at it nonchalantly as she swirled her glass of orange juice. Viola knelt down in front of her so she could be at eye level with the girl, and offered her the cloth.

Amber frowned at the cloth and looked at Viola as if she had two heads. "What's this for? Do I look like I'm making a mess?"

Viola ignored her remark and maintained eye contact. "Have you eaten much recently?" Her voice couldn't hide her urgency, and Amber picked up on it, leaning back slightly in caution.

"No…haven't really been hungry today." She answered, wondering why Viola of all people was getting in her personal space.

"Good, good." Viola mumbled to herself, trying to hide her relief. "Child, I feel like I have failed in preparing you, in adjusting to you. You…must be aware that there's been little progress as of late."

"Yeah, you made that pretty clear all those times you yelled at me. Thanks for that, by the way." Amber said, rolling her eyes and planting her focus back on the construction in the centre of the room.

"I fear I was lacking in focus myself, and in my frustration I took it out on you. Unfortunately, no matter what happened in the past, the fact is that I will not be directly supervising you for the foreseeable future. Not until you are capable of accessing your biotic abilities willingly. I am sorry." Viola concentrated on each word so as not to stammer or stumble on her speech. _This is the child that will be hurt because of my actions. She is my responsibility._

"I'm not gonna shed any tears over getting a new teacher, if that's what you're getting to." Amber muttered, shooting Viola a cool glare.

"Child…" Viola started, before being interrupted by the dish towel being flung onto her face.

"If you're going to give me some weird personal talk, you should at least use my name." Amber made no effort to hide her frustration. "At least give me that, if you're going to hand me off."

"Amber. If there is anything I must tell you, it's that I am responsible for you. Whatever happens, I am responsible. Even if I am not visible, I am no less deserving of blame. You will likely hate me after this is over, but please trust in what I have taught you. Focus on my teachings if you can, it will help you advance more quickly than otherwise. It alone will help you pass through this next trial." Viola pleaded, her words increasingly uneven as she went on.

Amber nodded slowly, visibly concerned about what Viola was alluding to. "What's the towel for?" she asked softly, taking it back from Viola and moving it around in her hands.

Viola knelt silenty, thinking what words would be most efficient, but found no answers. _Honesty it is, then…_she thought. "So you don't bite your tongue off. Bite into it before they start, it should help a little."

Amber slowly stood up, orange juice still in hand. "Why would I want to bite my tongue off? What's happening?" she asked, her voice growing in volume. "What's going to happen to me, Viola?"

Viola merely stood and slunk away, feeling entirely defeated. "I'm so sorry, Amber." Her words were whispers, but still echoed in the expanse of the cold training room. She heard the footsteps of the Cerberus guards approach the girl behind her as she walked away. The ensuing struggle from the small dining area to the large steel beams she'd be tied to was rather audible as she proceeded towards the doors. Viola walked into the storage area and sat on a crate, unable to watch what would be done, but unwilling to live in ignorance of it. _This will be a reminder of what happens when I fail, of what's at stake._

She heard the chains being lead through the beams, heard the profanity from Amber's mouth as her arms were strapped tight. She heard the firm voice of Fiske informing Amber of what to do, half drowned out by the girl's panicked objections.

She heard the first crack of the whip and the bone-chilling cry that followed it. The strained sobs afterward tore through her heart as she imagined the first time Faridah fell off her bike, and when her niece would come home crying from being bullied. She imagined the time her little sister broke her arm while sledding, and when Kate learned her cancer was terminal.

She heard another crack of the whip minutes later that dragged her out of her memories, and the anguished cries that pulled her back in. She heard it all, she imagined what she could, but it seemed wrong to her.  
_I want to feel it. I deserve that much at least._

* * *

Amber knew she was walking; where, she wasn't too sure. _I've been to my room, I think…or maybe it was the doctor's…my body's all numb and fuzzy_. She thought, giggling to herself as she clumsily made her way down a hall. She glanced down and noticed she was barefoot, but her feet didn't feel cold against the stony tiled floor. By the time she raised her head, she realized she was walking straight into the side of a doorway; Amber attempted to pivot but it only sent her stumbling into the hard metal doorframe, eliciting a laugh from her as she slowly slid down onto the floor.

She took time to get her bearings and her feet under her before pausing in the doorway. _I've been to my room, I think…or was it the doctor's? I can't remember…my body's all numb and weird feeling…_ She thought, giggling to herself as she gracelessly made her way through the door and out into the cool caress of winter.

It was dark outside, the snow billowing around her lithe form as her uncoordinated legs led her along the path away from the facility. Amber rubbed her bare arms and nearly lost balance, teetering close to a snowbank_. It's kind of cold out, maybe I should find a blanket. Or go home. Mel's probably worried. I feel weird…_ she mused to herself as she slipped on a patch of ice, falling onto her back. A gasp of pain erupted from her but it was soon forgotten when she opened her eyes.

_Oh my god, I'm in space!_ The snow cascaded down at her, the bright yellow light of the lamp post illuminating her field of view slightly. _Wasn't I just at the doctor's though? Or…was it my room? But…_

Tears filled her eyes and slowly traveled down the sides of her face, her hand covering her mouth in shock. _I'm here without Mel! We were supposed to go together…No!_

"Mel!" Amber yelled, slurring the word more than she'd have liked as her body began to tire on her. "Mel."

Words soon escaped Amber as her body fell to the clutches of sleep, resting silently in the unforgiving embrace of the stormy December night.

* * *

**A/N: Welp, another chapter down! Not a heck of a lot left…which is weird, but there will be considerable time-skips in the future. They will make sense, certainly. In the meantime, at least one more chapter in the current time period. Might be a short one. I'm not sure. Depends on how I feel.**

**Anyway, I hope the chapter wasn't too off-putting. This was something I was not looking forward to writing, but I felt was somewhat necessary. I tried to make it as tasteful and vague as I could, but I mean…it's quite easy to imagine what happened. Sorry for that. For what it's worth, it's probably the last big bad thing to happen to her in the story, so it's kind of uphill from here, in a way.**

**So yeah, thank you everyone for reading, and sending me all those lovely reviews and PMs and everything. I'm going to try and be more productive this week, I want to get two chapters out before I go away for my annual vacation next Friday. Hopefully I can do it! Anywho, love you all, thanks for reading, and have a wonderful weekend!**


	15. Chapter 15

December was never Amber's favourite month; the winds were always a little too cold too quickly, and there was always a little too much snow. Even this year, with winter coming earlier than normal, it still seemed a bit overwhelming. It certainly didn't help that she had no idea where she was.

She didn't know how much longer she could walk before she froze to death. The storm was erupting around her, the snowflakes cold and hard against her bare skin, and everything was a shade of white. She trudged on aimlessly, her feet crunching against the snow beneath her as layers built up on her brown curls. Each breath shuddered out of her as her body attempted to shiver warmth into itself where there was none to be gained. As her steps slowed, the song of a sparrow echoed through the storm, propelling her forward. Its song was strangely familiar, massaging her troubled mind and making the winds and the snow less important.

Feelingly slightly invigorated, the depths of winter seemed to be getting further away, a pale yellow light erupting above, bringing a light wash of colour into the world. The storm had weakened enough for a tree to be visible in the distance, atop a slight slope. As she ascended, her legs paused_. I've been here before, I swear…_she thought to herself, taking a look around. The snow was now lightly falling, allowing a wide view of her surroundings. She tilted her head in confusion and slumped down into the snow._ The meadow? From my dream, but I'm…_

"You must be really cold, Birdie."

Amber froze for a moment as the words echoed through her mind. It was a familiar voice; one she yearned to hear, but one she thought was lost to her for all of time. She was scared to turn around in case it was some cruel joke, some apparition that would vanish soon after into the snow. All rational thought informed her not to take heed of it, but above all else she was still human, still ruled by instinct. Her heartbeat reverberated between her ears as she slowly pivoted and nearly melted at the sight before her.

"Mel…" she choked out, her body still stiff and raw from the harsh weather. The redhead quickly scampered over to her and wrapped her in a blanket, leading her up the hill and behind the tree to a small campfire. Amber hadn't smelled the smoke or heard the crackling of the embers before, but it was a pleasant surprise. Melody sat her as close to the warmth of the fire as she dared, and snuggled up next to her. The mere sensation of her sister leaning up against sent her heart soaring as tears of relief streamed down her frostbitten cheeks.

"You know, for a girl that's been really resourceful, I'm really wondering why you're naked, Amber. I mean, it was cold in September, I thought you'd at least be wearing some boots and a sweater." Melody said worriedly, squeezing her sister closer. "I mean, just because I can't tell you that you're being silly, doesn't mean you shouldn't think so yourself, because I worry, and I told you that you'd get through this winter, but you're not making it easy on me you know."

Amber lowered her head and stared at the dancing flames. "I…don't even know how I got here. Or why I'm…you know. Last thing I remember is walking around and feeling like I was freezing my toes off. You know I'm normally smarter than this, Mel. I…I'm just really happy I'm here with you."

Her sister shrugged and started brushing the snow off Amber's head. "I know. I just…jeez, you've been worrying me lately. I don't want you to hurt because you want to get revenge for me, Birdie. I want you to be happy. With, you know, your life."

Amber reached out and gently wiped snow off her sister's cheek and nose, her breath catching at the touch. It was just as she remembered, but remained a confusing relief. _I'll…I'll take what I can get._

"I missed you so much, Mel." She whispered, staring into her sister's brilliant green pools. "I miss you every day. I feel so alone without you, and I don't know what to do anymore."

Melody gave her a warm smile and nuzzled up against her, bringing back memories of how content she would feel each night in the orphanage, at their home in that musty, deserted basement. She bit her lip, trying to recall the last time she felt this happy.

"Amber, please, I'm always with you. Never, ever forget that. This…" her sister said softly, taking hold of the acorn necklace around Amber's neck. "I'm here. In that sapling getting ready to grow outside of where you live…I'm there. But most importantly, I'm here." She finished her hand against Amber's heart.

Amber felt a tear run down her cheek as her nose dripped slightly. "I know, Mel, it's just hard sometimes. You know, it's strange the things I find myself missing the most. How warm you were at night in the winter, your big toothy grin when you knew I needed cheering up or a good laugh. I miss talking to you about anything…I don't know. I'm just a mess." She said, shaking her head. _Mel wanted me to focus on myself after she left, and I haven't done that at all. Everything I've done has been empty or because I … she's right._

"Amber, believe it or not, we didn't know each other all that long. I might not be around physically, at least in how you'd like me to be, but…you can make new friends. I know you can. You just need to give other people a shot." Melody said feeling around inside the blanket and gripping one of Amber's hands.

"But how? You saw how people were when we lived on the streets, Mel. How different they are, I don't even know how they live, how they think." Amber ranted, her other hand settling over Melody's. "I just feel like there's this life out there and I'm not part of it, I'm too late to join…if I even want to."

"Just be patient, you goof. Yeah, you're different, but that's not a bad thing. So what if they do things differently, if they're good people and are good to you, that's all that matters. People don't need to be the same to get along. I mean, come on, look at us." Mel said, offering Amber a mock frown.

"Yeah, but at least we grew up in the same way." She replied, her voice hinting at her frustration.

"So people might not understand real well how we think or whatever. You're a good person, Birdie. People will be able to see that if you let them, if you believe it. This is your life, figure out what you want to do with it, and let others help you get there." The redhead gave her sister a light squeeze before grabbing some firewood and adding it to the campfire.

Amber shook her head a little and laughed. "Since when did you get all wise, Mel?" Her sister looked back to her and gave an exaggerated shrug, before plopping back down beside her.

"I dunno, probably because I'm really awesome." She gushed, before her trademark grin shrunk to a knowing smile. "I just…remember what I told you a while ago? The thing I wanted most from you?" she said softly, shyly looking up to her older sister.

Amber thought back to that night and the pain she felt. Her heart ached at the mere mention of it, but she made the effort to sift through those memories. "You wanted me to love myself." She said, her words barely a whisper, her eyes darting back to the fire.

"Yeah. It doesn't matter what other people think or say. You're my sister, you can do anything. I know what you're doing is tough on you, I can feel that, but believe in yourself. Love yourself, because I love you."

A strong gust of wind burst through the camp and blew the fire out, bringing the chill back. Amber looked over to Melody, who had gotten up and was standing a few feet away.

"Mel?" Amber asked, confused at why her sister had moved away.

"You have to go now." She said, a sad smile creeping across her face. "Just remember, please."

Amber struggled to get up, her body feeling colder by the second, her muscles stiff and unresponsive. "Mel, please, let me come with you!" Her voice was frantic as she stumbled backward into the thin blanket of snow.

"I'm always with you." Melody whispered softly in her ear, before slowly disappearing into the snowstorm. Amber closed her eyes in attempt to keep her tears at bay, and silence took her.

* * *

"I love you." She whispered, her voice quaking as she shivered in her blanket. The storm was audible in the distance, muffled, but it remained present in some form. As she opened her eyes, she started at the realization that she wasn't outside anymore. _What the…?_

Despite the difficulty of getting a good look at her surroundings due to the immense amount of blankets all over and around her, she could tell she was on a bed, in someone's room. _Not my room, though…_

The darkness of the room made it hard to make out the details, but she could tell that the walls were riddled with colourful posters of people, places, art and a variety of things she didn't understand. In some areas, there were small, round cutouts in the wall, and near the bed was a holo terminal that wasn't on at the time. A few data pads seemed strewn across the floor and there were bits of half-destroyed or half built machinery lying around in one corner of the room. _Seems well lived in, I guess. But where am I?_

Amber tried to sit forward, but felt an intense pain in her back that broke the levee of her misery. _First, Mel's gone, and now I can't get warm and my back really hurts. I don't know if today can get any worse._ She complained to herself, slumping back down slowly and wincing at the contact. _Fuck…_

A few minutes later, she could hear some muffled bickering from outside the room, one of the patrons sounding angrier than the other. Moments later, it passed, and soon after the door inched open. A figure entered and lingered near the door, but Amber couldn't tell who it was for the tears caught in her eyes. She couldn't will herself to care enough about why she was in that strange place; she just wanted to be alone for a while.

"Are you awake?" the figure whispered from the door. Amber pulled the blankets tighter and covered herself with them entirely as best as she could.

"Go away." She muttered turning her head toward a dislodged pillow near the side of the bed. She heard footsteps approaching her and an area of the bed give way as whomever it was sat on it.

"Well that's no way to thank me for my hospitality." The person said softly in a mocking tone, before pausing and placing a hand on Amber's blanketed leg. "I'm sorry, that was mean of me. Are you feeling alright, are you…are you in pain?" The voice was familiar, but she couldn't put a name to it. _Don't really care to, I just want her to leave me alone, but..._

She remembered what her sister had told her in her dream, and bit down on her lip. _Let them see the good in me, huh? Let other people help me? If I bungle this up, Mel, I'm blaming it on you…_

"Sorry. Thanks for…whatever you helped me with." Amber started, attempting to pull away some covers without aggravating her sensitive back. "My back hurts, and I'm freezing, and I'm kind of hazy on what happened."

The person leaned slightly toward her and slightly gripped her leg. "Well it's hurt you enough that you're crying so, I think…"

"I just had a bad dream, really." Amber interrupted, and immediately wondered why she would reveal that. _Honestly, what's going on with me today? Can it get any worse? Ugh…_ "So long as I stay still, my back doesn't hurt that bad. I'm not in that much pain, I'm pretty okay with not moving. Uh…thanks again for the blankets." She managed to lift a hand high enough to wipe her tears away and get a better look at the person sitting near her. _Faridah?_

"Oh…well, it might not have been a dream…" the raven haired girl started.

"No, it definitely was." She whispered tearfully. _God, I wish it was real. If she were still here…_

"Care to talk about it?" Faridah asked softly. Amber shook her head.

"It was…really personal. Maybe some other time." Amber conceded, her mind locked on her sister._ I'll give her a shot, Mel. If you think it'll help, I'll do it._

"Does this mean we're friends?" the taller girl nearly gasped, covering her mouth in shock. Amber laughed softly at the girl's excitement.

"Well, my back is probably mangled, and I'm freezing cold while covered in blankets…and I'm in a strange room I've never been in, so there's a good chance you might have saved my life somewhere. I think you're owed some form of trust and friendship." Amber stated, trying to angle herself better so that she could see her visitor better, gritting her teeth as tendrils of pain tore through her body.

Faridah seemed to sense Amber's discomfort and scooted closer to her, gently maneuvering some pillows to prop her up. "I found you on the path outside the pool. You…you were so cold. You weren't wearing shoes… you were barely wearing anything, and it was snowing really hard. I almost tripped over you before I saw you just laying there…it was kind of scary. And then…I wanted to call the hospital, but my aunt thought you'd be fine here… I argued with her. I still think you should go to a hospital. You're really hurt…"

Amber could see the girl was troubled. _Hell, that doesn't sound like me at all…what happened?_

"Well, thanks to you, I'm fine." Amber said, hoping to soothe her visitor's worries a little. The girl shook her head angrily.

"No, you're not fine, and that's why you're here." Faridah grimaced, choking on her words. "You were hurt really bad."

Amber tried to sit up again and felt the pain tear through her again. It felt more familiar now, and her mind strained to recall why. There was a big hazy blank for most of what was probably the past twenty four hours. _I remember the pain, and…the doctor's office? And my room, I think, but, didn't I sleep?_

"I don't remember a lot of details right now. I…I kind of train at this place, and…" she started, trying to gather her thoughts as best as she could.

"Do they have you fight bears or lions or something?" the taller girl asked, her stony seriousness causing Amber to fall into a fit of laughter. She wiped away a few tears from the absurdity of the question and from the pain erupting in her back.

"No, I wasn't fighting animals, I…" Amber said, her voice trailing off as the fog started lifting on her memories. She paused and kept digging away mentally. _I remember the pain…the sound of chains. I…was held in place and… _Her memory quickly jumped to the cracking sound, and her back ached in turn from the thought reverberating in her mind.

"Amber?" Faridah asked, her lower lip trembling at the sight of the blanketed girl's face twisting in shock, gazing off to some blank corner of the room. She leaned forward and pulled Amber's focus back toward her. Her chin was cool to the touch.

"I was whipped." Her words were almost indistinguishable from breaths; Faridah's close proximity allowed her to catch enough of it, causing her to recoil back in shock. _It's not bears, but…fuck!_ One part of her wanted to escape the room and confront her mother with all the fury she could muster, but the other part saw the vulnerable figure in front of her and felt the need to comfort her. In the end, she awkwardly sat up at the side of the bed and stared out the window beside the bed. Even her poorly-timed wit and sarcasm was offline.

"What a way to spend Christmas." She eventually mumbled, shaking her head._ I'm such an idiot, what does that have to do with anything? Think, Faridah!_

The words brought Amber back into reality, away from replaying the horrors from the training room. _Christmas…wasn't that some day in December? I think I celebrated that when I was at St. Paul's, and …god, whatever church orphanage I was at afterward. Can't even remember the name anymore…_

"I don't really celebrate it. Haven't since I was really young." She deadpanned, using her knee to nudge the taller girl slightly. She was starting to feel a bit warmer, giving her some control over her stiff limbs. "But like I said, I'm alive. It's not the worst case scenario."

Faridah turned to her and grinned. "And you made a new friend!" Amber rolled her eyes and laughed lightly.

"Yeah, I guess there's that too." She said, offering the girl a kind smile. "Even though I don't really know much about you."

"Hah, well, for one, you're resting in my room." The raven haired girl noted. "Though I will say that I thought sharing my bed for the first time would be more exciting." She couldn't contain her laughter after that final statement, which confused Amber, but she decided not to think much of it. _I slept in the same bed with Mel for a long time. I don't see the point for excitement when you're trying to sleep. Maybe I'm different in that way too…but I like sleep, so…whatever._

"And apparently you like wrecked machines or something." Amber added, still a bit curious about the mess over in the corner. Faridah tilted her head and scratched at her neck a little before spinning around and looking at the pile of parts behind her.

"Oh! Yeah, I'm taking a streamlined mechanical engineering course at school. I love taking things apart to see how they work!" she said, her body vibrating with excitement.

"Yeah, I kind of got that by how many questions you seem to ask." Amber noted, smiling. "How old are you anyway?"

"Ooh, I was going to ask you that next. Curses!" she shook her fist in mock anger. "I just turned fifteen in September. You?"

"Turning fifteen in April." Amber said distractedly, thinking back to her last birthday. _I can't believe it hasn't even been a year since the orphanage was wrecked…since Mel gave me those drawings…_

"I would have thought you were younger, really, but…" Faridah started, pausing as she noticed Amber was a bit more downcast than before. "Maybe we should get some food in you. It's probably almost dinner time, so maybe you could take some painkillers and…I'm sure Aunt Viola won't mind…"

Her tormenter's name caused her to recoil slightly, cursing to herself about the pain in her back. _What the shit? I'm…what?! I'm in Viola's house? Faridah…well she looks kind of like Viola, I guess, but her skin's lighter and her eyes are all different, and so is her nose, and her hair's short…wow. What the hell do I do? This…this changes everything… _Her thoughts raced around in her mind, trying to make sense of her situation, and what the best course of action would be. _Fuck, this changes everything!_

"You know her, don't you?" All traces of humour were gone from the raven-haired girl's face. Amber wasn't sure what to say yet, so she merely nodded. Faridah stood up off the bed and briskly moved to the door. "I'll be right back with some meds. Then I'll see if we can't get you something to eat." She finished, a strained smile crossing her face before she slipped out of the room.

Amber leaned back onto the pillows and exhaled a breath she hadn't been aware she was holding. _I shouldn't keep jinxing myself. Today DOES keep getting worse, despite all odds. Fuck._

* * *

It had taken nearly an hour for the painkillers to kick in enough to get Amber out of bed and into some new clothes. She could have used a shower, but none were going to risk it, worrying it could aggravate her injuries. Faridah had sat Amber on a chair at the dining table, an extra cushion behind her forcing her to sit slightly closer to the lip of the seat; since then she could hear her and presumably Viola preparing food and squabbling with each other..

Amber just sat there, mentally drowning out the noise, clutching her necklace. _Mel, I don't know what to do here…this isn't what I expected at all, and…she's the one that let me get beaten really badly. Mel, I want her to hurt. She helped take your life, and she nearly took mine. I…I want her to hurt but…can I really do that with Faridah related to her? Can I tear apart her family just because she tore us apart? That…that doesn't seem right. Maybe fair, but…I don't know. I know you don't want me to want revenge, but I just feel so angry sometimes…I don't know what to do about it. I can't keep trusting Viola when she keeps hurting me like this, but Faridah's been kind to me. Maybe…for her sake…_

"Amber? Are you okay?" Faridah was beside her, and had placed a hand on her shoulder. The girl's gaze was focused solely on Amber's white-knuckled grip. Reflexively, she let go of her necklace and rubbed the back of her neck.

"Oh, uh…sorry. I must have been lost in thought." Amber said, smiling sheepishly at her. Faridah kept her focus on the necklace.

"I don't think I've seen you without it before. Even when you'd get out of the pool, it'd be tucked in your bodysuit. It's kind of weird, though. An acorn?" Faridah thought aloud, looking back up to Amber for a response.

She thought that her mind would tense up, that she's retreat into herself at the statement, but she found herself exceedingly calm. _Probably the painkillers, but maybe I'm just tired of keeping her to myself. I don't know…_she thought, giving a contented sigh. "It was my sister's. It's kind of funny, she got it on my birthday when I was stuck in the hospital. She was so excited about it…she'd never had a necklace before, and the nurse was nice enough to buy it for her. She…she could make any situation happier just by being there."

"Where's your sister now?" Faridah asked, before covering her mouth a second or two later, realizing her mistake. Amber shook her head lightly.

"It's okay." Amber said, pausing, trying to find the words to say. Viola's entrance with platters of food strangely made it easier, letting her focus on who she saw as the culprit. Her eyes trailed after Viola as she went to and from the kitchen. "She died about two months ago. We got exposed to eezo around my birthday and…God decided take her instead of me. I didn't deserve her, anyway, but she made me better. She still does."

Faridah shifted her chair closer, moving her hand from Amber's shoulder to her knee. "I'm sorry…I can't imagine losing a sister. Your parents must have been distraught."

"Never had any parents. We had each other, though, at least for a little while. I…guess that's why I was kind of mean to you at the pool before. I just miss her." Amber noted solemnly, her gaze still locked on Viola, who seemed to have shrunk since noticing. _If this is all the revenge I can get for now, making you uncomfortable, making you feel guilty like you should, then that's what it'll have to be. Even if I have to let go of some privacy. She'll get the truth from me before you, you heartless witch._

"No parents? Did you live on the street, then? That's crazy!" Faridah muttered, reaching out for a dinner roll, but thinking twice about it.

"Only since the hospital stay. Was in orphanages before, until a shuttle crashed into it and blew it up. Living on the street wasn't too bad, even if people were usually jerks. We didn't eat much, but we had something every day. We probably could have eaten more if we weren't saving to move to a colony." She sighed softly at the memories of her and Melody discussing where they'd move to, and what they'd do there.

"If you were saving for it, why didn't you go to a colony?" Viola asked, finally saying something as she lowered the last platter to the table and sat down across from the two girls. Amber refused to break eye contact.

"Because it would be wrong to go there without her, and I'm not ready to leave. I don't know what to do with my life yet, so I stayed here." Amber's voice was icy for the first time that day, leaving her plate empty as the other two slowly started adding food.

"Will you be resuming your training once you heal?" Viola asked nonchalantly, moving some turkey breast onto her plate.

"Viola! I don't think she volunteered to be whipped! Of course she's not going back." Faridah slammed her fork to the table, fury emanating from her posture. Amber covered Faridah's closest hand with hers, hoping to calm her_. She's not going to like my answer, either way._

"I'll go back to training…" Amber started, eliciting a gasp from Faridah. She offered the girl a sad smile, and lightly clutched her hand before continuing. "…but Faridah's right. I didn't volunteer to get whipped for a few meals a day and a roof over my head. I could afford to eat all winter long with my savings. I'm going to need a bit more if you want me to continue. I was nice and didn't ask for much when I came in. Just a spot for my sister to be buried…that was it. That's not enough, anymore."

"But your back… you can't let them do that to you again!" The girl looked at Amber in disbelief, and then turned to her aunt. "There's no reason!"

"Viola…has been teaching me to get in touch with my…biotic ability. It wasn't going well because…well, she probably knows more about that than I do. She handed me off to another instructor. Still, the training…torture, really…I almost tapped in once, but then the pain got to be too much and I couldn't focus anymore. I'm close. It won't take much longer." She could tell Faridah couldn't understand, by her baffled expression. Amber finally shifted her gaze from Viola, looking directly at the girl beside her instead. "I need to make the most of this. Please, trust me?"

Faridah stared at her for a few seconds before nodding and angrily forking a piece of carrot. Viola just looked at her plate as she ate, apparently nonplussed about the discussion. Amber, in turn, didn't really know what else to say to break the awkwardness, so she began gathering food for her plate. _I don't want to…I don't even know how to handle this. What the hell am I doing? I don't want them to hate each other._

"Viola, I'm going to need a ride to the library tomorrow. It's important." Amber announced, finishing adding to her plate as she plopped a large mound of mashed potatoes onto it. Viola looked up at her, slightly confused.

"It is on your schedule, true, but you should rest. You may go another day." Viola noted, dismissively. Amber took a bite of the turkey and savored the taste for a moment before responding.

"I figure I deserve a little break tomorrow. Besides, I'll just be practicing the piano and doing some light reading, I'm not doing anything too crazy." Amber said, her tone insistent. _Can't let Joel send that letter. Not yet, at least. Maybe when I can control my biotics enough… _

"You play music?" Faridah asked, more than a tinge of surprise and happiness in her tone. Amber looked over at the wide-eyed girl.

"Uh, I don't really play yet. I'm just starting, but it's fun. Relaxing." Amber said before taking another bite of the turkey. _The dark meat is so delicious!_

"What kind of music do you want to play? What do you usually listen to?" the raven-haired girl asked excitedly, bringing her fork down to her plate.

"I don't really know any music. Just what my piano teacher's played. It's all kind of new to me." She shrugged, frowning slightly as she realized she'd eaten all the turkey on her plate. _Well, potatoes are tasty too._

Faridah looked shell-shocked for a moment before pulling her left arm up and opening her omni-tool, quickly typing away. "The city's library has all of their music archives set up so people can listen to whatever they want for free. It's pretty great, I'm just copying the program to your omni-tool." She offered Amber a smirk as she finished up. "I mean, I kind of snooped around on it last night after we brought you here and I noticed there's nothing really on it, so I figured I could add this so you can listen to music. Not exactly the best Christmas gift, but…you know."

Amber was surprised at the offer and caught herself staring at Faridah before turning back to her plate. _I'm not even sure how to use the thing, but…and I barely even know her, and she's…this is weird. Or is it just something I'm not used to? Do people normally just give people gifts?_

"Wow…thanks. I don't know what to say, like I said, I'm kind of new to all this. Thank you?" It was the best she could muster, given the circumstances. She felt her answer was lacking, but Faridah didn't show any sign of it.

"You're welcome! Now…I guess we should get to eating before this all goes cold."

The rest of the dinner went over awkwardly, and Faridah insisted that Amber stay over one more night, hoping she'd change her decision in the meantime. Amber knew she wouldn't, her decision was as set in stone as it could be. _I have to get better at this biotics stuff, I have to be able to protect myself, and I have to wait for Melody. No use wasting away on the streets when I can prepare. And maybe meet some people along the way. I'll try things your way, Mel. I'll put aside revenge…for now. But I swear, if the opportunity presents itself…_

"Lights." She asked the VI, blanketing the room in darkness as her new friend had taught her. She had plenty of time left. She could dread the continuation of training another time. She could dread whatever social interactions awaited her later on in the future. For now, she just wanted to rest.

Sleep came easily that night.

* * *

**A/N: Well, I got another chapter out, one day later than I'd hoped. So…not likely that I'll have another chapter out by Friday night. Sorry, all! I hope I can update during my vacation, but I'll only have a laptop at my disposal, and those things are horrible to type on. Truly the worst keys. **

**So, as I promised, things are getting better, kind of. A final slow chapter before things pick up after a time lapse. I felt I had to cover this, so…yeah. Was nice writing Mel again, she'd been peeking over my shoulder lately, I felt it was a good spot to add her in. **

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Christmas in August! Weird. **

**Anywho, thanks to everyone who reads my story, it warms my heart to know others are enjoying it. Those who leave feedback and favourite/alert the story, well I shall adore you endlessly :) I must say, I couldn't fathom getting near 100 reviews when I started this little story, yet…here I am on the precipice! Thank you all so much! I wish I had some fluffy Blasto-related or Aethyta-related bit to share for celebration, but that will have to wait for later. ;) I'm not exactly a prolific writer.**

**So thank you all so much, I hope you've enjoyed this so far! I'll try to update again soon!**


	16. Chapter 16

_April 9__th__ 2170_

* * *

Amber trudged down the snowy boulevard lazily, her feet carefully stepping into previously stamped down hollows in a futile attempt to keep her feet from getting thoroughly soaked. Spring had once again arrived, but there was no spring in her step; even though she'd worn her warm winter mukluks, she could feel the wet slowly seeping through her socks to her feet. _Probably happened last mission when that Crow guard's knife got stuck in my sole. I'll need to patch that up, I guess._ The 'field training exercises' had been going on for months, and Amber was well versed enough to know that her biotics had been trained close to their peak, at least until she was given an amp. There was only so much control she could muster without one. Viola's employers were transparent in their methods; they wanted to know if she was trustworthy, if she was loyal, if she was worth the investment. It didn't hurt that she'd overheard some conversations Viola had, giving her in edge into what to expect and how to handle herself, but it was still fairly clear beforehand. She swatted some snow off her face and tromped forth around the corner of some old forgotten street, deep into Reds territory.

Her field training was eerily similar to her old courier assignments under Viola when Melody had been alive, which clued her into the notion that she wasn't fully Viola's project anymore, or at least wasn't under the sole supervision of Viola. The woman wasn't violent, she didn't like hurting her, and it wasn't likely that she was the inspiration for the recent 'training exercises'. Amber would still go from point A to point B, but the journey was sometimes more dangerous; gangs, usually the Crows, sometimes intervened, and police forces sometimes chased her around her route. It was a small price to pay considering the potential endgame. _An amp will give me freedom, it'll keep me safe. Until then, I'm just a slightly dangerous teenager with good cardio and an alright punch. I'm just a body rigged with special untapped blue powers._

Amber looked around at the neighbourhood she'd waltzed into, not having recognized it before. It wasn't often she was given a job in the southern part of Ottawa, so she had jumped at the opportunity, eager to see what was to be found down there_. Not a heck of a lot, it seems._ She thought to herself, looking at her snow-caked surroundings. Long-dead trees rested along the sidewalks in their designated squares, though some had toppled over in the past, blocking the unused road, offering up a natural roadblock in the urban environment. The street was populated with a run-down strip mall, a 'gentleman's club', and a dozen or so long abandoned and decrepit buildings that didn't look as if they'd survive another winter. _But they will. They're like us, they'll hang on because nature and logic would have us collapse. Fuck that shit._

A veritable mob occupied the area around the strip club, the majority huddling around a barrel fire-pit or against the wall to protect themselves from the elements; some sheltering their cigarettes from the gusts of snow, some just trying to drink their woes away in as much peace as possible. Most weren't dressed for the weather, even the obvious Reds members; not that it was surprising, winters came and went, taking lives by the dozen. It was hard to find shelter and proper clothing, and even harder to keep it in Reds territory, where survival was the name of the game. Combine that with the amount of gang in-fighting and skirmishes with rival gangs, and there's a lot of destroyed winter wear each season.

As she approached the club, some of the huddling crowd stared at her intently, or made disparaging remarks about her; it had become a common occurrence as her body had filled out and developed, and the words usually washed over her harmlessly. Brushing the snow from herself as well as possible, she pushed her way past the bouncer and strode into the club.

It was a dark, crowded establishment with a haze of smoke populating the ceiling and greasy looking people populating everywhere else. To her right, three women danced around and fawned over presumably a man; she'd only rarely seen women who weren't 'dancers' in places like this before, a fact of the environment that wasn't lost on most of the patrons who had seen her make her way through the club_. I hate these places. I hate these people...deep breaths, Amber. This won't take long. Pick up the package and..._

Her thoughts were interrupted by a hand reaching out under her coat, squeezing her ass. Quickly spinning, she let her knife slide down her coat sleeve into her hand and thrust it down into the clearly drunk man's offending bicep. Blood pounded heavily in her head as adrenaline took over, her anger drowning out the man's anguished cries. She kicked out, her foot landing violently against the now kneeling man's cheek, splaying him out on the floor. Amber spun slowly, gauging her surroundings and seeing if anyone else was foolish enough to make another attempt. The club's patrons seemingly hadn't noticed or even cared, outside of an approaching bouncer. _Disgusting._

She continued through the club, squeezing past the artificially enhanced dancers and the visibly wealthy reds members as she found her way to the VIP section and to her contact. Amber flinched as he came into view, but did her best to keep her stride smooth and confident. _Finch. Motherfucker._

"Ah, the courier bitch has arrived!" he announced loudly, pushing a girl off his lap onto the floor beneath him. "Come, have a seat. Maybe I'll let you have a turn when this one's all used up, if you're a good girl." He grabbed the girl beneath him by the hair and shoved her head toward his crotch. Amber just sat opposite him and continued her glare, doing her best not to reveal how disgusted she felt.

"Just give me whatever package and tell me where to take it. That way we can get this over with." Amber stated icily, eliciting a laugh from Finch.

"My cock, your ass, you fucking bitch!" he said in between laughs. "You just stroll in here as if nothing even fucking happened. I lost a lot of friends because of you, and now I'm stuck down here in this cesspool. When I get back to the top, you're going to feel the hurt. I won't get it over with, it'll be a slow, painful comeuppance, whore. It won't be as quick as that nice little scar I left you to remember me by."

Amber tilted her head and looked away, sighing in exasperation. "You realize you're coming off like a child fucker, right? I'm not even sixteen yet, and if I remember correctly, you're the one who made the calls and got yourself in shit and your men killed. By both of our bosses, apparently. So how about you stop the empty threats and just do what you're told? Maybe I'll forget what you just said to me, even." Once upon a time she wouldn't have been as mouthy to people like Finch, but the past months had hardened her a little, taught her valuable lessons. _Can't give an inch to these guys._

Finch's expression darkened as he leaned forward. "Forget all you like, I'll get what I want in the end. Anyway..." he passed a small steel briefcase across the table to her. "You take this to the east end of Old Elmvale, there's a building near the tracks, 'Kal Tire'. There will be a tire inside with a large red outline around the rim. You know what a tire looks like?" Amber nodded, having looked up older forms of transportation in the past. "The tire will be attached to the floor, and there will be a hollow hidden inside of it. Put the case there. Then go wherever it is the fuck you came from... if you've got brains, you won't fucking come back."

"What, and miss the wonderful company of these people?" Amber chuckled, taking the case and standing up. "I won't come back again. This filth-pit might suit you, but it's a bit too shameful for me."

As she stepped out into the snowy avenue, she noticed the sun was nearly set, casting the cracks of sky splitting apart the billowy storm clouds in a reddish purple tinge. _Days are getting longer, but it doesn't seem to be getting any warmer. Last year was damn cold, summer was short. I hope this year will be a little better..._

The trip wasn't all that long by foot, only around two and a half hours; she could walk for half an hour afterward and call her ride, so it would keep her from being out all night. _Well, it'll be a long one, but at least it'll be over by midnight._ As she trudged out to the road from the entrance, she felt something grip the bottom of her leg. Again, she spun, knife in hand, but stopped upon seeing the small child fearfully gripping her right calf. He was a small boy, perhaps seven or eight, sickly and thin by any standard. He wore a shredded wool sweater and a worn out pair of jeans; his ancient looking running shoes splitting at numerous seams, ensuring his feet were likely freezing and at risk of frostbite. His desperate, pleading steely blue eyes were sunken, stopping her cold in her tracks. _This kid could have been me or Mel if we'd been caught by the Reds...if we'd joined up with them. This could have been me if I wasn't shuttled from orphanage to orphanage because I was a biotic. If I was just a normal homeless kid growing up, he..._

"Please." He mouthed, his words catching and freezing in his throat before they could make it to her. She lowered her gaze to meet his, understanding what he would ask of her if he had the strength. She stared at him for a time, pondering her options and her abilities and her past, then shook her head.

"I can't give you what you think I can. I don't have anything. I...can't protect you. I'm not able to, and... you wouldn't want me to in the end. Being near me is dangerous, kid. I'm just as shitty as they are, so let go so I can leave." She finished, holding her stare, but he kept clinging to her, mouthing the same word over and over. Amber's heart ached as she reached down and yanked his arms from her leg and tromped away, refusing to look back. Unable to look back.

_I can't help him, I can't help anyone right now. I'd just end up getting him killed and it's not like I can bring him home with me. Viola wouldn't agree to that, not after agreeing to give me what I wanted back near the beginning. I mean, maybe if I came back with money...but he'd have it stolen from him. It'd be useless to try and help right now. I can't help anyone like this. I..._ she decided she'd had enough negativity and shook the thoughts from her mind. _I just need to get this drop-off done and go home. I'll need a nice hot shower when I'm done. Fuck._

The walk wasn't too excruciating, but the snow was a little tiring. She made short work of the trip, and when she saw the tire building in the distance, she sighed in relief. Her relief didn't last long though, as she heard others approaching quickly nearby, their footsteps crunching the snow as they ran in her direction. She flitted her eyes to her right and caught sight of three men in black hoodies wielding an assortment of knives and guns, while another set of footsteps to her left signaled her attention. A heavier figure wielding a shotgun approached at a slower clip. _Crows...If they wanted me dead, they would have shot me already. They must want something else from me then...not happening._

Amber spun toward the man wielding the shotgun, pulled her predator from her holster and fired three quick shots at him before rolling behind a nearby pile of junk. A loud yell above the rest of the rabble let her know she'd made some contact with it. _I'm a piss poor shot, but at this range? I'm gonna hit you._ She turned her focus to the three looming in on her, ducking a shot accidentally as she leaned her head out. Sliding back into cover, she tapped her right knee and elbow to ensure her protective gear was firmly attached, before slipping out into the open and running at the three. Amber threw up a weak barrier, flickering in and out each second, hoping to deflect any damage headed her way. She heard a shotgun blast from behind her as she braced forward, feeling fortunate the other gang member had as poor aim as she did. She sprinted forward in the last few metres, disappearing for a second in a blur of blue.

Her charge was still inconsistent in its strength; however Amber was pleased when she felt the familiar crunch as her elbow made contact with a gun wielding gang member's face, splintering the man's skull in a gruesome explosion. Swiftly turning her head to the right, she noticed another of the three had been sent flying into an old, wrecked shipping container by the minor impact. _One dead, one down, one injured, and..._she turned her focus to the last of the three she'd charged, who wavered on one leg, off balance from the attack. _One vulnerable. _She stepped toward him, quickly wiping the dead gang banger's blood wreckage from her face. Just that single attack had drained her a lot, she wouldn't have much more in her tank going forward.

Amber heard another blast from the shotgun and felt a stinging sensation in her back, tumbling her forward slightly. She did her best to use the forward momentum to slide her knife out and thrust it into the off-balance gang banger, crashing both herself and the knife into his ribs. She pulled it out and thrust it in again, before rolling off him and pulling out her Predator again. She pulled the bloody and convulsing body toward her to give her cover in the snow and used his torso as a prop to steady her shot. Firing off another five bursts, she noticed the approaching man grip his neck and collapse onto the snowy ground. _Thank Christ for good luck. Wow._

Amber stood up slowly, cursing out loud at the pain in her back as she made her way over to the unconscious third gang member and ensured he was out cold. _Christ, I shouldn't be complaining considering I got out of this pretty alright, but this is going to add another scar...as if I don't already have enough. Not even worthy to add to the rest._ She felt a sharp pain in her right shoulder blade where the impact had been made as her feet carried her back to the heavier gang member. The man lay still, stiffly clutching his neck in the blood saturated snow, his eyes wide and lifeless. Amber shook her head and looked over his body for anything valuable to take. _I don't get why people have to be so mean. I don't want to hurt anyone, let alone kill them. Christ._ She pulled down his left sleeve, looking for an omni-tool and paused at the tattoo on his wrist. _What the shit? What's a Reds enforcer doing dressed like a crow?_ She mulled the situation over, thinking back to what she knew of Ottawa. _The Reds own most of the southern end of Ottawa, and Crows are out in Orleans and around this area if I remember right. At least, that's where I've run into them the most, so maybe they thought I wouldn't scavenge, but...would Finch try to off me like this? Or are these guys just turncoats? Nah, it's easy to strip a tattoo off skin, no reason they'd keep it._ Amber stripped the man of his omni-tool and left him be. If there was more information to get off him, it would be there. _Looks like Finch thought he could betray Viola and her people again...betrayal...he's going to pay for this._

Amber picked up the shotgun and cleaned her knife in the snow before heading toward her destination. She'd have a lot to think about tonight.

* * *

Amber trod slowly into her unlit room, dropping her bag of equipment at the entrance. Her body felt numb as she traversed over and discarded her clothes into her hamper, removing her top carefully so as to avoid her new wound. She didn't like most of the staff at the facility, but the doctor seemed nice and followed her requests to the word, no matter how absurd or silly she knew they were. He'd used tweezers to remove the shrapnel from her shoulder and applied the medigel with a large swab, no direct contact. It meant that the wound wouldn't be packed as well as it could be, and that it would take longer for the medigel to do its job, but Amber was resolute on the matter. He'd only protested once in the past, which had lead to her leaving his office, making it clear that her cooperation was reliant on his cooperation.

Amber sluggishly walked into her bathroom and frowned at the broken mirror to her right. _Not proud of that. _She thought, recalling when she'd attacked it a half year ago. _Not proud of getting shot either...hell, not proud I'm being such a shit about all this._ Shaking her head, she got into the shower and activated the water jets, turning the temperature dial far into the 'hot' range. Amber stepped into the scalding stream and let the water cascade over her front, her hands helping wipe the grime and sweat from her body. She trusted whatever water that made it past her shoulders to clean the areas she wouldn't touch. She stuck her head under the stream and worked the water into her thick brown mane.

_Can I really blame Finch for being such a deceitful jackass when I'm barely any better? When I've put revenge and my pride ahead of everything else, just like him? When people have given me the chance to make something good of myself, to make my own life... and instead I dig myself deeper into the past and all the shit that kept me down? Can I ever get back to that point, to..._ Amber moved a hand behind her back, hovering over one of the more prominent scars reaching across her torso. _To make up for...this?_ She'd had Viola do the last 'intense training session' personally, wanting her to know intimately what she'd done, what they'd both done. Her need to get back at the woman disgusted herself, but she couldn't help it back then. Her grief and selfishness had driven her to do that, and it only made the wounds that much worse than they already were. _Seems every decision I've made since Mel has been wrong...I just don't know what to do...I just don't... _

Her biotics flared for a moment as despair coursed through her mind. _I'm so sorry, Mel. Why couldn't I have just listened? Maybe then I wouldn't have betrayed you. Maybe then I could have been the kind of person you knew I could be...but now...I can't help but feel I'm slipping even further...I couldn't even help that poor kid...Fuck, I could have tried, but I didn't, and that makes it worse..._

Amber shut the shower off, her body red and raw-looking as she moved to dry herself with her towel. _Christ, I don't know anymore. I just don't know._ She stood in the doorway to her room, staring at her bed. _Been a long time since I've had a good sleep. Been a long time since I deserved one._ As she got to the edge of the bed, her eye caught sight of the familiar elcor drawing she'd pinned above the headboard._ I could have been the sister she deserved, the sister I wanted to be. I'm just so angry these days..._ she thought, her fingers grazing the drawing, a faint grin forming at her lips from the teasing dialogue Melody had written.

She slumped down on top of her sheets, falling onto her side and into the same troubled dreams that had haunted her for months.

* * *

"So what about Jeremy? You KNOW he's been checking you out lately, Fari. And he's cute!" Katie said conspiratorially, nudging Faridah as they made their way to the pool. Faridah enjoyed having Katie around; she was a bit shallow and boy-crazy, but she had a good heart and a good sense of humour, at least usually. She rolled her eyes and swatted back at the tall blonde.

"Jeremy's a bit of a creep, you know his reputation after the party last summer with Alice." She retorted, getting a nod from her other friend beside her, Heather.

"Yeah Katie, that guy's pretty shady." Heather noted. "There are a few other guys giving Faridah the eye, Jeremy's not one of the better ones."

"Oh come on, his dimples have to make up for some of that!" the blonde exclaimed, feigning shock at the two of them. "Alright, fine. Still, he's cute. I'm just saying."

"Besides, I think Isaac might wind up asking me out, and...he's more my type, I think." Faridah said, approaching the ladder of the pool. She spotted Amber in the pool swimming hard across the full length, and an older woman floating in the shallow end. _Huh, she must be finishing her final sprint. I'll probably miss her again. That girl..._

"Isaac...Isaac Richards? Tall and thin, on the basketball team? Sandy blonde? Nice teeth?" Katie pestered Faridah, inquisitively. Faridah nodded and hopped into the pool, lightly splashing her friends' feet.

"Yeah. He's kinda nice." She said wiping her wet hair away from her face.

"But he's a year under you, that's...weird." Heather stated, confused, as she made her way into the pool.

"I'm a grade ahead of him because I skipped seventh grade, Heather. We're the same age, he's a few days older than me actually." Faridah yelled back at her, feeling a bit annoyed at the statement. _He's a nice guy, so what if he's a grade under me?_

"I'm just saying, you're a smart girl, you don't need to settle for less. Besides, I hear he's into butch girls like that one." The short-haired brunette said, pointing out toward Amber. Faridah gave her a playful scowl in return as Heather continued. "He's probably just gay or something."

"Says the toned girl with short hair. That girl's actually pretty...curvy. And she's got long curly hair under her swim cap. You're more butch than her, Heather." Faridah said jovially, swimming backwards to keep an eye on her friends as they swam toward her.

"You know her? From where?" Katie asked, lightly splashing Heather with water, earning a splash in return.

"From here. She's...my friend, I guess." Faridah noted hesitantly. _Though I haven't actually talked to her at any length in a month or two. She even...well, maybe she had reasons. I really should corner her and see what's up._

"Why haven't we seen you hanging out with her? What school does she go to?" The blonde continued her light interrogation, occasionally peeking over at Amber, who was still swimming fiercely from end to end. Faridah shrugged and propped herself against the pool edge.

"We haven't hung out often lately, she's been busy I guess. I don't think she goes to school..." Faridah paused as the words left her mouth. _Fudge, I probably shouldn't have said that. They probably wouldn't understand... _ "But she might be getting private tutoring... I'm not really sure." Faridah hoped it was a convincing enough save, but the others didn't look too impressed. _I guess home schooling isn't all that popular these days...crap._

"Well, you're in the same pool as her and she's not coming over, so...you know." Heather gave an unimpressed glare at Amber and looked back apologetically to Faridah. "Just my opinion though. You know me." Faridah lowered her head slightly_. Heather worries too much about me, she always has. She's just not a people person...probably more like Amber than she'd think_.

"I know. Just...don't worry about her. She's had a hard life, she's probably just trying to keep me away from whatever's troubling her." Faridah said, before splashing Katie. "Anyway, tell me about this party tomorrow night."

The girls swam around for about an hour, just joking with each other and gossiping. Faridah didn't particularly enjoy the high school drama, but she indulged her friends a little by taking part. Occasionally, someone would bring up Amber, who was still sprinting throughout their swim, but she would do her best to steer the conversation away from her_. It's all harmless talk anyway, but they're not her friends, they don't know her. Though maybe I'll ambush her someday soon and invite her out..._

The trio climbed out of the pool and made their way to the change room, Faridah checking over her shoulder and noticing Amber's pace had immediately dropped considerably. _She's probably been here for a long time...and sprinting that much must have exhausted her..._

Faridah waved her friends off after they changed, assuring them she'd meet up with them the next night at the party, then hid in wait for her tired friend. Sure enough, Amber cautiously made her way into the change room a minute or two later, Faridah following her in as silently as possible.

"Hey stranger." She said, announcing her presence as she leaned up against the doorframe of the change room. Amber, to her credit, didn't flinch; instead, she gingerly sat down onto a bench and slowly stripped her swimming gear off, her gaze locked onto a crevice in the floor.

Faridah waited for a few moments and then approached the younger girl. "You haven't hung out with me lately. You haven't even really talked to me, even. Are you okay? Are... are you mad at me?"

Amber's response was immediate, her voice low and breathless, sending a slight chill up Faridah's spine. "No. Why would I be mad at you?" The girl stood, picked up a towel and shower supplies, and backed away into the shower area. "Please don't blame yourself, I've been a bad friend."

Faridah refrained from rolling her eyes and strode after her friend, stripping down to her basics along the way in case she got wet. _This still? I thought we made some progress last summer._ She entered the shower area and stood face to face with the brunette. It still amazed her how much Amber had grown since she'd met her. _Finally got some real meat on her bones, got a nice growth spurt, and...some enviable assets._ Faridah realized she was staring and averted her eyes. _Of course, she can't see the forest for the trees, so..._

"Well, I forgive you, if it means anything." Faridah stated, and held up her hand when she saw Amber was going to object. "No, really. Your life's different than mine, I don't know what you do with it these days, but I just want to remind you that friends spend time together. I'd like that again, if you can do that."

Amber hung her head and kicked her foot behind her to turn the shower on. "You deserve better you know."

"I deserve better than a pity party from you." Faridah responded quickly. "Once upon a time you used to smile. Friends usually smile when they see each other."

"Do they?" the brunette asked sheepishly, her question just a mask for her own disappointment. _ Not often I can tell what she's feeling. Things must be pretty bad..._Faridah thought to herself.

"Yeah, they do, but you just swam by again and again. You're exhausted, and I'm worried about you. Give me something, girl." Faridah pleaded, feeling a little frustrated, and finding her focus shifting away from Amber's face. _Snap out of it, Faridah!_

"I'm sorry." Amber's words were whispers, barely audible above the sound of the water spraying across her shoulders and neck.

"I said I forgave you, so don't give me that. Tell me what's up with you, what you've been doing the last few months, why you're so obviously messed up right now...I can't help unless you let me know how." Faridah took a step forward and Amber took a step backward immediately, the water now coursing down from the top of her head. The brunette flipped her hair behind her, the look on her face sending quakes in Faridah's heart.

"I don't know, Faridah. I'm not sure anyone can help me." Amber's eyes locked onto hers intensely, her glistening hazel eyes looking sea-green in the light of the shower room. Faridah took another step forward into the shower stall and Amber backed away again, mere millimeters from the wall.

"Give me a chance, Amber. It's..." Faridah paused, looking at the girl in front of her. _She looks like a cornered animal. She's always so...wild, I guess. I feel bad for bringing this up, but..._ "It's your back still, isn't it?" She could see the shame ripple across her friend's face as Amber took a half step back, her foot connecting with and resting on the wall.

"I can't..." Amber meekly started, her speech cracking as her eyes darted around the area anxiously. "It's not anything I can fix. It's always going to be there, it...it needs to be there, and I'm never going to get away from that."

Faridah's mouth quirked to the side as she thought of what to say. Amber had been notoriously cryptic about the whole issue, and why it hurt her so much. _She's sworn to me so many times it had nothing to do with the pain, but...I don't know if I can believe that. What else could it be? _"Look, Amber, I don't know what's behind all this, and if you can't tell me, or don't want to...then sure. I just think..." Faridah paused, trying to think before she spoke, knowing it was a sensitive issue. _Focus, Faridah, focus!_ "I think if you let this eat you up, define you, then it'll always hurt."

Amber shook her head, tension visibly building in her body. Faridah found her eyes straying down and fought to keep her gaze locked onto her friend's. _What the heck is going on? I mean, it's not like she's going to show me her back, so why am I...whatever. Just focus, Faridah._

"I deserve this. These...these help remind me..." Amber's words were soft, contrasting with her form; each syllable stumbling out of her mouth.

Faridah stepped forward , slightly into the stream of lukewarm water. "Doesn't sound like it's helping you, to me. No one deserves to beat themselves up like you have. Just..."

"I betrayed my sister, alright? Fuck!" The sudden change of tone was surprising and sent the raven-haired girl a half step backward, her heart beating noticeably faster. _Well, that's one answer._ She thought, trying to calm herself. That Amber's eyes seemed on fire didn't help any. "And get out of the shower, you're getting wet!"

Faridah reached out slowly for Amber with one hand and had it swatted away, her hand stinging a little from the impact. Again, shame flashed across the brunette's face, soon turning to nervous apprehension. _Lashing out like a wounded animal. Just...be patient..._

"Can we talk about it?" Faridah asked gently, taking a half step forward, leaving her a breath away from her friend. "I don't want you to go through this alone."

Amber flinched at the closed distance. "I'm not just some experiment you're tearing apart in order to see how it works, am I?" Amber paled at her own words, immediately facepalming; her form slumped down onto the hard floor, hugging her knees with her other arm. "Fuck, I'm a horrible person for saying that. Christ...I'm sorry, I...I'm really sorry." she muttered, shaking her head. Faridah stood over her for a moment, deciding whether to just leave._ I'm not like that. She's a person, I'd never do that. Especially not to a friend... Did she really mean that or...come on Faridah, she's terrified. You can ride her ass about it later, maybe get her to spill on what's eating her, but she needs you now._

She reached over and turned off the shower, then knelt down to eye level with the distraught girl and placed a hand on her knee. "And this is why you've been avoiding me? Why you stayed in the pool today until me and my friends left?" she asked, receiving a slow nod from the brunette, the girl's head lowering further. "We won't bite, you know."

Amber looked up and wiped a strand of hair from her own face. "They're really different. I don't really get them...I'm not sure I get you either. Like I said, you have different lives than I do. It confuses me and I don't fit into that. I don't think I can ever have that." She said, averting her gaze off to the side wall. "And they said some stuff about me. I didn't understand it, but I understood the way they said it."

Faridah reached out and caressed the back of Amber's head, her fingers entwining in the wet brown curls, bringing the younger girl's eyes up to meet Faridah's gaze. _Those eyes...so expressive..._ The raven haired girl sat there marveling at them for a moment before speaking. "I'm sorry about that, they were just joking around and...well, they don't know you. I'm sure you'd like them if you gave them a shot, and I know they'd give you a chance too. There's this party tomorrow night..."

"I don't think I can make it." Amber said quickly, once again shifting her gaze away from Faridah.

"You don't have to go but I'd like you to. Think of it as making up for that slip of the tongue a few minutes ago. Besides, I know that you've had Saturdays off for over a year, it's your free day." She stated playfully, massaging the back of Amber's neck with her hand, eliciting a soft sigh from the girl. Faridah once again felt blood pulsing through her skull and did her best to focus on the task at hand. "I just don't want you to feel like you have to go through this alone. I'm your friend, I want to help... so that maybe one day you can trust me when I say you're a good person."

Amber offered a light laugh, bringing a smile to the older girl's face. _Victory!_ "Well, if a good person is someone who insults their friends and abandons them for months, then I guess I fit the description." _Alright, self depreciating humour might not be a victory, but..._

She moved her hand around the girl's head to her cheek, cupping her face gently in it. "And you know why you did that, and I can understand why you did it, I guess. I just want you to be happy. To go after life with a full heart and know I'll be there to help you." She whispered, her eyes scanning intently over the sullen girl's face. She felt reluctant to do so, but she dropped her hand from Amber's face and lightly held her necklace. "And you're never alone."

Amber's face was still for what seemed like an eternity. Faridah considered trying to console her friend again, but Amber's mouth stretched out into a dazzling smile. Her shock held as she felt Amber lean forward, a curly-haired head resting against her cheek and arms wrapped around her neck, bringing her to a blush.

"Thanks. I...I needed that. For the first time in months I feel like...like I can be more than this. Thank you for reminding me." Amber said softly, each word signaling her relief. "And...I'll go with you to that thing."

Faridah's brows quirked up in surprise. "You will? Are you sure?" She felt Amber's cheek glide up and down hers as she nodded, and felt herself flush slightly.

"Yeah. Just...if you can be patient with me...I won't know what to do. I don't want to embarrass you, but I think that's probably too much to hope for." She said, her soft laughter caressing the older girl's ear.

"Well, just...uh..." Faridah started, but her mind felt foggy and off-balance. _It's been a weird day, that must be it. I'll just finish up here._ "Well, we'll improvise, and you'll do your best...and I'll be there if you feel uncomfortable and need to get away from it all. I'm... everything will be fine." She gently placed her palms on Amber's collarbone, knowing that her shoulders were off limits, and nudged Amber off of her. She stood up, words hurriedly spilling out her mouth. "I should, uh, leave you to your shower. I need to get home too."

Amber gave her another smile and nodded, bringing pause to the older girl's frantic mind. "I'll let you know on your omni where to find me tomorrow. Thanks again, Faridah. You're a good friend."

Faridah returned the smile and waved goodbye, returning to the lockers to change back into her clothes. _Well, I'm happy she's feeling a bit better...and I can't believe she's going to the party tomorrow! Wow! That...I didn't expect that. Well, she still wouldn't let me see her back, but hey, whenever she's comfortable, I think she will. Not that I'm complaining about how it turned out...though I'll probably have to lend her something of mine for tomorrow night. Though that might be nice... I wonder what would fit her best..._she pondered, her mind matching Amber with her own wardrobe. _She'd look pretty hot in...hrm. Why am I this excited about it, anyway? She's going to be a nervous mess...maybe a...no, no, keep things in context, Faridah! Just...well, I'm feeling a little clearer in the head now. That's odd. Well, I should probably get going instead of daydreaming like this_.

As she stepped into her mom's skycar, she felt a thrill of excitement she hadn't experienced in a long time. _I have a feeling that things are going to look up!_

* * *

**A/N: Well, my vacation's been cut short a day, so I figured I would pound this chapter out, since I can't travel up the coast for a day like I was planning. Oh well, I'm just going to be losing one beach day tomorrow. I'll wave goodbye to it as I take the long 11 hour drive home. :\ I'm going to miss the smell of the ocean the most, I think. Intoxicating!**

**Anywho, I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Included some (imo) well needed action, and some fairly important drama, alongside a necessary time skip. Yes, it was long. Yes, I'll explain why it was such a big jump next chapter. You're going to have to be patient :) Lots and lots of dialogue and internal musings, which I love writing, but I hope it wasn't too exhausting for you all. Sometimes the conversations just go on for forever and the characters keep wanting to talk and I have to tell them to be quiet for a bit. Sometimes they behave ;) And Amber's gotten a bit more filled out, and it seems Cerberus has trained her in some rather violent extracurricular activities! Gasp! **

**So yeah, thank you everyone who's read this (not so) little fic of mine, and super happy thumbs up and cyber hugs to all those who have reviewed, given feedback and favourite/alerted my fic! You all make my day :) **

**I hope you enjoy your weekend!**


	17. Chapter 17

"Better late than never, sleepyhead." Melody's voice rang through the air, prompting Amber's eyes to flutter open, taking in the warm spring afternoon. _The first bit of spring we've had all year, really..._she thought, her body objecting to the interruption of her slumber with little aches and pains as she sat up. Mel was sitting on the lowest branch of her tree, swinging her legs in the air playfully. The tree seemed fully grown, confusing the older girl. _It wasn't supposed to be this tall yet, was it?_ She wondered before her mind returned to Melody's statement, which seemed to contrast with the girl's cheerful face.

"Oh, uh, sorry. I know I should have visited on your birthday last year, and...I just..." Amber started before an acorn bounced off her forehead, startling her.

"I wasn't talking about you, Birdy. I was just complaining about how late Spring has been this past while. And how long it took for me to actually get a glimpse of nature that wasn't a hundred percent brown. Dirt's not as exciting as it might sound." She noted, a goofy smile spread across her face. Amber's left eyebrow quirked up in amusement.

"It doesn't sound exciting at all, actually." She retorted, unable to restrain a light laugh at her sister's expense. "I thought you'd enjoy it compared to being pestered by squirrels."

Melody scowled slightly at the remark. "Yeah, they're jerks too, but there's this bubble or something keeping them out. Means I can tease them all day. Birds too, although you're allowed in, I guess. But only if you stop being mopey all the time."

"Yeah, I guess I've been a bit out of it lately, haven't I?" Amber asked apologetically, standing up. "Well, maybe a bit more than just lately..."

"More like your whole life, Birdy. Don't your shoulders ever get heavy? I swear, it's like you do all you can to carry other people's burdens, or what you think are other people's burdens, and can't look at anything but the ground in front of your feet." Amber's head lowered at her sister's concern. "You're allowed to be free, you know. You were with me, for a lot of it."

Amber moved over to the tree and leaned up against it. "You know me Mel, I always feel I need to help people." _Not like you haven't told me before. Not that you aren't right, Mel. I would've done anything to keep you safe. Though that kid from the strip club..._

"Then help them, but let them find their own feet. Don't baby them, don't solve all their problems for them, or they won't ever get better. You can't do that, you can't survive that, it's impossible." Melody said softly as she gracefully dropped down from the branch and moved toward her sister. "You can't go around trying to save everyone, because you'll fail, and you'll only get hurt. Not every person can be saved, Birdy, but that burden's not on you. Be a crutch, until they can learn to walk on their own again. Be their shelter until they're ready to brave the storm. Help them save themselves. We are our only saviours, Amber."

Amber sighed and slunk down the tree trunk until she was sitting down against it. "I'm not sure I know how to do that. I've kind of been an all or nothing kinda person for...well, forever." Amber felt Melody rustle her curls and heard her sister plop down beside her.

"You helped me go from a scared little girl to one who was confident to do things on her own, because I knew if I fell you'd be there to catch me. But you supported me too, taught me that my emotions were part of my character, not a weakness. You'd catch me, but you'd let me try again. You wouldn't stop me. You helped me grow to where I didn't need you anymore like that, even if I still wanted to be with you all the time. You helped me save myself in a way... I learned how through you, but you aren't letting yourself see that, which is pretty darn annoying, you know." Amber slowly nodded at her sister's explanation, sticking her legs out into the cool patch of grass she sat on. In a way, it felt like summer.

"So...then what have I been doing all this time that's so different? I...get what you're saying Mel. It makes sense, and this past year or two has been enough for me to know that I can't keep on doing...well, this. Whatever it is. Even if I feel I need to. I..." Her words halted as Melody grabbed hold of both of her cheeks playfully, grinning at her older sister. Amber stared unimpressed at her sister before breaking out into an amused grin.

"See? Was that so hard, Birdy? You've been so serious! No wonder you're so mopey, you barely ever smile." Melody noted happily, admiring her work before letting go of her sister's face. "What's different is how you've been guilt tripping yourself in my name, and trying desperately to find something to save that honestly didn't need saving in the first place. Or might not deserve it. You can't save that girl and her mother, they need to realize they can save themselves, if they need it at all. You can help, but don't hurt yourself in an effort to save them from something they're probably not aware of. And don't torment yourself because you're upset that you did something good for me."

Amber paled slightly and turned her gaze to the redheaded girl beside her. "Mel, you KNOW I screwed up. I was selfish."

"Maybe a little, but again, you're my big martyr of a sister, and I know you. Yeah, you might have been a wee bit mad, but you did what you could to protect me and help me after I...well, passed on I guess. You helped give me a new start! And come on, you had no other real options, because you'd always give me this last wish." Melody finished, hugging Amber closer to her. The brunette leaned into the embrace, finding comfort in the familiarity.

"You told me you wanted me to love myself." She said simply, her voice tinged with confusion.

"Well, yeah, but that takes time, and I wanted to be there when you did. I made you a promise that we'd see the colonies. You said you'd hold me to that promise. Here we are, for better or worse, and in a few years I'll be dropping acorns like nobody's business, ready to be taken off to Drasta or Ferris Fields, or wherever. Open your eyes to the good that you're doing, don't just focus on the bad. Otherwise you'll be stomping all over your nest instead of taking flight."

The brunette mulled over her sister's words. "I'm...I'm such an idiot, I guess." She laughed. "I kind of forgot all about that part in the midst of this. In a few years, huh? Can you make it by my eighteenth birthday? I'd love to get out of here with you as soon as possible, and maybe then I'll...I'll have gotten to that other promise."

"I can't ask you to make your heart feel something it won't, Amber. But I can ask that you try to put this behind you. I don't blame you for what you did. I don't hate you for what happened to you. I love you, you're my sister, and these..." Melody stated softly, her hand pulling back from Amber's waist and gently running over where the scars were on her back. "These can mean whatever you want them to, but I really, really don't want them to mean that you think you let me down. You didn't. How about you work on that by your eighteenth, and I work on kicking out a boatload of acorns by then, hrm?"

Amber smiled at the reassurance, feeling a massive weight lift from her chest. _It'll take a while to not think that, I...I still feel terrible when I think of them... but at least I've got her in my corner supporting me._ "That sounds like a good plan, Mel." She whispered, hopeful that she could will herself to change.

"Of course it does, you goof. I thought of it! Besides, it doesn't hurt putting the focus on yourself for once and admitting you need help too." she gave her sister her trademark toothy grin and playfully nudged her in the side. "Now, it's been a while, who've you been hanging around with?"

"Oh, uh, just one person, really, outside of Joel... if you can count a small handful of short chats over the past six months as 'spending time', I guess." Amber stammered, pulling her knees toward her and resting her chin between them. "I kind of pushed her away in the past months." Amber glanced over at Melody, who was giving her a rather funny looking scowl. She knew her little sister was trying to look serious, but she could never pull the look off properly.

"Birdy..." she growled, her head inching closer to Amber's in a failed attempt to be menacing. The brunette could barely restrain her laughter.

"I know, I know!" She shot out, shrinking her body a bit as she tried to relay to her sister that she understood her frustration. "Look, I talked to her yesterday and I'm going to some party thing tonight. Not sure it's a good idea, but I owe her. She kind of got my head levelled out a bit, and I really needed that."

Melody huffed indignantly. "You're sixteen now. You should be better at this, you're going to need friends when you get older. They're not like poisonous spiders or anything, they're good to have. People can be great."

"Even if they're really different?" Amber asked mutedly.

Melody ruffled Amber's hair teasingly. "Especially if they're really different! That's how you learn about all types of people! That's how you learn that we're really all more like each other than we are different."

"Yeah, well, Faridah's kinda really odd. Not to mention she's Viola's daughter..." Amber started before being interrupted.

"And you're actually giving her a chance?" Melody reeled back in mock surprise, before nearly tackling her sister. "I knew you had it in you. Do you know how proud of you I am? My Birdy, friends with a girl with a witch for her mother. And she's nice?"

Amber thought for a moment before answering. "Viola's her aunt, not her mother, but...well, yeah, Faridah's nice. She kinda saved my life once, and has given me my space ever since. Even yesterday, she knew I didn't want her to touch my back, and she didn't. Though...she was acting a little strange yesterday. Not real sure what was up with her."

Melody pulled back slightly and looked inquiringly at her sister. "What do you mean?"

Amber shrugged and continued. "I think she kind of expected a lot more scars on me because she kept looking at me all over... I mean, I'm not all that self conscious about my scars aside from...well, you know...so I didn't mind, but she hadn't done that before. Probably because I hadn't talked to her in months. Was probably worried...she's the worrying type."

"Well, you're looking a lot healthier than the last time I saw you, so maybe that's why. You're all fed and you've got a bunch of muscle. Probably surprised her, I know I was surprised." Melody noted, deep in thought.

"Yeah, probably. I just hope her friends don't hate me. I don't want to make her uncomfortable." Amber said, leaning back into her sister a bit. A noise sounded far off in the distance, too vague to discern its source.

"If they hate you, they're jerks. Just be you, and give them a chance, and they'll probably really like you like I do." Melody stated firmly. "Well, it looks like you gotta go back now. Make sure they keep the squirrels away, will you?"

"Already? I'm going to miss you, Mel." Amber said dejectedly, before gently kissing her sister's forehead. "I love you too much for these talks of ours to happen every few dozen months."

"Well, maybe if you pray by my Elcor drawing..." the redhead said jokingly, before sticking out her tongue at her sister. "But yeah, we should do this more often. Have a happy birthday, Amber. I love you too, sis."

Amber watched Melody stand up and escape back into the tree, waving at her from the lowest branch. Her next blink was sluggish and her eyes fluttered open to reveal a clear blue afternoon sky, and a cooler breeze caressing her face. She smiled at the comfort the dream had given her and sat up to greet her visitor, making sure not to disturb the small sapling beside her.

* * *

Amber sat in Faridah's skycar, marveling at how the twilight made passing buildings and wildlife look so strange. Even after a year of constantly taking skycars around the city at this time of night, it never failed to impress her. _Window seats have their advantages..._she thought, smiling as she let the environment drown out Heather and Faridah's discussion. She'd done her best to pay attention and make small talk until one of the girls had brought up classmates; from there, the conversation became a one on one, and Amber had lost track of time since she'd had nothing worthy of input. _Just wouldn't make sense for me to talk about that. Besides, the view from up here is nice._

A nudge brought her focus back to the other two passengers beside her. Faridah was looking at her expectantly, and Heather seemed almost annoyed. _Uhh..._

"I'm sorry, what? I kinda zoned out there." Amber said sheepishly.

"What do you find cute in a guy?" Faridah repeated. Amber tried to focus, but Heather's ungodly and unblinking stare was giving her unease. _What do I like in a guy? What do I find cute? Hrm..._

"Well, I'm not sure. I...uh, nice eyes are always good? Or if they're kind? I don't know." Amber's words stumbled out nervously; she could feel her cheeks getting steadily warmer under the girls' scrutiny.

"Have you ever kissed a guy before?" Heather asked, her tone seeming more like an interrogation than a light-hearted question, but Faridah didn't seem to pick up on that, too busy eagerly awaiting the younger girl's answer.

Amber leaned slightly away from them, feeling a little claustrophobic. "No." She spoke warily, her eyes slowly shifting between the other girls. "But it's not like I've had any good chances to or anything."

"Why not? Are you home-schooled or a hermit or something?" Heather asked again, shifting closer to Amber.

"Home-schooled? Uh...well, I teach myself. I go to the library twice a week and study for about eight hours, then I take my lessons from Joel..." Amber started, curious about why the topic was breached in the first place, before Faridah chimed in.

"Joel? Who's he? Is he cute? What does he teach?" she asked excitedly, before bringing her focus back to the main screen. The skycar was on autopilot, but it was always a good idea to keep a regular check on things.

Amber gave a surprised laugh and shook her head. "Joel's probably a hundred years old by now, but he's a nice guy. The head librarian, I think. He teaches piano to me."

"Piano? Like, a synthesizer keyboard, or an actual old school piano?" Faridah inquired again, looking slightly disappointed, but still intrigued.

"The old one. It's actually really fun. I'm still junk at it, really, but it's relaxing." Amber noted, a smile crossing her face at the memory of her last lesson. She'd finally perfected an easy song to train on, and for a moment she wished she was at home playing it instead of on route to a party. _This is for the best, I'll actually get a feel for...people, I guess. I can always play when I get home._ "Do any of you play music?"

Faridah shook her head and Heather shrugged, leaving Amber slightly disheartened_. I was hoping I'd have that in common, at least..._

Faridah picked on Amber subtle change in expression and gave her an apologetic smile. "Lots of people play instruments, really. Katie's in choir, actually, you could talk to her about it! It's just that we never really took to music like that."

"Oh, alright. That sounds like a..." Amber began before being interrupted.

"If you don't mind me asking, how did you get that scar on your face?" Heather asked, her eyes clearly focused on the slightly jagged mark leading diagonally across her cheek down to her jawline. Amber's fingers went up and felt it, without her even thinking.

"I was stabbed in the face by a jerk." Amber said quietly, her mind returning to that night again, her eyes ablaze in a barely restrained fury. "That's...all I think I can say without getting kind of angry, and I don't really want that right now."

"I'm...sorry. How did you and Faridah meet, anyway?" Heather asked curiously, her tone a little softer than it had been. Amber blushed a little and stretched the stiffness from her back. _Girl asks a lot of questions..._

"Oh, we were alone in the pool one day and apparently she thought I was going to collapse and die or something." Amber joked, grinning at the raven-haired driver.

"That's not true, I just thought you'd...well..." She started, Heather's inquisitive glance goading her on. "You looked like you MAYBE weighed seventy pounds soaking wet. You looked like a short walk would kill you, let alone an hour long hard swim. I'm just saying."

"Why were you so thin?" Heather asked, this time looking a little concerned, but her gaze was still a bit too intense to tell for sure. Amber shrugged in response.

"Spent a lot of my life eating a small meal every other day or longer, and when I was forced onto the street, all I could afford was nutrient paste. Not much food in those tubes, and when you're eating once a day..." Amber began, casually recounting her history when she felt a hand clasp her shoulder.

"You were...what?" Amber ignored the short haired brunette's shocked expression and continued.

"I'm an orphan and I was homeless for a bit. Shit happens... I lived alright back then, and I'm doing alright now. Anyway, when you don't eat much, and you do a lot of running, you end up pretty thin. Faridah thought I was starving, but I was actually doing fine. She kept pestering me and ignoring me when I said I was alright, and I blew up at her. Then a while later I apologized and...well, that's how we met."

Heather still looked slightly shell-shocked, turning to face the windshield in front of her. "Oh...thanks for answering. I'm sorry if I was rude." The girl said quietly. Amber reached out and lightly shook her shoulder.

"Don't worry about it, and I don't think you've been rude." She said, hoping to reassure her.

Faridah peeked her head toward the two. "You have been a bit intense, though, Heather. Gotta dial that back, girl."

"Hah, yeah. I guess I forget myself sometimes." The short haired brunette noted, turning back to Amber. "So, do you live alone?"

Amber nodded. "Well, yeah, in a way. I have my room, my bed, my holo-piano, my bathroom, my...I live by myself, but I'm not exactly alone, I guess."

She could see that her answer confused both of the girls, the gears spinning in both of their heads as they digested the words.

"So, you have friends over all the time? I thought you...hrm." Heather's response relayed her confusion, for once stumbling on her words.

"No, no. I don't really have friends, but I've gotten kind of used to that, even though I really shouldn't be. It'd be nice to have someone letting me know how hard I suck." Amber said, pausing when Heather's mouth dropped. "...At the piano..."

Faridah nudged Heather playfully. "It's alright, the girl's mind drops into the gutter all the time." Her words earned her a light jab in the ribs from her peer, which she played up in jest, eliciting a laugh from Amber. "Anyway, speaking of minds in gutters, I hope you don't mind the outfit I picked out for you tonight."

Amber hadn't truly been able to forget about it, the dress and leggings squeezing areas that her body wasn't used to having squeezed. She did, however, enjoy the soft purple material the dress was made of. _Reminds me of one of the lilies Melody liked that one time in the park._ "It's uh...nice, I guess...just weird. Not really used to this. I'm not sure it looks good on me."

Heather looked to Faridah and then back to Amber. "Sorry Faridah, but you can't honestly say I'm more butch than Amber, here. No offense, but I just get this butch lesbian vibe from you, and let me guess...you usually wear plaid flannel and baggy jeans?" Heather's tone was pretty light, though Amber didn't really have any idea what she was talking about. _Butch? Lesbian? I think I've heard those words before but I'm not sure what they mean...and plaid flannel? What am I, a lumberjack? Just...try to react casually. _She looked from the windshield back to the two girls, Faridah's gaze a little more intent on her than Heather's, but together it was stifling. _Is this like, some big question or something, unlocking the meaning of life? I don't get it..._

"Oh come on," she said laughing more out of confusion than anything. "I think I'm missing a big black beard and an axe. No, I just wear sweaters, t-shirts, jeans...not just baggy ones. Just because I'm not used to wearing a dress and these really tight pants thingies doesn't mean I can't be a little feminine. I'd like to think there's more to me than what I wear. I spend a lot of the day working out or...harder things. I like to be comfortable when I do that."

Faridah turned her gaze back to the wilderness ahead of her and Heather nodded thoughtfully, grinning a little.

"Fair enough, fair enough. Is this your first party?" she asked.

"Yeah, I don't really know what to expect, but I figure I'll wing it." Amber said, nodding._ Let's hope winging it will actually work. This could be a big mistake...a disaster, even._

"You'll be fine. Just...it's your first time so I wouldn't drink much or any wine, beer, liquor, or whatever. You're just a kid and you're not really legal age yet, so you should stay away from that stuff, especially if you haven't had it before. Aside from that, don't let guys...or girls...grope you much. Faridah chose a...an adventurous outfit for you and you'll probably be hit on. Just...don't think too hard about it. If you're interested in them, keep talking to them. If you're not, find a way to get away from them. Just try and be yourself, and if anyone gives you a hard time, Faridah or I will be there, or Katie. She kind of likes everyone, so she'll be there too." Heather noted, reminding Amber of a nun from a previous orphanage from how the girl was trying to teach her, how she was speaking to her with as much reassurance as she could muster. _Heather seems to be kind of nice too. Intense, but nice._

"And there will be a lot of people there. Probably close to eighty, or more, so...try to stay close if you feel overwhelmed, I'll probably notice and try to sneak away from others to spend some time with you." Faridah mentioned, the speed of the skycar decelerating slowly. "Just...relax. Be yourself, and let me know if you're not feeling well. I don't want you to spend the night hating me for bringing you here, after all."

"I told you I wanted to come." Amber said, slightly exasperated by the amount of advice tossed her way. _I want to make this work, I want to see what it's like, if I can fit somewhere among all these people. I'm not a fragile terrified little girl. Just...a little nervous._

Heather giggled, her hand covering her mouth, before resting her other hand on Amber's shoulder. "What Faridah's saying is that she's a huge worrywart and she wants every chance she can get to suffocate you with...comfort."

Faridah looked at her older friend curiously before shrugging and turning to Amber. "I just want you to have a good night. If it means you need to leave the party, so be it. I'd like for you to have a good time here though."

Amber smiled back at her, mentally preparing herself for the event. "I'm sure I'll be fine. Anyway, it seems like we're here..." Amber glanced out the window at the large cottage. Nearly each window was lit up, there was music emanating loudly from its direction, and at least two dozen people were scattered around the premises.

_For better or worse, here I go..._

* * *

The party atmosphere was something Amber had immediately recognized upon entering its vicinity. She knew the smells, the varying levels of banter, and the primal rhythms of the music. She knew the lenient personal boundaries, the overwhelmingly sexual body language, the liquids nearby to help ease objections or to help forget the night ahead. She wasn't hasty to make the comparison, but the party was relentless in its efforts to convince her that it was similar to a strip club, except there weren't any workers employed or being paid, no one seemed to be forced into sex, at least in public, and the ratio of women to men was more on par.

_And someone decided to turn their house into this because their parents were away for the weekend. The least they could have done is rented out a club downtown instead of disrespecting their home like this. Christ...all it's missing is a pole or two and some red lighting._

Amber lightly swirled the drink in her hand, enjoying how it fizzed. Faridah had been kind enough to bring a bottle of sparkling lemonade for her, which tasted alright, but was more amusing than anything. She took another sip, placing the finished bottle on the counter, and moved out of the kitchen and into the large room that had been repurposed as a dance hall. _Out of the frying pan and into the fire..._ she internally grumbled, but she knew she had to give it all a chance_. I owe myself at least that much._

There were a few dozen in the room, some dancing in pairs, some by themselves; Amber made a mental note to study dance the next time she was at the library, because everywhere she looked she could see a variety of different dancing styles. _Hrm...well, maybe I should try? I...don't think I'll be any good at it, but so long as I move to the music, I think I should be passable... _

She moved her way toward the crowd and joined in mid-song, taking a few moments to find her feet and mimicked a fairly simple dance she'd spotted across the floor. As she moved herself to the thunderous beat of the song, her mind wandered. _Why the hell is the music so loud? I mean, you can have some powerful music at lower volume. It's just...it's shaking and vibrating my body and it's a little...well, it makes me feel weird. Maybe... _she glanced around, looking to find someone she knew, but only found strangers. Amber noticed most of the couples seemed a lot more fluid and comfortable with the music than her and the others going solo. _Maybe that's the point of it. Maybe this kind of music needs a partner. I do feel a little weird dancing like this by myself...I mean, I'm not dancing like a stripper, but...oh well..._

Amber closed her eyes and continued her little experiment, songs coming and going, blending into one another, and her body adjusting its rhythm to keep in harmony with the music. She felt the music reverberate through her body to her core, where her hips kept time, swaying and pivoting gently, guiding her legs around her small personal bubble; her feet gradually learning to glide instead of merely step. Her arms floated around her form, and for a while she felt as if she were a conductor, keeping time and communicating how her body, her instrument, was to move; her shoulders slowly rocking to the beat she was keeping, her core pulling everything into a single harmonious movement, a symphony of sorts. For a moment, as a song stumbled into the next, she felt self-conscious, that she was probably horrid at dancing. _People are probably laughing and I've been too busy to notice...is that why I closed my eyes? Hrm...No._ she thought, sweeping the thoughts from her mind, letting herself get lost in the music again. _I feel like I can be free here, that I can just set aside all the shit in my life..._

Her breath hitched at the realization she was coming to. _Maybe that's what this is for...to just have a bunch of other people around you wanting the same thing, to turn something familiar into something you need...maybe not for forever, but for just a little while...maybe that's not a bad thing at all..._

Amber opened her eyes, surprised she was coming to enjoy the party more than she'd thought. A taller stocky guy with scruffy facial hair danced a few feet in front of her and was startled as his eyes met hers. She couldn't make out many of his features due to the darker light. _I wonder if he's noticed my scar? Most people tend to be weirded out by it_. Amber kept dancing, though raised an eyebrow as if to ask what's wrong.

The guy stumbled slightly, his dancing having gotten more deliberate and less fluid. "Oh, I hope you don't mind that I'm dancing near you. Your eyes were closed and I...uh..." He blurted out nervously. "Can I still dance here?"

Amber recoiled slightly, her mouth twisting in confusion. "Well, you're dancing there right now, and...if you're having fun then dance away. Don't worry about it."

The two kept on moving to the music, Amber feeling comfortable enough to keep her eyes open, actively glancing around the room. After a few songs the guy took a step toward her, leaning into her personal space a little.

"I'm going to go get a drink, you want something?" he yelled at her, trying to be heard above the loud music. Amber shrugged and nodded.

"Water, I guess." She replied, nonchalantly. "Thanks!"

Her pseudo dancing partner disappeared through the crowd, leaving her to dance by herself._ Not that I was dancing WITH him, really. I mean..._she looked over to a nearby couple who were practically hanging off each other. _...I don't think I could do that. Too much touching...but maybe...well, maybe not with just anyone...but...it would probably be really nice..._

She scanned the room again and saw another pair, dancing incredibly off-beat and limbs going every which way. Amber found herself grinning at them, finding their confidence in dancing like that a little inspiring. _And the way they look at each other...their eyes haven't left each other and...Christ..._ she thought, blushing furiously. _You're a human being too, don't feel bad for feeling a little envy. So you'd like to look at someone that way...so...so you'd like someone to look at YOU that way. Maybe you're not so different, but..._she felt her hand come up and trace her scar. _Maybe you kinda are. I've got no fucking clue._

Amber felt the song change, and soon after felt a warmth in the air behind her. She wasn't so secluded from the crowd of people; there were people at nearly every angle around her, but no one had moved this close to her on purpose, that she had been aware of. Turning her head she saw a fairly attractive guy dancing close behind her, his eyes drooping slightly from the alcohol he'd drunk, and a light sweat glistening on his face and neck. Amber slowly pivoted around to face him, and continued her dance. The guy gave her an appraising look over and shot her a perturbed frown.

"I think I liked the other view better, turn around." His tone was in jest, but the words put Amber off, her body stopping its adherence to the music.

"No thanks." She said, placing her hands on her hips. "Besides, I...have a partner already. He's off getting drinks."

"You mean him?" the guy asked, pointing into the crowd. Amber followed his gaze and found her former 'dance partner' grinding up against another girl. _Oh, well, that's cool. Could have let me know, but a water's just a water._

Amber shrugged."Look, I don't do that kind of dancing so...go find someone else. Besides, it looks like I have water to fetch."

Amber turned around, making her way toward the kitchen door before she felt and surprisingly heard a sharp impact on her rear. Her body immediately went into auto-pilot as her brain worked to gain control of herself as fast as it could. She spun around and, noticing his hands were high, used her momentum to crash her fist upward into his lower left side, aiming for his liver. As he tumbled onto his knees, face scrunched and gasping for breath, her mind cleared. _Fuck, I really, really wanted to just behave and have a good night. No violence...so much for that._ She leaned her body over his and glared at him icily as he started to heave. _Though I have to admit, he deserved worse...no one touches me like that. No one_.

"The last man who did that to me lost an arm. You're just a boy, so I went easy on you. This time. Chances are by your reaction that I hit your liver pretty well, so you should probably leave here and get that checked out. Don't want to piss blood in front of all the ladies, do you?" she noted menacingly, standing up and moving into the mostly empty kitchen. Amber ignored the couple making out beside the fridge and got herself a glass of tap water.

_Why did he think he could do that? Don't girls usually react badly? Was it just a way to get back at me for telling him to go away? Is he really that stupid? What the hell...I should have beaten the shit out of him, If I had my...I think I need some fresh air, I need to calm down._

* * *

The pond outside was just the calming influence she needed. She'd received the odd stare or remark as she made her way back through the dancing crowd and out into the backyard. Not words that were foreign to her, but ones that usually were spoken on a job rather than at a party with friends. It was an unpleasant intrusion, dampening her mood even more.

_Where are those girls, anyway? They said they'd be around, but I haven't seen any of them all night since we got here..._ she thought, perching herself on the edge of the small wooden dock, her feet swinging inches above the cool April waters. Amber looked around at the torch-lit yard, stealing glances at the other party-goers.

_They all look so happy. Aside from that one asshole, everyone's just been focused on having a good time. How often do these things happen? Are these people usually happy, or is this their escape from life?_ Amber took a sip from her glass and frowned. _What would they have to escape from? Their parents? School? I'd...I'd probably kill to have those things. Even if this is an escape, a way to feel belonging and forget their lives for a night, what do they need to forget? All these people are dressed pretty nice, and they look good, and this house is HUGE. Do they all have homes this big waiting for them? Even one a quarter this size would be amazing! A home..._

Amber took another glance behind her at the building, and she could imagine it in daylight, kids running across the yard, or jumping into the pond in the heat of summer. She could see adults sitting down on the bench by the back porch. She could smell dinner wafting in from the back door. The house, as changed and mutated as it was now, held life. _A home...I wonder how many of them had to move every year or two, how many got to stay in their house for long enough that it became their home? How did they live? What hard shit did they have to go through?_ She took another drink of water and crashed the cup down beside her, fortunately doing no damage.

_I've lost a sister, lost friends, starved and been beaten nearly to death, what did they have to go through? What did they do to earn what they have? It...it's not fair!_ She thought, slumping down and hugging her knees together. _It's just not fair. And it...it's so different than anything I've ever had. Could Mel and I have ever really had this? Would we really want to? What were we even aiming for? Would we end up wanting to lose ourself in some party to get away from it, after all our struggles? I...Christ, I have no idea. My head's just a mess._

Footsteps from behind her sent those thoughts to the periphery as she turned her head and saw Faridah's blonde friend from the pool, carrying a small bottle. Amber craned her neck slightly, staring up at the tall blonde, and smiled.

"I saw you sitting out here by your lonesome and figured I'd visit." Katie said, sitting down cross legged beside her. "Party not treating you well?"

Amber shook her head and stared down into the water. "It's been fun, kind of. Just...ended up letting myself think too much I guess. I kinda needed space from the dance floor, but I probably shouldn't let myself sit out here too long, I'll go crazy."

Katie let out an airy laugh and leaned in conspiratorially. "I hear you decked Chad Poirier in there." She whispered. Amber lowered her head, feeling a little bad for blowing up like that. _Even if he deserved it..._

"Yeah...I'm sorry." She apologized softly. "It won't happen again, I promise."

"Well, I hear he slapped your ass when you turned him down...heck, half the people dancing heard it. I would have slapped him too." She said playfully.

Amber stifled a laugh at the notion of slapping a guy with an open hand, realizing that her measures for retaliation were probably different than Katie's. "Oh, I didn't slap him, his hands were protecting his face. I punched him in the liver, I think. I...kind of hope he pees blood. He was being all weird and then...I don't like being touched. Especially there, so..."

"That's probably why he was out vomiting in the trash a little while ago. You know, a lot of girls would have died to have Chad hit on them." Katie noted. Amber gave her a confused look at the confession.

"What? He was a jerk. He told me to turn around so he could stare at my butt again." Amber grumbled, taking another sip of water. _I can't believe he had the gall to say that..._

Katie laughed again and nudged Amber's arm lightly. "Oh come on, give yourself some credit! Your hips are out of this world, and your legs are damn fine. In that dress, on a dancefloor...I'm sure even straight girls were checking out your bum." She said, trying to give the brunette some confidence. Amber cracked a small smile and Katie cracked open her beer.

"He could have been nicer about it. Besides, I was nice enough when I told him I wasn't interested, he didn't need to slap me there. Anyway, that's over with now." Amber said, downing the last of her water. "Do parties like this happen a lot?" She knew she was fishing and getting a bit more serious, but she was dying to get some answers.

"Yeah, usually once a week, somewhere. At least, in this general group. More when summer rolls around, but during school, usually one on a Friday or Saturday night. Why?" Katie asked.

"Just wondering. I've never been to one of these before. Just wondering why they happen." Amber stated, trying to be as straight as possible with what she said, restraining herself from rambling.

"What, not fun enough for you? Hah!" Katie laughed, before realizing Amber was being serious. "Oh...well, people like getting together and spending time with each other. Between school, work, studying, and being with parents, it can be hard to find time for friends. So...parties happen."

Amber nodded, letting the words sink in, but something didn't fit quite right. "Then...the drinking? Why is everyone getting drunk so much if they want to spend time together?"

"You don't get out much do you?" Katie looked at her with a mix of wariness and amusement. "Drinking...well, some people have a hard time opening up and letting loose. Drinking can help people just relax and have a good time. Not everyone wants or needs to, but it's pretty common. In the end, it's to have fun, and I guess it can be nice to be with friends taking part in something together, like drinking games."

"So people do all this just to have fun and spend time with friends?" Amber asked, incredulously._ I thought there'd be more to it than that._

"You say that as if it's a big mystery. But yeah, I mean, friends are a second family in a way. Why not rig your home to welcome them all every once in a while?" the blonde said with a smile. Amber looked back toward the house and considered her stance.

_So this is kind of a family hanging out with each other? Me and Mel would get together in the park...they're just doing it here because they have the option, because they want their friends to feel at home? There's nothing wrong with that...they just have things I don't, but they do the same things, in the end. And they like dancing, so it would make sense that they'd do what they did to part of the house. And they're not blood family, so...sure, some of them might like each other like that, and this would probably be more comfortable than a club downtown...they're not disrespecting their family, they're just...well, I don't know. But maybe they just see family differently because they have so much of it, maybe they just take it for granted. Maybe I can be frustrated about that, but they're not really doing anything wrong, they're just...they don't know what it's like to be without, and that's good. I wouldn't want someone to feel that just because I'm a little selfish at times and a little envious. I have friends, I...have family too. Just a different kind, and a different take on it..._

"Yeah..." Amber's words were nearly whispers at first. "Yeah, I think I can understand that. I just haven't really had the chance to learn this stuff before. My life is really different compared to...this. I mean, when I left the skycar, I couldn't shake the feeling this was a strip club."

"A what?!" Katie asked, bursting out into a fit of laughter. Amber waited patiently, a grin plastered on her face, waiting for the blonde to calm down enough. "You've never been to a party, but you've been to a strip club? You're...wow. That's kind of funny! Wait...you don't dance there do you? Because your legs look really strong and..."

"No, no, I...no!" Amber blurted out, more than a little flustered by the association. "No, I had to stop by a few on my...delivery job."

"Haha, alright. You're a minor anyway, so that would be kind of gross. Still, a killer way to make money during college. So, I hear you play an instrument!" Katie announced, excitedly. "What do you play?"

* * *

The two girls conversed along the water's edge for a while, laughing at Katie's jokes. They talked about their musical training, Katie offering tips for the brunette to follow were she to want to learn to play by ear, or sing along to music. Amber liked the girl, found her to be a breath of fresh air and full of answers.

Amber headed from the dance floor to the kitchen, having promised Katie a dance when she'd had another small drink of water. Her eyes caught sight of Faridah, leaning against the doorframe between the kitchen and the lobby, standing close to a taller guy, the conversation soft and seemingly intimate. She smiled, pleased that her friend was having a good time, and scanned the nearly empty cabinets for a glass.

_I'm happy she's maybe found someone. She's a pretty good person, she deserves someone nice._ She thought, finally finding a glass, standing on her tip toes to reach it. Amber wasn't a small girl, standing five foot seven, but she was just an inch or two shy of the sole remaining glass. _Just a bit further..._ She stretched her whole body as much as she could, her right arm pulled skyward toward the top shelf until she noticed another arm reach over her, grabbing it instead. Amber nearly stumbled over in surprise, a pair of arms catching her between her armpits, a familiar voice laughing behind her.

"Looked like you were having a little trouble." Faridah said, letting Amber go before rustling her curls. "You could have asked, you know." Faridah laughed and moved towards the guy who was standing there looking amused. Amber let her shoulders slump in mock defeat.

"But I was so close..." she said yearningly, smiling at Faridah's friend as she took the glass he was offering. "Thank you. You two looked busy, is all. Didn't want to interrupt."

He chuckled softly. "No problem. Gotta put this height to use sometimes." Faridah hugged him around his waist and smiled at the brunette.

"So how are you liking the party? Aside from the scuffle and all." The raven haired girl asked cheekily. Amber rolled her eyes at how familiar the event had become.

"Is everyone aware I punched that guy? Everyone seemed too busy dancing to care. If I knew it would have caused trouble I would have held back...maybe." Amber muttered, casting her eyes toward the living room -turned-dancefloor.

"Don't worry about it. He's cute, but he's a jerk when he's drunk. Besides, all the girls who normally fawn over him are probably happy you spared his face, anyway." Faridah mentioned. "So? Are you having a good time?"

"Well, it's been alright, yeah. Definitely interesting, and still kind of weird. Still not sure if I'm having a good time, but dancing's fun. I met Katie, she's fun." Amber noted, trying to give as much thought to the question as possible. "I don't know. I think I've had fun, I guess. People called me some names or whatever, but I kind of expected that some people here would be jerks, so...and I'm still kind of lost on what people expect from me, but it's been alright. I'm managing."

"Good! I was worried for a bit, but I saw you dancing earlier and you seemed fine, so I let you be. It's such a relief...anyway, me and Isaac are heading over there to dance." Faridah gushed, leading the tall sandy blonde by the hand.

"Great, I gotta get back in there, I promised Katie a dance." Amber said, smiling at the pair. Faridah stopped at the lip of the doors.

"Just tell her no touching if you want. She can be a little grabby...make that a lot grabby!" the raven hired girl laughed, twirling around the corner onto the dance floor. Amber smiled and poured herself a small glass of water. _All this thinking and dancing makes me thirsty...So Katie's a hands on kind of girl? Hrm, I guess I should have seen that coming._ She thought, mulling over how comfortable she'd be with that as she took a gulp of water_. I...I'm just not sure I'm ready for that. Not this quickly._

Amber looked back to the dance floor and downed the rest of her water. _Well, I could still use a good dance._

* * *

_***Trigger Warning for later in this section, implied sexual assault attempt***_

* * *

Katie was the queen of silly dances, Amber decided. The two had initially danced as normal, and as Amber had asked, but Katie stopped the both of them after about a half hour to discuss dancing strategy. Amber shook her head, recalling the blonde's lessons on how to dance around different kinds of people. Amber's dance, according to Katie, was a bit too physical to do alone, which Amber reluctantly agreed with. _I did feel kind of empty out there, like something was missing, even though I was enjoying myself. That said, Katie's dances were..._ Amber thought of the girl's multitude of funny dances to do when just being goofs with friends, dances to do at certain kinds of music concerts, and dances for flirting with guys and girls. _Those ones were...a little...steamy. I don't think I could ever ever ever do any of those. _

Katie had just left Amber to go send a message to someone, leaving Amber to test out some of the dances on her own. Some were a bit too exuberant for her liking, though some were silly and let her move along to the music still. _In the end, that's the important part. Even if this music's a bit too loud and drowns out my own heartbeat, I still think it's fun_.

Amber stood in the midst of the crowd, trying to figure out what dance to practice next when she saw Heather off in the distance, appearing dazed and clumsily being led upstairs by a larger man whose features she couldn't make out due to his longish hair obscuring them as they ascended. _I have a bad feeling about this...I...I've seen that look before when I'd visit the Reds. I mean, she could just be drunk, and there seem to be a lot of different kinds of drunks, but she looked really out of it. Drugged, maybe. Maybe...I should play it safe and make sure she's alright...Something just doesn't feel right..._ Amber thought to herself, looking back and forth from the stairs to Katie, before squeezing her way out of the pack to the blonde.

"Katie, does Heather do drugs? Or drink so much she can barely stand?" she asked the blonde firmly. _I don't know Heather real well, but...Christ..._

Katie looked up from her omni-tool in confusion. "Uh, no drugs that I know of. I tried red sand once and she was really against it, and she usually just has a beer or two. Why?"

Amber bit her lip and cursed under her breath, turning toward the stairs. "I saw her looking totally out of it, being basically dragged upstairs by some dude. Get Faridah and meet me upstairs!"

She darted around the large pack of dancers and made her way upstairs, her steps softening as she neared the second floor. The music still carried up to the second floor, but the higher notes were muted, fortunately. Amber crept down the hall and listened for any sounds. _Sounds I don't exactly want to hear, and I could real easily just walk into some couple having sex, I guess. Still, worth the risk._

Halfway down the hall she swore she heard a tearing sound and muffled voices. The only nearby door was closed, leaving her with the quandary of whether or not to barge in. _Every second I waste could be putting her in more danger so...time to brush up on my acting skills._

Amber casually turned the doorknob and walked into the dark room, her face a mask of surprise. "Oh, this doesn't seem to be the washroom." She remarked shyly, taking in her surroundings as quickly and discreetly as she could manage. _Two guys and what looks to be a girl pressed up against the wall. Maybe I should go wait for backup on this one..._

As she went to pull back into the hall, a rough hand from beside her grabbed her shoulder. _A third person... fuck. You're better than this, you've been taught about this. _Amber remained rigid and forced out a scared yelp as the guy shoved further into the room and shut the door. She would have smiled if it wouldn't have broken her facade. _Should have knocked me out, asshole. Now you're playing my game_.

Amber surveyed her surroundings better, taking note of any obstacle she could use to her advantage, any angle she could manipulate, her body shaking and appearing to look around nervously in hopes the group wouldn't catch on to her efforts. _Hell, they're just a bunch of highschoolers, they're not mercs or even gang members, probably. Still, they outnumber you and the room is cramped, that plays in their favour. Think!_

Her eyes caught a hold onto Heather and she froze for a moment. The slender girl looked dazed, but more than a little scared; a man's hand held her by the throat and her dress had been ripped down the middle and discarded. It took a moment for the situation to truly sink in. _This is really happening. No, no...I won't let them do this..._

Amber heard the man behind her take a step toward her, and she sprung into action. _It's dark, so I won't be able to be precise..._she thought, widening her spin and sliding her foot out slightly on the hardwood floor. The man moved forward and reached out to her but she ducked as she finished her spin, throwing an uppercut into his midsection with as much force as she could muster, doubling him over momentarily. Amber followed up with a stiff elbow the side of the head before spinning away from the guy toward the other unoccupied taller, lankier guy who was slowly and cautiously approaching her.

"You know, I really get tired of it always being guys that I need to get in fights with. Or, more specifically, really stupid guys. Sometimes it'd be nice for some diversity, you know?" Amber said teasingly, hoping her taunt would work. The guy took another step forward, and she noticed off behind him that the other guy had dropped Heather and was making his way around the bed toward her as well.

The taller guy in front of her rushed forward at her, hoping to tackle her to the ground, but she slipped to the side and thrust her knee out, catching him in the midsection like his other fallen comrade, letting her sharply bring up her elbow to his jaw, levelling him out. She heard boots scuff the floor behind her, forcing her to pivot quickly and throw out a kick; her foot missing by an inch or two, sending her off balance for a moment, all that was needed for the downed man to trip her. Amber stumbled toward the bed, bouncing off of it into a haymaker from the man who had brought Heather up initially.

She tumbled back, her body contorting from the force and crashed into a dresser, which her arms immediately took hold of in order to keep stable. The burly long haired man strode purposefully toward her as the downed man struggled to get to his feet. _ I don't want to damage the house but...fuck it, I'm not going to get killed over this. _

Amber focused and threw out a mass effect field at the larger man, sending him flying across the room and into the side of a large armoire, then leapt at the rising man before her. He struggled as she latched onto him, but quickly faltered as she wrapped an arm around his neck, his body soon limp. She looked over at the two other downed men. _The one I elbowed isn't getting up. The bigger guy looks pretty hurt. Good._

She unwrapped herself from the unconscious form, stepped over the downed, bleeding taller man, and stood in front of the burly man, who was shaking as he tried to get up. He was bleeding heavily from somewhere near the top of his head, she could see the blood streaming down his face, could hear it drip onto the floor.

"Like to drug people, huh?" she asked calmly, winding up her leg and kicking him with full force in the ribs, sending him tumbling to the floor again. She strode over to him and turned him on his back before straddling his waist.

"Like to bully people, force yourself on people who trusted you'd be a good enough person to have some humanity?" she asked again before leaning in close to his face, her voice thick with rage. "I will hurt you for this."

She reeled back and crashed her fist into his face, splintering his nose, sending blood gushing all over him and her fist. She reeled back again and looked up at Heather, curled up in the corner. She felt her fist again collide with his face as her anger overtook her. _Did you know her? Were you friends with her? Did she trust you, or any of these assholes? Why?_

She threw another punch into the side of his ribs this time, quickly following up with another one that audibly crunched something of his and had him unconsciously coughing up blood. _Why?_ She pulled his bleeding, unconscious head up off the floor by the hair and leaned in toward it.

"Why?" she pleaded, slamming his head down and getting off of him in disgust. Amber slowly made her way over to Heather and knelt in front of her. In the sky-car, the girl had been intense, confident, and calm; the girl in front of her was none of those, staring aimlessly at the floor and shaking. _She still looks really drugged up, but she's so scared...Christ...this should never have happened..._

"Heather, can you hear me?" she whispered, as she sent Faridah a brief message on her omni-tool. Heather looked up at her, eyes glistening with tears. "Can you stand up? Nod if yes."

Heather sat there shaking without nodding. _I'm not sure she would be okay with being touched, but..._

"Can you take my hand? I won't hurt you. It's Amber, Faridah's friend." Amber whispered, feeling a lump grow in the back of her throat. _Why?_ "I just want to get you away from here. Please let me get you out of here to a safe place. They won't hurt you anymore. I promise."

The short haired brunette stared at her for a moment before warily lifting her shaking hand closer to Amber's. The younger girl finished the contact, gently taking hold of the shaking hand, waiting to see if Heather would reconsider. After a few moments Amber nodded and slowly rose up, her friend taking a little longer to find her feet. Her omni-tool chimed and she could hear footsteps as they neared the door. Faridah, Katie and Isaac stood in the middle of the hall as the two exited, likely shocked, but Amber didn't have time for it. She knew what she needed to do. _Or at least, I think I do._

"Where's the nearest washroom?" she asked the trio gently, trying not to alarm the shaking girl beside her. Faridah stepped forward to hug Heather, startling Heather, who shifted behind Amber quickly. Amber leaned toward the dejected older girl and gave her an apologetic smile.

"She's been drugged so much she barely knows where she is, and she's really anxious right now. We need a washroom. Can you get Katie to get your skycar ready?" Amber's voice was soft, but the words spilled out quickly. Faridah nodded at Amber, and then to Katie, who ran off down the stairs reluctantly.

Amber turned to the last remaining person in the group. "Isaac, I need you to find something heavy to put in front of the door I just came out of. It opens out into the hallway, and there's a chance one of the guys inside will wake up and want out. Maybe they'll have other friends in the party looking for them. Keep people away from this room if you can...hell, keep them off this floor if you can. Try not to be obvious about it if it's possible." She said firmly, pausing as he seemed to tense up at the list of duties. "I know it's a lot, and I'll help too, I just need to get cleaned up first. I'll be a few minutes, and chances are we'll be fine. We only need a few minutes. Buy us that time...you can do it."

"I don't even know what's going on." He said uneasily, looking past her toward the door. "Who's in there?"

Amber closed the distance to him and looked up at him, her neck craning to maintain eye contact. "People who want to hurt a good friend of Faridah's, now are you going to help keep her safe or not?" Her eyes blazed as she felt her body vibrating with anger. _I don't need this, not now._

He sheepishly nodded and ran off down the hall. Faridah led them to a secluded ensuite bathroom and locked the door behind them. Amber gently led Heather over toward the toilet and sat her down.

"Are you alright?" she heard from beside her, as she checked the shaking girl over carefully.

"She's not really up to answering right now, Faridah." Amber stated softly, kneeling to check for bruises on the girl's legs.

"I meant you. Are you hurt?" Amber turned her head lazily to the raven haired girl, then back to Heather.

"Your friend nearly got raped, I don't think it matters much if I'm fine..." she noted quietly and she stood up and felt Heather squeeze her hand, bringing a smile to her face. "But I'm fine. Just a bit shaken up. I can take a punch, I just...why would someone..." She sighed and grabbed a washcloth, proceeding to clean the blood from her hands and face.

"What should we do? I...I don't know what to do." Faridah stammered, grabbing another cloth and wiping the blood off that Amber couldn't reach.

When she was satisfied, Amber placed the cloth into the sink and knelt to eye level with Heather. "I need to let go of your hand for a second, but I'm still here." Amber noticed the older girl was getting a little more aware and hoped her plan would work. The girl dropped her head slightly and loosened her grip.

"Fari?" she whispered, surprising Amber and bringing the raven-haired girl immediately to Heather's side. Amber took advantage of the distraction and moved away from the pair. She stepped into the bath and closed the curtains, trying to keep a hold of the willpower she'd felt up until this point. Slowly, she unzipped her dress and hung it on the towel rack, grabbing the largest nearby towel to wrap around herself. _So what if people see my back a little bit? Let them...it...it means nothing. It means nothing. It means nothing... _she thought, continuing the mantra as she wrapped the cloth around her and stepped out from behind the curtains, offering the dress to Faridah.

"Help her into it. Please. Someone might have called the cops and we need to get her home." Amber said softly, looking straight at the bathroom door. She could feel Faridah's gaze boring into her, and after a few seconds she willed herself to face her. "Please." She pleaded, turning her gaze back to the door. _Please let this night be over soon_. She felt the dress taken from her hand and let out a relieved sigh.

After a minute or so of rustling fabric, she felt a hand on her shoulder_. It's time..._ she realized, opening the door and leading the two girls out. _There's no going back...but you'll be fine...it means nothing..._

As they left the room, she spotted Isaac, who had placed a small chest in front of the door. _That'll have to do, I guess... _she thought as she walked by, thanking him and signalling him to follow. Amber stopped at the stairs and turned to Faridah, who was looking straight at her, concern etched on her face. "We take her out the back door and hope we don't run into any trouble. Katie's ready with the car?" she voice was quiet but resolute, eliciting a nod from Faridah and a delayed nod from Heather. Amber turned her head to the short haired brunette and smiled. "We'll get you home, I promise."

Amber slowly led them down the stairs, keeping her eyes on the crowd warily. _Who knows if those guys had others looking out for them...I'd like more backup, but... _she thought, an approaching girl catching her attention.

"What happened to your clothes?" she asked, confusedly as Amber waved Faridah, Isaac and Heather through the back door and turned to follow.

"Someone bled all over them, I guess. Can't go walking around like a murder victim, can I?" Amber 's attempted joke was far too rigid to be believable, she knew, but the girl backed off nonetheless.

"Fucking weird..." she heard muttered behind her as she left the building. "Look at those...Holy shit, Greg, you have to see this girl's scars!" Amber shook her head, trying to ease the tension building in her body and she turned the corner and caught up with the trio. As they walked toward the waiting skycar, more and more crowded by the windows, staring at them, muttering muffled words behind the panes of glass that she didn't care to focus on. _So much for hoping they'd be decent about it. Fuck. Fuck them, but at least my plan worked._

Katie had opened the Skycar doors and ushered Faridah and Heather in quickly. Amber leaned in, her hand bracing on the frame of the car.

"Heather, will you be fine with Faridah tonight, or do you want me to keep watch for you?" Amber asked, swallowing the lump that had grown in her throat. "Nod if you're fine with Faridah, please..."

Heather paused for a moment and nodded. Amber leaned out of the vehicle and stood outside it, motioning for Isaac to fill the sole backseat.

"Amber, what are you doing?" Faridah growled at her, leaning to get a better look at the young brunette. "You're coming with us."

Amber shook her head. "No, I'm not. I really hurt those guys in there. One of them really badly. I don't want this to reach Heather, it's best that I'm the target. No one knows me, everyone was keyed in on me. If this goes bad, it goes back to me, not any of you. I was seen earlier beating a guy up, any one of you get called on by some investigators...say I forced you to help. It's believable. So go, get her to safety, I'll call my usual ride." Amber finished, walking away from the skycar toward the nearby woodland. _There's a field about a kilometre or two away. I should be safe to call from there._

"You need to come with us." Faridah called out, bringing Amber to face them again.

"Take care of her!" she yelled out, jogging off into the woods. She hoped that Heather would be fine in Faridah's care. She hoped that Heather wouldn't remember the night at all, and would wake up the same as how she was earlier on the trip up. She hoped that no one would link the violence at the party to any of Faridah, Heather, or even Isaac. She hoped she did enough to keep her friends safe to keep their lives on a steady course. As she ran out of the forest and into the field, catching a wonderful view of the starry sky above her, she felt hope was all she had, and for once it was enough.

* * *

**A/N: Welp, just typed about 7k words today, setting a personal record. Wow! This chapter just kept going, like there wasn't an end in sight. I had a few goals in this chapter and it seemed every time I wanted to cut down (and I almost never cut down) I would be sacrificing some bits that helped show how Amber's mindset was at, which I felt was a big part of the chapter. The main part, really. So...I'm sorry it was so tremendously long...and so much dialogue! I'm scared it came across wooden, but...I don't know. I could think of other ways to say what the characters wanted to say. So...I left it as is. I'm sorry if this chapter takes a while to read, I tried to break it into digestible portions as best I could.**

**School starts for me on Friday, and...well, I won't finish the story by then, but I might have another chapter out depending on if an old friend decides to hang out on Friday after class or not. Still, I'll be writing more tomorrow, likely. I can see the finish line, I'm determined to get this arc done! :D Especially while I have time to write.**

**So thank you everyone for reading and reviewing and alerting and favouriting :D 100k words and 3k visits! Absolutely not what I thought would happen, writing thhe first chapter back in May. Just did not expect this...Wow! So thank you everyone for the support, I hope you enjoy the chapter :) Have a good week! Now off to bed for me, I need to wake up at 6AM...**


	18. Chapter 18

Amber slumped down onto her stool, feeling both wired and exhausted as she loaded up the holo-piano VI and searched through her list of sheet music. Settling on one of her training songs, 'Radio Ballet', she put her fingers to work. Her instrument never quite felt proper, never felt like it had the right weight under it compared to Joel's, but it was familiar enough to play and let the music bring peace to her. On any other night, perhaps it would have worked. Her fingers danced across the keys angrily, her pace picking up as she blew through the song, hitting every note with precision and power.

She quit out soon after, spinning off her stool and charging over to her dresser. _Why am I so worked up, anyway? They're safe…they'll be fine…I should be letting this go and getting some rest. I…_ she thought, looking down and realized she'd clenched her fists. _I need to calm down…_

Amber placed a hand on her dresser and leaned against it, thoughts spiraling through her mind like a maelstrom, unable to grasp any of them to make sense of the mess. She shook her head and reluctantly grabbed her gym equipment. _Better this than standing around doing nothing while my head spins_.

The walk to the gym was quick, and at this time of night, no one was around. _Not that many people use it. It's almost always empty….isn't it a little big for just one person to regularly use it? Hrm._ She thought, quickly changing and making her way over to the heavy bag in the far corner of the room. Amber leant down and picked up the ragged boxing gloves, slipping them on. _They're always a little big, I don't get why I can't get a smaller pair. I've seen other pairs when I pass the storage checkout, but…whatever. These will do for now._

She took her stance in front of the large leather bag and threw out a quick jab. _What do I even want out of this, anyway? _She followed it up with another swift right straight up top and a left hook to the lower half of the bag. _I'm a shit puncher, and I shouldn't feel like I have to beat anything up, but…fuck._ She threw a heavy right cross and two quick uppercuts, the feel of the impacts bringing a faint grin to her face. _Why am I this upset? My body feels like it's boiling!_ She threw a hard right hook down low and a stiff left straight as the bag reeled back in her direction. _My body…_

The slight sway of the bag swung forward and she caught it, instinctively, as her mind locked in place. _Christ, I'm so dense sometimes!_ She let the bag go and threw her entire body into a crushing right hook, then took a few steps away from the bag. _That's really the whole point of this…of what happened tonight…fuck, I should have just taken a second to THINK! _She spun around and caught the still swinging bag with a heavy left kick, and followed it up with a short knee as it returned_. I made the choice to come here, but I can regret that. They've been breaking me down and building me up this whole time, training my body. Not me, but my body._ Amber threw a left cross and a right kick to the middle of the bag, her pace increasing as her thoughts cleared more and more.

_But I'm more than my body!_ She thought, throwing a number of quick jabs to the bag, following it with a heavy knee. _And so is Heather, goddamnit, but she didn't ask for that!_ Another stream of left jabs and mixed low kicks landed firm, sweat dripping down Amber's forehead. _Those guys are like these people here, they wanted her body, but they didn't care about her, how it would hurt her._ She sent another crushing right hook to the lower half of the bag, feeling the impact ripple through the gloves into her hands. _We're more than our bodies, damn it! I'm more than this…thing they've made me into…_ She threw out a strong right low kick and lunged forward at the bag slightly with an elbow_…And Heather's more than just a blow up doll, she's a person, with a life and with a future…She didn't deserve that at all! _She stepped back a little and met the swinging back with another hard right hook that sent a ripple of pain up to her shoulder. _Yeah, it's not fair that I've had to fight all my life, but she shouldn't have to, she doesn't know how! No one should have to!_

Amber took a few clumsy steps back and caught her breath, her shoulders slumped from exhaustion. _I've been through shit, I've been trying to show people, to really believe I'm more than just this blue power infused body, that I'm more than a poor starving orphan, that I'm a person too. I have more to offer, and I'm starting to believe that. _She gracelessly moved to the nearest bench and took a seat, wishing she had brought some water. _I don't want her to doubt herself like I have just because of this. I don't want it to break her. She…she can survive this like I've survived. I have to believe that I can get out of this intact, and that she can get out of this intact, but… we'll need some help. But we can do it. Mel's right…_

Amber made her way back to the change room sluggishly, wincing at the pain in her swollen right hand. _Got a little bit too much of a workout tonight, I guess…Hell, not just my fist, either. This has…been a wild night…_

* * *

Amber scanned through the local news stories on the extranet, scouring all the recent entries for anything regarding the party the previous night, but there were no mentions of any trouble as far as she knew. She closed down the terminal and walked down the corridor toward the music archives, hoping to find something new and exciting to listen to. As she rounded the corner toward the kiosk, she noticed a familiar form standing nearby, preoccupied with re-arranging the datapads on a shelf. _Hrm…well, maybe he won't notice me and I can listen to a bit of music before I break the bad news…_She slipped by him and sat on the comfortable leather chair, opening up the menu on the left arm of the chair.

As she sorted by decade and artist name, she noticed a tapping foot in her peripherals. _So much for that…_ she thought, glancing upward at Joel and giving him a big smile.

"Oh, hi! How's your day been, Joel?" Amber said, faking surprise as best she could. "Not too busy, I hope?" He frowned at her, his face stony in seriousness.

"Seems you're collecting injuries, lass. I take it our piano lesson today will be on hold?" he asked, a tinge of annoyance ringing through each word.

"Unless you have some great single hand techniques to teach me…yeah, it'll be a no go today." Amber replied apologetically, cradling her bandaged hand with the other. There was a minor fracture that would heal across the next few days, but it meant limited activity, and likely another non-piano session on her next library visit. Her revelations the previous night made up for it, but she still felt disappointed that she wouldn't be able to play and that she'd let Joel down. "But I'm sure we can think of something to do. Or I can sit here listening to music for a few hours, if that's easier for you."

"Well, I hope it gets better soon, you're missing out on some of my secret techniques and I won't lie, you're not getting any younger." He noted playfully, pulling up a chair beside her. "So how'd you do it, if you don't mind me asking?"

"Joel, I know you don't like hearing about it, so why are you asking?" she openly wondered, shooting him a curious glance.

"Because, lass, normally when you're banged up, you're all silent and stone-faced. Today you look rather pleased with yourself, all things considered." Amber nodded at his words, not having realized she'd appeared like that in the past. _Well, Joel is the kind to notice that stuff, I guess…_

"I…um, I went to a party last night with some friends. It was mostly a good time, but I…kind of got in a fight or two." She said, Joel's nod signaling her to continue. "One was a creep who touched my butt, so I kind of punched him in the liver, I think."

"That's pretty specific." He noted thoughtfully. "And the other?"

"One of my friends…well, there were these three colossal jerks. They got a single shot on me…" she said, pointing to her blackened eye. "And I made sure they wouldn't get up for a while. Maybe a long time, in one case."

Joel sat there and mulled over her words for a bit before turning to her. "Lass, you know I worry about you. Do you feel you did the right thing?" he asked, simply. Amber slumped forward in her chair, feeling a little uncomfortable by his question.

"Well, the first guy…I probably could have just let him go with a barrage of insults instead of hitting him, but…it's my body. I don't want anyone else to feel they have the right to touch me like that without some kind of consequence, so…I probably could have handled it differently, more maturely, but I'm alright with what I did. I needed to send a message that it wasn't okay, because I was the new girl at the party and others might have tried that if I let him go without doing anything." She reasoned, her brow furrowed as she thought of her actions and other possible avenues. "As for the three guys…I did what was necessary. They tried to hurt me and…I needed to make sure everyone who needed to be safe was safe, so I knocked them out. Still, this one guy…I really mauled him. I should have stopped when he went out, but I didn't, and I feel a little bad for that but… he was a horrible person. He did a terrible thing and I wasn't going to let him walk away. So…yeah, I think I did the right thing, for the most part. I'm not perfect."

"I can understand, child. I'm glad you regretted the excess…remember, everyone can be redeemed. Even the worst of us have some good left, it can be salvaged. Remember that." He noted firmly, eliciting a nod from Amber.

"I know. I've been doing a lot of thinking, lately. Just… trying to wrap my mind around things. It's led me to weird conclusions, and I'm not sure what to do with them." Amber confessed, looking directly at her older mentor.

"Well, I have time today, lass. If you need an ear, I'll gladly help." Joel said, nodding.

"Well, I mean, I've been through a lot of crap in my life, right? For a while I was kind of angry about it. I just wanted to get me and Mel out to some colony and have a good life. Thing is, I'm not sure that exists like I thought it did. I can't just forget what I've been through…it isn't all that I am, but I've gone through it and it's helped make me…well, me. All these 'normal' people haven't had that…and that's one of the only differences I can find in us anymore. I've lived through something they haven't, and they've lived through things I haven't. But… I can't ever experience what they have, I'll never grow up with my own parents, I'll never have childhood memories of a real home. These other people though, they can go through the kind of stuff I have, but they haven't."

Amber took a deep breath and worked to gather the thoughts that had filled her mind all morning, thoughts that had ravaged her mind the previous night. Joel laid a hand on Amber's knee and gave a squeeze_. It's nice that I can vent like this to someone…I'm glad he's been here for me, for Mel, for so long._

"The thing is…I have family now. It might not be the same as theirs, but I think it's good enough. I really do. And…I realize that I can't shoulder every burden that my family has, that I can't take the hurt away from everyone. I can't do that, but I still want to help however I can, however's best. I've been though some really bad stuff, I've grieved for a dead sister, and I don't want anyone else to go through that. That's what I've realized…all these people are just like me in a lot of ways, they're just a little different, and it's good that they don't have this shit following them around all their lives. I don't want that for them, and I want to help people like me overcome it. I don't want to have to live that crap for them, because I don't want to,…I just want to try and make sure that less of that shit happens. Am I…am I just trading a bunch of smaller burdens for a big burden? I mean, I want to do this, not just for everyone else, because I need to know that I can be better, that I can make a difference…that I can be more than the shit following me around. I figure if I can help others with that, they can help me, in a way. Everyone wins." Amber finished, sinking back into the comfortable chair, sighing.

Joel shifted his chair to face her and leaned forward a little. "Lass, a wise man once said 'she who aspires to kindness can do no wrong.' You want to help others, and that's wonderful. You're also aware of the toll it can take on you, so you hopefully won't get so overwhelmed by it. The only problem is that what you want to fix isn't fixable. There will always be pain and loss, child. You can make the galaxy a brighter place, but there will still be shadows."

Amber nodded. "That's the thing, I'm a little worried having something like that on my back will just be too exhausting, but…last night I saw a lot of people having fun, relaxing, being carefree for a night. I want to protect that, I want everyone to have that opportunity, for it to be within reach. I just don't know how I could do that…I've thought of being a cop, but I'm not sure I'd have much work out on the colonies, and being one here on Earth…I'd be worried that I'd get in and any positive stuff I do is buried by how shitty the police are here. There's so much horrible stuff here that I'd only ever be able to fix stuff instead of preventing anything. I want to make sure as few people have to suffer, not just help them once they've been hurt like I have. That's not what I want."

Joel was silent for a moment. "You could join the Alliance, Amber." The brunette shot him an unimpressed look, but he continued. "Hear me out. I know you're not impressed with them, but they'll train you. You'll see the colonies. You'll be helping prevent any damage to human planets and colonies, and you can work your way up the ladder, where you could decide where and how to help. It's not ideal, lass, but would get you away from whatever wretched life you've been stuck in."

Amber shook her head. "They're the ones who gave me this life, Joel. Most of my childhood was spent in their orphanages, they dropped the ball and haven't even cared enough to check up on me. They lied to me, Joel."

"That was just one man," he noted. "And I'm not saying you need to, but if you could forgive them and look into them more, maybe you will change your mind. You can make a real difference with them."

"Maybe…" Amber grumbled, "But for now, I…Heather?" Amber caught her breath midsentence at the sight of the short haired brunette wandering around aimlessly further down in the music archives.

"A friend?" Joel asked, before standing up and brushing a piece of lint off his sweater. Amber slowly nodded, in shock that the girl was in the library, having never seen her there before. "I'll let you see to her, I'm sure I can find some work to do around here." He smiled at the young brunette and strode off towards the video archives.

Amber took a moment to collect herself before sitting up off the chair and cautiously walking forward the older girl. Amber caught her eye from a few meters away, the girl bringing a hand to her mouth, stifling a gasp.

"Are you alright?" Heather asked worriedly, closing the distance between them. Amber nodded quickly, still visibly confused at the girl's presence.

"Yeah, just minor bruising and…I'm definitely fine." She replied, smiling and gesturing to a nearby couch. "What brings you all the way out here?" The two girls sat down, Amber making sure to put some space between her and Heather.

"I just wanted to say thanks." The girl said, her gaze soft and lacking the intensity from the skycar ride the day before. "I…can't really remember last night, but Faridah…well, you know how she is, putting her foot in her mouth when she's nervous."

Amber sighed and shook her head, glad that Heather didn't remember, but horrified that Faridah might have told her too much. "It's fine, really. I didn't want you to have to go through anything…that could have hurt you." _What the hell am I supposed to say without getting specific? Great job Amber. Could have hurt her? You idiot, it WOULD have. WOULD have hurt her. Ugh._

"Well, she said you were the reason I got home safe last night and…it didn't take a genius to figure things out when I woke up wearing your dress." She said quietly, moving her gaze to her feet. Amber shifted toward her and leaned into the girl's field of vision.

"I should have asked earlier, I'm such an idiot. Are you alright? Is there anything I can help with?" Amber asked, frustrated at herself for not bringing it up earlier.

Heather nodded. "I…like, I said, I can't remember much from last night. I was hallucinating a lot from what I do remember, and none of it really made sense, but when things started to get a little clearer, I remember my hands feeling wet and sticky, and someone holding them, and people were talking really quietly and I could barely hear anyone. I just…I wanted to thank you. I don't know what happened, but I know someone tried to hurt me, and you…" Heather's train of thought trailed off, her eyes looking slightly lost. Amber placed her good hand on the older girl's, bringing her focus back.

"It turns out I'm definitely more butch than you. Next time you see Faridah, you can rub that in her face." Amber smiled, trying to defuse the tension. Heather returned it with a grin and shook her head.

"I'm sorry, I was totally out of line, saying that, as much of a joke as I thought it was." She chuckled.

"Hard to take you seriously when you're laughing about it still." Amber said, grinning smugly. "So you came by here to say thanks? Not that I don't appreciate it, but…that's it?"

"Well, it would have been nice seeing you display some piano prowess, but it doesn't look like that's an option." Heather joked.

"Nah, unfortunately I hurt it punching a heavy bag last night after I got home." She noted, moving her good hand to cradle her bandaged one. "It'll be better in a few days. Good enough to play, at least."

"That's good, I was kind of worried it was from the party. I didn't want to be at fault for you having a broken hand." Heather said, her voice quiet again.

"You didn't do anything wrong, I promise you. You didn't choose to be in that situation. I'm really happy that you're fine enough to come out here and chat, but I don't want you blaming yourself for anything. This isn't on you." Amber noted softly.

"I…alright. I'll try not to think that way." Heather nodded and pulled out small handmade card and offered it to Amber, who accepted it, curious as to what it could be. "I know last night wasn't exactly perfect, and it's not like we can't maybe hang out between now and then, but I have a small get together planned for close friends on the first weekend of June. If you want, you can come. I understand if you wouldn't want to, but I promise that things will be easy-going, and…it'd be nice to have you there."

Amber smiled and nodded. _Another party? A small one though…and it is nice to be with friends. Maybe…_ "Will there be dancing?" she asked enthusiastically, eliciting a laugh from the older girl.

"I guess, yeah." She said between laughs. "Dancing will be an option. And I have a pool…and outside of family, I'm probably only inviting maybe a dozen people. It's usually a pretty nice time."

"Then I'll be there." Amber agreed as Heather stood up. "Heading out?"

"My mom's waiting downstairs. I told her I'd only be a little while." She said, doing her coat back up.

"Sounds good, though now I know you wouldn't have stayed for a recital." Amber laughed, getting to her feet as well. Heather rolled her eyes and started to turn away. "And Heather?"

The girl turned her head to face the younger girl. "Yes?"

Amber took a step forward and shrugged, feeling a little silly for what she was about to say. "If you ever feel anxious or unsafe and…well, if you don't want to call Faridah or Katie because they might have classes or a job or whatever the next day…"

"Thanks, Amber. I appreciate it." She smiled, before walking off down the stairs to the main level where her mother waited. Amber moved herself back to the comfortable leather chair, plopped on a headset, and played some of the old music that she'd taken to lately. _I think I've earned a bit of relaxation…_

* * *

_Today's been a good day, really, _Amber thought as she entered her room, making a beeline for her bed. _Got my mind set straight, found out Heather's doing better than expected…or at least it seems that way…and I tricked the cook into making me pizza! Delicious pepperoni pizza!_ She flopped backward onto her bed, splayed out in an unnatural and somewhat uncomfortable fashion, but she kept still, too busy thinking about her recent meal. _Maybe I can weasel in some mashed potatoes and chicken tomorrow…that would be really tasty…_

Rearranging her limbs to be more comfortable, she felt a leg graze something flimsy near the edge of the bed. Amber sat up, wondering what the thing could be until her eyes caught hold of it, bringing a smile to her face. _Well, maybe today will keep getting better!_

She leaned forward and grabbed the salvaged omni-tool from the other night, strapped it onto her other arm, and powered it up. _Let's see what there is to find…maybe nothing but who knows?_

As she slowly made her way through the menus, he heard her omni-tool beep, alerting her of a new message. _Huh,_ she thought, _I should probably be quick with this. What's ten minutes of searching going to hurt?_

Amber settled on the messages inbox and skimmed through_. Pizza order, message from a relative, another message from a relative, weekly lotto numbers, confirmation for an order for winter boots, a…few spam messages for some beach-side resort, and a…real estate unveiling? That's…weird. What the heck would a Reds grunt be doing with these in their inbox? _

She opened one of the beach resort ones first and scanned the text, her eyes stopping on a peculiar string of words. _Come see the beautiful sunsets spread across our vast sandy beaches, visit our travel office at 2825 Sheffield Rd, Ottawa, UNAS. Hrm, I don't recall that street…, let me punch in the directions on my omni…_Amber waited for the map to process the request and nearly jumped off the bed when she saw where it was. _Kal Tire? That building? What the shi…oh. Huh. They're not really subtle are they?_

Amber took another look at the picture; the sunset's light cast the sand in a peculiar shade of red. _So…I've been smuggling drugs to drop points for Viola's bosses or the Reds? Well…fuck. Still…good to know for later... Now, about this real estate bit…hey, these are both from the same sender…_

She scanned through the long article, mulling over the building specifications, its measurements, how many rooms it had, what type of plumbing, and whatnot, but something struck her as odd. Her hand kept scrolling up to the picture of the building, unable to place where she'd seen it before. _It's…I've seen it before. I…this is going to bug me. _She kept scrolling through the mountain of information, and started in on the description. _This twenty fourth century former hospice and retirement home stands proud on the western edge of Ottawa's downtown core, nestled between…wait a second that's…that's an orphanage I used to live in. I was, what, ten maybe? Stayed there for less than eight months because they tried to school us and feed us every day? Idiots, but…what's that doing…_

Amber skimmed the rest of the lengthy description and keyed in on a single word at the start of a new paragraph.

_Expose_

_No. No. NO…_ The display soon became unreadable as she felt her body shake, blood pounding through her skull as her face flushed with anger. Amber scooted backward until her back rested on the wall, hoping to steady her body, but it wasn't doing much good. _No, they can't. They CAN'T. Fuck, fuck FUCK!_

Amber shut down the Reds member's omni and opened the message function on hers. _I'm going to kill Viola if she's behind this, I fucking swear I will kill her if she harms whoever's in that building. I'll…_ Amber's eyes spotted a new message from Viola, titled 'Urgent'.

_FANCY THAT_, she thought, clicking the message and reading a small blurb about how she's demanding an explanation for what happened Saturday night. Amber typed out a simple reply and shut down her omni-tool.

"Five Minutes"

Amber slid off her bed, grabbed her coat and slipped on her shoes, storming out toward her instructor's home, hoping that she wasn't about to make a big mistake.

* * *

Viola heard the door open and promptly slam shut as she stood at her kitchen counter, stirring a cup of tea.

"You're late." She stated, her voice neutral. _She seems agitated tonight…maybe …_

"You have five minutes to explain!" the girl's voice yelled out, tromping footsteps making their way across the kitchen and closer to her. Viola slowly turned and took a sip of tea, looking at Amber curiously. The girl was holding out her arm, and soon a beep from her own omni-tool sounded. Viola opened the message and skimmed through it. _What is she making a fuss about now? _

"This has nothing to do with why I called you over." She said, giving her head a light shake. "In fact, it appears to have nothing to do with anything in particular."

The brunette stepped toward her and snatched the teacup from her violently as Viola went for another sip, splashing the hot liquid across the counter and the floor as she slammed it onto the counter. "You're running out of time, and I'm running out of fucking patience." Amber said, her voice a thick growl more than anything. "Was my sister not good enough for you?! The whole fucking orphanage not enough? Now you're doing it again? You sick, twisted piece of shit!" She grabbed Viola and pushed her hard against the counter, earning a wince from the older woman.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." She said, attempting to stay calm and disarm the situation. _Easier said than done with this one so riled up… _"If you would elaborate, perhaps I could actually provide some input."

"Like you have no idea, you think I'm some idiot orphan girl? Fuck you, I know about the next group of second exposure victims, and you're going to act like you don't know? That's rich… it's why I'm here!" the girl yelled, pressing Viola harder against the edge of the countertop, sending a dull pain in her lower back. _What? A…another second exposure test group? But I…_

The girl gave a final push and let go of Viola, instead pacing around the kitchen angrily, her eyes ablaze. "You and your fucking 'experiment' that killed a few hundred kids and left my sister to suffer through terminal cancer! You knew about it and you didn't say anything, and now you're not saying anything about this, well screw you! Are you going to let these kids starve to death too because the cancer in their throat has gotten so huge that they can't even swallow water?! Are you going to watch and record some fucking numbers as their tumours grow so large on their feet that every step they take is painful? That they have so much nerve damage from the exposure that their feet feel like they're on fire for the rest of their lives?! FUCK!" Viola could see the hot tears streaming down the girl's face, her eyes wild with rage, refusing to focus on any one thing. _I'll just let her rant and exhaust herself…perhaps airing her grievances will calm her to a point where we can discuss._

"You know, I actually trusted you a little. Back in that diner, I wanted to think that maybe someone was looking out for us, someone actually wanted to help us! Against the odds, I hoped just a little bit, even though I turned you down. Even after Mel's death, I hoped that maybe if I was more involved, if I got to see what you were doing, that it might make sense, that maybe you just really screwed up in the orphanage crash, and that you would have treated everyone if you could have, but now I know you wouldn't. I wanted to believe you fucked up and didn't get around to treating Mel in time, but you didn't! We're just replaceable bodies to test on, aren't we?! We're just street rats, thrown in the trash when you're done with us!" Amber seethed, turning her focus back to Viola. "Say something!" she shouted, again moving within inches of Viola.

Viola found herself frozen under the smoldering glare of the girl in front of her. _What can I even say to that?_

"I do not know anything about another second exposure test gr…" Viola started, before pausing as Amber spun and let out a wordless shout, her body intermittently wreathed in blue energy. She swallowed nervously and continued. "I know I have made mistakes in the past, terrible mistakes. The cost was not worth the sacrifice…"

"What sacrifices have YOU made, exactly?" Amber's words were staggered and icy, emerging from her grit teeth. "What the hell do you know about sacrifice, and what the cost is!? It's LIFE! That's all there IS!"

"I AM AWARE!" Viola exploded, losing control of her emotions momentarily. Amber merely stood in front of her, the bottled up rage and anguish seeping from her pores as she shook. "I have done this to provide future generations with a better outlook! I was the lead researcher in post-exposure illnesses, I helped create a medical response guideline, and I helped make the effective treatment common knowledge to the medical community! I am trying to find a way to cure the side-effects of element zero exposure, and I am aware of the blood on my hands. If a hundred need to die in order for women to safely be able to birth their children after eezo exposure, in order for the negative side-effects to be halted in utero, then that is the cost! That is the required sacrifice!"

Amber shook her head. "That's not your decision to make! Besides, that has nothing to do with second exposure cases like me. If you wanted to cure those things, you'd get back to that, you wouldn't be sending us to slaughter!"

Viola grabbed a hold of the countertop and lowered her head, trying to keep herself together. _She has a point, that's not why I started this…Faridah…_

"You're correct…I'm not studying that. Amber, would you do anything to keep your sister safe?" Viola asked, softly. "I made a promise a long time ago to keep someone safe, and this…this could ensure that. Surely, you can understand that."

The brunette stepped away and leaned on a nearby chair, facing away from Viola for the first time in the encounter. "I can understand that…but there are limits. If someone was attacking Mel, I would have defended her, absolutely. I wouldn't kill someone for no reason because I thought the person might threaten her, though. I'd steal to keep her fed, to keep her warm. Killing…that's drastic, and I don't want that blood on my hands. Keeping someone safe…Viola, how are you keeping anyone safe by this?" the girl's tone was more deliberate, more focused; still carrying a heavy undertone of anger, but it was controlled now.

"My sister was exposed to element zero in a lesser known accident, not long after the Singapore incident. No one was aware of what effect the dust would have on anyone, and my sister learned intimately of those side effects. There were complications during her pregnancy… she passed on when Faridah was born. If my sister's daughter…if Faridah is exposed to element zero again, then treatment is still experimental, there are too many unknowns. It is too dangerous, and as time passes, there will be more individuals who will be victims of a second exposure, or more. We need to sacrifice now if we want to save those in the future!" Viola ranted, focusing on the cracked teacup sitting on the counter. "I...I do not know of this other experiment, but I don't feel I can outright condemn it."

Amber once again turned to Viola, staring at her in disbelief. "So that's it? You're just going to let it happen, and here I'm pretending you had no fucking clue, which I still seriously doubt. You're letting it happen because you promised your sister to keep her daughter safe? You're slaughtering hundreds of orphans! You're in bed with some REALLY nasty people, who are hiring hits on people and are having me smuggle red sand, as I found out today too. Is that safe? Do you really think they're going to keep you safe, that they're going to keep her safe instead of holding her hostage if you decide to pack up and leave? You're a fucking idiot!"

The girl paced over to the sink and splashed some water on her face, water dripping from her curls as she raised her head to Viola in disgust. "You know, I gave you a fucking break. After you let them whip me…and remember, YOU whipped me too…I could have told that girl of yours everything, but I didn't. I could have let her know how neck deep you've been in all this dirty shit, but I wanted to keep your family intact, because I wasn't going to be like you. I wasn't going to steal that from her, or hell, even from you. She's a really nice girl and she doesn't deserve that shit lurking around her, ready to turn her into something like me. I'm a bit broken, but I'm not a huge fucking monster… if you're going to destroy even more lives, if you're giving that the thumbs up, then you're too far gone. She's not safe here with you anymore, and you'll be too blind to see them coming! Just…think!"

Viola paled at the thought, recalling Fiske's earlier threats. _Would he truly be so aggressive to harm me, to harm Faridah if I defected? I…_

Amber rounded the table and nearly passed the doorframe before halting suddenly. The girl turned her head to the darkened living room and, a look of concern spilling across her face, opened her mouth. "Faridah…how long have you been there?"

Viola once again froze, her niece slowly stepping out from behind the doorframe and into the kitchen, her hands cupped over her face and her body lightly shaking with sobs. Amber slumped down onto the nearest chair and stared at the floor in disbelief. _What has she done? _Viola thought, as her heart beat harder and faster.

"I asked you to explain what happened on saturday night, yet you came in here and aired this…mess of ours in front of her." Viola said icily, her glare firmly fixed on the brunette's face. "Who, exactly, is the monster here?"

Faridah slowly staggered in Viola's direction, lowering her hands to reveal a face that she felt could be the epitome of heartbreak. Viola felt a pit form in her stomach as her niece slowly approached her, the girl's eyes appearing to look through her toward the small window above the countertop. Viola opened her mouth to speak to her, to reassure her that the brunette's words were exaggerated, but she was interrupted by a fierce slap, sending her body reeling to the side, her arm grabbing onto the dishwasher to keep her on her feet.

"Fix it." Faridah choked out angrily, audibly sobbing as Viola's sight returned to her, vision still slightly blurry. "Tell me you can make it right. Tell me you can stop all of this."

Viola got herself upright and felt the side of her face, her skin tender and her jaw aching. "I…am not sure. I was hoping that down the line, when you were in college, that…"

"Viola." the brunette interjected; her tone was reeking of annoyance, but her words were softly spoken. "If they made this experiment without you, it probably means they don't need you. I…I think we're both going to be in trouble soon."

"That's absurd! I'm a premier researcher in…" Viola started again, before Faridah moved closer to her, giving her pause.

"Let. Her. Speak." Her niece demanded, her left hand clenching and unclenching, wiping her eyes with her other hand in a vain attempt to stem the tears. Viola thought to hug the girl, but decided it would be better not to. _She's desperate, but she's still angry at me, probably._ Viola nodded and decided to be patient.

"I was attacked by some thugs a few days ago, it's how I got this info. Thing is…they were Reds, dressed like Crows. I've been doing a lot of thinking these past days and…I've noticed that they've been stocking up on materials in the gym, in the storage room. That place used to be empty, but it's bursting at the seams now. There's at least fifty pairs of new boxing gloves in storage and…I'm just saying, I'm expendable if this second exposure thing happens. I was the test rat, a template for what to do, what not to do. They probably don't want to cure anything, Viola, they probably want to make more like me. They've….ever since I moved to that facility, I've been treated like a weapon more than a test subject to cure cancer, so tell me…who are we dealing with?" Amber finished, her question hanging in the air, the subtle anxiety in the girl's voice casting tension into the small area. Viola closed her eyes, feeling the pit in her core grow substantially.

"They…their code name is Cerberus." Viola said quietly. "I do not know very much about them, but they approached me with an offer a few years ago. They had made the Alliance coordinator for their biotics program resign quietly, and apparently had ways of letting me have full control of the program. I…I wasn't happy with how the Alliance was handling their training, as their methods were not sound and were unnecessarily cruel." Viola stated, hearing Amber scoff at the last sentence. "I accepted their offer on the grounds that I would have full oversight of the project and the resources required to perform my experiment. They simply seemed like an organized corporation, but it escalated quickly into appearing more like a cartel. And then into something much more dangerous. These people are…not good people. I should not have trusted them so readily."

"So if we're going to run from Cerberus, we'll need something as big as them…fuck me." Amber said, shaking her head.

"C-could we ask the president of UNAS to help, or some other government? Witness protection?" Faridah asked, the fear evident in her voice. Viola frowned at her niece's distress.

"I believe they have friends in the government who would undermine any help they would offer." Viola stated, with regret.

"I have an idea, but it's really far-fetched and I'm not sure if it'll work." Amber grumbled, appearing disgruntled at the mere thought of whatever she was considering. The two turned to face her and nodded for her to continue. Amber let out a sigh and stood up. "I…there was this Alliance guy that came and visited me and Mel in the hospital a few times. Tried to take us to safety, promised us shelter from…well, I assume they knew it was Cerberus, but it wouldn't have meant anything to me back then. Anyway, I've done some reading on him lately…he's a big shot Alliance hero or something, and probably has friends in high places. He hasn't gotten a hold of me in a long time, so I think he's probably forgotten about me, but…it's worth a shot. He owes me, I figure, and even if this group has people in the Alliance, it's probably our best shot. If anyone can help, if anyone's big enough, it's those guys."

Viola nodded slowly. "I fear that if I stopped blocking Alliance transmissions, and stopped faking your enrolment at their academy, that Fiske would probably catch onto our plan."

Amber stared at Viola, her glare getting more severe by the second as she clued in. "I'll…forgive you for that right now but I swear you'll make up for it later. Anyway, I have a way to get a hold of him. You're right, you can't be inconsistent with blocking whatever they want you to. We need to be silent about this, we need to be patient. We have until around…the end of August to get our shit in order."

Faridah nodded at Amber and turned to her aunt, Viola unsure if her voice was shaking with rage or from worry. _It's hard to tell at times, with her._ "We should invite Amber over for dinner every Friday, that way she can let us know if there's anything new to consider."

"That might work, but it might raise eyebrows. Still, if we get together enough and nothing changes, they'll probably chalk it up to me and Faridah getting closer since the party. Maybe invite Katie or Heather as well, at random, to kind of make it seem more natural. Faridah, you're graduating this year right?" Amber asked, eliciting a nod from the raven haired girl. "Then having friends over before moving away is a good idea, and probably expected. I don't think they're actively trying to kill us off yet, but if the chance comes up, they probably will. We shouldn't give them an excuse to feel paranoid."

Viola stepped away from her niece, toward Amber. "Well then, what do I tell them about Saturday, since they had me ask?"

"Tell them the truth." Amber said, straight faced. "I went to a party with your daughter, who I'm friends with. One of my new friends was hauled upstairs against her will and I used my training and biotics to subdue her attackers. No one saw the fight except the three who I took out."

Viola turned to the kettle and decided to boil some fresh water for tea. "No eye witnesses, no traceable DNA since you're not in any system, and no one really knew you at the party. You should be in the clear."

"Yeah," Amber remarked. "I tried to make myself as noticeable as possible so Faridah and Heather could sneak out to the skycar. Some people probably saw them, but I doubt many will remember, considering all I was wearing was a towel and my underwear, and it was late. And if the guys try to come forward, then let Cerberus handle them. Their word against no one's, and they'll probably feel too shitty about being beaten by a girl to do anything about it."

"Well, one of them is in a coma, so only two would likely confess." Viola mentioned, causing Faridah to glance between the other two.

"A coma?" she asked Viola, before turning to Amber. "What? How? There were three of them?"

Amber rubbed her face and paused for a moment before answering. "I've basically been training to fight, Faridah. Those guys…I was kind of alright to two of them. Choked one out, knocked another one out, no unnecessary violence. I don't like hurting people…I really don't." Amber said, remorsefully. "I just…I saw Heather in the corner, crying and shaking and I got so angry at the last guy for doing that to her, for wanting to do that, to treat her like a…a sex doll… a hole to stick his dick in. So I threw him across the room and hit him until I snapped out of it…but there wasn't much of his face left. He was bleeding a lot…you saw my hands and arms in the washroom. I…I'm sorry if that freaks you out. I don't like people knowing I do that, because…I'm more than just a weapon. I'd understand if you thought I was a…a bit of a monster. Anyway, it won't come back to you, there's not enough for it to, so don't worry about it. Let those Cerberus shits know I feel bad about putting them in this situation, and I'll make it up to them."

Amber stood up from her chair and slowly made her way toward the exit.

"Where are you going?" Faridah asked, Viola also looking slightly confused.

"You two have heard enough tonight, and I've caused enough trouble. I'm going to get some sleep, you should too. I'll let you know more when I know more." She said, smiling apologetically at her friend before disappearing into the foyer, the door swiftly opening and shutting, letting in only a trace of the cool April night.

"Faridah…" She started, but her niece's sudden vitriolic glare held the words in her throat. _She'll calm down eventually…in time, everything will be back to normal…_

Viola watched as Faridah wandered out of the kitchen exhausted, heading back to her room. The kettle popped beside her, prompting her to pour a fresh cup and drop in a new bag. Viola took a sip and carried the cracked cup over to the trash dispenser.

_Out with the old, in with the new, it seems. This night has been…illuminating…_

* * *

**A/N: Welp, I had a full day at home, and it rained, so I wrote. Yay another chapter! Whooo!**

**Again, lots of dialogue in here. Trying to wind this story down, have a lot of ground to cover, and some things just needed to come out into the open.****And I hadn't done a Viola POV in a while, so I gifted you all that (you can thank me with cookies), I know how much you all just LOVE her… ;)**

**So yeah, thanks for the kind responses to the last mammoth of a chapter, it's nice to know that the length wasn't too off-putting or anything. It's funny, I was going to cut this chapter before Amber's confrontation with Viola, but I decided to include it so I could progress easier, which left me with another xbox hueg chapter. **

**Anywho, thank you all so much! Many thanks to all the readers and reviewers! I hope to maybe get another chapter out by the weekend, but my week gets busier from here on out. I'll do my best, though! **


	19. Chapter 19

_June 6__th__ 2170  
_

* * *

Amber strolled down the downtown streets, the early summer heat refreshing alongside the cool northerly breeze. It had become a regular occurrence for her to walk to and from the library, at least since her revelation; it often meant that she'd spend less time listening to music or studying biology, but it was worth it in the end. _Sometimes, a sacrifice isn't really a sacrifice…I get to visit the parks often, and I get exercise…and now I get a face to face meeting with the Alliance! What a way to finish off the work week!_

Amber correctly surmised that Cerberus had put a tail on her during her trip home ever since she'd decided to walk, though they had gotten sloppy in recent weeks, allowing the Alliance to provide a distraction and room enough for her to slip into an upcoming flower shop unnoticed. As Amber jogged down the sidewalk, she could easily spot the relatively large protest march coming in her direction. She kept pace, emerging into the crowd as a hovercar sped by directly above them, causing widespread panic in the protesters; the following two police skycars following at the low elevation did nothing to help the matter. Amber slithered through the confused, frantic mob and slid into a storefront deep in the heart of the protest, hiding behind a shelf until her omni-tool beeped. Opening the message and receiving confirmation that her tail was lost, she proceeded into the open storage room in the back of the shop, finding a familiar individual waiting for her in civilian clothes.

"Amber." The tall, dark man stated, a look of relief spilling across his features. Amber increased her pace toward him in turn.

"Anderson!" she said excitedly, a smile immediately formed on her face as she moved across the large room. The man looked at her curiously as she sped toward him, surprised at the look of sheer glee on her face. His look of curiosity shifted to one of shock as he felt a fist slam into his midsection, setting him slightly off balance as his body reflexively compensated for it by leaning forward. Amber's eyes bore into his, her stare as intense as some krogan he'd encountered before.

"That was for breaking your promise, you ass." She grumbled, before stepping forward and wrapping her arms around his waist. "And this is for helping us get out of this mess."

Anderson muttered under his breath as he pulled away and rubbed where she'd hit him. "I suppose, given the circumstances, I might have deserved that. Now, are you done being insubordinate?"

Amber gave him a sidelong glance. "Insubordinate? I'm not an Alliance soldier or anything, Anderson."

"You're working with us on this, and you're under my supervision, so yes, you're under my authority. You work for me, so are you done, child?" Anderson asked, his voice as hard as flint; Amber could see that he probably commanded respect among his people, but she was hardly one of his average people.

"I'll finish when I'm finished. Like I said, I'm glad you're here, actually doing something. You really dropped the ball last time. Don't make promises you can't keep, it's really simple. And don't lie to me. I told you not to, but you did, and…and maybe things would have been a lot different if you'd told me the truth." Amber calmly ranted. Anderson seemed to catch on quickly and nodded.

"You were a child, I thought I would be sparing you pain by keeping things from you. That kind of information, those from Singapore…that's too much for a young child to take in, to understand." He said, a note of regret among his words. "And for all I knew, you and your sister were in an Alliance Academy in Toronto, getting straight A's."

"Yeah, well, you could have checked in on us in person, maybe. You know, since it was you who promised we'd be fine? You could have told me what symptoms to look out for from biotic exposure, so that when Mel got sick, I'd maybe have caught on faster instead of thinking the worst that could happen was the goddamn flu!" Amber noted, venom dripping from her voice. Anderson stepped toward her, earning a sharp glare from her.

"Is she alright?" he asked, simply, while she held her glare. His voice betrayed the growing concern that wasn't evident on his face.

"She's dead. She's been dead for close to two years now. You didn't expose her…but some of that…some of that's on you. She trusted you, and because of her, I trusted you. Now she's gone and I've had to deal with that. Now you get to make up for that. I'll even help." Amber noted, her eyes unmoving from Anderson's and she tapped away on her omni-tool, soon hearing a beep from Anderson's. She swore she thought he shrunk slightly at the news of her sister, but she couldn't quite tell. "Some more info on the Reds and these Cerberus people. Smuggling red sand off Earth this time. Figure that's worth something."

Anderson opened the message and scanned through it. "It's vague, but it does list a location on Amaterasu…and it's consistent with the other messages you've sent us. This should really help get us some traction, now knowing for sure that they're working on a galactic level. Gives us a little more pull. Besides, these Cerberus people…they've been like ghosts in recent years. This might be a good chance to catch them."

"Good. Have your bosses talked about any of the things I've requested?" Amber asked, finally breaking the stare and looking off toward a crate in the corner of the room.

"They…don't feel comfortable with what you asked for, and frankly, neither do I. It's not a good idea to have a minor living on a colony alone. Considering that the Alliance would feel you'd need some guard, it could be a drain on resources. I'm sorry." Anderson stated, looking again at the message Amber had relayed. "We can get you an amp, though. That will be no issue."

"Look, I brought this to you guys. I've given you a lot of information that could help take down the Reds and could help maybe take down this Cerberus thing going on. I've stuck out my neck, here. I'm not asking for much, but…" Amber stated, pausing to think about other options she could look into. _Well, I can understand why a sixteen year old alone on Drasta could be a problem, considering I'd be under their care because of my age. That said…maybe I won't have to live there…If I offer a little more…But…fuck. Then again, maybe Joel's right. Maybe…_

"I could see if we could throw in a small fund for when you turn eighteen, if that will help." Anderson stated, interrupting her thoughts. Amber shook her head and paced around the room.

"No, no. Look, here's what I want, and I…I think it works out for both of us. You get me an amp, like you promised, one of those L3 things. You get me a shuttle flight to a colony of my choosing, giving me a week or two of vacation to do whatever I want. You agree to help me buy land if I decide to." Amber started reeling off her demands and, noticing Anderson was about to interject, threw up a hand. "No, stop. I'm not done, just listen. I want the money in my bank account transferred over to an anonymous account you'll set up for me, because Cerberus has the ability to handle my money right now, and that's a problem. I want you to maintain a small piece of land here in Ottawa, or move the piece of land to a safer place near Ottawa, or a piece of land on a colony of my choosing. I want Faridah Guzman to have protection through her schooling. I want to make sure she's safe, because she's innocent in this. She shouldn't be involved and it's up to us to keep her out of this mess."

Anderson nodded slowly and lowered his omni-tool. "You understand that your request will be denied…the Alliance will not agree to it. You're right in that the mole's girl should not be involved and should be protected, but I do not see how…if we accomplish our goals here…she would be in danger. It would be a waste of resources."

"I'm not finished with my offer. I…" Amber started, pausing as she considered whether she was making the right decision. "I offer myself. After my trip to the colonies, you put me in one of your damn schools and when I turn eighteen I serve a minimum standard three years with you. It's a win-win. I get peace of mind, and you get a trained biotic for about four years. You get good media coverage by catching the Reds red-handed, and you maybe catch something on Cerberus. I'm not asking for much."

Anderson stood there and pondered her offer, leaving the girl antsy over the commitment she'd just maybe agreed to. "That could work. The Alliance values biotics highly, and having one requiring less training…it could seem like a deal."

"It is a deal. I'm offering you a lot, and asking for a little, but what I am asking for means a lot to me and I want it done right. Especially Faridah. If any harm comes to her, I guarantee I'm out at the end of those three years, and I'll make your lives a living hell." Amber warned him, stopping her pacing.

"You could get discharged before those three years if you don't like how we handle things, if we don't hold up our end of the bargain. To be truthful…I wouldn't expect most to continue to serve, knowing that was part of the agreement." The man stated, his voice slightly softer, making note of her concern.

"I don't break my promises, Anderson." Amber said as she pulled up her omni-tool, opening her calendar. "Anyway, now that I've basically signed my life away, what's next? Where do we go from here? Are you sticking around in Ottawa?"

"Well, there's a series of conferences I was supposed to attend here, coincidentally, so I will come and go from here to Arcturus Station for the next few weeks. It'll provide good cover for whatever plans the brass decide upon." Anderson noted, gesturing for Amber to follow him to the rear entrance of the building.

"You're not in charge?" Amber asked, shaking her head. _What's the point of even meeting then?_

"No, but I'm not far from it. When Cerberus was mentioned, one of the Rear Admirals decided to take it as a personal project. I'm reporting directly to him on this. I'll relay the new intel to him, and we'll get back to you as soon as we can. Until then, just hang in there and keep doing work for them. Keep their confidence in you." Anderson said, opening the door, revealing a hovercycle and a man standing by it. "Corporal Sellers will get you close to one of the more secluded parks and drop you off when it's clear. Stay safe, Amber."

Amber nodded slowly and watched as the corporal got on the hovercycle, patting the seat directly behind him. _Oh, fuck me. This is probably going to be the worst ride ever…_

* * *

Faridah sat on the otherwise empty bench, waiting for her friend to arrive. Anxious, she brought her omni tool up and checked the chrono again, as she had sixteen times already in the past ten minutes. _Seventeen, now. Three fifty-six. Four minutes until she's late. What if she doesn't come? What if those horrible people have taken her away to some terrible place…what if they're on their way here? I shouldn't have come here alone, it was such a bad idea, I…_

"Hey there." she heard from behind her as a chin gently rested on the top of her head. Faridah sighed in relief at her friend's voice. _She's safe…_

"You made it." Faridah said, trying to strip the emotion from her voice as she spoke. Amber hurdled over the bench and plopped down beside her, giving her a quizzical look.

"Uh, yeah. You asked me to come, so I did. This is for that big dance thing, right?" Amber asked, tilting her head slightly as she looked in Faridah's direction.

"Yeah, it's for prom." Faridah mumbled, immediately ashamed for sounding as dejected as she did. _Just earlier I didn't care about prom anymore. I was going to tell Amber that we should get something for the party instead…maybe…_

"Is everything alright? You were kind of quiet at the table yesterday." Amber mentioned, leaning slightly toward her. _Heavens, she…is it bad that she makes me feel normal? I'm such an idiot…_ "I know you and your mom still aren't talking…that's your call, but…you can talk to me, you know."

"Viola's a bitch, Amber. I…I lay awake some nights and I can't get the thought out of my mind that she's killed children…that she hurt you and your sister so badly…she's a monster and I can't believe I didn't see it before. She's been so…impersonal the past few years. She used to smile more, laugh more. We used to do things together, and…that just ended and it's like I don't even know if I ever really knew her. She's been my only parent for my whole life, the only person willing to take me in, and…" she ranted, her face flushing with anger. _And if she didn't, those kids would be alive..._ "And I don't think I can ever forgive her. She hasn't even apologized, you know? Not a single word to say she felt she made a mistake. I tried to wring one out of her a month ago and she said that if her findings result in 'effective treatment' that it was worth it. UGH! I…just need to get away from her. Anyway…this little trip is to get clothes, and you asked about me."

Amber held her concerned gaze and nodded in understanding.

Faridah mustered up her willpower and gave Amber a bright smile as she stood up. _Let's just…do this. Maybe prom won't be so bad…_ "I'm fine, really. Now come on, those dresses are waiting!" She watched Amber's eyes roll and took the brunette's hand, leading her off toward the mall entrance.

Faridah had never been the most exciting shopper; she often gave that title to Katie. Instead, she knew colours and cuts that worked for her and would stick to them, leaving very few distinctive options in her wardrobe. It was only an hour later that Faridah found a dress she felt fit her well, and mercifully offered Amber a break from the crowds on a bench in the upper levels.

"You spend an hour shopping, find something you like, and don't get it. I…don't get it, Faridah." Amber sounded a mixture of baffled and exhausted that Faridah couldn't help but giggle at.

"I did buy it, it's going to be shipped to me closer to prom, with the small adjustments I asked for. Now I get to walk around the mall more without lugging around a big poofy dress." Faridah said with a smug grin plastered on her face, drawing a mortified look from her friend.

"We…have to stay here longer?" she choked out, crestfallen at the announcement. Faridah couldn't help but laugh again at her friend's comical reactions. _I swear I haven't laughed this often in a long time…_

"Of course, we need to get you something for Heather's party tonight!" she mentioned excitedly, eliciting an exasperated sigh from Amber, the girl's hands animated as she began her expected rebuttal.

"My clothes are fine." The brunette said stiffly. "It's supposed to be a casual get together. Give me a break, here!"

Fardah stood up off the bench and pulled Amber up holding her friend's hand a split second longer than was probably necessary. "You're going to need to negotiate better than that, miss."

"Negotiate?" Amber groaned, shaking her head. "You do realize that I did my share of that yesterday and it didn't turn out all that well for me." Faridah nodded her head as her thoughts returned to the previous night's dinner. She'd nearly choked on her potatoes when she heard Amber had signed herself away in exchange for some protections she didn't care to mention. It hadn't felt real then, and it still didn't as Amber's words filled her ears. _It's not like I've spent all my life with her…she spent most of the time we've known each other avoiding me, but…there's something about her. Everything's so uncertain when she's not here…_

"Yeah. If you don't want me to get you all dressed up and amazing looking, you're going to need to offer me something in return." Faridah said playfully.

"But…I could just walk away, you know." Amber noted, her voice hopeful. Faridah shook her head. _Not this time, girly_

"No, I'm your ride, remember? Unless you know the way to Heather's home…which you don't…" Faridah dropped her voice into a slightly lower register, doing her best to sound menacing.

Amber snickered at her attempt to sound evil and offered yet another sigh. "Alright. Fine. What do I need to do?"

Faridah pumped her fist in victory and led Amber into a nearby store. "Heather has a pool, and I know you'll probably want to use it."

"Yeah, well, you know me. I like swimming, so what?" Amber asked, nervously checking the racks of clothes surrounding her for a hint of what she had in mind. _It might be a bit of a stretch, but…I think I should try to get her to take a chance…I want her to know that no one thinks she's a freak. _Faridah thought to herself as she led the clueless brunette around the store until she stopped in front of a single rack. "What the Christ…"

"You can't honestly think I'd let you desecrate Heather's pool with that huge bodysuit of yours, do you?" Faridah asked innocently, batting her eyelashes jokingly at her friend, who scoffed at her act.

"You actually want me to wear something like this?" Amber asked, holding up what was probably the smallest bikini in the store. Faridah grabbed it from her and replaced it with a more fitting black bikini. Amber recoiled as it was placed into hands. _Well, at least she didn't drop it. Or catch fire._

"Lots of girls wear these, Amber. I think you'd look great in it." She blurted out jokingly, feeling her heart beat a little faster as Amber blushed furiously. _She's so adorable when she blushes…_

"Look, Faridah, that…that might be true but…I can't wear that." Amber stammered, looking anywhere but the swimsuit. Faridah took it back and placed it on the rack, noticing her friend's relief as it left her possession.

"Amber…" she said softly. "I know how you feel, but you told me a few weeks ago that you want to start getting over how you feel about them."

"It's just a really big step, you know?" she mumbled, a nervous grin etched on her face. "I don't know if I can."

Faridah reached out and gently pulled Amber's gaze back to her. "It's your decision. I just remember you being…you really wanted to try. You might not be ready, that's fine, I won't pressure you anymore. But the party won't be like the last one, you'll know me, Katie, Heather, and her family is wonderful. You'll have nothing but support from us if you want to try. If you don't, then I can give up on this and move onto something else more comfortable for you. I don't want you feeling uncomfortable around us, and if that means you have to grace us with that bodysuit, then so be it."

Amber's grin widened as she pondered. "I hate that fucking thing, you know. I hate it more than words can say." She said, pausing for nearly a minute afterward. "I'll give it a try. I…I'll bring both just in case I'm not feeling good about it, but I'll try it."

Faridah gave her a smile and picked the black bathing suit up again. "So, you're okay with this? You sure?" she asked, concerned. Amber nodded.

"Yeah, I'm sure." Amber noted, her voice more resolute than before. "And you're going to lend me something to wear for the party." She finished, nudging Faridah.

"Oh alright, but I can only spare you a top. Your butt is just a bit too ravishing to fit into my pants, and your feet are a size or two bigger than mine." Faridah nodded, accepting the deal. _I have just the top in mind, too…_

"Hah, you're sounding like Katie. Well, it's not like the state of my butt matters to anyone, if everyone's bringing their boyfriend. Are you getting anything to look 'ravishing' for Isaac?" Amber said playfully, though her words sent a slight pain through Faridah's gut.

"He won't be coming." She said quietly and quickly. "And I'm sure all the boyfriends will appre…"

"He what?" Amber asked confused, stopping Faridah as they made their way to the cashier terminal. Faridah couldn't help but shy away from Amber's gaze, hoping that she wouldn't catch on that her life's been a bit of a mess lately. "What happened? Faridah…talk to me, please."

Faridah sighed and looked to her feet. _What the hell do you want me to say, Amber? That my life's been a wreck for two months? That I can't sleep and I have to force myself to eat, and…what do you want me to tell you? How could I? That the reason he broke up with me…I…_

"Isaac broke up with me." She heard herself say indifferently. She could see Amber's feet staying in the same spot, but felt the heavy weight of her eyes on her. _Think! Think of something!_ "It…it just didn't work out. Please, don't worry. It's been two days. Let's just pay for this and keep going, alright?"

She felt Amber's gaze on her as she went to the terminal, as Amber swiped a credit chit, as they left the store. Faridah refused to make eye contact for fear that she'd shrink into nothingness or spontaneously combust but as they reached the busy mall walkways, she felt Amber gently lead her toward an unfamiliar store by the hand. She blushed at the touch, unsure if Amber was aware of the connotations around the act. _Still, I…I'm not letting go, am I?...Should I?_

The brunette made her way to a shelf, grabbed two pairs of jeans and led the both of them to a small changing stall, motioning for her to sit on the tiny bench. "I figured some privacy was in order." Amber said, the girl's words soft and soothing in her ears.

"Amber, I told you…" Faridah started, sitting down and keeping her eyes on the ground. _Good work, Faridah. Way to be blatantly obvious about how you're feeling…._ "I'm fine."

"You're not, even I can tell that." The younger girl whispered, kneeling in front of her unexpectedly, finding eye contact for a moment before Faridah averted her eyes. "I knew you were close…I don't have that kind of experience, but he must have meant a lot to you. It's okay to be upset about it, Faridah. It's not weakness, it's just being honest."

Faridah stared at a clothes hanger, feeling her eyes glisten as her vision clouded. _Honesty? I…I can't do that. I'm not sure I even cared all that much for him, but I can't even tell…I haven't been able to since I…but you mean a lot to me and you've just signed your life away, so what am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to do?_ She thought, feeling the dam break as small streams slid down her cheeks._ I have nothing…_

Faridah felt arms slide around her back and pull her forward; a mane of soft brown curls welcoming her as her face instinctively buried itself in them. She felt her body breaking into sobs, breaking under the emotional stress, but she felt a body against hers keeping her in one piece. She held the brunette's head closely with one arm as the other hung by her side, too exhausted to move at the moment.

"It's alright, just let it all out." Amber softly cooed, Faridah's head nuzzling in deeper at the words. "You care, and…I guess that's why you're upset, but that's good. You care, and that's why you're so amazing. There will be other guys. You're a smart, funny, caring charismatic girl that just so happens to be pretty damn attractive." Faridah smiled at her friend's words and let the soothing tones of Amber's voice calm her worries and fears. She'd stopped listening for a while and just kept holding on, enjoying the warmth of her body and how secure she felt.

When her tears stopped and her body calmed, Faridah loosened her grasp on her friend's head and let the girl put some distance between them. Amber held on for an extra second or two, gave her a reassuring squeeze, and pulled back; the girl's bright hazel eyes immediately finding her own.

"Do you feel any better? Are you going to be alright? Is…is the party going to be too much?" The brunette asked, her face mere inches from hers, the concern on the girl's face sending her heart fluttering. All Faridah could do was nod and smile, wiping the wetness from her eyes. "Alright then, let's fit me into a pair of jeans and get out of here."

Faridah couldn't stifle a laugh at her friend's eagerness to get away from the mall. "You still need shoes, you know." She noted, unable to wipe the smile off her face, even as Amber looked positively crushed.

"This party had better be worth it!" she said, scowling at the pairs of pants beside her. Faridah got up off the bench and let Amber use it to squeeze into one of the pairs._ I…think this party might be pretty good. Maybe even great…_

* * *

Heather's house was more modest than Amber had expected. After having seen the home at the last party, and having seen Viola and Faridah's large condo, she had expected something even a little grandiose. Instead, when the skycar dropped down by a small two story home with a modest sized garden out front, a well trimmed large yard, and bushes of flowers lining the small walkway to the front door, she shook her head and grinned.

_That's what you get for assuming, Amber. Just because you grew up with nothing, doesn't mean everyone else must be rich and have mansions…_ she thought as Faridah landed the skycar, the two of them taking in the fresh country air as they stepped outside.

Amber made her way up the stone walkway, marveling at the scent of the purple hydrangeas until a loud shout from ahead of her rang out.

"You're here!" Amber turned and found Katie dashing from the front doorway as Heather leaned up against it, smiling. The brunette braced herself as Katie practically leaped on her, hugged her tight and moved onto Faridah. "Now the fun can begin!" Katie ushered an amused Faridah quickly to the door as Amber continued to make her way slowly there. _Maybe I can plant some of these if I get something on a colony…these are nice. And it's nice to walk on something that's not concrete or pavement or steel._

Amber paused for a moment, admiring the tulip pots beside the steps up to the entrance. _Mel would be so excited…_

"I didn't take you for a flower enthusiast, you know." Heather noted, Amber surprised she was still at the door waiting. She took Amber into a light hug and gestured for her to enter.

"I'm not really." Amber said, walking into the cozy home. "I just like things when they're fully in bloom. Trees, flowers, vegetables, whatever." She looked around, walking past the foyer into the main living area. The kitchen and living room flowed into each other, uniting around an isolated fireplace between the two spaces. To her right, she could see a small hallway leading to a room and presumably a washroom, while two sets of stairs lay off to her left. Small vases of flowers and candles lay scattered across sills, tables, countertops; it was obvious that at least one person in the household was big into scents.

"I love the smells, but it's wonderful watching them grow. Even in the winter, when they're not in season, you know they can't wait to bloom. You can never hold back spring, afterall." Heather said, leading her through the living area and through the sliding glass doors to the back porch where the others were busy catching up. "There won't be many people here, but if you feel like taking a break, just let me know. I have a small nook up in the attic where I do my yoga, it's a quiet, relaxing little place."

Amber turned to the older girl and smiled, closing the doors behind them. "Thanks, Heather. I think I'll be fine though."

"The pool's always open too, so…but you don't look like you've brought anything." Heather's voice dropped, noticing the younger girl's hands were empty. Amber took a moment to catch on.

"Oh, no, no." Amber spilled out as they headed to the outdoor dining table where everyone had congregated, shaking her hands a little in front of her. "Faridah's got my stuff in her bag. It's just in the car, so thanks. I'm sure I'll use the pool later on. Right now, I just kind of want to relax after Faridah dragged me around the mall."

Heather laughed and sat down at the edge of the table, Amber sitting opposite her, as the rest of the table seemed oblivious to their arrival outside the attentions of the man beside her.

"Amber, this is my boyfriend Matt." She said as he offered his hand across the table. _He has kind eyes…_She smiled and shook it, looking off to the others conversing to the side of her. "My dad is the older guy with the silly comb over and my mom is the unfortunate woman beside him who has to put up with his picky eating habits. Fortunately, I'll be doing some of the cooking tonight, and I don't care."

Amber laughed at the descriptions, previously unsure about what to expect from Heather's parents. _Well, they seem happy, and…it's kind of cute that she described them like that…_She didn't have much time to pay attention to them, as Heather continued the introductions.

"The scraggly bearded guy at the other end of the table is my older cousin Jordan. He's staying with us until the middle of the month when he's allowed to move into his new place. If you compliment his beard…the sad thing that it is…he'll probably defend you to the death. He's a little odd like that." The older girl started, before Matt pitched in.

"That's Kyle over there with Katie." He started, pointing toward the stocky, slightly balding guy with his arm tight around her as they both laughed at something in their chat. "He's probably going to tell you a story about him punching out a bull once he's got a few drinks in him. Just…try to let him get through the story, or else he might try to prove himself against a large bush or sometimes a tree. He's a little stubborn like that, and the last thing we need is to bandage up his fists again, or fix a shrub in the middle of the night. It's my civic duty to keep him from getting that drunk tonight, though."

Amber laughed as she imagined the guy punching wildly at a bristly bush. "Kyle sounds like an interesting fit for Katie." Heather nodded, grinning at the pair.

"She really likes him. They're both kind of really silly… they're good together." Matt responded, turning his focus from the pair to Amber. "Can I get you a drink of anything?"

"Oh! Uh, water, please. Thank you." She spoke, turning her focus to the discussion at hand. Everyone seemed to be having a good time, but across the next while, Amber found Heather giving the odd concerned glance at Faridah_. Wonder what that's about?_ She thought, deciding to keep quiet and wait until a better opportunity presented itself.

As it started getting darker, the group mostly moved inside; Heather remained by the barbecue, cooking veggies and steak, and Amber sat on the lip of the deck, taking in the tranquility of the area_. It's totally different here than the last party…just a small home in the middle of nowhere, trees off in the distance, the smell of freshly cut grass mixing with the wilderness and the flowers…it's just really relaxing. I can see why they live all the way out here. Is this what it would be like on Drasta? Tiptree?_

Amber looked over at Heather to see her parents taking turns hugging her, giving her something, and her friend looking very thankful. _They just look…right. She's really…hell, they're all lucky to have each other. _

Her thoughts froze in place as the older couple wandered in her direction. She gave them a small wave as they approached.

"And you must be Amber." Her mom said, offering her hand. "I'm Dorothy, and this is Phil." Amber stood and shook both their hands.

"It's nice to finally meet you. Honestly, I think you broke a record of hers, she usually doesn't bring her friends around for a year or two after we know about them. She's our cutie-patootie, but she's an odd one." Her father noted, his pet name for Heather making it hard for Amber to restrain her laughter.

"It's because you embarrass her, Phil. You showed Katie her baby pictures the first time she came over. I'm not sure you even started talking to her before you practically shoved the holo album at her!" Dorothy said wearily, before turning to the brunette. "I'm sorry dear, we ramble like this often. Heather's told us…absolutely nothing about you, despite our prying."

Amber laughed and shook her head slightly. _Her parents are a little weird, but they're kind of funny_. "It's no problem. Honestly, I'm kind of boring, anyway. I don't do much, just swim, run and play piano. Reading's good too. Nothing exciting."

"Oh, music!" Phil exclaimed, his wife quickly nudging him. "Hey, come on. Can I help it if I'm the only one in this house who isn't tone deaf?" he turned his focus back to Amber. "Honestly, you should hear her and Heather try to sing, they sound like a flock of dying seagu-…ow!"

"We can enjoy music without playing it, Phil. Besides, if I remember, you can only play a single song on your guitar, so don't play yourself up." Dorothy said with mock indignation. "Our Heather often feels she's a little boring as well. We, of course think she's fantastic, as you can imagine, and couldn't be boring if she tried. Life is about the simple pleasures, and soon she'll be enjoying the stars while we're down here on the ground."

"In the stars? She's moving to a colony or something?" Amber asked, her curiosity piqued. _Maybe she's going to move somewhere with new flowers and plants and everything. Hrm…_

"Oh, no. Though I don't doubt she'll end up living on one someday. She's going to be joining the Alliance Navy out in space, flying out to Arcturus station to their military college out there. She's always been amazed by space, and our little girl will be the first from the family away from this planet. See? How can she be boring?" Phil asked, looking back at Heather, who was too preoccupied with checking the steaks to notice.

"Really? I had no idea." Amber said, clearly surprised at the revelation. _Heather's joining the Alliance too? That's…wow. Maybe I'll have a friend out there afterall. She'll probably outrank me severely, but hey…_ "That's pretty much my game plan, except replace Arcturus with a recruitment center here in Ottawa."

"There's nothing wrong with enlisting dear, there's so much opportunity out there. So much to see! It makes me happy to know she'll have a friend out there, somewhere." Dorothy said reassuringly. "Though with the recent news, I worry."

"Well, you're a worrywart, and I blame you for passing that onto our girl." He said, chuckling. "Honestly, Heather heard the news last month and decided she'd head off into space. Not sure where that gusto came from, but I know she'll be safe in the Alliance."

Amber looked from one parent to the next, confused. "What news? I'm not sure what you're talking about." Both parents stared at her in slight disbelief, bringing her to raise her hands up in mercy. "I don't really get out much. I don't watch the news at all, or really check the extranet…"

"Mindoir was attacked by some horrible Batarian slavers. It was a terrible thing, so many died or went missing." Dorothy noted sadly.

"The Alliance has put more people around the colonies to protect them better, though, and they need more people to help. It was a fluke, I'm sure it won't happen again." Phil added.

_Slavers? Batarians? I've never heard of those, but if they're slavers…yeah. Yeah, I can see why she decided to join up. Maybe I should talk to her…_

"Oh, well, I'm sure the Alliance has it covered." Amber said confidently, hoping to reassure Dorothy.

"Anyway, we've wasted enough of your time. You should get back to the party…" he said to her, before turning his focus to Dorothy "…and we should get going. Mont Tremblant is waiting, my dear." Phil said playfully, pecking his wife on the cheek. "You take care of our daughter, alright marine?"

Amber offered a mock salute, smiling. "Aye aye, sir." She watched as they walked out to their skycar and flew off. _Well, they're certainly not what I expected, but…they're proud of her and they support her. That means a lot…Heather must love them a lot. She seems to take after her mother more…_

She stretched and walked over to the sliding doors, unsure of whether to interrupt Heather while she was tending to the food. _Maybe later…_ she thought, heading back inside.

* * *

"You. Dance floor. Now." Katie commanded, standing directly in front of Amber, who sat on the couch alone. She sighed and stood up, ignoring the gleeful smirk on her blonde friend's face. It wasn't that she didn't like dancing. It wasn't that she didn't want to dance, either. The fact was that there were going to be two couples dancing, and then her; an idea that made her feel a little self-conscious. _It was fine when I was in a big group like me, with a few couples spread out in the pack, but…couples dance differently than I would, and I'm not sure I can really get into it knowing that's going on around me. It's silly, but…I'm not sure I'm feeling it_. Amber mused to herself as Katie returned to Kyle, a new song prompting the two pairs to start. _Oh well…I can give it a shot._

Amber took a step or two onto the living room floor and started the slow process of syncing her body up to the music. The music wasn't as loud or thunderous, but with the size of the room, it didn't need to be. The music wasn't fast, letting her slowly gain a feel for the sensual melody as her core kept time to the blooming bass. She closed her eyes as her body fell into it, her mind drifting to various thoughts as her body listened and anticipated the music's gentle shifts.

_This still doesn't feel like last time, the music's slower and less…desperate, I guess. It's not a slow song, but it's definitely couples music. I…I wonder if I'll find someone when I'm with the Alliance? I mean, there will probably be a lot of people in my shoes, or with similar childhoods or experiences, or people who like music and dancing…are people allowed to date each other when they're in the military? Actually…no, I don't think they are. That freaking sucks. Not that I'm desperate…just kind of lonely. I mean, I don't need anyone, and I'm not going to settle, but…I kind of want to connect with someone. To be more than just some protector, or some brute, or some pitiful less educated orphan girl to everyone…not that I think that's how they see me, but I don't really open up to a lot of people. I mean…who knows I'm a romantic? I don't think I've told anyone that, and I doubt they'd believe it if I did. I just want to be…me…around someone. Just me, and for that to be more than alright. I just…_

"Mind if I dance here?" a voice asked, seemingly far away. Amber's eyes slowly opened, finding Faridah in front of her. _Oh, I was wondering where she went off to._

"Sure." Amber shrugged. _She's standing a little closer than I'd expect, though, I hope I don't accidentally end up knocking into her. I should try and focus on not moving around much_. "Dance away, lady."

Amber closed her eyes again as the next song started, falling back into her rhythm. _I'll admit, _she thought to herself_. Faridah outdid herself with this top and these shoes…they're comfortable, and I don't feel like I'm being squeezed every which way. I should thank her later for picking both out…I hope she's not taking this party too hard, Isaac not being here and the other girls having their boyfriends…I just want her to be happy. With all this shit going on around her, I know it's been hard on her. Too hard. Anderson had better…_

Amber's thoughts were interrupted by an abrupt drop to a much slower tempo as a new song came on. Her eyes opened instinctively and a concerned looking Faridah stood still in front of her. _Oh Faridah, this must suck for you…_

"Amber…if you're not comfortable dancing to this, you can sit this out on the couch. It's alright." Faridah mumbled. _She looks…sad? Shy? Nervous? Worried? I can't tell…but…I really don't know about dancing on my own to slow songs. Maybe I should go sit down…_ Amber nodded at Faridah, but paused at seeing Faridah's face drop just slightly at the action.

"Maybe…I can…use some practice." Amber replied nervously, unsure she was doing the right thing. _I'm not Isaac, but maybe she just needs me to help her out right now. I can do this…I think?_ "Dance with me?"

Her knees weakened for a moment, seeing her friend's eyes tear up; for a moment, her brown eyes were the only thing she could focus on, radiating thankfulness as Faridah closed the distance between them. The raven-haired girl had a slight height advantage on her today, her heels having given her a few extra inches, leaving Amber's eyes closer to her friend's jaw-level.

The two began simultaneously, each watching each other's movements closely, finding their own rhythms and adapting to each other's in turn. Soon, their hips swayed in time with each other, each gentle, sensual motion matched by the other; both sets of eyes unwilling to waver from their partner's. Amber found herself quickly slipping into a mental state familiar to her mindset at the original party, but there was something new. She could feel the heat radiating from Faridah's body a mere inch or two from hers, her friend's calm, hot breath against her forehead. How her friend's head would sometimes brush up against her curls, how their legs would quickly fill the voids left by each other as they pivoted and moved within each other's personal space; each rolling and receding around each other like the tide, just a breath away from any more intimate contact.

Amber broke eye contact and let her eyes fall down to Faridah's exposed neck. _That dress really suits her, hanging off her shoulder like that…her neck looks…really nice…_ she thought to herself as her body slowly closed the distance between her and her partner, millimeter by millimeter, her arms grazing against Faridah's as she conducted her body toward the older girl. _Not sure why I'm feeling like this, but…maybe it's the music…_ she mused, her mind getting increasingly hazy by the second. Amber felt Faridah's short and slightly labored breaths against her ear as she unconsciously licked her lips, her heart beating faster as she neared her partner. As she exhaled on her neck, she noticed the girl's body shiver slightly, only making her more curious. She felt hands gently clasp onto her hips, guiding her core tight up against another, mere material separating the two rhythmic beings from each other's warmth. Amber took a steadying breath and breathed in as her face nuzzled softly against Faridah's open neck, the scent of lilac invigorating her senses. As she began to slip further into the depths of the music, the tempo of the music picked up, Amber's half-lidded eyed flashing open at the shift. _What?_

She took a step back, Faridah's hands quickly unfastening themselves from the hooks of her jeans, both staring at the void they filled a mere second ago. _That was a little intense…maybe I'm…not ready for that kind of dancing yet…_

"I…uh…Katie!" Faridah called out, moving quickly away from Amber, who in turn made her way back to the couch. "Katie, let's get some more drinks from the liquor store before they close!"

Amber plopped down onto the soft cushions, dazed and confused from the dancing. _What the hell just happened out there? How long were we out there for? What…what the hell WAS that, anyway?_

Amber took her lukewarm glass of water from before and finished it feeling particularly thirsty, but not feeling very satisfied. _This is just weird… _she thought, noticing the music had stopped, unaware how long ago. She saw Heather gently lower herself onto the couch beside her. She did her best to clear her mind, but it was difficult. _Everything feels really cloudy…_

"Amber, can we talk for a second?" Heather asked quietly. She sluggishly turned her head to the older girl and nodded, not feeling like she was capable of much more at the moment. "Faridah's been acting kind of weird lately, and…I'm worried."

Amber felt her mind clear quickly at the words, feeling a sudden urgency. "What? What do you mean weird?"

Heather sighed and leaned forward, biting her lip. "It all started a bit after the party in April. I mean, Faridah's a really good friend to me, and I can read her like a book. Something really messed her up, and she…she hasn't been the same since."

Amber paused to think, wishing she had some more water. _It's hard to think when you're feeling dehydrated…Faridah…well, she found out pretty much right after the party, so…maybe it was that? Still…_ "I haven't really noticed much. She's been stressed, but she's said it's school stuff, that she's graduating this year and…well, you know better than I do about how that feels."

"It's bigger than that. At least, I think it is." Heather said, noticing Amber's gaze intensify. "It's not school, because Faridah doesn't crack under pressure. She doesn't, but she's been missing a lot of classes lately, she's skipped basically all of her normal study sessions, and she bombed at least one test. She's still doing alright but…she's a genius, Amber. She shouldn't be struggling."

Amber nodded, feeling a pit in her stomach at the thought of Faridah's future in jeopardy. "Maybe she just feels like she can coast? I don't know. That's…worrying, Heather."

"I know! And…" Heather started, resting her head on her palms. "And she hasn't really hung out with the regular crew often. She used to be around every other day, and now we're lucky to see her once a week. When we do…she's different. She's not as energetic, she doesn't really smile. Not her smile."

"Well, that Isaac guy just dumped her, but…that was recent, and…shit, I had no idea she was doing this bad." Amber said, feeling exasperated from the onslaught of new worries.

"Yeah, I thought it was Isaac, but…when she was around him, she just seemed a little too out of it. Like she didn't really care. I think that's why he broke up with her, and I don't think she'd be too broken up about it. Or maybe she is, and she's upset that she was like that around him. I'm not sure. Every time I've tried to see what's up with her, she's walled me off. She's never done that before." Heather added, shaking her head.

"Heather, she…Faridah's been pretty regular around me. I mean, I see her at least once a week, and she's normally alright. When we went shopping today, she smiled…and not a fake one. She laughed, she…she kind of broke down when I brought up Isaac, but maybe it runs a bit deeper than that. Fuck, I feel…horrible." Amber muttered, that pit in her stomach feeling overwhelming. _Christ, Faridah, why couldn't you just tell me? I…_

"I think she's doing drugs, Amber. This…this is the last summer I have with her and I'm scared that she'll stay like this for a long time. I don't know what to do!" Heather wiped a stray tear from her eye and slumped back into the couch.

Amber reached out and gave Heather's hand a gentle squeeze. "I'll find out. I promise. If she's into anything, if she's having trouble with anything…I'll do my best to help her, I'll find the answer." Amber said, closing her eyes. _She's been there for you so much, you need to help her here. It's obvious she's taken this situation harder than she's let on, but maybe she's tried to get away from it with drinks or drugs…is that why she dragged Katie off? Fuck._

"I know…just promise you won't press her too hard…at least, like that. Just…be gentle with her, alright? She's not in a good place right now." Heather stammered, gazing intensely at a holo of her and Faridah across the room. It was clear that Heather's concern equaled hers.

"I promise, Heather. I…" she started. _When wouldn't I be gentle with her? I wouldn't hurt any of my friends… _"I'll be sure to be patient and gentle. I don't want her to feel like she can't trust us."

_But…when the hell will I get some time to find out? I…she'll be back soon, and everyone will be together drinking, and…ugh. I might have to wait a week, and…I don't want her suffering for that long. I don't want her suffering at all, and…for weeks, she's…Christ…_

Amber stood up off the couch and moved to the sliding doors, feeling like fresh air was suddenly required to breathe. Even then, it was difficult. _This night might be longer than expected…_

"So Heather," She called out from the doors. "I hear you're heading off into space?"

* * *

The rest of the night had gone well, the group mostly relaxing in the living room, waxing nostalgic on their past adventures or experiences. Amber didn't have much to contribute, but just being there to listen was entertaining enough. It hadn't taken very long for many of the group to pass out or feel sleepy, leaving Amber free reign of the house for the most part, barring the bedrooms.

She and Heather had talked about joining the Alliance as well; each confessing their nervousness of committing to it and not knowing what's out there, each expressing their excitement for seeing colonies and the other races, and space ships. Amber recalled Heather's intensity upon bringing up Mindoir, feeling pride that her friend would throw herself into service to help keep others safe. _And she won't be in the front lines, which is great. She'll be fixing ships, running tests on equipment to make sure they're working right, scanning sensors for whatever…important stuff. Nice knowing that there are people like me living normal lives, who just feel the call to help. I might not be thrilled at joining the Alliance, but if I can help get Faridah out of this mess, and also help keep some off-worlders safe…that's kind of great._

Amber slipped behind a bush and tossed her clothes onto a nearby chair, changing into her swimsuit. The pool wasn't very deep, but it was deep enough for her to relax comfortably in. _Afterall, any pool is a good pool…_ she thought, tying the strings behind her neck. The bikini fit her well, though she felt a little guilty that she waited until everyone was asleep to take a dip into the water. The pool was warm, surprising her that the property could be even more relaxing that it had already seemed._ Jeez, these people know comfort…_

Amber waded over to the deep and and rested her arms on the stony ledge. _Not long now until the Alliance calls me up and tells me we're going ahead with whatever plan they've cooked up. Christ, I hope it's a good one. They've got to put focus on Cerberus, they have to. The reds…they're always around, they're easy. The evidence we have…they're dead in the water. It's those Cerberus creeps…that Fiske guy that Viola talked about. _Amber shook her head and sighed, pushing off the wall of the in-ground pool into a light backstroke. _That woman's got debts to pay, I swear. Just because she lost her sister, doesn't mean she has to be a monster to get anything done. To help Faridah…whole lotta good she's done to help that girl…_

She kicked out and descended into the pool's depths, enjoying the feeling of sitting on the floor of the pool, looking up to the shimmering surface. _And I won't see that girl come September. I probably won't see her for a few years, same with Heather, and Katie, and anyone else. Joel. I won't have any lessons with Joel soon…I should probably let him know…_ Amber mused, rising back to the surface to gift some air to her straining lungs. _I won't see any of them for a while, but…they're still going to be my friends, I won't be alone. Neither will they. They'll be off fulfilling their dreams, living their lives, safe, away from danger… They'll be fine. I just need to get this done so that they can ALL be fine. So that I can be fine…_

A light swishing of water broke her out of her reverie; Amber turned to look behind her, where the light splashing came from and saw Faridah sitting on the edge of the pool, looking worriedly at her.

"Do you need any help?" the raven-haired girl asked, sending Amber drifting back into nostalgia. She floated over to her morose friend slowly, laughing softly to herself.

"I think I'm having a bit of déjà-vu." Amber noted, her eyes scanning over her friend, whose brows furrowed in confusion. _She's wearing a swimsuit, so…_

"I meant…" Faridah started, before Amber took hold of her leg and hauled her into the water, eliciting a scream. The girl rose up to the surface, spat out the pool water and scowled at the wildly grinning brunette. "I meant with whatever you and my aunt are doing to…"

Amber interrupted her with a splash of water, Faridah just getting her hands up in time to block the majority of it. "Don't worry about it." Amber laughed. "Besides, it's a party, do you really want to talk about serious stuff like that?"

"I'm out here aren't I?" Faridah said, more than a little annoyed. "I want to…I want to feel like I can do something."

"Then answer me this…" Amber started, circling around her friend. "Are you doing drugs? Red sand? Meth? Heroin?"

Faridah spun around sharply, sending a wave of waver into Amber's face. "What? No, no. I'm not on anything, why would you even ask me that?!"

Amber kept circling Faridah slowly, blinking the water from her eyes. "Heather's worried about you, and thought you might be doing something like that."

"I can't exactly tell her that I might die because my mom's bosses are fucking psychopaths, and that they're planning to kill a few hundred kids, can I?" Faridah said, her voice beginning to tremble slightly. "I've never held a secret from my friends before, and this…this has been too much."

Amber slowed her wading and swam a little closer to Faridah, keeping some space between her and the agitated girl. "I know what it's like to not be able to talk about something. You could have used me as a sounding board instead of bottling it up, Faridah. I…the last thing I wanted was for you to suffer through this. I know you're not talking to Viola…I'm sorry that you had to learn about all that. I know that's probably a big reason why this is hitting you so hard, but…you can always, always talk to me. I know you've been struggling in school, and you haven't been getting out…"

"What's the point?!" Faridah seethed, Amber wincing at the girl's obvious frustration. "What's the point of anything if I'm going to die soon? School? What's the point if I won't make it to College? Friends? I might never see them again in a few months, and it hurts to be around them with that reminder floating over their heads. A part time job? What good is money when…and a boyfriend?…I tried to care, but I can't. I can't anymore. All I do these days is worry, and I'm terrified almost all the time. It's killing me." Faridah's voice had tapered off into a quiet whisper by the end of her rant, drawing Amber to wade up to her.

"Faridah, I'm so sorry." Amber said shaking her head, unsure what she could say or do to make it better. Her friend's words gutted her, her mind felt raw at the mere thought of what Faridah had gone through. She carefully took Faridah's hand and began leading her to the shallower end of the pool. "I promise that everything will work out, and…I really want you to talk to Heather. Whether it's before or after this mess, she needs to know you're alright. Maybe even more than I do."

"I'll try to…I'll try to talk to her, but I don't know how right now. I know she feels really bad…I don't want her to worry." Faridah wiped at her face hastily, looking away from Amber. "And…you promise everything will be fine? How can you even say that? How do you know? You're just as in the dark as me, why aren't you scared?"

"Because I don't break my promises." Amber said softly, stopping as they reached the pool wall, their feet resting against the pool floor. "And I'm scared…I'm really scared that this will break you and that thought's kind of haunted me a lot lately. But I'm able to handle it, much better than I could have a few years ago, because you've helped me. I'm stronger now because of you."

"You've always been strong. You'd walk around nude when pretty much any other girl was scared to show their bodies. You didn't care. You were comfortable with yourself, and then because of me, you couldn't anymore. For a while, you couldn't even touch yourself in some areas, and that…that's horrible." Faridah ranted, looking off toward the house. "But now you're getting over that, and…and I can't get over this. I'm not as strong as you, Amber. I can't be."

"Faridah…this isn't your fault. None of it is, your aunt…she's really messed up and she laid this on you without you knowing. It wasn't right, and it was an excuse she gave herself to keep doing what she was doing. Even without you'd she'd be doing it. I wish…" Amber paused, gathering her thoughts as Faridah gazed intensely at her. "I wish that none of this ever happened. That I never met Viola, that she never got into this shit, that she didn't get in bed with Cerberus. Everyone's lives would be better, and you wouldn't have to go through this…you shouldn't have to go through this. If none of this ever happened, then everything would be better, but…"

"I'd miss you." Faridah whispered, halting Amber's rambling. Amber chuckled and squeezed her hand, unaware how long she'd been holding it.

"Oh come on, Katie and Heather are much better friends than me." Amber joked. "Besides, they're a lot more like you, and you all deserve each other."

"No." The word escaped Faridah's mouth with desperation. "I…I would go through this again if it meant meeting you. Being your friend. I…lately, I can barely go a few seconds without my mind racing with worry, I just feel so alone when you're not near me, and...and…" Faridah said tearfully, choking back sobs. Amber gently pulled Faridah closer, holding her shaking body against hers, hoping to provide some comfort. Faridah's arms immediately latched onto Amber's back, drawing a gasp of shock from the dark haired girl as she moved to pull away.

"I'm so sorry, Amber, I…I know…" she stammered as Amber hushed her.

"It's fine, Faridah. I'm fine." Amber whispered, smiling. _Honestly…I didn't even feel a twinge of guilt when she hugged me. It…it's relieving._ The girl brought her hands up to where Amber had normally designated a 'safe zone', sliding them under her curly locks and intertwining behind her neck.

"Is that more comfortable?" Faridah asked, her eyes shining in the moonlight, rendering Amber breathless for a moment.

"I'm always comfortable with you." She replied, feeling her friend's hand slide down her neck to her shoulders and pause.

"Your neck and shoulders are really stiff." The girl stated softly, her hand slowly kneading both areas, drawing a light sigh from Amber as she closed her eyes. "If you don't mind…"

Amber just rested there as Faridah worked out the knots, murmuring and humming her gratitude as her body relaxed to the girl's touch. Slowly, the pair of soft hands worked their way down her back across her scars, massaging the muscle underneath. Amber found herself leaning forward the further Faridah made her way down, her head soon resting on her friend's shoulder, feeling the tightness leave her body with every press of her palm, every caress of her fingers.

"You're unbelievable." Amber mumbled as her friend worked on a particularly sore area.

"You're beautiful." Faridah blurted out, her hands pausing as she seemed to take in what she'd said. Amber, started by the statement, recoiled and took a step back, Faridah's arms trailing reluctantly off her body, the girl lowering her head to stare at the rippling water between them. Amber's mind raced at the implications. _Maybe she just thinks I'm attractive, I mean, I told her she was earlier today, and maybe she just wanted me to feel good about myself. Maybe it was a harmless compliment and…wow…I wonder if anyone's ever told her that she glows when she blushes…_

"I'm so sorry, that was really stupid of me, and…and it was inappropriate, and I mean, you're just really fit, and I'm such an idiot, and…and I was just…" Faridah's embarrassment stumbled out of her as Amber floated back to her. "I…I can keep massaging you if you want, and I'll be quiet and I promise I…"

_Is she attracted to me? I…don't think anyone's ever really looked at me like that, thought of me like that, and…I've never really felt beautiful. Not with…well, but maybe in the future…maybe…does she like me?_  
"Can…can you continue?" Amber said, mentally berating herself as the words spilled from her mouth. _Stupid! Come on, you know that's just going to make everything more awkward…_

"Oh…uh, alright." Faridah mumbled shyly, her words barely whispers. "But you should probably turn around…it's…it's easier that way." Amber took a small step and, feeling a little bit of confidence from Faridah's awkward sputtering, gently pulled Faridah's face back to hers; the girl's brown globes shining as bright as she'd ever seen them.

"Uh…um…" she started, beginning to giggle nervously as Amber pressed up against her body, blushing faces an inch apart. Her hands returned to the brunette's neck and began gently massaging it, one hand shyly reaching up to caress the mane of long brown curls as their heads slowly angled toward each other. Faridah took small steps backward leading her body to rest against the pool wall as Amber's hands graced tantalizing trails on the small of her back. Amber felt the raven-haired girl softly pull her head toward hers and smiled; she felt hot breath on her lips, she felt her eyes shut in anticipation, and wanted to feel more. Amber's knees went weak as their lips brushed against each other tenderly, Faridah pulling them together with one last motion as they fell into the kiss like a fever, unaware of the water rushing around them.

The brown-eyed girl was the first to come up for air, Amber's gasps following her, both instinctively finding each other's eyes as they rushed forward into a more urgent kiss, Amber moaning as Faridah's teeth gently bit on her lower lip, feeling the girl's pulse quicken as their slick bodies slid against each other needily. As they clumsily made their way back to the stability of the wall, Faridah's left arm traced a path down to Amber's hips; a sudden firm squeeze on her ass parting their lips as Amber leaned over a giggling Faridah.

"I've wanted to do that for so long." A huge grin spread across her face, drowsy with pleasure, a rosy blush overtaking her cheeks. Amber moved her head, her cheeks brushing softly against Faridah's rosy ones. She felt Faridah's hand move down to her upper thighs, her touch fueling the fire inside her. She braced herself against the pool wall to keep standing, unable to keep from sliding down, her face catching sight of the neck that had entranced her previously. Amber took a steadying breath and met the tender skin with her lips, kissing a trail down its slender territory, Faridah's ragged breaths urging her on as their rapidly beating hearts fell into time with each other's.

Amber nuzzled further into the brown-eyed girl's neck, tracing shapes down the expanse with her tongue, nibbling and sucking on the sensitive flesh as if it were a delicacy. Faridah's tightened grip and soft moans fell deaf on Amber as she continued devouring her, one hand cupping the girl's ass to keep her upright, and one clutching the girl's body tight against her own. She felt Faridah grip at her curls and press her face deeper, hearing her whimper as she bit down harder. _What am I doing? _She thought, as a moment of clarity hit her. She moved her head up the neck and away from it, angling for a kiss, Faridah eagerly reciprocating. Their lips tenderly met; Faridah's tongue probed to find hers, the friction turning Amber into a shivering mess as she fought over wanting more and wanting to be realistic. In the end, Amber stumbled back and held Faridah at arm's length. The pure desire on the girl's face almost sent her back, her body yearning for another embrace. _Fuck, I've never felt wanted like this, I…Christ, I've never felt that primal…I thought I was going to tear her neck apart…I…honestly, she needs long hair so I don't have to stare at it. _

Faridah's slowly sobering expression broke Amber from her thoughts, as the girl slumped back against the wall looking dejected. "Did I do something wrong?"

Amber shook her head animatedly. "No, no. I…Christ, you did everything right. God, it felt so right." She reached out and took the girl's hand as it tried to wipe away the tears brimming around her brown eyes. "Faridah, you're amazing. Unbelievable….but this…this can't work."

"…Because you're going away." Faridah's words fell soft on her ears, the sorrow in her voice palpable.

"You'll be in school studying engineering and I'll be in the Alliance. Our lives…they're too different." She said sadly, feeling the weight of the truth heavy on her shoulders.

"I can join the Alliance too, I can…" Faridah started, pausing as Amber kissed the back of her hand tenderly.

"There's no dating in the Alliance from what I know, and even if there was, you'd be going to school to do that, while I'd be enlisted. We'd never see each other. We… we don't fit. Our lives…can't work together. I…I'm not the kind of person who does flings, and I care for you too much for that to work." Amber noted, wanting to believe the words out of her own mouth were lies.

Faridah waded forward and hugged Amber around her waist, resting her forehead against the brown curls on the brunette's forehead. "For a moment, can I just pretend you're mine?"

Amber paused, enjoying the sensation and gently moved Faridah's head to rest on her shoulder. "It's not fair. You've been there for me. You helped me get through a lot of my shit…you saved my life." She muttered, sighing as she returned Faridah's hug. "You've given me more than I could have ever asked you for, and now I can't give you what you want from me."

"If you get us through this summer…and if you give me one last kiss…then I'll call it even." Faridah mumbled into Amber shoulder, gently kissing it before bringing her head level with Amber's.

Amber took in the view of the girl, cupping her face with her hands. _This is all I can give you, Faridah, and it's a damn sad gift. _Their eyes fluttered shut as their mouths crossed the distance to embrace each other gently, writing to memory each sensation, each taste, each scent, each shiver of pleasure. Their lips parted, and then reluctantly left each other's grace. They smiled sadly at each other as they leaned back against the pool wall side by side.

"Can we even be friends after this?" Amber asked quietly, her voice shaking with worry as she stared up at the brilliantly starry sky. A light touch on her back brought her focus back to Faridah.

"I don't want you out of my life." She confessed , blinking away her tears. "I...I can't promise I won't think your ass is really squeezable now and then…or all the time… and I won't deny that for the next week, I'll probably still feel your teeth on my neck every time I look in the mirror…"

"I'm really sorry about that, I kind of just…I have no idea why I did that." She said, grinning nervously.

"Honestly, I thought you were going to…uh…well, it felt amazing, anyway. I don't know if I have enough makeup to cover the hickeys from it, though." Faridah said sheepishly, reaching and clutching Amber's nearest hand. "But you're absolutely my friend. Yeah, things might be different, but I really like you. Promise you'll stay in touch?"

"I…I promise." Amber stuttered. She felt her friend's hand remove itself from hers, the water disturbed slightly as the girl climbed out of the pool.

"And I need you to promise one more thing. Please." Faridah asked quietly, water dripping off her lithe body.

"Anything." Amber stated, feeling the guilt begin to fester inside of her, wanting to appease it. To appease Faridah.

"Leave Viola behind when you do…whatever you need to do. I couldn't handle her being around me. Maybe she'll live, but…don't try to save her, please. Let her feel what it's like to be crushed under someone's boot for once." Faridah said coldly, grabbing her towel and beginning to dry herself off. Amber could only nod at the request, but Faridah's smile was enough to let her know that her friend would at least get something she wanted.

"I'm going to go dry off and get some sleep." Faridah said, looking back toward the house. She couldn't hide her disappointment from Amber, but there wasn't anything the brunette could do about it. "Make sure you get out before you get all wrinkly."

"Sweet dreams, Faridah." She said to the night air as the girl walked away from her. With each step, Amber's heart ached more. _I think I might have hurt her more than I can even imagine. I'm such a mess, sometimes…I just made out with my best friend…did I make the right decision? Will…will anyone else ever make me feel like that, ever want me like that…make me want them like that…ah, fuck, stop being selfish! Christ…I need to make this right. Finish that Cerberus shit and get her free of this mess… of me…at least for a while. She deserved better than this._

She propped herself up on the pool ledge and let the cool air waft against her body, unable to douse the embers inside her entirely. _My best friend…I was her shelter and now I was stupid and hurt her…fuck!_ Amber pulled her knees into her body and hugged them tight, burying her face in them as her body shook with sobs. Her mind clouded in misery, she wished the only thing she wanted was for Anderson to pull through and for their problem to be solved. The painful tremors in her heart, however, yearned for something more immediate, something physical, someone she sent away. She managed to make her way to her towel and change back into her clothes, slumping down onto a nearby padded chair as she slipped into the guilt that had begun to encompass her. Her eyes closed, compelling her to sleep, and fell a little further down.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, wow. Wrote close to 9.5k words this afternoon. I don't know how I'm doing it, to be honest. At least I'm getting a lot closer to the end, and doing it a lot quicker than I expected.**

**Wasn't sure whether I should have cut this chapter up, one pre-party, one during the party. I figured that it would be a bit unnecessary. Either way, it was going to be a Faridah heavy chapter. That was something that had to happen. I hope the "intimacy" scene wasn't too horrid. It's hard doing something like that when the only real thing involved on the POV's end is the physical nature of it. It was a challenge, and I'm pretty sure it's 'meh' or worse, but whatever. It's practice, and practice makes…well, not perfect, but perhaps a better scene next time around. **

**Again, this chapter is huge. A mammoth. I'm sorry. Thank you for your patience and for taking the time to read it. My heart skips a beat knowing there are others enjoying my silly little story (which actually isn't silly very often, but alas). I want to thank everyone who provides me feedback, you all give me lots to think about and help me reflect on the chapter, so here's to you! Yay!**

**Anywho, I have a busy-ish week, first full week of school. Lots of reading in my classes this semester, so I hope I'll have time to read everyone's fics, and write my own, AND still focus on my schoolwork. Here's to hoping it all works out :D Updates will not be as frequent as they have been recently, though. Maybe once a week again.**

**Anywho, have a good week! **


	20. Chapter 20

_July 1__st__ 2170  
_

* * *

Amber stared at the plates left on her desk beside her holo-piano; hot steam rising from each, the smells of freshly cooked chicken wafting toward her. She stepped barefoot from the bathroom to the desk and sat down, taking in all the smells of the food in front of her_. Chicken, potatoes, fresh bread…and my favourite salad! Two plates of each…well, I will need the energy tonight. Kind of wild that they're giving me the ability to fight back…_

Amber reached behind her wet locks of curls and rubbed her index finger on the small circular device she'd had inserted in the back of her skull just days prior. _Well, Cerberus wasn't the only one to give me the ability, I guess. This will be my first time really using it…let's hope these implants are all they're cracked up to be._

The Alliance had brought her in on a day off to get the surgery done, and quickly realized Cerberus had, at some point in the past, installed a monitor into her to measure a variety of activity and hormone levels. Amber wasn't certain how they managed to fix Cerberus snooping on them, but they needed her cover to hold, so they kept the tracer in her, modifying it to provide false readings._ This seemed like Viola's work…should I really leave her behind like Faridah asked? Faridah…_

Amber got off the bench and grabbed another towel from the bathroom for her hair, so it wouldn't' drip on her food, blushing as she passed the shower. _I…probably don't have time for another shower tonight. They'll need me out there soon. Then I'll have all my life…well, not like showers are a good stand-in for…ah fuck. Get your head out of the gutter, Amber. This is more important than feeling…whatever it is you want to feel. _She cleared her thoughts as she wrapped her hair up and returned to her food, picking up a fork.

_Anderson had better make sure tonight goes well, or…well, I might not be here to yell at him…_ she thought, taking a bite of the salad. _Should be an easy mission. Go in on the drop job, bait the Reds with what I've 'defected with' as per Viola's reports and draw their attention while our hackers do whatever they need to do to ensure the Reds go away for a long time, and to track down Cerberus and Fiske. Keep their attention long enough so Anderson can grab Fiske, and we all live happily ever after. The end. _Amber mused, mowing down on the mashed potatoes. _Alright, maybe not happily ever after for everyone, and maybe not the end…and maybe it's not THAT easy, but it's doable. We can do this. We…_

The beep of her omni-tool brought her focus away from her thoughts to a new message_. I really should get a better omni, one with video capability, and some other cool tricks… _she thought, as she opened it up and found a new message from Katie.

_Hey Amber! Me and the girls are gonna see a vid tonite, you should come! Seriously, you need to get out of that cave you live in every once in a while. PS: Is something up between you and Faridah? You two have been weeeeiiiird lately. PSPS: Seriously. At Heather's party I thought you were totally going to…_Amber shut down her omni as she read the final words and mulled over the possibility of meeting up with them again.

_If I got out unscathed, and if I finished in time, I could have a few hours before I had to turn myself over to Anderson…but…that doesn't seem likely. It's amazing that it's come down to this…I have these new friends that I probably won't see often, or ever, and they don't even know what I'm walking into, that I'm walking away…how do I just leave without saying goodbye? I'm going to miss them… _she thought, eating the rest of her meal while thinking up a good way to send her farewells, unsure if there ever was one.

As she stacked her two empty plates, she reopened the messaging system on her omni-tool and began typing. _Katie. I'm sorry I won't be able to make it tonight, I've got something really important that I need to deal with. Tell the rest of the girls that I'll miss them, and to have fun tonight. This thing might drag me somewhere for…well, I'm not sure how long, but I could be gone for a while. I'll get in touch as soon as I can afterward, but until then, know that your friendship's meant a lot to me. I know we haven't been around each other long, but it seems like every time I'm around you, you're helping everyone smile and have a good time. You helped me realize happiness is worth fighting for, so fight the good fight! Keep smiling, keep dancing!_

Amber sent off the message and started another one, her fingers typing furiously as she stared at her chrono._ Heather, if I don't see you sometime this week, the next time we'll meet will probably be in space. Not how I really wanted to end this summer, but sometimes you have to roll with what life gives you. Promise you'll look after Faridah for me, and promise you'll take care of yourself. Please. I can't believe we've only known each other a few months and you've taught me so much. Before you, I thought we were so different, that you girls were close to aliens than me, but I know now that we're more alike than we are different, that we face the same shit. Pardon my language. Thanks for that, anyway. I hope I see you again soon…in blues, apparently. Never really cared for the colour. Anyway, take care, say hi to your mom and dad for me. I'll try to get in contact as soon as I can._

_This is exhausting…_Amber thought as she fired off Heather's message and opened another one. _Joel, words can't describe how good of a mentor you've been for me. How patient you've been, how when me and Mel came into the library, you thought we were worthy to come in, unlike seemingly everyone else. Without you, I wouldn't be as well spoken, I wouldn't be as comfortable around people, and I definitely wouldn't be able to play the piano at all. By the way, I've been spending a lot more time at home learning full compositions and songs and hopefully in a year or two I'll be able to play something without the music in front of me. Maybe. Anyway, I won't be around for a while. Don't send that note off, the people you'd be sending it to already have their hooks in me, so no worries there. Not that I'm happy about it, because I'm not, but I'll make the best of it. I'll prove that you were right. I don't know the next time I'll be able to get a hold of you, but for now, thank you. You've changed my life._

Amber pressed send on her omni and started up one last message. _Faridah…_she started, her mind stalling, unable to find any words. She looked at the chrono and rushed off her seat. _Sorry, I'll have to finish you later. Time's ticking…_

* * *

Her predator pistol fired wide as she sprinted into the abandoned car park, hopping over the old rusty security rail and moving her feet toward the nearest stairwell. She'd scouted her path out well beforehand, choosing a few select buildings as bunkers to withstand whatever offense the reds put forth. The car park hadn't been her first choice; that was an abandoned department store a few blocks down, but she hadn't had the time to get there. Reds were converging on her location quickly, and she even spotted a figure in white and black chasing her a few blocks back, meaning Cerberus was shifting resources to her. _Good, bring them all here_, she thought, racing up the stairwell to the second floor from the top. _The Alliance will be here with reinforcements in five. No time for you to be cautious, and you're dead if you're feeling reckless_. She heard footsteps tromping up the old cement stairwell a few stories beneath her, and she knew they'd soon be sending skycars to bring their members to the top_. Of course, if the Alliance doesn't come in five, then I'm fucked, but …nah, that won't happen. Stick to the plan._

Amber burst through the doorway and made a beeline for the designated vantage point the Alliance had set up for her, sliding over one of the reinforced skycars into cover and resting her pistol on it for stability. There were three ways the Reds could approach her; from the stairwell, from the ramp at the far end of the car park leading to the floor beneath her, and the ramp at the side of the car park leading to the top floor. She narrowed the options to the stairwell and the ramp leading to the top, as the far ramp would leave them wide open and was useless considering vehicles were useless in the narrow confines of this level. _Top or bottom? Top or bottom?_ She asked herself, moving her pistol slightly to accommodate either option. She saw half a torso pass through the doorframe of the stairwell and kept her aim set there, letting off two rounds. _Bottom it is!_

The tall man staggered back into another Red behind him; loudly cursing and too focused on the new wound on his arm to realize the greater peril at hand, as a biotic throw crashed against the two, propelling them violently back into the cement room.

"That felt good." She muttered aloud, placing her pistol back on top of the skycar. "Exactly how I wanted it, and it took only about a second to charge. I could get used to this…"

The loud bursts of assault rifles sounded off behind her, bullets ricocheting off her armoured hidey-hole. _The fuck? _She wondered, spinning around for a second, seeing members of the Reds shooting out of skycars circling around the carpark. _Well that's awesome. Hopefully it won't last because I'm not sure I can duck for the next five or ten and not have reds in punching distance_. Spinning back around, she was met with the view of three gang members rushing down the ramp from the top level and two staggering through the stairwell. She fired off a few shots, but between the burst fire from all around her, and the cover fire from both the stairwell and the roof, she was forced to give up ground.

Amber quickly clipped her pistol to her side and pulled the shotgun slung across her back into her arms, cradling it for a moment before unlocking the safety. She put a little more focus on holding her barriers as she swung up and fired off a blast at a Red heading toward a pillar. Their strategy was simple; surround her and leave her with little usable cover. Three more had come down from the roof and one more had emerged from the stairwell; Amber cursed her luck as her shot caught the man in the head. _He won't be dead, but I'm pretty sure he'll be too busy bleeding to get up for a bit._

Amber launched a biotic throw at two nearby reds circling around her, catching one dead in the chest and sending him hard into an old cement pillar; the other red was fortunate enough to dive, but was at the mercy of Amber's shotgun. She wasn't feeling particularly merciful as she pulled the trigger, bullets impacting on her barrier, one or two grazing against her shoulder as they broke through. Amber winced and dropped back into cover. _Three down, two left in the first wave, four in the next wave. Come on Alliance, help me out here! You've got two minutes, or I'll probably start shooting you when you get here!_

Waiting for her shotgun to cool down entirely, she shifted around her small triangular space of cover, avoiding the cautious fire from the Reds and focused her breathing. _One on each side of you, four coming from the front. Should I…hrm. Heavy risk…but the… _she mused before her thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of heavier gunfire above her and a shuddering crash, sending bits of concrete and dust spewing down on her from above. _Distraction!_

Amber concentrated on her palm for a moment and rose, her arm arcing out as the tossed a singularity in the direction of the momentarily stunned quartet of Reds. Without looking to see if she was successful, she pivoted to face the gang member to her right firing off a single stray burst against her._ A girl Red pointing an assault rifle at me? Well how about that!_ She thought, the Red's gunfire peppering an area off to her right as Amber's shotgun blast had put the women off balance. She let off another round into the bleeding woman's torso and pivoted in time to have a shotgun round break through her own barriers, catapulting her over the hood of one of her armoured skycars and away from her cover.

She scrambled to her feet, thankful that her barriers took most of the impact and that she'd mostly came out of it with a tweaked knee, but a second burst of her assailant's shotgun quickly sent her scrambling back behind the car, on the wrong side. Amber checked her left as she heard some loud thuds, noticing four reds gingerly getting back to their feet. _Bought me some time, at least…_

A tinny clink sound brought her attention in front of her, where a small flashing canister had been rolled. _FUCK_

Amber dove toward it and shovel-tossed it toward the four, taking a round in her back for her troubles; sprawled out on the ground, she did her best to roll back toward whatever angle of cover she could find as her aggressor turned the corner. She wasn't sure which muscles reacted first, but she fired off her shotgun until it couldn't fire, and spent as much energy as she could on her barrier, eyes closed from the pain racing down her shoulder blades. A sharp pain from her leg elicited a short cry from her, but it also let her know she was alive, despite the storm of noise and hailing gunfire from both sides.

As she opened her eyes she saw the smoking corpse of the Red, fallen to his knees with a head sized gaping wound in his chest. Amber moaned from the pain coursing through her, crawling over the nearest skycar back into cover, hoping to hole up there until reinforcements came by. A shot from a pistol sent her slumping the final few inches from the bullet's momentum colliding with her shoulder.

_Fuck. This could have turned out better. No vid night for me, then._ Amber dropped her shotgun, her right arm feeling too numb and unresponsive to feasibly hold it, and took her pistol in her off hand, sidling up against one of the cars and slowly peeking her head up. A pile of three corpses lay a few metres away, where four had once been. _One left. Then I can call it a night._ She thought, hoping the adrenaline would keep her going for a while yet as she sat back down and scanned her surroundings. From the corner of her eye, she spotted her last target, moving from cover to cover. _Skycar to skycar, in fact…let's try this amp out. May as well give it a fair go…in case this doesn't end well for me._

Amber summoned as much biotic energy as she could focus on, calming her mind, placing her thoughts on the currents running through her, on each finger and palm movement. _Deep breaths, just…deep breaths and…_her breath caught, disrupting her focus for a bit from the exhaustion she was feeling. _The well's deeper than that, girl. Come on, a bit more! _She brought her focus back, felt the air across her palms and the electric blue aura of the mass effect fields on both hands and pushed forward as fast and hard as she could.

In an instant, the skycar went from five feet in front of her to sailing through the air, down the street, with what looked to be a flailing torso alongside it_. Well…that was…kind of cool. I think I want to sleep now._

She heard footsteps off in the distance and drowned them out; her guns laid at her side and she was feeling too exhausted to move any substantial amount. _If this is it…get it done Anderson_.

"Shepard?" a voice called out behind her. She wasn't sure how many times it was repeated before she realized it was addressing her.

"No one's called me that in years." she muttered grumpily, an Alliance soldier hurdling over one of the skycars surrounding her.

"You're looking pretty…beat up." He said, looking at the mess of a girl in front of him. "I've got a civilian down here! Get the med team!"

"Did…did you guys get Cerberus?" Amber asked, her throat feeling a little too dry for comfort.

"I'm not sure, but you bought us some time. We can hope." He said, leaning her forward slightly to look at her wounds. "Jesus. Did you…uh…clear this floor?" He craned his neck, trying to get better looks at the bodies strewn around.

"Unless you guys got some on the way in. Wasn't paying much attention after I threw the skycar. I figured…I figured that nine was enough. Maybe ten, I'm not sure. Do you have an energy bar?" Amber asked as a group of three other officers arrived with a stretcher. One of the three arrivals quickly pulled a small package from his case and tossed it to her.

"Eat up, you look tired." The newcomer stated, his voice gravelly and his advanced age showing. "I'm gonna need you to take off some of your clothes so I can bandage and gel you up properly."

Amber made her best attempt at rolling her eyes. "You'll need to cut them off me, I can barely feel my right arm. Can anyone not old enough to have kids just turn around for it, though? I think I've earned that much."

* * *

Faridah's omni-tool had been beeping for the past half hour, its constant shrill whine invading the silence of her room. She sat on the edge of her bed, trying to read a textbook on VIs, and patiently waiting for her friends to arrive to watch some horror vid about some King in Yellow. She didn't know any of the stars, but its reviews had been positive, and it had been a while since they'd had a good scream.

_But I swear, if someone doesn't stop messaging me, I'm going to scream!_ Faridah thought angrily, recalling her aunt's instructions not to answer her omni-tool tonight, before the woman had left on business. _'Just in case' she said. What the hell could anyone do from me answering my mail? Still…this past week's been really busy for her and if something might be happening…Amber…_ She looked back at the head of her bed, recalling the afternoon Amber had woken in her bed. Recalling what had put her there in the first place.

_God, I hope she's safe…_

A loud knock echoed down the hall into her room. _The front door? Must be Katie…_ Faridah thought as she bounded off her bed and down the hallway._ I'd better not have to pick Heather up, seeing as I don't have the car tonight._ As soon as she opened the door, Katie and Heather burst through.

"Why haven't you been answering my messages? I tried to vidcom you and you always answer! Why didn't you answer?" Heather demanded, pacing in the small foyer. Faridah looked at them, baffled. Heather looks a little too agitated and Katie looks like a wreck.

"What's going on?" Faridah asked, moving out into the living room.

"Why haven't you…" Heather started, before Katie pushed forward.

"Amber's not coming tonight and she said she might not see me again all summer, and she told Heather they'll probably see each other in space, and that doesn't make any sense, and she was writing like she was saying like, that she wouldn't see us again, and I didn't think it was too weird, but Heather got one too and you two are close so what's going on?" Katie rambled, slumping down onto the nearby couch.

Faridah's mind raced as she stared at Katie for a long moment before turning to Heather. "You two got messages?"

"You might have too, if you'd check your bloody mail!" Heather yelled before facepalming at her own reaction. "Shit, Faridah, you two have been fucking weird all summer and I'm worried as hell."

"Look…" Faridah started, opening her omni-tool's mail function and scrolling through her inbox. "I haven't gotten any mail from her so I don't know what's going on, alright?" She stated firmly, but couldn't hide her reaction as she slowly came to realize that with Amber and Viola gone, things might be in progress.

"Faridah, what are you not…" Heather started before a loud knock at the door interrupted her.

* * *

Anderson was pleased; the intel he'd received led them to a warehouse Cerberus had been using to store the vast quantities of red sand they'd been exporting off world. With the building entirely surrounded by a perimeter of Alliance soldiers and shuttles, he led his fire-team silently up the outer stairwell to what he imagined was the third floor. Their arrival had been aided by the gunfire inside the building, allowing them to seal off any exits during the chaos, reports ensuring them there were no civilians inside._ Must be the Reds and Cerberus at each other's throats over this._

Anderson signaled a countdown to his team before bursting through the doors. The warehouse was a catastrophic mess. Dust and smoke billowed through the air as fire overwhelmed the crates of drugs and other supplies on the main floor. Reds and Cerberus troops alike lay strewn out on the floor and over railings, their bloodied corpses mangled by flames and bullets. Anderson cautiously led his team toward the remaining bursts of gunfire, avoiding tripping on the bodies beneath them as they crept their way down the walkway to an office overlooking the warehouse. The firing ended abruptly and he could see some figures pacing and gesturing wildly at each other through the windows. _Hopefully they don't spot us before we get to them…we'd be sitting ducks out here._

Clear of the view from the office, he readied a flash-bang and slowly snuck toward the door, creeping it open slightly and tossing the device inside with a one second delay. The room erupted in light and the confused yelling of those inside, urging Anderson and his team to barge in, immediately disarming the two Cerberus troops inside. As one of his team administered a sedative, another two restraining the fallen foes, Anderson took a look around the room. Three reds lay dead, seemingly dragged off to the corner and smelling of gasoline. He continued through the room and made his way toward a nearby door, gun drawn, opening it and immediately recoiling at the stench. _What in the blazes…_

He took a moment to calm his nausea, and covered his nose and mouth, pushing the door open once more. Half melted onto the steel chair she was sitting on lay the smoking, swollen, burnt corpse of Viola. Anderson shut the door and marched back over to his team. "I have bad news…"

* * *

Amber was enjoying the shuttle ride on route to one of the 'Alliance-approved' hospitals. The medic had bandaged her up well, popped her dislocated shoulder back in place, and filled all the necessary holes with medigel. _The painkillers weren't a bad idea, either. Neither were the six energy bars they gave me. I'm feeling pretty alright._

"Hey kid, we got a comms for you." The alliance man who'd found her handed her an earpiece, which she slipped on her head. "Just tell me when you're good to go, miss."

Amber nodded her head and soon heard a little bit of background noise. "Anderson? Tell me you did it."

"Amber. Good to hear you, are you holding up?" Anderson asked, his tone pretty clear that he was redirecting.

"I've got enough medigel in me to keep me standing for a long time. Did you get them?" She repeated more firmly, a bead of sweat trailing down her forehead.

"Amber, we…I got tricked into taking a bait. We killed and captured a number of Cerberus agents, but we missed the main ones. The mole…that Viola woman…she's dead. They got to her. We're still tracing them, but they're likely on the run by now. I'm sorry."

Amber sat, stunned at the outcome. We _needed to get Fiske…if he's still alive, then…_

"Anderson, meet me at the facility. The residential building nearby, sixteenth floor, suite 2. Get there now." Amber demanded in haste, before turning to yell toward the cockpit. "Hey! Change of plans buddy, Anderson needs us to head back. New lead!"

"Shepard…" Anderson grumbled, sounding confused.

"Copy that. Over!" Amber yelled, hoping she was convincing enough as the ended the call. "Take me to the Reinhart sports facility. Anderson will meet us there."

"He didn't tell me anything about that, what did he say?" the man asked, Amber feeling the course of the shuttle shifting.

"Cerberus will be there."

The ride felt too long, but she knew time didn't really measure up properly in times like those. _If she's dead, I'll kill him. I'll kill both him and Fiske. _

Amber hopped off the shuttle wincing at the dull pain in her legs as she grabbed her pistol and holstered it. The area was quiet and on any other day, she'd appreciate that. _Tonight, not so much. _

"Hey kid, look, we've got two medics, a pilot, and me on this shuttle. All the others are halfway back to base or out with Anderson. If Cerberus is in there, we should wait." The soldier said, walking up to her and keeping pace as she headed toward the apartment building. "I'm just saying, we're no match if there are two trained guys in there."

"Then watch the door and make sure no one gets in or out. If someone's here already, they want two people dead. One of them is up there, and the other's me, but every second I waste is one that the person up there might not have." Amber stated calmly, chomping on another energy bar as she got up to the doors. "When Anderson comes, have him find me."

* * *

Faridah huddled in the condo's safe room with Heather and Katie around her. It was a cramped space, but it was secure, and safe from most forms of detection. _Including sound, thankfully_, Faridah thought, Katie spewing her worries into the small square room. The girls had protested the decision, but luckily she had quickly gotten Heather onto her side, vetoing Katie's confused and fearful refusals. Faridah was doing her best to stop from trembling, but she feared she wasn't doing a good job of it.

"So we're in here…why?" Heather asked, sounding annoyed, but it was clear on the screens in front of them that three people were tearing the apartment up looking for something. _Or someone._

"Long story or short story?" Faridah mumbled reluctantly, not feeling she had much choice in the matter.

"Short." Heather responded stiffly, her intense gaze forcing Faridah to shrink back slightly.

"My aunt's a terrible person and her bosses are terrible people and they might want me dead because I know what they did." Faridah blurted out, turning away from her friends. "Well, not Viola, but these people do."

"And…that's what's had you on edge for a while?" Heather asked, her voice much softer than before.

"You think?" Faridah's words burst out of her, immediately regretting the sarcastic tone. "Look, if someone's basically promised they're going to kill you, and you don't know when, you get really nervous and anxious and terrified and…and…" Faridah's stumbling words cut off as Heather pulled her into a tight hug.

"I had no idea…I…" Heather started as Katie jumped up and went up to the screens. All three girls watched as a figure came through the foyer into the kitchen.

"Why is Amber here?" Katie asked, the horror uncensored from her voice as she watched two of the three intruders moved toward her, pistols drawn.

"I…have no idea."

* * *

Amber limped through the doorway as quietly as she could, doing her best to sneak into the kitchen. It wasn't good enough, certainly; she saw a laser sight remain firmly on the wall opposite her as she leaned against the doorframe separating the kitchen from the living room. She pulled her knife into one hand and readied her pistol, hoping she'd be the faster draw.

A noise from behind her threw her attention in that direction, sliding out of the way of pistol fire, sending two rounds into the offending agent's chest. He tumbled back, but two strong arms wrapped around her chest tightly before she had a chance to pursue. Amber used what leverage she had to rock her body slightly enough to get her knife arm extended, letting her rake the knife across the second agent's thigh. One of his arms loosened, letting her slip out of his grasp and launch him across the room with a biotic throw, his body crashing through the drywall. She spun on her heel clumsily and fired another round in the other agent's direction, only to get tackled to the ground, her pistol falling from her grasp.

Amber used the momentum to her advantage as well as she could, rolling with the tackle and half pushing the man off of her as she spun and swung down with her knife. He used his arms to block her downward motion and kicked out at her, his boot cracking against her jaw. The man worked to his feet and reached for her gun which had fallen during the tackle. Amber sprang at him, one hand surging for the barrel of the pistol and the other lashing out with her knife. His pistol was able to fire once before the knife impaled through his ribs again and again, blood sputtering out of his body with each strike. The man went limp and Amber took her gun back, finishing her work on the unconscious man half stuck in the wall.

As she turned to the living room entrance her pistol began to scream at her, the heatsink overloaded.

"Where are your manners, Miss Shepard?" she heard Fiske ask calmly. It wasn't often that he would speak to her, but she remembered his taunts and his words from her 'acclimation' training with the whip. Just hearing his voice again incensed her. He stood a few feet inside the living room wearing some form of light armor. "You come into this abode with guns and knives rather than words. What am I to make of this?"

"That I'm kind of pissed you came here to kill a teenager on your way out of town. That you're a sick twisted pile of filth that's going to try and hurt more innocent children." Amber growled, turning to fully face him.

"I'm merely working to advance the human race. Your sacrifices will help humanity take its rightful place in the galaxy. But you would try to undo that. So I am not here to kill a single teenager, Miss Shepard. I am here for two of them. Now where is she?" Fiske asked, backing up a few steps. "Is she in their safe room? Shall I open it and kill her first, or would you rather I kill you instead, to spare you the sight?"

Amber prowled forward into the room, checking her angles and noticing he was alone. She would have smiled if she wasn't so weary, and if he wasn't wearing armor. Amber tossed a weak throw at him as a test, which vanished a few inches from his body.

"Fucking shields." Amber muttered. "Take off your cage and let's see who comes out on top." She spread out her stance and readied her knife, her other hand beckoning him forward. Fiske just laughed.

"Miss Shepard! Do you think I am so dense as to give up my advantage for pride? I have pride in my causes, my abilities, and my successes. I am not blind to my pride, however. Now, shall I kill you first? I…" Fiske started, Amber's biotically charged body crashing into him and interrupting his monologue, sending him tumbling violently down the hall. Amber stalked toward him, barely limping due to the adrenaline coursing through her body.

She swung down at him with her knife, slicing open a small weak point in the armor at his shoulder as his hand pulled her down, his leg kicking hers out from under her as she fell awkwardly to the floor. He flipped over on top of her, straddling her waist and landed a hard metal punch against her cheek, the crack of steel knuckle on bone echoing through the condo.

"Miss Shepard. You should not have come here. But I am glad you did. It is more efficient this way." He said, as he threw punch after punch at her. Amber did a good job avoiding or blocking the shots, but her forearms and face were hurting too much to keep enduring the punishment. As Fiske reeled up for a slightly heavier punch, she saw an opportunity. _You just broke your own rules, Fiske. Don't leave the enemy an opportunity to escape… _she thought as she braced her foot against his, trapped the arm holding her down and swept him over with all the strength she could muster, using the momentum of the roll to hop to her feet.

Fiske scrambled to his knees but soon felt his body start to float midair. Amber stood a few feet away, arms shaking from the fractures and how painful her biotic gestures were becoming. The adrenalin wearing off, Amber couldn't react quick enough to Fiske sliding his knife off his hip and tossing it at her; even with the disorienting position of floating freely, his knife sliced through the air and sharply embedded itself in Amber's already wounded right shoulder.

Not letting him earn any time to recover she pressed forth and gathered the last remnants of her energy and biotically charged at him, hurtling him down the remainder of the hallway into the wall, his body slumping somewhat at the impact, his armor cracked and falling off in places. Amber trudged the last few meters up to the Cerberus agent, glowering at the bloody mess he claimed for a body.

"I won't kill you kindly. Hopefully I won't kill you at all. But coming here and threatening my family?" she choked out, blood and saliva making it harder to breathe and form words. "You'll pay for that."

The man groaned from his hole in the wall as he slowly righted himself and faced her. His eyes opened to a figure wreathed in blue, and then she was on him, pain searing through his body as his skeleton began to splinter from the hips outward, her knee having crushed that real estate horrifically.

Amber ignored the hoarse screams, at least for the short duration that they lasted before the man fell unconscious, and staggered back down the hall, her blood-soaked legs giving out as she reached the living room. She could hear footsteps from far off behind her and felt déjà vu again. It was a comforting feeling.

* * *

Faridah saw the carnage that had turned her hallway into a disaster site. She saw the puddles of blood pooling across the floors she was so familiar with. She'd never seen a place so honestly red in her life, and that shock was only dulled by the crumpled figure at the end of it. She briskly made her way over and examined the fallen brunette; turning her over, hoping that she wasn't hurt too badly.

Watching the attacks on a screen was difficult enough; even with the bad camera angles and poor lighting, she had been shocked at the sheer violence of it all. Katie had hid her face in Heather's chest as the brunette stared on in what had looked to be reverence and fear. Heather had gone to get Faridah something to clean Amber up with, but looking at her, there didn't seem to be much she could do.

Blood leaked thickly from her nose and mouth, making gruesome trails down the side of her face, and causing large smear marks from where it had pooled around her chin. A minor gash split her forehead above her right eyebrow, one of her brown curls unable to free itself from the sticky mess. Her face was red and swollen, her lip split almost comically down the middle, her eyelids fluttering as she dreamed. Faridah hoped her dreams were more pleasant than reality.

Heather arrived soon with a bowl of warm water, a facecloth and some medigel, kneeling beside her younger friends as Faridah got to work at cleaning the blood off. Her heart ached as Amber's body would tense and twitch as she cleaned around each open wound. She didn't hear the front door open, only shooed away the shadows nonchalantly as they stood over Amber's body.

She felt Heather's hand hold her arm still as she reached to dab at Amber's forehead, her friend's other hand stripping her of the facecloth as she watched the younger brunette be gently lifted onto a stretcher. Seeing Amber's left hand open up from the fist it had been, she reached forward and softly clutched it, smiling when she felt her friend's fingers return the grasp.

* * *

Amber awoke from her dreams to an overwhelming numbness. Everything felt heavy and distinct, each movement labored and made blatantly obvious, feeling every muscle. She went to clench and unclench her hands slowly, and found herself incapable with her left. Making the effort to open her eyes, she found herself in the back of a shuttle, yet again bandaged up and attached to some flat surface. To her right, Faridah sat, holding her hand and staring off out the window blankly. Amber coughed twice, clearing her throat enough to speak, dragging the girl's attention to her.

"I take it that vid night didn't happen?"Amber asked, her voice straining at the effort. "I feel weird." Faridah shifted closer, her eyes scanning over Amber's face intently.

"You're on painkillers. You were hurt…" Faridah said, stumbling on her words as her breathing turned ragged, tears pooling in her eyes. "They hurt you really badly. I'm so sorry!"

"Shhh." Amber started, turning her head fully to face her friend. "This wasn't your fault. You're safe. I just wanted to keep my promise."

Faridah animatedly shook her head, a stray tear flying onto Amber's cheek. "No, that was…I would never ask you to do that, ever. Ever. Please…"

"Faridah, I don't have much in my life that's good. I'd ask that of myself even if you wouldn't. You're free now but…" Amber paused and closed her eyes, feeling more exhausted with each word. "Viola…"

"Good riddance." Faridah spat, pausing when Amber shook her head slightly.

"Fuck…Faridah, she was …horrible. She did bad things…" Amber said, pausing to cough up some blood, Faridah quickly wiping it from the brunette's face. "But she was your aunt. Wasn't always like that. Just don't…don't lose track of those good memories just because of what she did. What she did…wasn't all that she was. Even if she forgot how…she loved you. She was a good woman once."

Faridah sat still and exhaled loudly."I won't forgive her."

"I sure as fuck won't. She deserved it. But she was human. No one's fully evil, Faridah. Besides…she helped me meet you." Amber's voice was weakening as the numbness started to fade, unable to concentrate on talking and ignoring the pain at the same time.

Faridah looked back at the shuttle's pilot, and then to Amber. "You know, we'll be at the hospital soon. You'll be fine. It will just…"

"I didn't send you a message." Amber gritted out, opening tearful eyes at Faridah. "I'm sorry."

The raven-haired girl leaned forward and stroked Amber's cheek gently. "Hey, it's alright. I understand."

"No. I…fuck, this hurts. I can't even hug you goodbye." Amber cried, wincing at the pain shooting through her with each breath.

"Amber if you want, I can…" Faridah started, before looking back to the window.

She knew it was selfish, that it was wrong, but she desperately wanted Faridah to tell her she'd take her someplace safe. That she'll pass through the four years with the Alliance like a bad dream and wake up in her arms and a pile of comfortable sheets. That if she wanted, they could find a life together. Faridah just turned back to her and smiled sadly, remaining silent, and Amber felt both devastated and proud of the simple gesture.

Amber felt the shuttle slow for landing and blinked away her tears.

"I promise I'll write." She whispered. Faridah laughed and went to lightly jab Amber's shoulder, but fortunately thought twice about it.

"You'd better get a good omni-tool for once and vidmail me!" She laughed, giving Amber's hand another squeeze. "Are you sure you can't get away from this?"

Amber shook her head slowly. "I can't, it's official. Everything's been taken care of, and I'm on my way to an Alliance hospital before they ship me off wherever their academy thing is. But I'll let you know when I get my place on a colony, I'll even pay your way."

"Well, look at you, charming me off to some strange majestic planet." Faridah noted playfully as the shuttle came to a stop.

"God, I'll miss you." Amber choked out, wanting to inject some humour, but she just couldn't grasp any. "I wish I could take a holo of you right now." She finished, sheepishly. _This is it…and it's already gone._

"Then remember me." Faridah said simply, bending over and kissing Amber gently on the lips. The touch was invigorating and calming, setting her heart at ease for the first time all night. Faridah pulled away and smiled. "I…could have loved you, you know."

Amber smiled at the confession and nodded. "I know. I might have even proved worthy of it, eventually. You're my best friend…you'll find someone better than beat up lil' Amber Shepard."

The shuttle doors opened and two Alliance medics moved over to her side, propping her stretcher onto a hover pallet. Amber squeezed her friend's hand one last time. "Take care of yourself, Faridah."

"You too…" Faridah mouthed as Amber's hand fell from her grasp, the pallet moving quickly away from her, taking the brunette away.

Amber laid back on the stretcher and imagined all the possible lives she'd abandoned, all the things she'd never have, never experience, thanks to her own decisions. Flashes of lives spent with Faridah filled her mind; swimming in Lake Louise together the summer Faridah would graduate, cuddling on a couch together on their second anniversary, going on a trip with Heather and Matt to some amazing place like Croatia, fixing Faridah's skycar so she could get to work safely and on time, falling asleep next to her warm body every night and never allowing that small fact of life to become boring. She allowed these thoughts to swirl through her mind as fingers prodded her and began patching her up properly.

She closed her eyes, comforted in the idea that even if those couldn't happen, that her future was a blank slate. The galaxy was full of people for both her and Faridah, and they could both find some peace somewhere out there in the vast reaches of space. She could find whatever it was she was looking for out there, and could accomplish whatever she needed to. Reveling in the excitement and mystery of it all, she let the sedatives take her into the soothing embrace of her dreams, where a lush green meadow and a tall red oak awaited her.

* * *

**A/N: And that's Flotsam! Hooray! Twenty whole chapters, and over 130k words! WOW. I did not expect this when I started back in May, and I certainly didn't expect this kind of response. Especially in the last week, my fic's been getting serious traffic, so thank you to everyone who's jumped in on my story (apologies for there being so much to catch up on). You're all pretty awesome individuals!**

**So yeah. It's over. I had this envisioned about a week ago, and I strayed from it a bunch while writing, but eventually came back to what I had. In the end, I'm satisfied with it. It's hard to end a story. I know that now.**

**Still, I have a new story, "Feathers", continuing this Shepard's experiences, starting just before the events of ME1 and leading through it (as I write, of course). If you liked this story, mayhaps you will like this next one! No pressure though :)**

**Anywho, I just want to thank everyone again. Honestly, it's been a pretty wild ride and the motivation I've gotten from the reviews and PMs and alerts/favourites, forum discussions at BSN…you made this more worthwhile than I could have imagined. I hope you enjoyed my little story, and I bid you adieu.**

**Safe travels! Have a great weekend!  
**


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